Twenty-two years old. He graduated from college, met her and they hit it off.
Twenty-three years old. She became his girlfriend, the two promised to love each other forever and ever.
Twenty-four years old. He quit his job and started his own business.
Twenty-five years old. His business fell and he reached the lowest part of life.
Twenty-five years old. She left him.
Twenty-five years old. He felt that he was unable to hold up his own world.
When she left, she told him. Jiang Li, please forgive me. I am a very realistic person. If you were to blame, blame yourself for being useless.
If you had to blame, blame yourself for being useless.
Jiang Li lifts his head up from all the alcohol and opened his drunk eyes. Looking at the world in front of him, drunk……To blame, blame yourself for being useless.
No one should be obliged to pay for your failures. Even if it is the person you love, they can leave without hesitation. Talking about loving each other forever, these are all nonsense. Nonsense!
Men would speak with his strength.
Jiang Li clenched his fists and staggered into the beautiful yet evil world.
In the dark, as if there was a person talking to him said, “Jiang Li, congratulations. You have successfully reached nirvana.”
……
Twenty-eight years old. Jiang Li’s company was successfully listed.
Twenty-nine years old. Jiang Li no longer need to devote every second to his career. He now has the time to consider his relationships. However, even though it’s been four years now, every time he sees a woman he would feel annoyed. . . . It seems that the impact that woman had left is something that he had underestimated.
So Jiang Li felt that for the rest of his life, he won’t be attracted to women anymore.
Not attracted to women, then he should be attracted to men. Jiang Li casually thought.
Twenty-nine years old, Jiang Li met Xue Yun Feng.
At that time Xue Yun Feng had just broken up with his boyfriend. Under a terrible mood, he met Jiang Li at a gay party. So he grabbed his hand and asked him ‘would you be my boyfriend?’
Sure.
Jiang Li thought anyone to him would be considered the same. It doesn’t matter anymore. Since both parties don’t mind and females make him annoyed whereas males won’t, why not?
Therefore, Jiang Li was more convinced that he is a gay.
He could tell that Xue Yun Feng didn’t actually like him. He was just looking for some company. A relationship with no love was the best for Jiang Li.
And this is how two people came together for half a year already. Of course, in Jiang Li’s eyes, this is a matter which is not fresh nor bland.While it is not necessarily what Xue Yun Feng have in mind. Should Jiang Li realize sooner that Xue Yun Feng from that moment had planted a blooming smile across his face, then perhaps they would not have any future entanglements.
When Xue Yun Feng stood in front of Jiang Li fully naked. . . Jiang Li fled.
Xue Yun Feng doesn’t understand what Jiang Li is thinking. While Jiang Li, he also does not understand himself.
Maybe, maybe I just need to adapt. . . Jiang Li thinks.
But the thought of being with a man. . .
. . . His, his stomach just starts turning.
Jiang Li is very confused, ever since his dark twenty-five years, he has never been this confused. Although Jiang Li doesn’t understand, he is a dedicated person. Since he believed that he is a homosexual, then he should turn himself into a truly gay person…To be honest, even the author has never seen any man so dedicated on wanting to bend their own self.
So Jiang Li finally decided that he needed to adapt.
Everyone has a paranoid side. The Jiang Li that has high IQ and no emotions in facing this chaotic and messy relationship problem would definitely be subject to paranoia.
Until Guan Xiao Yan showed up in his life.
………..
As for Jiang Li’ mom and Guan Xiao Yan’s mom, although they are both different types their attribute is quite identical——Both are very valiant.
Jiang Li’s mom believes that if a man has not married at the age of 30, then that man has failed. An extreme failure! In order to prevent her son from failing too, this beautiful language teacher did not throw a tantrum to deal with Jiang Li. Only a more ruthless method: cut off the ties between mother and son.
Jiang Li always feels that his mother is not very sane (this is similar to a some Guan’s mother), and surprisingly courageous. Although, he doesn’t quite believe that she would ever do such thing, somewhere in his mind he’s worried that she would be impulsive.
But the sad thing is, not only he has a valiant mother…He also has a valiant father.
The valiant part of his father is that, no matter what, he would always stand by his mother’s side be it right or wrong.
Which means if his mom doesn’t recognize him as her son, it is highly probable that his dad would stomp on his son’s head and curse, “fuck off!”
Don’t even expect mercy from this dad!
As to Jiang Li, he feels that this couple has lost their sanity.
When it’s six months away from Jiang Li’s thirty-year-old birthday, this valiant couple had already prepared a drama to end their parents-son relationship. They stopped picking up Jiang Li’s calls, nor opening the door when Jiang Li suddenly shows up on their doorstep.
The desperate Jiang Li has finally decided to execute his final plan and start going to blind dates. His best friend Han Xiao came up with a set of psychological questions that is believed to have the ability to tell if someone is troublesome, smart, and other indexes, but also one’s sexuality……Jiang Li believes that the last point is the most crucial one.
Jiang Li spreads his test questions across the web, then devoted himself into blind dates.
He’s standard is not so high. As long as they both agreed on faking their marriage, and other things such as couple duties are unnecessary.
An average person hearing his requests would think that there is something wrong with him, or that he has unspeakable problems. So in the end, every woman he met that stuck their eyes onto him would leave him with anger and disappointment.
After Jiang Li organized the emails he received, he picked out a random one that fit his requirements and called her.
He held the phone and looked at the sender’s name again, Guan Xiao Yan.
……
With those smart and pretty girls Jiang Li that have met before, Guan Xiao Yan is simply plain. So plain that if you don’t take a few more looks of her, you probably won’t recognize her again.
Dull, no ambition, not so smart, and sometimes would have brain fart……This is Jiang Li’s first impression of Guan Xiao Yan.
He was looking for a low-key wife, and it would be even better if she doesn’t even have the ability to be high-key. Therefore, these disadvantages of Guan Xiao Yan became advantages in Jiang Li’s eye.
And these two muddleheaded people got married with not a single hesitation.
These two simply thought that they can live their own life with no interference.
……
Jiang Li realizes, Guan Xiao Yan also had her share of past. Her past share similarities to his, but it can also be different……Of course, Jiang Li did not find it intriguing. He didn’t even care about his past, why bother to care about other people’s.
During the wedding night, Guan Xiao Yan was secretly watching a horror movie. The embarrassment she had on her face almost made him laugh. He came to realize that this woman in front of him is so dumb that he felt a clear advantage over her in terms of intelligence……A thought suddenly popped up in his head, it is actually fun to tease her sometimes.
At that time, he said that this thought is something that he had once. Only it has never been so clear and distinct.
Jiang Li feels that it’s all an unfathomable mystery.
And when he heard that Guan Xiao Yan can’t sleep by herself at night, Jiang Li almost couldn’t help but laugh. He didn’t think that he was mocking her, but in Guan Xiao Yan’s view, he was.
Jiang Li feels that he, himself, is a nice person. Thinking of Guan Xiao Yan’s troublesome expression, he couldn’t help but agree. Since my bed is pretty big, It will be fine to lend one-third of it to her.
In the past, Jiang Li never would have thought that he would actually let a woman onto his bed….A woman! He doesn’t even like females.
But then seeing her pitiful face made him think again. He may not like a woman but he can’t make things difficult for them.
This time, Guan Xiao Yan is smart. She went talking conditions with him.
Leading Jiang Li to have this feeling of wanting to cry yet laugh. He would never think that this would become a deal between them.
Thus, the negotiation was completed. He would give her half of his bed and she would do all the home chores.
No matter what, Jiang Li seems to have earned more in this deal. Although from the beginning he would never have expected this. But this is pretty nice. From now on, he doesn’t have to eat under her watch……Her cooking is actually not so bad, Jiang Li suddenly thought.
Jiang Li haven’t been to his company in a long time, of course, he doesn’t need to go for small problems. Only when things get complicated. But he soon developed a habit of roaming around his company. Since he has nothing to do anyways…..Besides, there are various technical problems that he is intrigued of.
Thus, Jiang Li decided to let Guan Xiao Yan go to Maldives alone. He has been there a few time already. Plus diving there isn’t anything that actually interests him.
Only when he discovered Guan Xiao Yan is actually expecting a romantic affair in Maldives, he thought that maybe it would be more interesting if he gets involved.
That is how wicked Jiang Li is, he admits it himself. Not only does he not like women, he despises those women that sleep around……Those that had a background full of history.
Every man has their own unique dignity, this we understand. Thus, when Jiang Li heard the talk between Guan Xiao Yan and a gangster looking guy talking about her incompetent husband. He had the urge to bury the two alive.
Fortunately, Guan Xiao Yan acknowledges the problem in a timely manner and scold out the guy. Only then was Jiang Li able to calm down a bit.
After coming back from Maldives, Guan Xiao Yan actually ate a lot more. To which she even consumed expired pills……Jiang Li came to realize that this woman is truly restless.
Upon discovering the sight of her breast one day, Jiang Li felt as if a mouse is tickling his heart. Very uncomfortable but yet strange and familiar.
When Guan Xiao Yan did not come back in time to cook for Jiang Li. He got furious. Even he, himself, realize the strangeness. It’s just that, he didn’t think that someone would be even more triggered than he is.
Guan Xiao Yan, how dare you! That the first thing that came to Jiang Li’s mind when Guan Xiao Yan hung up on him.
The second thought is, is she really mad?
Jiang Li felt baffled. Things are slipping out of this control, towards the unknown.
Guan Xiao Yan indeed didn’t go home but lamely went back to her parent’s house.
To handle Guan Xiao Yan, Jiang Li didn’t even need to use his brain. But upon seeing Guan Xiao Yan speechless after his oppressive words, Jiang Li suddenly felt opened up……This feeling beats everything.
When Guan Xiao Yan did not pick up her phone. To be honest, Jiang Li was kind of worried. Although he didn’t know what he is worried about.
After coming back home and seeing the sight of Guan Xiao Yan who looked as if nothing has happened. He had the urge to get yell at her.
Only when he saw her tears….
Seeing Guan Xiao Yan cry, Jiang Li panicked. He wanted to persuade her but had no idea where to start. He wanted to make her feel better but couldn’t open up. Alright, then just do something else to distract her.
Then Jiang Li decided to cook, something that he is terrible at.
When Guan Xiao Yan saw Jiang Li making a fool out of himself, she surely forgot about the sad things. She sat there happily looking down at him. Jiang Li could only shake his head speechlessly, this woman is heartless.
But in the meantime, Jiang Li wanted to know why Guan Xiao Yan cried. He is very curious as to why.
When Jiang Li saw Guan Xiao Yan and Wang Kai wearing the same clothing standing in front of him. His face looked peaceful but inside, umm, not so much.
The so-called showing off, Jiang Li is unclear about it either. Who does he want to show off to? Yu Zi Fei? Wang Kai?
It’s just when Jiang Li is in front of those two hand in hand with Guan Xiao Yan, he again had the urge to kiss her. The kiss, was is fake or real? Jiang Li didn’t know.
He only knows that his feeling towards her is kind of weird. As if it is……an affection between man and woman?
Now it’s getting troublesome, does he like man or woman?
This, caused Jiang Li to have some headaches. He wanted to make everything go naturally, but now, even that seems impossible. He had several drinks with a few of his old friends, everyone was making a fuss. They said that since he was the first to get married, he had to drink.
Every time Jiang Li think of Guan Xiao Yan, he felt lost and powerless. The feel when you are trying to get a hold of something but couldn’t get a hold of anything. He thought to himself, maybe it’s better to be paralyzed in alcohol.
So when Jiang Li caught Guan Xiao Yan taking his nudes, his first reaction was anger. Following after the second reaction which was……pretty good……
……
He was shocked by the thought.
Whenever he thinks of the Guan Xiao Yan that nosebleeds upon looking at his body, he wanted to laugh. At the same time, the feel of a mouse tickling his heart came up again. That should be……the feel of a man towards a woman.
Jiang Li is lost and distressed, completely unsatisfied with Guan Xiao Yan’s attitude. How come? Why does he have feelings for her when she doesn’t seem to have feelings for him?
Compare to Yu Zi Fei, Jiang Li believe that Wang Kai proposes more of a threat. One is in the past, one is happening right now. The past is the past, but what happens now causes more alert.
Therefore, when he heard Guan Xiao Yan confirming the kiss…Jiang Li completely lost his sanity.
Twenty-two years old. He graduated from college, met her and they hit it off.
Twenty-three years old. She became his girlfriend, the two promised to love each other forever and ever.
Twenty-four years old. He quit his job and started his own business.
Twenty-five years old. His business fell and he reached the lowest part of life.
Twenty-five years old. She left him.
Twenty-five years old. He felt that he was unable to hold up his own world.
When she left, she told him. Jiang Li, please forgive me. I am a very realistic person. If you were to blame, blame yourself for being useless.
If you had to blame, blame yourself for being useless.
Jiang Li lifts his head up from all the alcohol and opened his drunk eyes. Looking at the world in front of him, drunk……To blame, blame yourself for being useless.
No one should be obliged to pay for your failures. Even if it is the person you love, they can leave without hesitation. Talking about loving each other forever, these are all nonsense. Nonsense!
Men would speak with his strength.
Jiang Li clenched his fists and staggered into the beautiful yet evil world.
In the dark, as if there was a person talking to him said, “Jiang Li, congratulations. You have successfully reached nirvana.”
……
Twenty-eight years old. Jiang Li’s company was successfully listed.
Twenty-nine years old. Jiang Li no longer need to devote every second to his career. He now has the time to consider his relationships. However, even though it’s been four years now, every time he sees a woman he would feel annoyed. . . . It seems that the impact that woman had left is something that he had underestimated.
So Jiang Li felt that for the rest of his life, he won’t be attracted to women anymore.
Not attracted to women, then he should be attracted to men. Jiang Li casually thought.
Twenty-nine years old, Jiang Li met Xue Yun Feng.
At that time Xue Yun Feng had just broken up with his boyfriend. Under a terrible mood, he met Jiang Li at a gay party. So he grabbed his hand and asked him ‘would you be my boyfriend?’
Sure.
Jiang Li thought anyone to him would be considered the same. It doesn’t matter anymore. Since both parties don’t mind and females make him annoyed whereas males won’t, why not?
Therefore, Jiang Li was more convinced that he is a gay.
He could tell that Xue Yun Feng didn’t actually like him. He was just looking for some company. A relationship with no love was the best for Jiang Li.
And this is how two people came together for half a year already. Of course, in Jiang Li’s eyes, this is a matter which is not fresh nor bland.While it is not necessarily what Xue Yun Feng have in mind. Should Jiang Li realize sooner that Xue Yun Feng from that moment had planted a blooming smile across his face, then perhaps they would not have any future entanglements.
When Xue Yun Feng stood in front of Jiang Li fully naked. . . Jiang Li fled.
Xue Yun Feng doesn’t understand what Jiang Li is thinking. While Jiang Li, he also does not understand himself.
Maybe, maybe I just need to adapt. . . Jiang Li thinks.
But the thought of being with a man. . .
. . . His, his stomach just starts turning.
Jiang Li is very confused, ever since his dark twenty-five years, he has never been this confused. Although Jiang Li doesn’t understand, he is a dedicated person. Since he believed that he is a homosexual, then he should turn himself into a truly gay person…To be honest, even the author has never seen any man so dedicated on wanting to bend their own self.
So Jiang Li finally decided that he needed to adapt.
Everyone has a paranoid side. The Jiang Li that has high IQ and no emotions in facing this chaotic and messy relationship problem would definitely be subject to paranoia.
Until Guan Xiao Yan showed up in his life.
………..
As for Jiang Li’ mom and Guan Xiao Yan’s mom, although they are both different types their attribute is quite identical——Both are very valiant.
Jiang Li’s mom believes that if a man has not married at the age of 30, then that man has failed. An extreme failure! In order to prevent her son from failing too, this beautiful language teacher did not throw a tantrum to deal with Jiang Li. Only a more ruthless method: cut off the ties between mother and son.
Jiang Li always feels that his mother is not very sane (this is similar to a some Guan’s mother), and surprisingly courageous. Although, he doesn’t quite believe that she would ever do such thing, somewhere in his mind he’s worried that she would be impulsive.
But the sad thing is, not only he has a valiant mother…He also has a valiant father.
The valiant part of his father is that, no matter what, he would always stand by his mother’s side be it right or wrong.
Which means if his mom doesn’t recognize him as her son, it is highly probable that his dad would stomp on his son’s head and curse, “fuck off!”
Don’t even expect mercy from this dad!
As to Jiang Li, he feels that this couple has lost their sanity.
When it’s six months away from Jiang Li’s thirty-year-old birthday, this valiant couple had already prepared a drama to end their parents-son relationship. They stopped picking up Jiang Li’s calls, nor opening the door when Jiang Li suddenly shows up on their doorstep.
The desperate Jiang Li has finally decided to execute his final plan and start going to blind dates. His best friend Han Xiao came up with a set of psychological questions that is believed to have the ability to tell if someone is troublesome, smart, and other indexes, but also one’s sexuality……Jiang Li believes that the last point is the most crucial one.
Jiang Li spreads his test questions across the web, then devoted himself into blind dates.
He’s standard is not so high. As long as they both agreed on faking their marriage, and other things such as couple duties are unnecessary.
An average person hearing his requests would think that there is something wrong with him, or that he has unspeakable problems. So in the end, every woman he met that stuck their eyes onto him would leave him with anger and disappointment.
After Jiang Li organized the emails he received, he picked out a random one that fit his requirements and called her.
He held the phone and looked at the sender’s name again, Guan Xiao Yan.
……
With those smart and pretty girls Jiang Li that have met before, Guan Xiao Yan is simply plain. So plain that if you don’t take a few more looks of her, you probably won’t recognize her again.
Dull, no ambition, not so smart, and sometimes would have brain fart……This is Jiang Li’s first impression of Guan Xiao Yan.
He was looking for a low-key wife, and it would be even better if she doesn’t even have the ability to be high-key. Therefore, these disadvantages of Guan Xiao Yan became advantages in Jiang Li’s eye.
And these two muddleheaded people got married with not a single hesitation.
These two simply thought that they can live their own life with no interference.
……
Jiang Li realizes, Guan Xiao Yan also had her share of past. Her past share similarities to his, but it can also be different……Of course, Jiang Li did not find it intriguing. He didn’t even care about his past, why bother to care about other people’s.
During the wedding night, Guan Xiao Yan was secretly watching a horror movie. The embarrassment she had on her face almost made him laugh. He came to realize that this woman in front of him is so dumb that he felt a clear advantage over her in terms of intelligence……A thought suddenly popped up in his head, it is actually fun to tease her sometimes.
At that time, he said that this thought is something that he had once. Only it has never been so clear and distinct.
Jiang Li feels that it’s all an unfathomable mystery.
And when he heard that Guan Xiao Yan can’t sleep by herself at night, Jiang Li almost couldn’t help but laugh. He didn’t think that he was mocking her, but in Guan Xiao Yan’s view, he was.
Jiang Li feels that he, himself, is a nice person. Thinking of Guan Xiao Yan’s troublesome expression, he couldn’t help but agree. Since my bed is pretty big, It will be fine to lend one-third of it to her.
In the past, Jiang Li never would have thought that he would actually let a woman onto his bed….A woman! He doesn’t even like females.
But then seeing her pitiful face made him think again. He may not like a woman but he can’t make things difficult for them.
This time, Guan Xiao Yan is smart. She went talking conditions with him.
Leading Jiang Li to have this feeling of wanting to cry yet laugh. He would never think that this would become a deal between them.
Thus, the negotiation was completed. He would give her half of his bed and she would do all the home chores.
No matter what, Jiang Li seems to have earned more in this deal. Although from the beginning he would never have expected this. But this is pretty nice. From now on, he doesn’t have to eat under her watch……Her cooking is actually not so bad, Jiang Li suddenly thought.
Jiang Li haven’t been to his company in a long time, of course, he doesn’t need to go for small problems. Only when things get complicated. But he soon developed a habit of roaming around his company. Since he has nothing to do anyways…..Besides, there are various technical problems that he is intrigued of.
Thus, Jiang Li decided to let Guan Xiao Yan go to Maldives alone. He has been there a few time already. Plus diving there isn’t anything that actually interests him.
Only when he discovered Guan Xiao Yan is actually expecting a romantic affair in Maldives, he thought that maybe it would be more interesting if he gets involved.
That is how wicked Jiang Li is, he admits it himself. Not only does he not like women, he despises those women that sleep around……Those that had a background full of history.
Every man has their own unique dignity, this we understand. Thus, when Jiang Li heard the talk between Guan Xiao Yan and a gangster looking guy talking about her incompetent husband. He had the urge to bury the two alive.
Fortunately, Guan Xiao Yan acknowledges the problem in a timely manner and scold out the guy. Only then was Jiang Li able to calm down a bit.
After coming back from Maldives, Guan Xiao Yan actually ate a lot more. To which she even consumed expired pills……Jiang Li came to realize that this woman is truly restless.
Upon discovering the sight of her breast one day, Jiang Li felt as if a mouse is tickling his heart. Very uncomfortable but yet strange and familiar.
When Guan Xiao Yan did not come back in time to cook for Jiang Li. He got furious. Even he, himself, realize the strangeness. It’s just that, he didn’t think that someone would be even more triggered than he is.
Guan Xiao Yan, how dare you! That the first thing that came to Jiang Li’s mind when Guan Xiao Yan hung up on him.
The second thought is, is she really mad?
Jiang Li felt baffled. Things are slipping out of this control, towards the unknown.
Guan Xiao Yan indeed didn’t go home but lamely went back to her parent’s house.
To handle Guan Xiao Yan, Jiang Li didn’t even need to use his brain. But upon seeing Guan Xiao Yan speechless after his oppressive words, Jiang Li suddenly felt opened up……This feeling beats everything.
When Guan Xiao Yan did not pick up her phone. To be honest, Jiang Li was kind of worried. Although he didn’t know what he is worried about.
After coming back home and seeing the sight of Guan Xiao Yan who looked as if nothing has happened. He had the urge to get yell at her.
Only when he saw her tears….
Seeing Guan Xiao Yan cry, Jiang Li panicked. He wanted to persuade her but had no idea where to start. He wanted to make her feel better but couldn’t open up. Alright, then just do something else to distract her.
Then Jiang Li decided to cook, something that he is terrible at.
When Guan Xiao Yan saw Jiang Li making a fool out of himself, she surely forgot about the sad things. She sat there happily looking down at him. Jiang Li could only shake his head speechlessly, this woman is heartless.
But in the meantime, Jiang Li wanted to know why Guan Xiao Yan cried. He is very curious as to why.
When Jiang Li saw Guan Xiao Yan and Wang Kai wearing the same clothing standing in front of him. His face looked peaceful but inside, umm, not so much.
The so-called showing off, Jiang Li is unclear about it either. Who does he want to show off to? Yu Zi Fei? Wang Kai?
It’s just when Jiang Li is in front of those two hand in hand with Guan Xiao Yan, he again had the urge to kiss her. The kiss, was is fake or real? Jiang Li didn’t know.
He only knows that his feeling towards her is kind of weird. As if it is……an affection between man and woman?
Now it’s getting troublesome, does he like man or woman?
This, caused Jiang Li to have some headaches. He wanted to make everything go naturally, but now, even that seems impossible. He had several drinks with a few of his old friends, everyone was making a fuss. They said that since he was the first to get married, he had to drink.
Every time Jiang Li think of Guan Xiao Yan, he felt lost and powerless. The feel when you are trying to get a hold of something but couldn’t get a hold of anything. He thought to himself, maybe it’s better to be paralyzed in alcohol.
So when Jiang Li caught Guan Xiao Yan taking his nudes, his first reaction was anger. Following after the second reaction which was……pretty good……
……
He was shocked by the thought.
Whenever he thinks of the Guan Xiao Yan that nosebleeds upon looking at his body, he wanted to laugh. At the same time, the feel of a mouse tickling his heart came up again. That should be……the feel of a man towards a woman.
Jiang Li is lost and distressed, completely unsatisfied with Guan Xiao Yan’s attitude. How come? Why does he have feelings for her when she doesn’t seem to have feelings for him?
Compare to Yu Zi Fei, Jiang Li believe that Wang Kai proposes more of a threat. One is in the past, one is happening right now. The past is the past, but what happens now causes more alert.
Therefore, when he heard Guan Xiao Yan confirming the kiss…Jiang Li completely lost his sanity.
