Chapter 28
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It's 9 am in the morning. My laptop still turnt on, on my bed and the prescription bottle by my leg. My rooms filled with darkness ( when is it not) my head's spinning, it feels like i just came from a party last night and had 7 shots. I glance at the bottle i took from lola's room. I remember when i couldn't go a day without taking a pill. Not advil or something but hard stuff. Club drugs, xan's you name it. I was lost and in pain, i was also stupid enough to think that downing pills 24/7 would fix something. I remember the nights not being able to move because i was short on money not able to get a fix. When i didn't see the light, and not one bit of it... Daisy was right there clearing up the darkness. But guess what... She left, and it's been 3 months now. No text, no call, no nothing. Maybe i like it that way. Maybe i'm doing just fine without her.
I hear noise downstairs, dad probably stumbling in from work last night. I take my time, not rushing to go check on him and make sure it even is him in the first place. My hands are hot and moist as they touch my face. I never knew how much stress can actually affect a person. 10 minutes later , i make my way out of bed and slowly down the steps. My eyes began to squint because of how bright it is in the kitchen. Rubbing my eyes , i expect to hear dad say something to attempt to check up on me.
I open my eyes fully.
''Hey sweetie!'' mom says as she sits her cup of coffee down walking toward me with open arms. My body feels nothing but shock. Why is she here? Why now?
''Well don't just stand there. Give momma a hug!'' she says, wrapping her arms around me while resting her head on my shoulder. Still in shock, my body responds late. I look for dad, to see if he's seeing this and if he's just as shocked as me. Once my eyes meet his, he begins to smile as if he's happy about what he's seeing. She looks as me sharply. Probably in response of me not hugging her back.
''What are you doing here''? i say, moving away from her grip. Why was i so angry at her? She didn't do anything wrong to me, she never has. But yet i can't stand the sight of her.
She looks saddened by my response, dropping her head
''Well i just thought i'd swing by... i was in town for an interview and right down the street so I-'' i cut her off abruptly.
''So it takes a job interview to make u want to see your son. The one you haven't seen in years... The one you left!'' i say raising my voice at her. She dosen't have the right to come in and barge in our lives like she never ever left us.
'' Now Scottie, i understand your hurt but that's still your mother.'' dad jumps in.
The anger inside of me boils and til the point where i can't control it anymore.
''Are you serious?! Your standing up for her!? The very woman that left u heartbroken and that left me to pick up the pieces!'' i say getting louder and louder.
''It's ok i'll just leave. Im sorry to cause such a fuss.'' mom says grabbing her coat and purse.
''No dont go. He's just being a little boy!'' dad shouts at me.
'' I'm done. Im done trying to help u stop drinking your life away and im done missing you mom! I'm leaving.'' i say not sure were im gonna even go. I expect one of them to stop me but none of them do. They watch as i storm out, not caring where im going which shatters my heart even more.
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It's 9 am in the morning. My laptop still turnt on, on my bed and the prescription bottle by my leg. My rooms filled with darkness ( when is it not) my head's spinning, it feels like i just came from a party last night and had 7 shots. I glance at the bottle i took from lola's room. I remember when i couldn't go a day without taking a pill. Not advil or something but hard stuff. Club drugs, xan's you name it. I was lost and in pain, i was also stupid enough to think that downing pills 24/7 would fix something. I remember the nights not being able to move because i was short on money not able to get a fix. When i didn't see the light, and not one bit of it... Daisy was right there clearing up the darkness. But guess what... She left, and it's been 3 months now. No text, no call, no nothing. Maybe i like it that way. Maybe i'm doing just fine without her.
I hear noise downstairs, dad probably stumbling in from work last night. I take my time, not rushing to go check on him and make sure it even is him in the first place. My hands are hot and moist as they touch my face. I never knew how much stress can actually affect a person. 10 minutes later , i make my way out of bed and slowly down the steps. My eyes began to squint because of how bright it is in the kitchen. Rubbing my eyes , i expect to hear dad say something to attempt to check up on me.
I open my eyes fully.
''Hey sweetie!'' mom says as she sits her cup of coffee down walking toward me with open arms. My body feels nothing but shock. Why is she here? Why now?
''Well don't just stand there. Give momma a hug!'' she says, wrapping her arms around me while resting her head on my shoulder. Still in shock, my body responds late. I look for dad, to see if he's seeing this and if he's just as shocked as me. Once my eyes meet his, he begins to smile as if he's happy about what he's seeing. She looks as me sharply. Probably in response of me not hugging her back.
''What are you doing here''? i say, moving away from her grip. Why was i so angry at her? She didn't do anything wrong to me, she never has. But yet i can't stand the sight of her.
She looks saddened by my response, dropping her head
''Well i just thought i'd swing by... i was in town for an interview and right down the street so I-'' i cut her off abruptly.
''So it takes a job interview to make u want to see your son. The one you haven't seen in years... The one you left!'' i say raising my voice at her. She dosen't have the right to come in and barge in our lives like she never ever left us.
'' Now Scottie, i understand your hurt but that's still your mother.'' dad jumps in.
The anger inside of me boils and til the point where i can't control it anymore.
''Are you serious?! Your standing up for her!? The very woman that left u heartbroken and that left me to pick up the pieces!'' i say getting louder and louder.
''It's ok i'll just leave. Im sorry to cause such a fuss.'' mom says grabbing her coat and purse.
''No dont go. He's just being a little boy!'' dad shouts at me.
'' I'm done. Im done trying to help u stop drinking your life away and im done missing you mom! I'm leaving.'' i say not sure were im gonna even go. I expect one of them to stop me but none of them do. They watch as i storm out, not caring where im going which shatters my heart even more.
It's 9 am in the morning. My laptop still turnt on, on my bed and the prescription bottle by my leg. My rooms filled with darkness when is it not my head's spinning, it feels like i just came from a party last night and had 7 shots. I glance at the bottle i took from lola's room. I remember when i couldn't go a day without taking a pill. Not advil or something but hard stuff. Club drugs, xan's you name it. I was lost and in pain, i was also stupid enough to think that downing pills 24/7 would fix something. I remember the nights not being able to move because i was short on money not able to get a fix. When i didn't see the light, and not one bit of it... Daisy was right there clearing up the darkness. But guess what... She left, and it's been 3 months now. No text, no call, no nothing. Maybe i like it that way. Maybe i'm doing just fine without her.I hear noise downstairs, dad probably stumbling in from work last night. I take my time, not rushing to go check on him and make sure it even is him in the first place. My hands are hot and moist as they touch my face. I never knew how much stress can actually affect a person. 10 minutes later , i make my way out of bed and slowly down the steps. My eyes began to squint because of how bright it is in the kitchen. Rubbing my eyes , i expect to hear dad say something to attempt to check up on me.I open my eyes fully.''Hey sweetie!'' mom says as she sits her cup of coffee down walking toward me with open arms. My body feels nothing but shock. Why is she here? Why now?''Well don't just stand there. Give momma a hug!'' she says, wrapping her arms around me while resting her head on my shoulder. Still in shock, my body responds late. I look for dad, to see if he's seeing this and if he's just as shocked as me. Once my eyes meet his, he begins to smile as if he's happy about what he's seeing. She looks as me sharply. Probably in response of me not hugging her back.''What are you doing here''? i say, moving away from her grip. Why was i so angry at her? She didn't do anything wrong to me, she never has. But yet i can't stand the sight of her.She looks saddened by my response, dropping her head''Well i just thought i'd swing by... i was in town for an interview and right down the street so I-'' i cut her off abruptly.''So it takes a job interview to make u want to see your son. The one you haven't seen in years... The one you left!'' i say raising my voice at her. She dosen't have the right to come in and barge in our lives like she never ever left us.'' Now Scottie, i understand your hurt but that's still your mother.'' dad jumps in.The anger inside of me boils and til the point where i can't control it anymore.''Are you serious?! Your standing up for her!? The very woman that left u heartbroken and that left me to pick up the pieces!'' i say getting louder and louder.''It's ok i'll just leave. Im sorry to cause such a fuss.'' mom says grabbing her coat and purse.''No dont go. He's just being a little boy!'' dad shouts at me.'' I'm done. Im done trying to help u stop drinking your life away and im done missing you mom! I'm leaving.'' i say not sure were im gonna even go. I expect one of them to stop me but none of them do. They watch as i storm out, not caring where im going which shatters my heart even more.
