Chapter 15
Committing Suicide
Murong Shu Qing who continued to lie down among the flowers, still did not have time to enjoy lying down alone in the hidden flowers, under the night beautiful stars, one shadow already enveloped her body: “Who is he?”
Looking at Xuanyuan Yi who was lying down just like her, Murong Shu Qing lightly sighed, they were really two types of people, and who could reveal two kinds of bearings also. If she said that Qin Xiu Zhi had an elegant and impressive style, casual and free. So this Xuanyuan Yi was exactly a cruel, untamed and arrogant person. Similarly, this kind of lying down on the cluster of flowers at will, Qin Xiu Zhi was aesthetically gentle, and this delicate flowers tree appeared to blend with him together. Xuanyuan Yi was aggressive and cold, how could these flowers tree cover up his points.
Not paying attention to even look at Xuanyuan Yi, she raised her head to admire the stars, and said: “I am not familiar (with him)!”
Suddenly, Murong Shu Qing felt that the top of her neck was slightly in pain, Xuanyuan Yi already pulled down the black jade leaf necklace that was always on her, and he was playing with it in his hand. Looking down on her body, he kept close to Murong Shu Qing’s ear, and said with a muffled and charm voice: “How can you like giving things away? In the future, you only allow to give something to me!”
The tip of her nose faintly smelled alcohol, Xuanyuan Yi’s breath was heated up, and the voice sounded muffled and hoarse, his speech was confuse and overbearing. It made Murong Shu Qing’s heart was like fluctuating lake, she felt that her own breath became somewhat unstable gradually. Murong Shu Qing frowned and sighed secretly, the moonlight was too beautiful, it was surely a kind of mistake. Whether or not this time, with a high chanting, the moon was the reason to cause a disaster.
Wishing to sing this lyrics, Murong Shu Qing suddenly felt very funny, the original charming and ambiguous atmospheres were destroyed when she heard her laughing voice. Slightly moving forwards to be a little more apart from him, she smilingly said: “Have you ever heard from other people that you are very overbearing.”
Looking at Murong Shu Qing who moved further away, Xuanyuan Yi did not make things difficult for her either, and conveniently lied down, just liked Murong Shu Qing. Peacefully lying down to appreciate the moonlight that was clear with many stars, his mouth lazily replied: “You are not the first one (who said that he’s overbearing), you will not be the last person either.”
The two people did not say anything anymore, quietly appreciating the scenery of this summer night, the fragrance of flowers and the song of cicadas, the cool breeze with a bright moon as their company.
“Miss, Miss.” A somewhat urgent voice of a woman came through from the courtyard unhurriedly.
Getting up to look at Lu Yi who was hurriedly walking towards her, Murong Shu Qing lightly patted off the petals from her skirt, and she asked: “Lu Yi, what is happening?”
Looking at Murong Shu Qing, Lu Yi felt that her heart was settled by a lot, helping her to get rid of the petals that were on her hair, she said: “The family’s guard just came to report a moment ago, that Miss Wan Ru cut her wrist (to try to kill herself) this afternoon, fortunately, Madam Yun discovered it early, it should not be too dangerous now.”
Cutting her wrist? Recalling that woman who was covered with bruises, had pale complexion, and her head that was always bowed down and shaking, Murong Shu Qing lightly sighed: “Let us return and take a look.”
*****
Inside the Chu Yun pavilion, there was only Yun Pei Hua and Xiao Chan who were accompanying Murong Wan Ru. The room only had three small lanterns, but it was not too dark either. Murong Shu Qing entered the room, then she waved her hand to them: “You all go out, ok!”
The two people were concerned and looking one glance at that person who cut her wrist this afternoon and had not said anything, their eyes did not completely look at Murong Wan Ru, it appeared that they did not have any capability to bring up anything that they wanted to say to her. Without any better option, they slowly withdrew from Chu Yun pavilion. Lu Yi who was behind them, quietly closed the door, and she also retreated out.
Murong Shu Qing entered the bedroom, but had not looked at Murong Wan Ru who was on the bed. She just walked straight to the front of the window, and lightly pushed the window open. In a flash, a water like shiny full moon filled the room.
“How many people seek to be alive, why do you seek death?” Murong Shu Qing’s light voice seemed to be ethereal and distant under the moonlight.
For a very long time, the person who had not moved for several shichen, lightly moved, but that beautiful eyes lost her spirit and her eyes were watching attentively at the moon that was on the top of the window, the woman lightly sighed. The moonlight just liked water, it was clear and cold for her and wrapped her around like a hazy ribbon, that was just unreal.
Murong Wan Ru regained her line of sight to look at the wound on her hand that was wrapped up properly, also that old wounds, with intense sadness, she said: “I am already weary with these kind of days, as far as I am concern, being alive is only to suffer (more hardships). Maybe dying will make me feel free.”
Murong Shu Qing turned around, and picked up the tea that was on the table and somewhat cold, she gave one cup to both Murong Wan Ru and herself, came to the front of the bed, and handed it over to her hand. Then she lied down on the chair that was next to the bed, she asked: “Do you know why this long dan tea is especially rich and mellow (in flavors)?
Murong Wan Ru looked at the tea that was on her own hand, she did not know how to reply, and could finally say: “I do not know!”
“Have you seen the ice in a far away place, the silver and plain scenery?”
“I have not.”
“Have you heard the raging waves that beat against the shore, as if the sound of a sea wave with a ten thousand stampeding horses?”
“I have not.”
“Do you want to see it, do you want to hear it?”
She had not seen the outside world, her sky was that small block all along, her sullen and bright eyes showed a light surprise: “I ~~~, they are way too far away from me.”
Murong Shu Qing slowly and firmly said: “From here to Jin Zhou tea’s garden, it only needs 10 days, to get to the snowy mountain at the Lin Feng Guan, it only needs one month, to get to Dong Hai, it only needs 20 days, these (distances) are not too far away like you have thought. This world is not as small as you think it is either.”
“But I am already a married woman, I am not able to run away.”
Murong Shu Qing said smilingly: “If you are not afraid (to run away), it will be fine!”
“What do you mean?!” Murong Wan Ru glared with her big eyes, her original pale and stupefied face looked extremely and amazingly lively. She had an unbelievable looked at Murong Shu Qing.
She appeared to have been stimulated excessively, also, towards a person who had accepted men as superior to women since she was a child, a woman who was taught to be faithful unto death, this was really an extremely outrageous suggestion. Putting down the tea that was on her hand, Murong Shu Qing sighed and said: “Since you have already come back, just stay at home for about a year, I will let you see the family’s mountains and great rivers within this Dong Yu’s country. At that future time, you come here again to tell me your answer.”
“But the Li’s family ~~”
“You did not need to be worry about this, just do what you want to do on your own! Before then, do not do any foolish thing.”
“Zhong Wen, he ~~” He was already her husband after all, they had been married together for four years, he should be her husband throughout her life, but he actually the person who gave her the most and deepest sorrows.
A person throughout one’s life, one should experience it on one’s own, with one’s own view, one own’s feeling, one’s own place, this world did not give any woman these things. It only taught them to obey. In love, the world of a family was even more like this, if one did not have him, then that meant that one did not have everything.
In Murong Shu Qing’s (point of view), love was an important part of one’s life, but it should not be one’s whole life. Even though it was faithful to the end, but the rigid faithfulness of love, also did not require each other’s life or death, this was the only reason why that person already planted this point of view deeply in one’s heart.
“This period of time, you can also think about you and him, what do you want to do, can he or can he not give you (what you want).” Finished speaking, and did not wait until she replied, Murong Shu Qing already stepped out of Chu Yun pavilion.
Looking at Murong Shu Qing who went freely and at ease, and she was already disappeared in the hazy night scene. It seemed that what mother told her that the family had changed these days, was indeed true, and she was not the previous Murong Shu Qing.
Then what did she want for her own (life)? Marrying him was her parents’s order, and the matchmaker’s words. Working hard to be a good wife, was a woman’s duty, how about her? What did she want! The cold tea that was on her hand, it did not have any alluring fragrant smell at all, there was only a biter and astringent flavor that was difficult to say.
Chapter 15
Committing Suicide
Murong Shu Qing who continued to lie down among the flowers, still did not have time to enjoy lying down alone in the hidden flowers, under the night beautiful stars, one shadow already enveloped her body: “Who is he?”
Looking at Xuanyuan Yi who was lying down just like her, Murong Shu Qing lightly sighed, they were really two types of people, and who could reveal two kinds of bearings also. If she said that Qin Xiu Zhi had an elegant and impressive style, casual and free. So this Xuanyuan Yi was exactly a cruel, untamed and arrogant person. Similarly, this kind of lying down on the cluster of flowers at will, Qin Xiu Zhi was aesthetically gentle, and this delicate flowers tree appeared to blend with him together. Xuanyuan Yi was aggressive and cold, how could these flowers tree cover up his points.
Not paying attention to even look at Xuanyuan Yi, she raised her head to admire the stars, and said: “I am not familiar (with him)!”
Suddenly, Murong Shu Qing felt that the top of her neck was slightly in pain, Xuanyuan Yi already pulled down the black jade leaf necklace that was always on her, and he was playing with it in his hand. Looking down on her body, he kept close to Murong Shu Qing’s ear, and said with a muffled and charm voice: “How can you like giving things away? In the future, you only allow to give something to me!”
The tip of her nose faintly smelled alcohol, Xuanyuan Yi’s breath was heated up, and the voice sounded muffled and hoarse, his speech was confuse and overbearing. It made Murong Shu Qing’s heart was like fluctuating lake, she felt that her own breath became somewhat unstable gradually. Murong Shu Qing frowned and sighed secretly, the moonlight was too beautiful, it was surely a kind of mistake. Whether or not this time, with a high chanting, the moon was the reason to cause a disaster.
Wishing to sing this lyrics, Murong Shu Qing suddenly felt very funny, the original charming and ambiguous atmospheres were destroyed when she heard her laughing voice. Slightly moving forwards to be a little more apart from him, she smilingly said: “Have you ever heard from other people that you are very overbearing.”
Looking at Murong Shu Qing who moved further away, Xuanyuan Yi did not make things difficult for her either, and conveniently lied down, just liked Murong Shu Qing. Peacefully lying down to appreciate the moonlight that was clear with many stars, his mouth lazily replied: “You are not the first one (who said that he’s overbearing), you will not be the last person either.”
The two people did not say anything anymore, quietly appreciating the scenery of this summer night, the fragrance of flowers and the song of cicadas, the cool breeze with a bright moon as their company.
“Miss, Miss.” A somewhat urgent voice of a woman came through from the courtyard unhurriedly.
Getting up to look at Lu Yi who was hurriedly walking towards her, Murong Shu Qing lightly patted off the petals from her skirt, and she asked: “Lu Yi, what is happening?”
Looking at Murong Shu Qing, Lu Yi felt that her heart was settled by a lot, helping her to get rid of the petals that were on her hair, she said: “The family’s guard just came to report a moment ago, that Miss Wan Ru cut her wrist (to try to kill herself) this afternoon, fortunately, Madam Yun discovered it early, it should not be too dangerous now.”
Cutting her wrist? Recalling that woman who was covered with bruises, had pale complexion, and her head that was always bowed down and shaking, Murong Shu Qing lightly sighed: “Let us return and take a look.”
*****
Inside the Chu Yun pavilion, there was only Yun Pei Hua and Xiao Chan who were accompanying Murong Wan Ru. The room only had three small lanterns, but it was not too dark either. Murong Shu Qing entered the room, then she waved her hand to them: “You all go out, ok!”
The two people were concerned and looking one glance at that person who cut her wrist this afternoon and had not said anything, their eyes did not completely look at Murong Wan Ru, it appeared that they did not have any capability to bring up anything that they wanted to say to her. Without any better option, they slowly withdrew from Chu Yun pavilion. Lu Yi who was behind them, quietly closed the door, and she also retreated out.
Murong Shu Qing entered the bedroom, but had not looked at Murong Wan Ru who was on the bed. She just walked straight to the front of the window, and lightly pushed the window open. In a flash, a water like shiny full moon filled the room.
“How many people seek to be alive, why do you seek death?” Murong Shu Qing’s light voice seemed to be ethereal and distant under the moonlight.
For a very long time, the person who had not moved for several shichen, lightly moved, but that beautiful eyes lost her spirit and her eyes were watching attentively at the moon that was on the top of the window, the woman lightly sighed. The moonlight just liked water, it was clear and cold for her and wrapped her around like a hazy ribbon, that was just unreal.
Murong Wan Ru regained her line of sight to look at the wound on her hand that was wrapped up properly, also that old wounds, with intense sadness, she said: “I am already weary with these kind of days, as far as I am concern, being alive is only to suffer (more hardships). Maybe dying will make me feel free.”
Murong Shu Qing turned around, and picked up the tea that was on the table and somewhat cold, she gave one cup to both Murong Wan Ru and herself, came to the front of the bed, and handed it over to her hand. Then she lied down on the chair that was next to the bed, she asked: “Do you know why this long dan tea is especially rich and mellow (in flavors)?
Murong Wan Ru looked at the tea that was on her own hand, she did not know how to reply, and could finally say: “I do not know!”
“Have you seen the ice in a far away place, the silver and plain scenery?”
“I have not.”
“Have you heard the raging waves that beat against the shore, as if the sound of a sea wave with a ten thousand stampeding horses?”
“I have not.”
“Do you want to see it, do you want to hear it?”
She had not seen the outside world, her sky was that small block all along, her sullen and bright eyes showed a light surprise: “I ~~~, they are way too far away from me.”
Murong Shu Qing slowly and firmly said: “From here to Jin Zhou tea’s garden, it only needs 10 days, to get to the snowy mountain at the Lin Feng Guan, it only needs one month, to get to Dong Hai, it only needs 20 days, these (distances) are not too far away like you have thought. This world is not as small as you think it is either.”
“But I am already a married woman, I am not able to run away.”
Murong Shu Qing said smilingly: “If you are not afraid (to run away), it will be fine!”
“What do you mean?!” Murong Wan Ru glared with her big eyes, her original pale and stupefied face looked extremely and amazingly lively. She had an unbelievable looked at Murong Shu Qing.
She appeared to have been stimulated excessively, also, towards a person who had accepted men as superior to women since she was a child, a woman who was taught to be faithful unto death, this was really an extremely outrageous suggestion. Putting down the tea that was on her hand, Murong Shu Qing sighed and said: “Since you have already come back, just stay at home for about a year, I will let you see the family’s mountains and great rivers within this Dong Yu’s country. At that future time, you come here again to tell me your answer.”
“But the Li’s family ~~”
“You did not need to be worry about this, just do what you want to do on your own! Before then, do not do any foolish thing.”
“Zhong Wen, he ~~” He was already her husband after all, they had been married together for four years, he should be her husband throughout her life, but he actually the person who gave her the most and deepest sorrows.
A person throughout one’s life, one should experience it on one’s own, with one’s own view, one own’s feeling, one’s own place, this world did not give any woman these things. It only taught them to obey. In love, the world of a family was even more like this, if one did not have him, then that meant that one did not have everything.
In Murong Shu Qing’s (point of view), love was an important part of one’s life, but it should not be one’s whole life. Even though it was faithful to the end, but the rigid faithfulness of love, also did not require each other’s life or death, this was the only reason why that person already planted this point of view deeply in one’s heart.
“This period of time, you can also think about you and him, what do you want to do, can he or can he not give you (what you want).” Finished speaking, and did not wait until she replied, Murong Shu Qing already stepped out of Chu Yun pavilion.
Looking at Murong Shu Qing who went freely and at ease, and she was already disappeared in the hazy night scene. It seemed that what mother told her that the family had changed these days, was indeed true, and she was not the previous Murong Shu Qing.
Then what did she want for her own (life)? Marrying him was her parents’s order, and the matchmaker’s words. Working hard to be a good wife, was a woman’s duty, how about her? What did she want! The cold tea that was on her hand, it did not have any alluring fragrant smell at all, there was only a biter and astringent flavor that was difficult to say.
