Chapter 86
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I woke up around noon which I'd immediately regret since I didn't get to make Dante breakfast or so much as kiss him before he'd left for work...I sorted through papers looking for something to do while he was out...unfortunately there wasn't much left that he hadn't already done. It sorta surprised me. But then again those expenses were probably insane and we didn't use the entire tower even if he did deck it out.
"I'm booored...when's darling coming baaaack?" I walked over to where our dog was chilling in his usual spot whenever one of us leaves he sits in the spot where the two walls join by the door and keeps watch for whoever left to return. That or he's keeping guard for demons and wants to alert us when he senses one coming. He's not a hell hound he's a normal lap dog...kinda normal but I know he's not a demon cuz Dante told me so I've never questioned his logic in all the years we've been together.
*she sighed and stared out the window just as she's about to sit down on the floor the phone on the desk rings. She jogged over to the desk and picked it up hoping for something to do.*
"Devil may cry what can I help you wi-"
"LILY how do I get deer blood and guts to go away?!"
"What in satans asshole are you talking about?-.-"
"...the the kids got hungry and I got home late last night jess went hunting and killed a deer and they cooked and ate the meet...but now there's blood and guts all over the place"
Lily wants to question why I small child would go hunting rather than steal some cash and order take out but knowing Patty she doubts she'll get a start answer outta her...
"...pay me and I'll do it we're known for dirty work aren't we?"
"What in the unholy god dam has killing demons and occasionally humans have to do with cleaning up dead deer?...fuck it oh wait I'm broke I'm taking care of these little rug-rats..."
".....fam call me back after you ask Nero what else I accept besides cash..."
"Wait wha-"
She hung up on Patty and sat with the dog in the corner for five minutes before having to get back up again to talk to Patty...
~Nero and patty's conversation in the form of texts~
"I need lily to do a job she said she takes stuff other then money but she was vague as hell so spell"
"...I ow you's work sometimes if you give her a offering that works to since ya know she's a god"
"...how much would one charge to clean up dead deer?"
"How should I know I've never gotten that as a job?"
"When you say offering what's that mean do I gotta kill someone"
"Fuck no what are you smoking?! That just means give her something she likes or whatever food she likes and tie it to a note like at church and give it to her"
"You know I don't believe in those deitys but thanks JESS GIVE ME CANDY I NEED TO MAKE A OFFERING TO A BIG BOOBED GOD"
"...are you using Siri cuz I just got that in you text..."
"...crap sorry and yea ok bye"
After calling lily over she ended up coming to the house and cleaned up for her. But she was greated with many small children watching her from the moment she stepped inside.
She found this unsettling so she eventually spoke up while looking for the bleach.
"...what do you want?"
One of the boys missing an eye speaks up.
"...whys a god cleaning up?"
"...listen only douchy gods don't answer requests no matter how stupid. Second where's the bleach"
*Jessica handed her some bleach*
"Thanks"
She ended up teaching Jessica how to get rid of evidence if she ever had to kill a thing and or person in self defense not knowing what this odd little girl was capable of she probably wouldn't have done so if she'd known. Because more then unlikely she wouldn't use it for self defense one she's old enough to live on her own.
"...miss can you give us money so Patty doesn't have to stay out all the time we're lonely"
The kid was missing an arm...she had no idea why or how that'd happened.
"Uh i..."
*he gave her a beat up manga*
Lily looks at the kid then sighs.
"ok so here's what I'm gonna do but the trick is to con em since the magic won't last long sell the gold to some dumbass and then take the cash and ditch em also toss this in their face after you get the money...I
Need coal shit"
[She's gonna pull the trick ed used on someone to get them cash fast]
*patty dropped some shack of coal in front of her*
"...I'm doubting your actually gonna do shi-"
She clapped her hands and slammed them on the floor turning the coal into gold...
"That only lasts for 24 hours so get rid of it fast the further away from where you live the better good luck bye"
She quickly goes home leaving a confused Patty and some kids to take care of the con job. When she returned she found lady and trish in the office playing with Cerberus ll.
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I woke up around noon which I'd immediately regret since I didn't get to make Dante breakfast or so much as kiss him before he'd left for work...I sorted through papers looking for something to do while he was out...unfortunately there wasn't much left that he hadn't already done. It sorta surprised me. But then again those expenses were probably insane and we didn't use the entire tower even if he did deck it out.
"I'm booored...when's darling coming baaaack?" I walked over to where our dog was chilling in his usual spot whenever one of us leaves he sits in the spot where the two walls join by the door and keeps watch for whoever left to return. That or he's keeping guard for demons and wants to alert us when he senses one coming. He's not a hell hound he's a normal lap dog...kinda normal but I know he's not a demon cuz Dante told me so I've never questioned his logic in all the years we've been together.
*she sighed and stared out the window just as she's about to sit down on the floor the phone on the desk rings. She jogged over to the desk and picked it up hoping for something to do.*
"Devil may cry what can I help you wi-"
"LILY how do I get deer blood and guts to go away?!"
"What in satans asshole are you talking about?-.-"
"...the the kids got hungry and I got home late last night jess went hunting and killed a deer and they cooked and ate the meet...but now there's blood and guts all over the place"
Lily wants to question why I small child would go hunting rather than steal some cash and order take out but knowing Patty she doubts she'll get a start answer outta her...
"...pay me and I'll do it we're known for dirty work aren't we?"
"What in the unholy god dam has killing demons and occasionally humans have to do with cleaning up dead deer?...fuck it oh wait I'm broke I'm taking care of these little rug-rats..."
".....fam call me back after you ask Nero what else I accept besides cash..."
"Wait wha-"
She hung up on Patty and sat with the dog in the corner for five minutes before having to get back up again to talk to Patty...
~Nero and patty's conversation in the form of texts~
"I need lily to do a job she said she takes stuff other then money but she was vague as hell so spell"
"...I ow you's work sometimes if you give her a offering that works to since ya know she's a god"
"...how much would one charge to clean up dead deer?"
"How should I know I've never gotten that as a job?"
"When you say offering what's that mean do I gotta kill someone"
"Fuck no what are you smoking?! That just means give her something she likes or whatever food she likes and tie it to a note like at church and give it to her"
"You know I don't believe in those deitys but thanks JESS GIVE ME CANDY I NEED TO MAKE A OFFERING TO A BIG BOOBED GOD"
"...are you using Siri cuz I just got that in you text..."
"...crap sorry and yea ok bye"
After calling lily over she ended up coming to the house and cleaned up for her. But she was greated with many small children watching her from the moment she stepped inside.
She found this unsettling so she eventually spoke up while looking for the bleach.
"...what do you want?"
One of the boys missing an eye speaks up.
"...whys a god cleaning up?"
"...listen only douchy gods don't answer requests no matter how stupid. Second where's the bleach"
*Jessica handed her some bleach*
"Thanks"
She ended up teaching Jessica how to get rid of evidence if she ever had to kill a thing and or person in self defense not knowing what this odd little girl was capable of she probably wouldn't have done so if she'd known. Because more then unlikely she wouldn't use it for self defense one she's old enough to live on her own.
"...miss can you give us money so Patty doesn't have to stay out all the time we're lonely"
The kid was missing an arm...she had no idea why or how that'd happened.
"Uh i..."
*he gave her a beat up manga*
Lily looks at the kid then sighs.
"ok so here's what I'm gonna do but the trick is to con em since the magic won't last long sell the gold to some dumbass and then take the cash and ditch em also toss this in their face after you get the money...I
Need coal shit"
[She's gonna pull the trick ed used on someone to get them cash fast]
*patty dropped some shack of coal in front of her*
"...I'm doubting your actually gonna do shi-"
She clapped her hands and slammed them on the floor turning the coal into gold...
"That only lasts for 24 hours so get rid of it fast the further away from where you live the better good luck bye"
She quickly goes home leaving a confused Patty and some kids to take care of the con job. When she returned she found lady and trish in the office playing with Cerberus ll.
I woke up around noon which I'd immediately regret since I didn't get to make Dante breakfast or so much as kiss him before he'd left for work...I sorted through papers looking for something to do while he was out...unfortunately there wasn't much left that he hadn't already done. It sorta surprised me. But then again those expenses were probably insane and we didn't use the entire tower even if he did deck it out. "I'm booored...when's darling coming baaaack?" I walked over to where our dog was chilling in his usual spot whenever one of us leaves he sits in the spot where the two walls join by the door and keeps watch for whoever left to return. That or he's keeping guard for demons and wants to alert us when he senses one coming. He's not a hell hound he's a normal lap dog...kinda normal but I know he's not a demon cuz Dante told me so I've never questioned his logic in all the years we've been together. *she sighed and stared out the window just as she's about to sit down on the floor the phone on the desk rings. She jogged over to the desk and picked it up hoping for something to do.* "Devil may cry what can I help you wi-" "LILY how do I get deer blood and guts to go away?!" "What in satans asshole are you talking about?-.-" "...the the kids got hungry and I got home late last night jess went hunting and killed a deer and they cooked and ate the meet...but now there's blood and guts all over the place" Lily wants to question why I small child would go hunting rather than steal some cash and order take out but knowing Patty she doubts she'll get a start answer outta her... "...pay me and I'll do it we're known for dirty work aren't we?" "What in the unholy god dam has killing demons and occasionally humans have to do with cleaning up dead deer?...fuck it oh wait I'm broke I'm taking care of these little rug-rats..." ".....fam call me back after you ask Nero what else I accept besides cash..." "Wait wha-" She hung up on Patty and sat with the dog in the corner for five minutes before having to get back up again to talk to Patty... ~Nero and patty's conversation in the form of texts~ "I need lily to do a job she said she takes stuff other then money but she was vague as hell so spell" "...I ow you's work sometimes if you give her a offering that works to since ya know she's a god" "...how much would one charge to clean up dead deer?" "How should I know I've never gotten that as a job?" "When you say offering what's that mean do I gotta kill someone" "Fuck no what are you smoking?! That just means give her something she likes or whatever food she likes and tie it to a note like at church and give it to her" "You know I don't believe in those deitys but thanks JESS GIVE ME CANDY I NEED TO MAKE A OFFERING TO A BIG BOOBED GOD" "...are you using Siri cuz I just got that in you text..." "...crap sorry and yea ok bye" After calling lily over she ended up coming to the house and cleaned up for her. But she was greated with many small children watching her from the moment she stepped inside. She found this unsettling so she eventually spoke up while looking for the bleach. "...what do you want?" One of the boys missing an eye speaks up. "...whys a god cleaning up?" "...listen only douchy gods don't answer requests no matter how stupid. Second where's the bleach" *Jessica handed her some bleach* "Thanks" She ended up teaching Jessica how to get rid of evidence if she ever had to kill a thing and or person in self defense not knowing what this odd little girl was capable of she probably wouldn't have done so if she'd known. Because more then unlikely she wouldn't use it for self defense one she's old enough to live on her own. "...miss can you give us money so Patty doesn't have to stay out all the time we're lonely" The kid was missing an arm...she had no idea why or how that'd happened. "Uh i..." *he gave her a beat up manga* Lily looks at the kid then sighs. "ok so here's what I'm gonna do but the trick is to con em since the magic won't last long sell the gold to some dumbass and then take the cash and ditch em also toss this in their face after you get the money...I Need coal shit" She's gonna pull the trick ed used on someone to get them cash fast *patty dropped some shack of coal in front of her* "...I'm doubting your actually gonna do shi-" She clapped her hands and slammed them on the floor turning the coal into gold... "That only lasts for 24 hours so get rid of it fast the further away from where you live the better good luck bye" She quickly goes home leaving a confused Patty and some kids to take care of the con job. When she returned she found lady and trish in the office playing with Cerberus ll.
