I still clearly remember the day when my marriage was decided.
It was a freezing afternoon.
“Master is calling you. He has something to talk to you about.” A voice called out to me from behind me as I was sweeping the fallen leaves that were blown by the fierce northern wind, and I turned back.
There stood a servant boy of the same age as me, and he glared at me in disappointment. Why do I have to do something like this? ――― This was written on the boy’s face. He got even more annoyed when I just stood there without replying.
“Are you listening? If you are, then answer. Simpleton.”
I became even more speechless when I was attacked with cold scorn.
Idiot, blockhead, useless, and simpleton. ――― Endless abuse gets hurled my way. My heart still felt like it was being gouged out even if I was used to the pain. My heart, which was flowing with blood, chilled, and I felt as if it had frozen over.
I froze while gripping the broom handle.
The hard feeling of the handle brought me back, and I felt like I was even being rejected by inorganic matter.
The boy lost his temper at not receiving a reply from me no matter how long he stood there. He said over his shoulders, “Hurry up and go,” before leaving.
I watched as the dead leaves chased after him with a rustle, and lamented that I had to sweep again.
――― It won’t become clean no matter how much I swept.
I fixed my hood, raised my face and saw the grey and cloudy winter sky. It looked like it would rain at any time.
The fallen leaves stick to the ground when it rains, and it becomes difficult to sweep. I wanted to finish cleaning right away, but even a simpleton like me understood that the Master’s order had priority.
I gave up, put the broom and dustpan away and went to where the Master was.
“You’re slow.” I was struck with this comment as soon as I entered his study and bowed my head in apology.
I saw a middle-aged man standing at the window that was the only light source of this dim room when I raised my face. He frowned as if he was looking at something disgusting.
In contrast to me, the man was wearing a luxurious velvet jacket with a silk shirt with lots of lace underneath.
His pants and shoes were also first-class goods. However, the delicate buttons on his shirt looked as if they would flip off at any moment because he was fat.
His face was round and made it seem like his handsome face from his youth was a lie. His cheeks and chin were full of fat.
The only thing that hadn’t changed was his vibrant blonde hair. That day, he had it combed to the back of his head so that it wouldn’t become dishevelled.
――― A pig in noble clothes.
In those days, I called him this; an ugly and greedy pig with no grace.
The man’s name is Rudolph Heinz von Lagerfeld.
A noble with the rank of Marquis, even though he was mostly ruined, and the master of this mansion.
At the same time, he was my master and father.
I was a child born between this man and my mother, who was a prostitute, and I was taken to this man’s home six years ago when my mother passed away because of an epidemic disease.
“What do you want to talk to me about?” I asked while overlooking his black and dirty hands, and he replied by clicking his tongue.
What he didn’t like was probably my very existence.
I think it’s funny.
It was all this man’s fault that I exist and looked dirty.
“Stop acting like a servant. You’ll be trained in etiquette and culture from tomorrow.”
“What is the meaning of this?” I asked.
The man twisted his face in disgust.
“It means that you’ll be treated as my daughter.”
What are you saying now?
I was insulted as a prostitute’s daughter and as a greedy girl. You worked me hard and told me that if I wanted to stay in this house, then I had to work as a servant.
You worked me until my back started hurting, took away my meals if I slacked off by finding fault in me and threw me in the cold.
And yet, why are you saying such a thing now…?
“What’s with that look? The extremely greedy you is going to be treated as a noble’s daughter, you know? What don’t you like? You should be grateful and rub your head against the floor.”
I couldn’t look him straight in the face as he laughed unpleasantly, so I looked down.
I slowly kneeled down, put my hands on the floor, and lowered my head while grovelling.
The floor was cold and froze my heart.
At that time, I didn’t just feel the pain that I was used to, I also knew that this was humiliation. So, I didn’t resist.
It was better to throw away what little pride I had instead of opposing him and getting hit.
“Why…”
“What?” He asked, probably because it was hard to hear me while I was grovelling.
I slowly lifted my face, sat down on the floor and asked again, “Would you tell me why?”
“I’m going to use you as a pawn. I’ll marry you off.”
“Marry?”
“Yes. Rejoice. Your partner is a young nobleman. He doesn’t just have money, he’s also good-looking. He’s a waste on someone like you with a low rank.”
I had no choice but to doubt my ears. I was dumbfounded and muttered, “Why me?”
This man had another daughter who was turning 16 this year. She was a lady who was raised carefully like a princess; she was a genuine noble’s daughter.
Wouldn’t it be better to marry off that girl instead of me, who is of low birth and hadn’t been educated?
“Idiot, there’s only you. Victoria is the heir to the Lagerfeld House. She won’t be getting married into another house. We will adopt her husband.”
I remembered something important when I saw that he wasn’t going to stop laughing.
This man wasn’t satisfied if he didn’t make me unhappy.
In place of my mother, he wants to make me, his daughter, unhappy.
That was why he took me in as an orphan.
『Come to my house, Ophelia. Let’s live together.』
He extended his hand to me with a smile on his face, and yet, as soon as we arrived at the mansion, he slapped my palm away.
『You will be punished in place of your traitor mother.』
He severely abused me, worked me to the bone and beat me up whenever he was in a bad mood.
The servants understood what he wanted and banded together to oppress me. They vented their dissatisfaction on me.
『I won’t let you be happy. I’ll make you suffer more than I have.』
The man mother loved wasn’t here anymore.
There was only a pitiful and ugly man, who wasn’t able to carry out his feelings and was distorted by his despair.
And that wasn’t my father.
We may be connected by blood, but he wasn’t my father.
“You’ll be trained for two months. I’ll arrange a tutor, so become the perfect lady. You’re worthless if you can’t do this. You can go do the same job as your mother or enter the monastery.”
I’m sure this marriage wasn’t a normal marriage. There must be a catch because the other party’s conditions are good.
My heart was filled with anger as if it were being gouged out.
My heart won’t freeze if I don’t do, and I won’t feel sad. But, I do feel as if I have been abandoned.
“I took someone like you in with no compensation, and let you stay in this house. I gave you clothes to wear and food to eat. Return the favour,” the man finished speaking and waved his hand to tell me to get out.
“I get angry looking at that face that looks like your mother’s. Good grief, I would have loved you if you hadn’t looked like her.”
I stood up, bowed and headed to the door.
I tried not to see what expression he was making. It didn’t matter whether he was glaring or sneering.
I walked quickly through the dim corridor.
The head maid will triumphantly reprimand me if I don’t get back to work quickly. That woman wouldn’t listen even if I told her that I was called by the Master.
――― Ah, but…
I suddenly changed my mind and stopped.
That man told me to stop acting like a servant. It was a joke that he omitted the fact that he was working me to the bone and instead called it acting, but I had no choice but to obey him.
I don’t have to wear tattered clothes, and I don’t have to worry about sweeping the fallen leaves even if I see rain.
I will be a lady of the Lagerfeld House from tomorrow.
I was driven by the urge to shout and covered my face with both hands.
“I won’t be unhappy.”
This is his mansion. So, I have to obey his orders while I’m in this mansion.
I will aim to become the perfect lady, and if I can’t, then I will do what that man wants and become a prostitute or a nun.
But, it will be different once I’m out of this mansion.
“I won’t be unhappy,” I swore.
I smelt dry dirt from the hand which was holding the broken umbrella.
I was given a decent room instead of the storage from the day I was ordered to get married and wore a dress instead of the tattered servant clothes.
This navy and grey dress was remarkably plain when compared to the dresses that his daughter, Victoria, wore, and was something that a widow would wear, but it was much more comfortable than the tattered servant clothes.
I was given three meals a day without missing any, and I was able to sleep in a warm bed at night.
The tutor came three days later. Our greeting was rushed, and she thoroughly taught me etiquette and culture.
In some cases, she was a strict tutor who would relentlessly whip me.
I was taught how to read simple things by my late mother, and when I returned the textbook that the tutor had given me to learn simple spelling, I said, “I can read and write. I can recite poems a little. I will learn etiquette, but you might have forgotten that I don’t have much time. I can’t dance, and I don’t know anything about music. Based on this, I would like to ask for guidance… I don’t mind being whipped as many times as you want if I can be a perfect lady.”
My life would be over if I can’t become a perfect lady.
It would be my downfall, and that man would be pleased.
Therefore, I was desperate.
I studied frantically and learnt etiquette and culture.
It was a month later that I first met my marriage partner.
My marriage partner was the one who wanted to meet, and that man consented because I learnt enough about etiquette and culture not to be embarrassing in public.
However, the fact may be that he couldn’t go against someone of higher standing.
That man had my marriage partner invest in his business in exchange for one of his two daughters, and he chose me without hesitation. His beloved daughter wouldn’t be the one who would be held hostage, the detestable girl would be.
Of course, I remember that day… the day when I first met Orpheus more vividly than when I was ordered to marry him.
That day was also a cold afternoon.
However, the weather was good, unlike a month ago. There were no clouds in the sky, and the bright sunlight shone in the parlour.
That man had said that my marriage partner not only had money, but was also good-looking, and he was undoubtedly right.
Earl Rosenberg, Orpheus Diderik von Rosenbery is a handsome young man with black hair and blue eyes, and he had a melancholy aura.
“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Earl Rosenberg.”
“Call me Orpheus. Please let me call you Ophelia, too.” He smiled lightly and replied in a friendly way when I greeted him while admiring his handsome appearance.
“Then, I’ll do that,” I answered and felt somewhat uncomfortable.
If I look closely at Orpheus’s smile, I could see that it didn’t reach his eyes.
His mouth was drawn in a bewitching arc, but his blue eyes were cold. He shot an icy glance, which was appropriate for his eye colour, my way.
I couldn’t feel any goodwill coming from him, and his eyes made me feel the complete opposite of that.
――― What is he not satisfied with?
That man told me to stay silent about being a prostitute’s daughter. So, he probably hadn’t told Earl Rosenberg either.
The reason why I’m disliked is probably not because of that.
Is it my impression? Or appearance? Or perhaps both?
I’m not a beauty.
I prepared myself to some extent, but I felt horribly miserable when I actually saw him look at me like this.
I don’t care if the servants of the house hate me, but it was different when it came to my future husband.
I pulled back my stiff smile so that he wouldn’t hate me more, and stood still while that man and Orpheus talked.
Then, when it felt like an infinity had passed, Orpheus said, “Could I talk with your daughter alone?”
“Ah… I don’t mind… What about you, Ophelia?”
“Can you have a proper conversation?” ――― That man glared at me and said. Honestly, I was worried about being alone with Earl Rosenberg, but I can’t refuse. “It’s fine,” I nodded, and that man walked passed me. He whispered in my ear, “Don’t say anything unnecessary,” before leaving.
“He’s a stern father.”
Orpheus smiled wryly.
“Did you hear him?” I asked, and he replied, “My ears are good.”
“Most importantly, your father’s voice is a bit too loud.”
“ I’m very sorry for showing you something ugly.”
“Don’t worry about it. Your father is probably just worried about you.”
I sincerely thought that it was good that my head was facing down since I couldn’t maintain the smile on my face.
That man was worried about something else, but I endured this because I would be in trouble if this marriage fell through. I smiled again and lifted my face.
Our conversation continued.
He had excellent conversational skills, and he was also a good listener.
I was weary because he had asked a lot of personal questions, but I had already prepared the answers in advance, so I couldn’t accidentally slip up.
“By the way, I have something to tell you,” Orpheus abruptly said when the conversation came to a pause.
What is it? I corrected my posture, and he began talking seriously, “You may have heard about this from your father, but I have a cousin. She’s 23 years old now, but she has been living with me for six years because she’s blind and has no other relatives.”
Of course, I haven’t heard about this.
All he told me was the bare minimum, which was that Orpheus was rich and good-looking. That man didn’t tell me his age or position in court.
“She told me that she was going to leave the mansion when I told her that I was getting married. She said that you might hate her. However, it took six years before she was finally able to move around a room by herself. If she moves to a new environment, then she would have to start all over again. If she doesn’t have a chaperone, then she will live a crippled life where she can’t do anything.”
I finally saw where he was going with this.
Orpheus wants me to let his cousin stay in the mansion after we get married.
He wants me to accept the presence of his cousin, who has an impairment and has no other relatives.
“Six years ago. Did it have to do with the epidemic?” I asked after thinking a little, and Orpheus nodded.
“Yes. She lost her parents to the epidemic, and she managed to survive even though she had suffered from it as well. But, she lost her sight. She had a fiancé at that time, but it was cancelled…”
――― Then, why don’t you marry that cousin of yours?
I thought but didn’t say out loud.
He might not want to marry her out of sympathy when there is no love involved. Or, he might have preferred to get married to a daughter from a distinguished family instead of a woman with no backing, because it came with benefits.
It was callous, but I heard noble marriages were like this.
For them, love is something they can enjoy after marriage.
And, I had no right to refuse this marriage even if Orpheus loved another woman.
I was that man’s tool, and I had no choice but to obey his order.
“I’m sorry to hear about that,” instead, common words came out of my mouth, but I also meant half of it.
Six years ago, a raging epidemic took the lives of many people, regardless of their rank. My mother was also one of the victims.
However, the pain and sadness that Orpheus’s cousin received when she lost her family, her eyesight and got abandoned by her fiancée, was far worse than mine.
I sympathised with her even though I hadn’t met her yet, and I didn’t want her to experience more pain than she already had.
“Please continue to let her stay in your mansion. She doesn’t have to worry about me.”
“Do you really not mind?”
Orpheus’s gaze softened when I nodded, and he said, “Thanks.”
“I’m lucky to be able to marry a kind woman like you. I’m so glad to have met you.”
Those were probably common honeyed words.
Still, I was so happy to hear them that my cheeks turned red.
I felt that this was the first time someone other than mother had accepted my existence, and I was filled with joy.
“I feel the same way.”
I looked straight into Orpheus’s blue eyes and admired his beauty again.
His snow white face was really handsome, and I stared at it too intensely, and… that was when I knew.
The swirling blackness deep in his cold eyes.
A feeling which was close to depression and resentment, which was a characteristic of those who had suffered enough pain to distort their character.
At that moment, I realised.
That Orpheus was the same kind of person as me.
He went through a dark past like I had and made it to today.
――― I see. So it’s not just me?
A strange impulse welled up within me.
They were feelings that I couldn’t understand nor put into words. It was like I missed something, or want to hug him, or refuse and reject him as much as I could.
When I noticed this, I said to control my inner turmoil, “I’m the same as you. I’m delighted to meet you, Earl Rosenberg.”
I curtsied slowly and thought that I wouldn’t mind marrying this person.
I thought that we would understand each other.
I still clearly remember the day when my marriage was decided.
It was a freezing afternoon.
“Master is calling you. He has something to talk to you about.” A voice called out to me from behind me as I was sweeping the fallen leaves that were blown by the fierce northern wind, and I turned back.
There stood a servant boy of the same age as me, and he glared at me in disappointment. Why do I have to do something like this? ――― This was written on the boy’s face. He got even more annoyed when I just stood there without replying.
“Are you listening? If you are, then answer. Simpleton.”
I became even more speechless when I was attacked with cold scorn.
Idiot, blockhead, useless, and simpleton. ――― Endless abuse gets hurled my way. My heart still felt like it was being gouged out even if I was used to the pain. My heart, which was flowing with blood, chilled, and I felt as if it had frozen over.
I froze while gripping the broom handle.
The hard feeling of the handle brought me back, and I felt like I was even being rejected by inorganic matter.
The boy lost his temper at not receiving a reply from me no matter how long he stood there. He said over his shoulders, “Hurry up and go,” before leaving.
I watched as the dead leaves chased after him with a rustle, and lamented that I had to sweep again.
――― It won’t become clean no matter how much I swept.
I fixed my hood, raised my face and saw the grey and cloudy winter sky. It looked like it would rain at any time.
The fallen leaves stick to the ground when it rains, and it becomes difficult to sweep. I wanted to finish cleaning right away, but even a simpleton like me understood that the Master’s order had priority.
I gave up, put the broom and dustpan away and went to where the Master was.
“You’re slow.” I was struck with this comment as soon as I entered his study and bowed my head in apology.
I saw a middle-aged man standing at the window that was the only light source of this dim room when I raised my face. He frowned as if he was looking at something disgusting.
In contrast to me, the man was wearing a luxurious velvet jacket with a silk shirt with lots of lace underneath.
His pants and shoes were also first-class goods. However, the delicate buttons on his shirt looked as if they would flip off at any moment because he was fat.
His face was round and made it seem like his handsome face from his youth was a lie. His cheeks and chin were full of fat.
The only thing that hadn’t changed was his vibrant blonde hair. That day, he had it combed to the back of his head so that it wouldn’t become dishevelled.
――― A pig in noble clothes.
In those days, I called him this; an ugly and greedy pig with no grace.
The man’s name is Rudolph Heinz von Lagerfeld.
A noble with the rank of Marquis, even though he was mostly ruined, and the master of this mansion.
At the same time, he was my master and father.
I was a child born between this man and my mother, who was a prostitute, and I was taken to this man’s home six years ago when my mother passed away because of an epidemic disease.
“What do you want to talk to me about?” I asked while overlooking his black and dirty hands, and he replied by clicking his tongue.
What he didn’t like was probably my very existence.
I think it’s funny.
It was all this man’s fault that I exist and looked dirty.
“Stop acting like a servant. You’ll be trained in etiquette and culture from tomorrow.”
“What is the meaning of this?” I asked.
The man twisted his face in disgust.
“It means that you’ll be treated as my daughter.”
What are you saying now?
I was insulted as a prostitute’s daughter and as a greedy girl. You worked me hard and told me that if I wanted to stay in this house, then I had to work as a servant.
You worked me until my back started hurting, took away my meals if I slacked off by finding fault in me and threw me in the cold.
And yet, why are you saying such a thing now…?
“What’s with that look? The extremely greedy you is going to be treated as a noble’s daughter, you know? What don’t you like? You should be grateful and rub your head against the floor.”
I couldn’t look him straight in the face as he laughed unpleasantly, so I looked down.
I slowly kneeled down, put my hands on the floor, and lowered my head while grovelling.
The floor was cold and froze my heart.
At that time, I didn’t just feel the pain that I was used to, I also knew that this was humiliation. So, I didn’t resist.
It was better to throw away what little pride I had instead of opposing him and getting hit.
“Why…”
“What?” He asked, probably because it was hard to hear me while I was grovelling.
I slowly lifted my face, sat down on the floor and asked again, “Would you tell me why?”
“I’m going to use you as a pawn. I’ll marry you off.”
“Marry?”
“Yes. Rejoice. Your partner is a young nobleman. He doesn’t just have money, he’s also good-looking. He’s a waste on someone like you with a low rank.”
I had no choice but to doubt my ears. I was dumbfounded and muttered, “Why me?”
This man had another daughter who was turning 16 this year. She was a lady who was raised carefully like a princess; she was a genuine noble’s daughter.
Wouldn’t it be better to marry off that girl instead of me, who is of low birth and hadn’t been educated?
“Idiot, there’s only you. Victoria is the heir to the Lagerfeld House. She won’t be getting married into another house. We will adopt her husband.”
I remembered something important when I saw that he wasn’t going to stop laughing.
This man wasn’t satisfied if he didn’t make me unhappy.
In place of my mother, he wants to make me, his daughter, unhappy.
That was why he took me in as an orphan.
『Come to my house, Ophelia. Let’s live together.』
He extended his hand to me with a smile on his face, and yet, as soon as we arrived at the mansion, he slapped my palm away.
『You will be punished in place of your traitor mother.』
He severely abused me, worked me to the bone and beat me up whenever he was in a bad mood.
The servants understood what he wanted and banded together to oppress me. They vented their dissatisfaction on me.
『I won’t let you be happy. I’ll make you suffer more than I have.』
The man mother loved wasn’t here anymore.
There was only a pitiful and ugly man, who wasn’t able to carry out his feelings and was distorted by his despair.
And that wasn’t my father.
We may be connected by blood, but he wasn’t my father.
“You’ll be trained for two months. I’ll arrange a tutor, so become the perfect lady. You’re worthless if you can’t do this. You can go do the same job as your mother or enter the monastery.”
I’m sure this marriage wasn’t a normal marriage. There must be a catch because the other party’s conditions are good.
My heart was filled with anger as if it were being gouged out.
My heart won’t freeze if I don’t do, and I won’t feel sad. But, I do feel as if I have been abandoned.
“I took someone like you in with no compensation, and let you stay in this house. I gave you clothes to wear and food to eat. Return the favour,” the man finished speaking and waved his hand to tell me to get out.
“I get angry looking at that face that looks like your mother’s. Good grief, I would have loved you if you hadn’t looked like her.”
I stood up, bowed and headed to the door.
I tried not to see what expression he was making. It didn’t matter whether he was glaring or sneering.
I walked quickly through the dim corridor.
The head maid will triumphantly reprimand me if I don’t get back to work quickly. That woman wouldn’t listen even if I told her that I was called by the Master.
――― Ah, but…
I suddenly changed my mind and stopped.
That man told me to stop acting like a servant. It was a joke that he omitted the fact that he was working me to the bone and instead called it acting, but I had no choice but to obey him.
I don’t have to wear tattered clothes, and I don’t have to worry about sweeping the fallen leaves even if I see rain.
I will be a lady of the Lagerfeld House from tomorrow.
I was driven by the urge to shout and covered my face with both hands.
“I won’t be unhappy.”
This is his mansion. So, I have to obey his orders while I’m in this mansion.
I will aim to become the perfect lady, and if I can’t, then I will do what that man wants and become a prostitute or a nun.
But, it will be different once I’m out of this mansion.
“I won’t be unhappy,” I swore.
I smelt dry dirt from the hand which was holding the broken umbrella.
I was given a decent room instead of the storage from the day I was ordered to get married and wore a dress instead of the tattered servant clothes.
This navy and grey dress was remarkably plain when compared to the dresses that his daughter, Victoria, wore, and was something that a widow would wear, but it was much more comfortable than the tattered servant clothes.
I was given three meals a day without missing any, and I was able to sleep in a warm bed at night.
The tutor came three days later. Our greeting was rushed, and she thoroughly taught me etiquette and culture.
In some cases, she was a strict tutor who would relentlessly whip me.
I was taught how to read simple things by my late mother, and when I returned the textbook that the tutor had given me to learn simple spelling, I said, “I can read and write. I can recite poems a little. I will learn etiquette, but you might have forgotten that I don’t have much time. I can’t dance, and I don’t know anything about music. Based on this, I would like to ask for guidance… I don’t mind being whipped as many times as you want if I can be a perfect lady.”
My life would be over if I can’t become a perfect lady.
It would be my downfall, and that man would be pleased.
Therefore, I was desperate.
I studied frantically and learnt etiquette and culture.
It was a month later that I first met my marriage partner.
My marriage partner was the one who wanted to meet, and that man consented because I learnt enough about etiquette and culture not to be embarrassing in public.
However, the fact may be that he couldn’t go against someone of higher standing.
That man had my marriage partner invest in his business in exchange for one of his two daughters, and he chose me without hesitation. His beloved daughter wouldn’t be the one who would be held hostage, the detestable girl would be.
Of course, I remember that day… the day when I first met Orpheus more vividly than when I was ordered to marry him.
That day was also a cold afternoon.
However, the weather was good, unlike a month ago. There were no clouds in the sky, and the bright sunlight shone in the parlour.
That man had said that my marriage partner not only had money, but was also good-looking, and he was undoubtedly right.
Earl Rosenberg, Orpheus Diderik von Rosenbery is a handsome young man with black hair and blue eyes, and he had a melancholy aura.
“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Earl Rosenberg.”
“Call me Orpheus. Please let me call you Ophelia, too.” He smiled lightly and replied in a friendly way when I greeted him while admiring his handsome appearance.
“Then, I’ll do that,” I answered and felt somewhat uncomfortable.
If I look closely at Orpheus’s smile, I could see that it didn’t reach his eyes.
His mouth was drawn in a bewitching arc, but his blue eyes were cold. He shot an icy glance, which was appropriate for his eye colour, my way.
I couldn’t feel any goodwill coming from him, and his eyes made me feel the complete opposite of that.
――― What is he not satisfied with?
That man told me to stay silent about being a prostitute’s daughter. So, he probably hadn’t told Earl Rosenberg either.
The reason why I’m disliked is probably not because of that.
Is it my impression? Or appearance? Or perhaps both?
I’m not a beauty.
I prepared myself to some extent, but I felt horribly miserable when I actually saw him look at me like this.
I don’t care if the servants of the house hate me, but it was different when it came to my future husband.
I pulled back my stiff smile so that he wouldn’t hate me more, and stood still while that man and Orpheus talked.
Then, when it felt like an infinity had passed, Orpheus said, “Could I talk with your daughter alone?”
“Ah… I don’t mind… What about you, Ophelia?”
“Can you have a proper conversation?” ――― That man glared at me and said. Honestly, I was worried about being alone with Earl Rosenberg, but I can’t refuse. “It’s fine,” I nodded, and that man walked passed me. He whispered in my ear, “Don’t say anything unnecessary,” before leaving.
“He’s a stern father.”
Orpheus smiled wryly.
“Did you hear him?” I asked, and he replied, “My ears are good.”
“Most importantly, your father’s voice is a bit too loud.”
“ I’m very sorry for showing you something ugly.”
“Don’t worry about it. Your father is probably just worried about you.”
I sincerely thought that it was good that my head was facing down since I couldn’t maintain the smile on my face.
That man was worried about something else, but I endured this because I would be in trouble if this marriage fell through. I smiled again and lifted my face.
Our conversation continued.
He had excellent conversational skills, and he was also a good listener.
I was weary because he had asked a lot of personal questions, but I had already prepared the answers in advance, so I couldn’t accidentally slip up.
“By the way, I have something to tell you,” Orpheus abruptly said when the conversation came to a pause.
What is it? I corrected my posture, and he began talking seriously, “You may have heard about this from your father, but I have a cousin. She’s 23 years old now, but she has been living with me for six years because she’s blind and has no other relatives.”
Of course, I haven’t heard about this.
All he told me was the bare minimum, which was that Orpheus was rich and good-looking. That man didn’t tell me his age or position in court.
“She told me that she was going to leave the mansion when I told her that I was getting married. She said that you might hate her. However, it took six years before she was finally able to move around a room by herself. If she moves to a new environment, then she would have to start all over again. If she doesn’t have a chaperone, then she will live a crippled life where she can’t do anything.”
I finally saw where he was going with this.
Orpheus wants me to let his cousin stay in the mansion after we get married.
He wants me to accept the presence of his cousin, who has an impairment and has no other relatives.
“Six years ago. Did it have to do with the epidemic?” I asked after thinking a little, and Orpheus nodded.
“Yes. She lost her parents to the epidemic, and she managed to survive even though she had suffered from it as well. But, she lost her sight. She had a fiancé at that time, but it was cancelled…”
――― Then, why don’t you marry that cousin of yours?
I thought but didn’t say out loud.
He might not want to marry her out of sympathy when there is no love involved. Or, he might have preferred to get married to a daughter from a distinguished family instead of a woman with no backing, because it came with benefits.
It was callous, but I heard noble marriages were like this.
For them, love is something they can enjoy after marriage.
And, I had no right to refuse this marriage even if Orpheus loved another woman.
I was that man’s tool, and I had no choice but to obey his order.
“I’m sorry to hear about that,” instead, common words came out of my mouth, but I also meant half of it.
Six years ago, a raging epidemic took the lives of many people, regardless of their rank. My mother was also one of the victims.
However, the pain and sadness that Orpheus’s cousin received when she lost her family, her eyesight and got abandoned by her fiancée, was far worse than mine.
I sympathised with her even though I hadn’t met her yet, and I didn’t want her to experience more pain than she already had.
“Please continue to let her stay in your mansion. She doesn’t have to worry about me.”
“Do you really not mind?”
Orpheus’s gaze softened when I nodded, and he said, “Thanks.”
“I’m lucky to be able to marry a kind woman like you. I’m so glad to have met you.”
Those were probably common honeyed words.
Still, I was so happy to hear them that my cheeks turned red.
I felt that this was the first time someone other than mother had accepted my existence, and I was filled with joy.
“I feel the same way.”
I looked straight into Orpheus’s blue eyes and admired his beauty again.
His snow white face was really handsome, and I stared at it too intensely, and… that was when I knew.
The swirling blackness deep in his cold eyes.
A feeling which was close to depression and resentment, which was a characteristic of those who had suffered enough pain to distort their character.
At that moment, I realised.
That Orpheus was the same kind of person as me.
He went through a dark past like I had and made it to today.
――― I see. So it’s not just me?
A strange impulse welled up within me.
They were feelings that I couldn’t understand nor put into words. It was like I missed something, or want to hug him, or refuse and reject him as much as I could.
When I noticed this, I said to control my inner turmoil, “I’m the same as you. I’m delighted to meet you, Earl Rosenberg.”
I curtsied slowly and thought that I wouldn’t mind marrying this person.
I thought that we would understand each other.
