Chapter 4: Kowloon Monkey King– Kowloon Monk
「Good evening. Do you have a room?」「How much for a night?」「I’ll stay the night.」
Pointing to the few Chinese phrases I had copied from Shirayuki’s guidebook into my Butei handbook– I managed to check myself into a cramped business hotel in the Sheung Wan district in about 15 minutes.
In order to avoid having my valuables stolen again, I left everything in the complimentary room safe.
Then with weapons, cash, and passport in hand, I set out once more.
In accordance with our standing strategy (Half of which Reki had contributed), I walked through downtown Hong Kong.
The plan was the same as yesterday, but this time it’s different: I’m prepared.
According to the messages I received on my recovered mobile, Shirayuki was in Wan Chai and Riko was in Causeway Bay recommencing Operation Barley.
Baskerville was split into the Team Aria and Team Kinji, but Reki slipped me a message that:「Everything is fine over here.」
Everything should be fine in Kowloon.
Rounding a street corner…
*Bang!* *Bang!* *Bang!*
I turned toward the gunshot-like sounds… but they were firecrackers.
Because of the warm weather, it didn’t immediately spring to mind that Christmas and New Year’s were coming up. Those sounds must have been a test for the upcoming celebrations.
As I was waiting at a traffic light in front of a sports supply store, several children were pestering their parents for skateboards. Piled haphazardly in a bin in front of the shop, they were selling well. It seems that the Christmas sales rush is the same in every country.
(I can’t understand the words… but they must be asking for them as presents.)
As I cast a smiling glance back at the parents and children…
*Bam!* *Screech!*
A double-decker tram car came to a halt across the intersection. It was covered in a Christmas-themed design, and although it was only a short distance in front of me, we were separated by a large billboard.
From the tram car:
*Waaah!* *Haha!*
A group of chattering students from a girls’ school just got off.
…Oh! That white uniform. I’ve seen it before. It’s the same as the one Yuan was wearing.
As I had that thought…
*Bam!* *Screech!*
「…!?」
Another tram car with Kung-Fu Panda dressed as Santa on it screeched to a stop, and even more girls in school uniforms flooded out.
What the–!
That’s strange.
The girls in white uniforms were laughing and chattering, but aren’t there a bit too many of them…?
Just now 30 of them got off one tram. Is this normal in China?
No, they’re still coming.
Not just from the doors, but they are also popping out from the windows as well. This is definitely not normal.
Looking around, I’m surrounded by about 100 girls in white uniforms. Now that I look closer, even the tram operators are schoolgirls wearing the same uniform.
As I tried to put up my guard, from the left…
*Rrrrr!* *Rrrrr!*
–!
….A….FV603 Saracen…!1
An HKPF armoured vehicle was lumbering forward!
The FV603 is a six-wheeled armoured attack vehicle. It saw action in Northern Ireland, and its armour is strong enough to repel even military machine gun fire.
It has an M1919 machine gun mounted on top of a rotating turret, and from space within the rounded Type-97 tank tube antenna…
*Click!*
The hatch opened, and with black hair secured in two twin-tails with round hair ornaments–
「–Koko…!」
An alternatively coloured version of Aria, Rampan’s Koko appeared…!
Wearing glasses and carrying a golden megaphone she said:
「Attention! Attention! Recording for a film will begin here shortly. For your own safety we ask that all persons vacate the area.」
Announcing something in Chinese… everyone nearby quickly cleared the area. Except for the white uniformed school girls.
It was clear that these girls were cooperating with Koko… they must be students at one of the Rampan funded schools that Riko told me about. Huh!? So that means even Yuan…!?
Before I even had the time to complete that thought, Koko had already finished clearing the area of people and said–
「–Kinchi! Hawve you been taking care of my older shister in Jawpan?」
With only her top half exposed, she pointed her megaphone toward me and shouted in lisping Japanese.
She was still wearing a Qing Dynasty era Chinese noble’s clothes like something from『Mr. Vampire』2.
Hers were pink and gold, though.
「We’ve had ouwr eyes on you the whole time you’wve been wandering awound Hong Kong! There’s been pwenty of time to see to our defewnces! Beating Awia and Kinchi together would be a pwoblem. Fwighting Reki would awlso be hawd– I, Jinyang, hawve learned that from my older sisters: Juujuu, Paonyang and Meimei! But Awia is not here and Kinchi is alone! It shouwld’nt be a pwoblem!」
Saying that… Koko raised her eyebrows. But she did not get out of the armoured car.
Her attitude is hostile. Extremely so. It seems that the peace proposal I left with Kou hasn’t reached her yet.
However… They’ve brought in an APC to bring me down. They’ve spent a lot of time and money. What’s going to show up next, a tank?
「…!」
As I assessed the trouble facing me, the white uniformed school girls surrounded me with a human wall and were gradually closing in.
With me at the centre of their ring, their ranks thickened as they converged. Beyond the crowd to my right, the way was blocked by the tram car, and to the left, the APC. To my rear was a multi-level building.
–I’m surrounded. It would be hard to escape from this concentric encirclement.
「Koko! I have to warn you! I don’t know which Koko you are, but if you’re a part of Rampan, you should know! The rules of FEW are that victory and defeat are decided by duels. None of these girls look like they could handle that. Surrounding your enemy with civilians is against the rules!」
「Fu! Fu! What ruwles!」
Mocking me, Koko stuck out her tongue and pulled down one of her adorable almond-shaped eyes.
「Evwy encounter has its own ruwles. Now I’ve just decided on new ruwles!」
She said, completely disregarding the rules. If that’s how it is, then why the hell even bother having rules at all!
I wonder if this is being done with the assent of the whole organisation, or if it was the blood-revenge of the fourth Koko– Jinyang, was it? She might be taking rash action on her own, but I don’t know.
「In war you have to fight awot of pweople! Overwhelming numbwers is the most basic techniwque!」
「But… even so, the people you are using are just girls…!」
Bewildered by the fact that the enemy would completely abandon the rules, the white uniformed girls drew their ring tighter and tighter.
As they got closer… What’s this I notice? They’re all cute!
Because they’re all shorter than the average Japanese person, many of them are quite petite, but they all have nice figures.
「These giwls are students at Ran Girl’s Highschool3. I knew you were bad with giwls, Kinchi. I prepawed a situation I just knew you’d wove. Get him! Hee! Hee!」
Giving that order in a shrill voice, Koko flourished a red folding fan with the『曹』character4 in black.
Taking that signal, the girls all squealed *Kyaaaaa!*
Still shrieking, they surged toward me.
「–Wait…!」
I shrunk back against the sport supply store, and in an instant, I was trapped– And we were instantly jammed together: like a musician mobbed by their fans.
S-so this is the kind of situation you think I enjoy? I’m disappointed.
「By the way, Kinchi, don’t you know? It was witten in the Hiwokane Inwestigation. Iwokane is–」
Koko said. Then with a *Fwoosh!* she covered her lips with the fan. Her narrowed eyes said:『Oh, maybe I shouldn’t say!』
「…?」
As she dropped that hint, my eyebrows furrowed, but… right then, I didn’t process all of what she said.
Still smiling, from every direction, the girls reached out their hands and held down one of my hands, arms or legs.
「H-Hey…! That feels weird! Stop it!」
I tried to resist, but each of my arms and legs had 3 or 4 girls holding them down. I literally could not move hand or foot.
The Koko with glasses continued:
「Of the four Koko shisters, I am the most meticuwous. Kinchi, you are a man whose actions cannot be pwedicted. I have carefuwy stwipped away your defences. Hee hee!」
She said as she remained half hidden inside the APC.
First of all, it’s impossible for me to escape this sea of girls– Even if I could, their commander is protected by more than 10 mm of armour plating on the FV603 Saracen. My gun wouldn’t even make a dent in it.
Continuing to squeal as they held me down– The beautiful girls first took my gun, then my knife. While they were doing that, there were a few hands that tickled the back of my neck. I-It’s truly hopeless.
「Now then, Kinchi, will you suwender? If you do, I’ll give you awl these giwls. It a time-honoured stwatgey to seduce enemy commanders. If they’re not enough, I’ll giwve you a hundwed more. Fwom now on you’re sure to be a piece on the board for the Koko!」
「…Wha… how stupid…!」
In the press of girls, I could do nothing but be struck dumb in amazement.
So this is the kind of enemy you meet when you step outside of Japan, huh?
Rampan must be trying to lure me into their organisation with this show of force. A Japanese person would never anticipate this kind of high-handed action. There’s also their organisational abilities to consider. I hadn’t treated them any different than any other opponent I had faced, and so I was unable to react.
–This is totally foreign.
Japanese common sense never applied here, but I’ve used it from the beginning and thought just like a Japanese person would.
I acted on the assumption that the enemy would respect the rules of war, and having caught an enemy combatant, released her, thinking to open a dialogue for peaceful negotiations.
But– It was all for nothing. Not a single thing I did worked. I was narrow minded in planning my strategy.
Despite all that, I over eagerly rushed into a foreign assault–
They successfully struck at my weakness, and this is the result.
I was too slow in realising it. I’m caught, and these girls are able to keep me here.
「Koko…! Let’s talk…! Kou! Kou and I… We had an agreement…!」
I played my only trump card as I lay pinned down and–
With a *Snap!*, Koko closed the fan.
Then there was a loud clanging, then she gestured toward the hatch.
「Kou is right here!」
Wha… What…! She’s inside…!?
I seized the ray of hope that if she was here, there might be a chance to negotiate, but at that instant– There was a large crash.
A bare foot appeared above the personnel compartment hatch.
Then with a *Spring!*
A girl in the Nagoya High cutoff sailor suit uniform jumped out with a speed and power only possible in cartoons or video games.
「Kou…!」
Landing on the round bar-like antenna, she was…
…d-different.
I could sense it.
It was her body, but it wasn’t her.
It had to be– the other person…!
「Ha ha ha! To be more pwecise–The Kowloon Monk, Son Goku. You’wve met. Members of Rampan saw you. As soon as we heard, we uwsed『Patra’s Key』to change Kou into Son. But you had awready let her go as soon as you cawght her. If you had kept her, Son would hawve mopped you all nicely. What wasted opportuwnity!」
Next to Koko…
「Kuru kukuru karararoru.」
Kou, no… Son mumbled in her strange language.
With monkey-like agility and her long black hair streaming behind her…
*Whoosh!*
Sailor suit flapping so much I thought it might slip off, she dove into the sea of girls. It was like a musician taking a dive into the audience.
「…!」
In sync with her movements, the girls lifted their palms up above their heads, catching Son–
Son curled her body as if she were a huge ball being passed overhead for a Sports Festival event, headed my way.
Then the girls put their palms together, creating a space… and in the middle of the crowd– *Whish!* Son posed barefoot, looking like a classic Chinese Opera performer with red eyeshadow around her eyes.
「Korukararosu, ararasu, kuruararu」
–It wasn’t just the makeup. Her tone of voice and carriage were different than Kou’s. There was this unmatched and indescribable expression of transcendent quality to her.
I saw it for the first time of the roof of the Kagataka Family headquarters… it’s Son.
Kou could be reasoned with, but this person…
With Son…
Impossible. It was impressed upon me the instant we met. We don’t even speak the same language.
Opening their hands with perfect timing, the girls created footholds… She strode forward like a model walking on blossoming lily pads– One step following the other.
Surely this is Son Goku. Globally recognised fairy-tale character.
Human in appearance, but unearthly in attitude. And if it had to be put into words: beautiful. Striking in appearance, and completely captivating.
Trapped under the weight of girls, she drew closer to me and looking down–
*Flop!*
She laid down in the posture of a recumbent Buddha, supported by countless hands.
「Kuruhirirua」
A centimetre away, her childish face harbored a sharp glint in her eye.
The same right eye that shot G-3 is now in front of me…!
「Son–!」
The word reflexively escaped my mouth–
–*Lick!*
She licked me.
Then she pressed our lips together.
「…!」
I was frozen for a brief instant, but…
Thanks to my long association with the paranormal world, somehow I understood what had happened.
Just now she had used some magical technique. Our lips had touched, and the true reason for the action–
「Kou is so terrified, she can’t help it.」
I immediately recognised Son’s inflections when speaking Japanese were my own.
「Don’t look so surprised, Tohyama. Rest assured, I have merely transcribed your knowledge of modern Japanese language. I’ve never done it with a man before, so I wasn’t sure if it would work or not.」
Rolling over and cupping my head in her hands–
「Now then, Tohyama, shall we fight?」
She said, grinning, and I immediately wrenched my head to the side.
「Don’t worry. I like your looks. I won’t kill you right away with the Nyoibou.」
…Things are happening just like Kou said they would.
***********************************************
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*Ka-Thump!*
At the feeling of blood flow, I gave a wry laugh at myself.
「–Son. You’ve challenged me to a duel as Rampan’s representative. Do I have that right?」
「Idiot. Take it however you want. This fight with you will be like fighting ants. Whatever you say. On that point, Koko and I agree.」
*Ka-Thump!*
It’s starting. I can feel it inside.
「–I like strong men. I just want to fight them. That fight with G-3 was a real shame. I was only half awake when I killed him.」
–I see! I’ve gained one piece of valuable intel.
Son still thinks that she killed G-3. In other words, Kou and Son can’t share information like Sayonaki and Vlad could..
The reason I could understand that was because it had happened: Hysteria Mode.
My goodness! I’m surprised at myself.
I went into Hysteria Mode over such a young thing– All over Kou who looks like a 5th year primary schooler.
She’s set a record for the youngest girl that has sent me into Hysteria Mode.
Come to think of it, Son has lived for over 1400 years, so wouldn’t that make her the oldest girl, I wonder?
「You want to fight me… huh? I never could refuse a woman. And so I must grant your request.」
With these Hysteria Mode infused words, I turned a smile toward Son.
As I am now– I am a knight solely devoted to womankind.
Alright. I will fight you. You are a proper Rampan soldier. The rules of war must not be be broken.
Furthermore, I don’t know you well.
A fight is a kind of communication. The act brings a deep, mutual understanding of each other.
I am honoured to be allowed to do so by such a world famous lady.
I will ascertain what kind of person you are. Using this fight.
But–
30 minutes.
In my current state, I’m a poison to girls. If I keep it up too long, they get addicted to that version of me, and I get all kinds of dangerous looks from them. Aria is a prime example.
So I set a time limit. Host clubs have no restrictions, but the Kinji Club has a limit.
Within that time-span, however, I am completely yours–
「–Come with me and I will show you your dreams.」
While still her prisoner, I smiled an invitation to her…
Son smiled, as pleased as if she had gotten the name of the number one host in a club.
「Now then, Son. Let us move on to the main course. But I must ask forgiveness for one thing. I would love nothing better than to take your hand to escort you. However–」
As I spoke, I had already put the bottom of one foot down on the ground– I placed the foot on one of the skateboards from the bin in front of the sports equipment shop.
Then sensing the flow of energy in the girls holding my arms…
「My hand will be occupied for the next 10 seconds due to a work responsibility. So I will be unable to do so.」
*Pop!* *Pop!* *Pop!*
Just like I did in the Ikebukuro High elevator with the『Transfer Student Couple’s Support Club』, I peeled them off one by one– Using their own power against them.
Leading them on, I had the girls holding on to each other to form a large ring with me in the centre.
「I’ve already had my things stolen in Hong Kong. Now I must take them back.」
The girls stared blankly at my prefatory remarks because I had spoken in Japanese.
I tucked my legs in with the skateboard on the ground underneath me.
Then kicking off the wall strongly–
I moved through the forest of fluttering skirts and legs, balancing from time to time on two wheels,
In the original technique, you would lay face down, and I adapted it for use on a skateboard… but this is an old Tohyama family secret technique:『Hidden Forest』.
It was originally designed to penetrate the ranks of horsemen and foot soldiers to kill the general that they were protecting by crawling between their legs like a snake.
Following the original technique, I would have cut their Achilles tendons, but… it would be a crime to harm these long, white, graceful legs– Each of them surpassing an exquisite work of art.
Instead of doing that, I used my hands to steal–to recover–what was mine.
My precious Beretta, butterfly knife, and scramsax.
I returned each to its respective holster, pocket, and concealed scabbard on my back as I escaped the world’s most beautiful forest and came to a screeching stop.
「Things should be kept in their proper place, don’t you think?」
Flipping up the skateboard with my toes, I winked as I now stood on the outside of the ring of girls.
All of the girls that had used human wave tactics against me were standing shocked as they held their skirts in place, but thanks to that, my Hysteria Mode only intensified.
「That’s right! Ha ha ha! How funny, Tohyama!」
Eyes wide in amazement, Son still stood supported on the hands of the girls as she turned toward me.
I’ve escaped the first circle and put it behind me.
Now then…
I began thinking how to escape the second ring– The wall created by the double-decker trams and APC.
First of all, on the left, I’m a little leery of having to deal with the APC.
Ahead of me and to my right the tram cars tower over 7 metres forming a high wall. Even in Hysteria Mode that would be hard to scale.
I have to change my thinking. I was thinking of them as walls, but– Fundamentally, they are still vehicles that move.
「If I recall correctly, it should be 2.3 HKD, right?」
Mumbling this to myself, I dashed into one of the unoccupied trams. As my left hand deposited the amount of the fare, my right reached for the operator’s platform.
Recollecting my ride yesterday, it was easy to figure out how to drive it.
With a heavy sounding *Ka-thunk!* the former wall lurched forward.
Alright! Now the tram will move by itself.
Because the tram won’t collide with the other, I set the speed to 10 KPH.
「Tohyamaaaa!!!」
From her cry, I could pinpoint Son’s position as she ran above the girls’ heads
It’s fine, I’m already moving. I know she’ll catch up anyway. I won’t change speed.
Looking back over my shoulder to see how much Son had caught up with me…
I saw all the girls who had surrounded me–without exception–were standing, staring in shock.
Their leader’s plans had never accounted for this, and they haven’t received any instructions.
Among them the most surprised face belonged to…
I thought she’d be here.
The one who had helped me yesterday in North Point, Yuan Meishi-chan.
I knew it the moment I saw that uniform that she attended one of Rampan’s schools. Yesterday she had told me that the school was looking for information on a specific person after all…
It seems that I was that person.
Her eyes seemed to say:「There’s no way such a stupid Japanese person is『The Enabler』!」as she looked at me– but that nickname is too much.
I’ve only done all kinds of things because Aria absurdly decreed:『You’re forbidden to say the word ‘impossible’.』Wouldn’t a more proper nickname be:『The man who is forbidden from impossibility.』, then?5
Ugh… I feel bad for myself.
Following the tracks, the car squealed loudly as it turned to the right…
「–Kinchi! You can’t escape!」
Koko shouted into her megaphone, now slightly angry.
Having seen where the tracks led, I chose this tram over the other one– This one went east and entered a narrow alleyway.
Your own plan backfired on you, Koko. You can’t follow me in that wide-bodied vehicle.
「…Son! Follow Kinchi!!」
Koko shouted, planning to circle around, and pushed the APC onto the main road.
「–Even if you didn’t say that, I was planning to!」
Shouting that…
*Tap!* *Tap!* *Tap!*
She started running, her cut-off sailor suit flapping all the while, and jumped onto the entryway of the slow moving tram car.
「Tohyama! It’s just the two of us! Let’s have some fun!」
「Being alone with a woman doesn’t sound bad to me.」
Saying that, I fell back to the passenger area of the tram.
*Pow!* *P-pow!* *Pow!*
The space inside the tram exploded with sound as Son unleashed a flurry of claw and heel-hand strikes.
One sharp blow rapidly followed another, and I got the feeling that if I suffered a direct hit, it’d be instantly fatal, but–
–I could see them, so it goes without saying that I avoided them.
There are handrails and many hanging straps inside here. Pulling off kicks would be difficult, and handwork would be cramped. But even so, I planned to fight here.
But… Son leapt up with a:「Hii!」grabbing a handrail in her right hand and a hanging strap in her left– Then with her body in a cruciform position,
*Pa!* *P-pa!* * Pa!*
More concussive sounds filled the air from her left and right feet, and even her tail, using them to unleash three more strikes.
On my side, I couldn’t exactly『dodge』because of the cramped space, so–
「–!」
So I crossed my arms and『received』them.
The impact was terrible, and pushed my whole body onto the stairs
S-she’s so small… but so strong.
If I hadn’t used『Kikka』, both my arms would have been torn off at the elbows.
「…Don’t you think you might want to hold back on the kicking in that short skirt of yours?」
I said, half jokingly, but I couldn’t follow that last attack– Using her tail to push off the wall, she obliqued her trajectory mid-air– At the same time she also let fly a spinning kick I received with my arms again.
The blow didn’t kill me, but the stairs were shattered under my feet.
S-She’s strong. The whole tram chassis groaned.
Son’s striking power was about 7 times greater than my『Ouka』or G-3’s『Meteor』.
Even with my repeated use of Kikka, I’m taking damage.
More properly speaking, it’s because I can’t move. In this space, I don’t have the room to evade.
「Tohyama! It’s no fun if you don’t try to hit me.」
Her orange tail coiled around a handrail, she dropped down from the level above, wearing an innocent looking smile– This cramped space doesn’t seem to be giving her any trouble at all, and she’s able to skillfully execute powerful strikes..
Like a monkey in the forest.
No, Son actually does possess monkey-like traits. From past experiences, I know there are a lot of those with animal-like qualities, such as Tamamo the fox and Hilda the bat.
Fighting in close quarters inside the tram, I’m at a disadvantage…!
Retreating to the second floor, I hung out through the window, looking for a temporary hiding place–
「–!」
Just then, another tram coming the opposite way whizzed by, almost hitting me and causing me to stumble back inside.
I-if the sides are not good then–
–I have to go up
I have nowhere else left to run…!
Pulling my body out the second level rear window, I pulled myself up to the roof with two hands–
「…?」
And was greeted by the murmuring of a crowd from all around us.
Looking around… All through the alleyway Hong Kong residents were looking on bemused. From the rows of condominiums more faces peered out, all smiling.
It looks like they think this is an actual film shoot.
「Amazing! You really know Hong Kong well, don’t you, Kinji Tohyama? You even have an audience.」
Son addressed me as she clambered up the roof from the front window.
「…I don’t really understand the reason for their cheering.」
It seems like I’m being given time to catch my breath…
「Moving a fight from inside to outside and having fast-paced hand-to-hand combat are staples of Hong Kong cinema.」
Son said, indicating the happily grinning gallery–
Perhaps slightly annoyed, she crossed her arms in front of her slightly developed chest.
「Ohh!…Now I get it! I love Hong Kong action films!」
Now the surroundings are very different than the cramped interior of the tram.
I have a wider range of freedom for offensive and defensive action.
Or so I thought…but in it’s own way, this place is confining as well.
Things could get difficult if the fight goes on much longer because of something Hong Kong is famous for:
The countless number of signs, neon Kanji lights, and signboards hanging overhead.
Billboards of all colours and sizes hung at irregular heights were quickly approaching. More accurately, it was the tram that was approaching the signs under its own power.
The signs have passed over our heads until now, but they can’t be entirely discounted because there are many signs that will graze the roof of the tram. Things will turn into some kind of acrobatic performance if things go on.
「Hee Hee! Let’s give them a show! Scene 2 Take 5: Kung Fu Action Atop a Moving Tram. You don’t want to let the audience down, do you? I’ll scatter your flesh and blood like a shower of cherry blossoms.」
Cheerfully, Son bent her elbow at 90 degrees and took a stance with her palm toward heaven, legs bent, hips low–
*Whish!* *Whish!* *Whoosh!*
It was a slightly intriguing Kung Fu stance.
Beautiful. Perfect posture. Southern Shaolin Kung Fu.
Of all the numerous Chinese martial arts to choose to use in a close quarters fight atop this shaking vehicle, she has chosen wisely.
…However, this is no time to be praising the beautiful girl that is my opponent.
I still have to come up with some way to deal with those devastating attacks.
「If you think you can scatter the petals of the Tohyama cherry tree– Come and try.」
So… I took up the stance for『Zetsurou』–
As I thought, the locals were under the misunderstanding that this was a film shoot and everyone…
*Raaaaah!*
From every level of every building, cheers rang out.
As Son and I squared off, all around us a mass of brightly coloured signs skimmed past us one after another.
With a rumbling sound echoing through the darkening sky– An Air China flight on a low approach unique to Hong Kong skimmed the rooftops.
From one of the buildings, someone stuck out a wok as a substitute for a gong, striking it with a *Bong!*–
Signalling the start of Son’s and my second round of hand-to-hand action.
[END CHAPTER FOUR]
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Chapter 5
[BEGIN CHAPTER FIVE]
The first sign to skim past was a wide『Tenkorou Ltd.』sign hanging at chest height– Son back-flipped and I ducked to avoid it.
Taking advantage of the instant my field of view was obstructed, Son– *Pa!*
Crossed the 9 metres from the front to the back of the tram in a single leap.
It looked like wire-work, because it covered a distance that common sense dictated was impossible.
The instant she landed, Son struck, *Bam!* and kicked up toward the sky in a Kung Fu movement.
–Zetsurou!
Even with all these people watching me, I turned my body into a revolving door and received her attack with the Tohyama family secret technique.
Using the densest part of my body–absorbing the power of her bare heeled kick– And that instant, I switched from defence to offense.
–*Ba!* Using Son’s kick, I kicked myself back into a somersault– A move that even G-3 at 100 times acceleration is Hysteria Mode couldn’t track, and capturing–
「–Eh!」
Son noticed and responded.
Crossing her arms over her chest and abdomen, she cut the power of my attack in half, dispersing it with her arms. She took damage, but it was minor.
W-what reflexes! I am fighting a non-human after all.
It seems my prison is not so ‘absolute’6. Because of the shaking of the tram, my balance wasn’t centred. But that’s just self-consolation talking because I didn’t want to believe my secret technique had been seen through.
「–!」
Pushed back to the front of the tram by the force of my attack, Son looked slightly surprised.
She must have never expected that a human was capable of such a thing, forcing her to fall back on the defensive for a moment.
–*Lick!*
Licking her lips, her mouth formed into a grinning smile.
「…Not bad, Tohyama. You’re full of surprises.」
With seeming perfect assurance of the knowledge of what was behind her, Son leapt up over the approaching signboard– Twisting her body on the other side she struck, and kicked the sign toward me.
As I turned to dodge the flying Coca-Cola sign, Son jumped off the tram and pushed off the side of the building in a kick– *Bam!*
–!
Barely sidestepping, the flying kick grazed past my hair.
With a *Pa!*, Son caught herself with her toes, balancing on another sign and leapt back toward me. Turning her whole body into a projectile, she tried to collide with me. I tried to catch her and perform a throw– But her body had an unnatural lift that allowed her to escape my grasp. She caught herself on another overhead sign board and hung from a iron bar by her tail.
Then she dropped down, trying to shred my body with another barefoot kick.
What’s with this 3-D battle? It’s like a gymnastics exhibition!
「–Spinning Ax–!」
Landing in a handstand, she supported herself on crossed hands–
Uncrossing her arms, she spun herself around.
In less than one second, she unleashed a three part attack with her right foot, left foot, and tail directed at my abdomen.
It was devastating. If I hadn’t dodged it at the last possible moment, I would have been cut in half.
Backing up to the edge of the roof to create some distance, I:
「…Son. Uh… Do you think you could hold back a bit? You skirt and blouse are very short after all.」
I asked while trying to hide the cold sweat that had broken out–
Rotating in her handstand, she arched herself backward onto her feet like a gymnast and faced me with a grin. Like Tamamo had done, she shaped her tail into a『?』shape.
「Tohyama, you certainly… don’t think of my body as a woman’s? This body stopped developing at the age of 10. Look, it’s a child’s!」
Son turned her buttocks toward me and slapped them to show me. Then turning only her head back, made an akanbe face at me.
Just like a primary schooler teasing a highschooler.
「…What about that, Tohyama?」
「Even though you say that…」
Her behaviour though… Is that of a woman, and it stirs up male feelings.
Is this what you’d call: The body of a child and the mind of an adult?7 It’s applicable to Son.
It must be like a shorter, older woman… Yeah, that fits. I don’t dislike them, after all.
Normally, I wouldn’t like talking about such things, but… right now, I need some reasons to buy time.
The girls of CVR use their gender– And I will do the same thing.
「…Men have an unreasoning reaction to female affection. You may have heard from Koko but my performance in battle depends on it.」
「Well then how is it going? What’s your reaction to me?」
「Not bad. You might be my type.」
The tram has been moving for 2, maybe 3 minutes..
「…Your taste makes me bit nervous, but I’m happy to be treated as a woman. In all 2000 years of life, I’ve never even been slightly wanted.」
As her skirt ruffled in the wind, Son looked pleased.
「…but are you sure you really want someone like me?」
She looked down at her non-existent chest and the line of her legs.
She was a girl that, until now, had never been wanted, yet yearned for love…
But now, meeting a man who told her he liked her as she was, she had an expression of disbelief as she trembled.
「–Women are women from the day they are born. They are the flowers that adorn the world. It is a basic human instinct to cherish them, so my older brother… er… older sister… er, brother taught me. So I love you.」
While I whispered these half understood sweet nothings–
I was secretly operating my mobile in the hand held behind my back.
「…I-I’m warning you! Older women are scary if you play with our feelings. I’ll give you the cruelest torture in all China then finish you off with the Nyoibou.」
Son blushed an appropriate shade of red to match the colour of the terribly bloody statement.
「Now that we’ve reached this point…let me introduce you to my other, lovable flowers– My girlfriends.」
「Cheating already!?」
「It’s part of life.」
As I said that…
Because of my response, Son finally realised I was using my mobile behind my back.
「–Hey, Tohyama– Don’t call your friends. You want more dead bodies?」
But I had already been given enough time to make the call.
「Son, you should have listened when I warned you about fighting in those scandalous clothes… Because of that, my blood flow has increased– I’ve gotten stronger.」
I sense it in my core, alongside a feeling of heat.
At the start, my Hysteria Mode was confused by the moral quandary presented by Son’s childish appearance, but… now that I know she is older, the obstacle has suddenly been removed. I do have a preference for older women, after all.
「Now then, I’ll give you a fun fact about Japanese culture. Japanese love their mobiles. So much that we can do anything while using them.」
「Anything? Alright, then I’ll attack you again. That way you’ll need to use both hands.」
「Come on. Check out my hands-free style.」
I was already connected to Shirayuki, so I tossed my mobile through the gap between billboards–
Son rushed me and using both feet and legs, began a flurry of blows.
*Bam!* *Pow!* Whomp!*
One heavy blow after another. But my Kikka worked admirably. 2 or 3 times, I was also able to use Zetsurou and turn her attack back on her, and she frowned at the inexplicable technique.
While fighting Son Goku and dodging groups of hanging signs–
「Hello? Shirayuki?」
*Bounce!* *Bounce!*
My mobile fell from the sky, and keepie-uppie-ing it, I spoke to Shirayuki.
『Kin-chan?』
「I met an enemy. They’re harassing me right now.」
『Eeeeh!?』
Son aimed a roundhouse at my head, and I ducked–
I rolled my head back around to continue speaking normally.
With my Hysteria Mode reasoning, I then said:
「Turn onto Hennessy Road from Admiralty Road, then follow the tram tracks.」
The ICC looks down on Hong Kong, providing a bird’s eye view. Combine that with her memory of the GPS map I showed her yesterday, Shirayuki should be able to follow the route.
Shirayuki is in the Wan Chai area looking for Rampan, and this tram is headed in that direction. I planned to meet up from the start when I planned my escape. The tram was rumbling right along, all I needed was time, and at the end we’d get there.
「–Haaa!」
Son cried as she unleashed a kick that almost completely exposed her backside–
Sensing the beginning of her movement and seizing the initiative, I executed a one-inch punch taken from Chinese Martial Arts,『Clear Fall Water』.
*Whomp!*
With a loud noise of impact, I cancelled out the force of her kick–
Again, Son’s eyes widened in shock.
In the meantime, my mobile shifted to the crook of my left arm.
「Please call Riko and Reki. My hands are a bit tied up at the moment.」
『Right! Just one minute! We’ll be there soon!』
Shirayuki’s shout… was loud enough I didn’t need my enhanced sense of hearing to understand it, and with my right hand *Clack!*
I closed my mobile on my left elbow and *Slip!* put it in my pocket.
I took the opportunity to wink at Son, and with a happy look on her face, she shuddered in excitement or fear.
If I had to say it looked more like arousal.
She likes strong men– I guess this acrobatic performance counts as a show of strength.
Does this girl have some weird fetish? But it’s not like I have room to talk…
Glancing around… I saw that another double-decker tram was approaching in the opposite lane.
The operator had already noticed the fight, and was staring wide-eyed. I’m sorry.
Drawing my gun–
「By the way, Son, I don’t think you’ve paid for your ticket. You really should step off. However, since it would be hard to do so here, I’ll get off first… you’ll have to excuse me for not allowing the lady to go first.」
Saying that, I paused for a second, no, I concentrated intently on my aim and… *Bang!*
I shot at the bumper of the oncoming tram.
With a *Fwing!* the bullet ricocheted into the first floor of our tram.
With a *Ching!*, I heard the bullet ricochet again inside the car, then…. *Click!* From memory, I recalled the layout of the operations panel and grazed the brake lever, bringing the tram to a halt.
–Blind L L8
With my increased sense of spatial awareness, I could use a shooting technique to hit something with a ricochet without having to see the target. This is the first time I’ve done so.
「Now for scene 3– let’s move to indoor combat. Please follow me, Miss Heroine.」
Decelerating, from the tram car continued to move forward under inertia–
I leapt onto the roof of the passing tramcar.
The from the tram car, I ducked into a department store through a window.
Seeing me use the passing car as a stepping stone…
「Hee hee! I thought you’d never ask!」
Son flashed a smile and *Whoosh!*
Stepping onto the tramcar, she vaulted across the space.
*******************************************************************************
Backing further into the building, I found that I had entered a third floor department store–
Whoops…!
Well, this was unfortunate, now wasn’t it?
The area forbidden to men, the mythical El Dorado– The women’s lingerie department.
Countless articles with designs more risque than Japanese styles stood out. Underwear in all colours stretched in every direction, making me dizzy.
From the luxurious carpet underfoot and the exquisite feminine design, it must have been a higher class shop.
Reacting to the high school boy that had backed into the shop through the window…
The clerks and the Hong Kong beauties that were shopping there stared at me with wide eyes.
「…Hello. Pardon the intrusion.」
Since I couldn’t communicate with words, for the time being, I flashed them a smile.
The thing I most wanted to say, but couldn’t was:『Leave, it’s dangerous here』–
But a shot toward the window that Son was about to enter conveyed the thought eloquently.
At the *Bang!* of my gun, the universal female scream of *Kyaa!* went up and they all hastily cleared the floor. Even those in the changing rooms ran out while still in their underwear. Please forgive me. After all, every film has at least one risque scene, so I hope that one day you can look back and laugh at this.
Having easily dodged my shot at that range, Son said:
「So you really are a pervert, like the rumours say, huh? Entering the most inappropriate shop possible!」
Son blushed angrily as she said this, perhaps having a complex about such lingerie that with her body she could never use.
「…It’s probably not very convincing, but I have to speak the truth. This was absolutely not my choice!」
Remembering I had said the same thing before, I had to smile bitterly–
Barefoot Son rushed forward, and with gun and fist, I took up a position to meet her for an Aru Kata fight.
As she ran, Son knocked over a coat rack, took the tubular pole, and with a *Whump!* turned toward me back first. She sprung up covering a lot of ground, with knees flexed and vaulted forward.
「–!」
With such speed and agility, even with her bold attack, I still lacked the time to pull the trigger. With a *Whoosh!*, she swung the steel rod and I moved out of the way, falling backward over a full table of underwear.
The moment her feet touched the floor, Son struck, kicking the table up into the air– Son jumped up on top of the table, and using the steel rod like a man-catcher, tried to pin me to the floor.
–Clever. Son is skilled with a staff.
Perhaps that is why the Nyoibou laser and the staff were mistaken for each other far back into history?
Still pinned to the floor– I kicked at the table Son stood on, breaking the legs, taking her balance, and free myself.
Falling from the table, Son rolled a carpet on floor.
「–Ha!」
As she began to stand, Son aimed a blow with the pole toward my head–
At the same time, I pulled with all my strength on the carpet underneath her with a wink. With a *Swish!*
「Kyaa!」
With both feet high in the air, Son fell on her butt dramatically.
With a crash, the pole she held fell impacted the ground next me, narrowly missing.
Ha ha! Until now you’ve been fighting like a demon, but you’re still a small girl. You don’t weigh much after all.
A smile rose to my face, then–
「–?」
I noticed that there was still one woman on the floor that had not sought refuge.
On the other side of the lingerie shop, near the sweets at the tills… A young clerk with braided hair was doing something.
The girl who looked like she could be AMBULANCE’s Tsugumi Soumiya’s older sister then:
「…!…」
From underneath the clear acrylic display case she took out a hidden Liuyedao– What in Japanese would be called a Seiryuutou9…!
But from her expression, it doesn’t look like she plans to use it to defend herself. While trembling, she made eye contact with Son.
–Now I understand.
She must be one of the many members or Rampan scattered throughout downtown Hong Kong.
「Kou-sama! Please use this!」
*Swoosh!*
The woman with the Seiryuutou was not far away, so I reached out– But using the pole, Son reached out and snagged the sword by the red tassel that dangled off of it.
Then Son cast aside the pole with a clatter.
「–Hee Hee! Since you’ve come all the way to China, I thought I’d let you try a bit of everything.」
In an expert display of skill she swung the sword around her, even passing it behind her back.
Hearing a noise, I turned back to look at the girl from earlier…
「–Haa, Haa…!」
In her tight skirt and high heels, she hardly seemed fit to fight in a melee, but despite that she brandished Shanjiegan–also known as nunchucks.
But I can tell she is a complete beginner. Her every move is slow.
「Shaa!」
She tried to imitate Bruce Lee’ famous stance, catching the one end of the nunchucks under her arm, but *Bonk!*
Missing, she hit herself on the back.
「Awaa!」
And collapsed. She tried to do something, but this happened.
In every Hong Kong Kung Fu film, there’s always a Sammo Han Kimpo-esque10 role responsible for the comedy.
Son and I watch silently for a while…
The woman had discarded her nunchucks and was making a staggering escape, leaving her back totally exposed.
…Without having done anything, it seems this member of Rampan was defeated.
「Uh…well… Sorry about that. It seems the Shanjiegan have been cancelled.」
「Well, in that case, can I use them instead?」
「Can you!?」
「At school… in ASSAULT I had a 3 hour course in nunchucks and triple staff. The instructor was from Hong Kong.」
Speaking those glib words, I picked up the nunchucks.
Taking the oak ends in each of my hands, I held them across my body–
But it was just for show.
「Well then. To make up for my colleague’s disgraceful display, I’ll give you that favour, Tohyama.」
Amidst the scattered lingerie, strewn like a field of flowers, Son plopped down on her side like she watching television with the Seiryutou still grasped in one hand.
「Now don’t you run away. I’d be disgraced.」
Son said, looking relaxed.
「Don’t worry. In Japan we have a saying:『It’s a man’s shame to not eat the meal set before him.』It wouldn’t be cool to abandon the woman in front of me.」
Given this chance… *Whoosh!*
Closing the distance…
Taking a page out of Son’s book, I leapt up and struck low.
Nunchucks have more power than their appearance would suggest. With the centrifugal force generated, the end of the rod would move and impact faster than a staff.
「–Hee hee!」
But my attack was met by her blade.
Rotating her whole body like a roulette wheel as she laid on the ground, she calmly deflected my attack and counterattacked, swinging her blade in attempt to sever my ankles.
–But I anticipated the movement.
At a glance, she might seem defenceless, but it was part of a Chinese martial art– Diquan11.
This set of martial arts techniques was developed to attack a standing enemy from a position on the ground and requires many long hours of diligent study. Thank goodness I was aware of it. It truly was no loss to have learned this lesson so well from ASSAULT’s ‘Die die’ group.
It seems Son had mastered this unusual fighting style–
I dodged the lightning kick she unleashed from the ground.
「…!」
Then taking advantage of my inexperience with the nunchucks, *Cling!*
She struck out with her sword at the weapon’s weak point–the chain–destroying it.
Now all I held were two wooden sticks–and having anticipated this situation–with a *Clack!* I caught and trapped her sword between them.
Then I slammed the side of the blade against my knees with all my strength.
*Crack!*
–I snapped it.
In contrast to Japanese swords that are painstakingly forged layer by layer, Chinese blades are mass produced by casting. Beautifully engraved and decorated with a tassel, without being forged they are very brittle.
This was my plan when I picked up the nunchucks–
But having seemingly anticipated things even further Son:
「–Die!」
Grabbing the tip of the sword from out of the air, she immediately hurled it at me like a shuriken.
「–Augh!」
Having little experience dodging object thrown from beneath me, my dodging maneuver was quite exaggerated.
Taking advantage of that opening, Son reached up and grabbed the lapels of my blazer with the toes of both feet, using them as nimbly as if they were hands.
Then with superhuman leg strength–
Pulled herself close and wrapped her legs around me.
「–!」
With a *Thud!* I fell with both my arms wrapped around Son’s back… and Son’s legs still wrapped around my waist.
Locked in unarmed combat, she tried to take a guard position, but… since a girl was doing it… it was a maddeningly embarrassing situation I never would have dreamed of otherwise.
Mounted on top, Son looked very pleased as she squeezed her legs tighter in a very unlady-like manuevre, drawing my head in closer.
「Is this what they call the ‘Daishuki Hold’12?」
「How the heck do you know Japanese words that even I don’t know, Son!?」
Lifting my upper torso away from her, I immediately tried to drive down with a shoulder attack.
「Hee hee!」
Pushing up off the floor with her tail, Son flew up past my waist…
Then she clamped down on my right arm and locked out my elbow.
Sliding her body up in a upside-down cross legged position, she used her thighs and crotch to envelop my head.
It was a Triangle Choke, no– It was too shallow.
The original technique was meant to cut off the carotid artery, but she is gripping my head.
Additionally, in this somewhat embarrassing position, my mouth and nose are blocked by Son’s crotch.
「Tohyama. You are a fairly entertaining man, but no more than ‘fairly’. My Dulou Jian Jian Jao13 is the perfect end for you. I hate weak men. Your insufficient intuition and inability to devise countermeasures disappoints me. How about I finish you? Right here? 」
…!?
*Squeeze!*…! *Squeeze!*…!
No, this is different. It isn’t a Triangle Choke or some other textbook technique. It’s probably some kind of secret Chinese Kempo technique.
Swiftly immobilise your opponent’s arm, cut off their breathing with your crotch– Then finally, crush their head…!
「Die in this lingerie shop, like the Womaniser you are, with your brains scattered beneath a skirt, Tohyama.」
Ordinarily, such a hold wouldn’t be a problem. There are any number of ways to escape.
But that assumes that your opponent is human. Son’s leg strength is superhuman.
I-I can’t escape Son’s thighs!
*Squeeze!* *Squeeze!*… I could hear my cranial plates grating against each other…
「Three, twoooo, one!」
Just as she was about to pour all her strength into her legs:
*Clang!*
–Accompanied by the rattle of chains, the lock on my arm was released.
「–!」
Thanks to that, I was able to extract my head from between her legs.
–That was close! If I had stayed there for one more second, my head would have split like a watermelon.
Looking up, I saw chains with a counterweight on the the end wrapped around Son’s neck–
The chains extended from the third floor shop to the stairs near a flower shop across the street.
Holding the end of the chain attached to the sword steel forged sickle:
「Wh-what kind of… enviable, shameless things are you doing with Kin-chan…!」
It was my ally Shirayuki–or at least I hoped she was my ally–the light having drained from her eyes at the sight of Son and me in such an compromising position.
「Sh-Shirayuki! You saved me! We were fighting, but you might not have seen that before we got into that complicated situation…」
As I stuttered an explanation, from on top of me as she unwound the counter-weighted chain from her arm–
–Son also looked toward Shirayuki.
「Is she your mistress? What a real Japanese beauty!」
In one instant, she said the most dangerous word…! No!!!
「M-m-mistress..!? Is that what you think of meeeeeeeee–!!!」
*Thunk!*
Shirayuki sent the sickle thudding into the floor.
*Rustle!*
She drew out a long, looong ammunition belt from her uniform with a *Ka-Ching!* Then, as if she had given birth to it, a piece of iron appeared in the space between her feet– It unfolded and reshaped itself into an M-60 machine gun!
「!」
Son and I, entangled in a forest of lingerie, scattered!
With strangely coordinated timing, we dodged right and left–
I dove into a nearby pharmacy, and Son sought cover behind the till in the women’s clothing section.
「–Wa~sshoi! Wa~sshoi!」
Leaving aside the fact that she was using a traditional festival chant, with each『Wa~sshoi』, Shirayuki hitched up her sleeves with a 100 bullet ammuntion belt–
*Chung!*
She snapped up the M-60 in a spring-loaded action like a Monster Hunter Gunlance.
With a *Ka-Chunk!*, She loaded the first bullet on the chain into machine gun.
「Diviiiiiiiine Puuuuuuunishmeeeeeeeeent!!!」
–*Tatatatatatatatatatatatatata!*
A storm of 7.62×51mm NATO bullets burst into the shop interior as the Hong Kong action film changed into a Hollywood war film.
It seems that seeing Son and me in such a posture was enough for her to switch over to Kuroyuki.
「Ahahahaha!!! Those kinds of enviable, shameless things! It’s fine, isn’t it fine! Even though you didn’t want to do them with me! Isn’t that right! Isn’t that right, Kin-chan!」
Ripping off the melody from『Doreamon’s Song』and『Hey Moomin!』, Shirayuki swung the M60, laughing as Son dodged here and there.
*Ping!* *Ping!* *Ping!* *Ping!* *Ping!* Five mannequins’ heads in a row were hit one after another and shattered on the floor. The barrage reached a liquor shop and its sake bottles and wine sparyed liquid like blood from a wound. Crap… how many HKD in damages is this going to be?
「Ahaha! Ahahahahahahahaha–!」
Scattering brass shell casings around, Shirayuki laughed loudly amidst the blooming mist of shattering debris.
「–Tee Hee! As I thought, your woman is amazing!」
Son shouted as she trampled the broken mannequins.
Leaping toward the chandelier above the women’s department till, Son knocked it down with clawed hands and kicked it toward Shirayuki– And it shattered with a crash…!
「Sh-Shirayuki..!」
Just as I worried about her being buried under an avalance of bouquets from the flower shop shelves–*Pop!*
An M60 barrel stuck out of the small mountain of flowers.
Then *Tatatatatatatata!* Shirayuki unleashed a barrage even as she lay prone.
You’re a stubborn woman, Shirayuki…!
「What a stubborn woman!」
It seems Son had the same thought I did, to which:
「A woman should be persistent!」
Shirayuki screeched from her fortress of flowers…
*Clang!*… *Click!* *Click!* *Click!*
The firestorm stopped.
Standing up from where I had lain facedown in the pharmacy…*Whoosh!*
Shirayuki had also come to her feet– Emerging from the mountain of flowers with a katana in hand.
「Kin-chan–Son is a monkey–not human! What I do form now on is monkey extermination, not murder. Fufufu–Oh Divine Thunderbolt! Cleanse and Purify!14–Die!」
*Whoosh!* *Whoosh!*
Shirayuki raised Irokaneayame into a hassou stance above the pile of flowers.
Sh-she plans to kill her!
In Kuroyuki-mode, she might actually do it.
Her overwhelming desire was filling the air.
But– I had learned something in my battle with Son.
We should not deal with Son by killing her.
「W-wait, Shirayuki…! Son is–」
Even as I felt it was useless, I tried to persuade her.
「Die! Die! Monkey extermination! Monkey extermination! Exterminate, Hotogi miko!」
She showed me it was as useless as I thought.
Son, for her part–will have surely picked up on her murderous intent and will want to fight her.
Turning toward them in order to find some way of mediating between them…
–Son was frozen in shock.
「Ahh…The girl who wields the Irokane blade…If she has harnessed its power… this must be the Himiko! Ayee!」
Beads of sweat broke out on her forehead as she mumbled these strange words and edged back.
Until now she had been belligerant, but now she harboured doubts about her own fighting ability.
By no means had she lost the will to fight, but her face showed that she was now cautious about a battle with Shirayuki.
…?
As I furrowed my eybrows at this new state of affairs–
*Beeeep!* *Beeep!* *Beep!* *Beep!* *Beep!* *Beeep!*–
*Beeep!* *Beep!* *Beep!* *Beep!*
From down in front of the shop came the intermittent sound of a car horn.
That noise that sounded like someone was playing with the horn– was Morse Code.
Translating it inside my head…『Riko Riko-rin-rin』… it said.
A girl who could further complicate the situation had arrived.
But this could be my chance.
Riko is sounding the horn from the driver’s seat, and it could be an excellent means of escape.
The 30 minutes I had promised Son are almost up, so– we should retreat. For now.
But… Shirayuki will not stop.
「Shirayuki, that’s enough! Retreat! Son might use her Nyoibou…!」
As I ran toward her, I tried once more to persuade her.
「Kin-chan step aside, if you don’t I can’t kill her! I have been prepared to die since the beginning!」
She was in the same state as the time she came to my room to kill Aria, I stepped in front of her and–
–*Clap!*
I clapped my hands in front of her face to disorient her.
Then I scooped her up in my arms.
「–Shirayuki. God would never forgive me if allowed you to die before our love had blossomed.」
Still holding her sword, I quickly used『Kotou』15whispering into her ear…
All at once, Shirayuki was enchanted.
Kuroyuki was changing back to Shirayuki as she looked up to me from my arms.
「Come now, smile. It grieves me to see you trembiling in rage. But the one who can always soothe my grief is you– Shirayuki. So won’t you smile for me?」
If this were a film, the audience would have been put off by that cheesy line, but Shirayuki thinks everything about me is amazing. Her devotion to me is as fanatical as that for a film star whose film she would go see no matter how bad it was. Then…
「–Yes!」
Waaah…! It’s scary just how quickly she completely reversed expression. Now she was smiling brightly at me from inside my arms.
I grown rather skilled at controlling her, despite the fact we have reached the point of a paired comedy act16.
I gave a wry smile, still carrying her in my arms–
And I rushed over to the window where I had heard Riko honking the horn.
「Oi– Tohyama!」
Son shouted at my back.
But the 30 minutes had passed. I’ve spent enough time playing with you. An extension would be expensive, don’t you know?
I wanted to make a cool exit without looking back.
Then–
–During our battle, I’ve come to understand you, Son. Understand what kind of person you are. If only in part.
Hysteria Mode’s original purpose was to leave behind offspring.
But for those offspring to appear, a woman must accept a man unconditionally, with all her heart.
So… while in Hysteria Mode, I am sensitive to girls’ true feelings. I am able to see deep, deep into their true feelings– That is their heart.
Son– You are not yourself.
You are not here right now.
Your true self–is far away from Kou’s body that someone far away is controlling like a puppet.
It wasn’t Koko, Shokatsu, or Patra; it’s someone else. The real person behind Son–the one whose heart I should be accepting–is somewhere else.
I understood that…and I saw what I had to do for her.
It was not to fight her.
–But save her.
Expel Son so that only Kou remains.
Obviously, I’m nothing like a psychiatrist, and I don’t know what exactly should be done. But the two of us were destined to become each other’s enemy and fight. The difficult situation seems impossible to solve.
Even so, rest assured.
I am『The Enabler』, and as my nickname says, I’ve made many impossible things possible.
Now I will take up this challenge in order to save you.
Why would I save my opponent–You might ask? There are three reasons:
1. Because you are a girl–
2. I am a man.
And 3. Saving women is a man’s responsibility. Isn’t it?
[END CHAPTER FIVE]
(END TEXT)
*************************************************************************
1. A type of military APC: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alvis_Saracen
2. A Hong Kong Horror Comedy film franchise.
3. This is the same ‘Ran’ as in Rampan.
4. The family name of the Cao clan, the Koko sisters’ famous ancestor.
5. As you may recall, the kanji for ‘Enabler’ means ‘the one who makes the impossible possible’ thus the joke.
6. Zetsurou is written in kanji as ‘Absolute prison’.
7. Detective Conan Reference.
8. The name refere=s to the shape of the trajectory of the bullet, zig-zagging in two ‘L-shaped’ segments as it ricochets.
9. A type of Chinese sword with a heavy tip similar to a saber or cutlass.
10. Semi-famous martial arts film instructor, trainer, and stuntman.
11. Chinese for ‘Ground Fist’. A set of techniques meant for use when the practitioner is lying on the ground. ‘Chitouken’ in Japanese.
12. Seems to be a corruption of: ‘Daisuki’, so it should be meaning something like ‘Lover’s Embrace’.
13. Means ‘Skull Leg Shears’ in Chinese.
14. Rough translation of a Bhuddist mantra invoking some kind of war deity or aspect.
15. ‘Charming Call’ in kanji.
16.m’Manzai’ in the original. A traditional style of stand-up comedy in Japanese culture, which usually involves two performers (manzaishi)—a straight man and a funny man— trading jokes at great speed. Most of the jokes revolve around mutual misunderstandings, double-talk, puns and other verbal gags– Wikipedia
Chapter 4: Kowloon Monkey King– Kowloon Monk
「Good evening. Do you have a room?」「How much for a night?」「I’ll stay the night.」
Pointing to the few Chinese phrases I had copied from Shirayuki’s guidebook into my Butei handbook– I managed to check myself into a cramped business hotel in the Sheung Wan district in about 15 minutes.
In order to avoid having my valuables stolen again, I left everything in the complimentary room safe.
Then with weapons, cash, and passport in hand, I set out once more.
In accordance with our standing strategy (Half of which Reki had contributed), I walked through downtown Hong Kong.
The plan was the same as yesterday, but this time it’s different: I’m prepared.
According to the messages I received on my recovered mobile, Shirayuki was in Wan Chai and Riko was in Causeway Bay recommencing Operation Barley.
Baskerville was split into the Team Aria and Team Kinji, but Reki slipped me a message that:「Everything is fine over here.」
Everything should be fine in Kowloon.
Rounding a street corner…
*Bang!* *Bang!* *Bang!*
I turned toward the gunshot-like sounds… but they were firecrackers.
Because of the warm weather, it didn’t immediately spring to mind that Christmas and New Year’s were coming up. Those sounds must have been a test for the upcoming celebrations.
As I was waiting at a traffic light in front of a sports supply store, several children were pestering their parents for skateboards. Piled haphazardly in a bin in front of the shop, they were selling well. It seems that the Christmas sales rush is the same in every country.
(I can’t understand the words… but they must be asking for them as presents.)
As I cast a smiling glance back at the parents and children…
*Bam!* *Screech!*
A double-decker tram car came to a halt across the intersection. It was covered in a Christmas-themed design, and although it was only a short distance in front of me, we were separated by a large billboard.
From the tram car:
*Waaah!* *Haha!*
A group of chattering students from a girls’ school just got off.
…Oh! That white uniform. I’ve seen it before. It’s the same as the one Yuan was wearing.
As I had that thought…
*Bam!* *Screech!*
「…!?」
Another tram car with Kung-Fu Panda dressed as Santa on it screeched to a stop, and even more girls in school uniforms flooded out.
What the–!
That’s strange.
The girls in white uniforms were laughing and chattering, but aren’t there a bit too many of them…?
Just now 30 of them got off one tram. Is this normal in China?
No, they’re still coming.
Not just from the doors, but they are also popping out from the windows as well. This is definitely not normal.
Looking around, I’m surrounded by about 100 girls in white uniforms. Now that I look closer, even the tram operators are schoolgirls wearing the same uniform.
As I tried to put up my guard, from the left…
*Rrrrr!* *Rrrrr!*
–!
….A….FV603 Saracen…!1
An HKPF armoured vehicle was lumbering forward!
The FV603 is a six-wheeled armoured attack vehicle. It saw action in Northern Ireland, and its armour is strong enough to repel even military machine gun fire.
It has an M1919 machine gun mounted on top of a rotating turret, and from space within the rounded Type-97 tank tube antenna…
*Click!*
The hatch opened, and with black hair secured in two twin-tails with round hair ornaments–
「–Koko…!」
An alternatively coloured version of Aria, Rampan’s Koko appeared…!
Wearing glasses and carrying a golden megaphone she said:
「Attention! Attention! Recording for a film will begin here shortly. For your own safety we ask that all persons vacate the area.」
Announcing something in Chinese… everyone nearby quickly cleared the area. Except for the white uniformed school girls.
It was clear that these girls were cooperating with Koko… they must be students at one of the Rampan funded schools that Riko told me about. Huh!? So that means even Yuan…!?
Before I even had the time to complete that thought, Koko had already finished clearing the area of people and said–
「–Kinchi! Hawve you been taking care of my older shister in Jawpan?」
With only her top half exposed, she pointed her megaphone toward me and shouted in lisping Japanese.
She was still wearing a Qing Dynasty era Chinese noble’s clothes like something from『Mr. Vampire』2.
Hers were pink and gold, though.
「We’ve had ouwr eyes on you the whole time you’wve been wandering awound Hong Kong! There’s been pwenty of time to see to our defewnces! Beating Awia and Kinchi together would be a pwoblem. Fwighting Reki would awlso be hawd– I, Jinyang, hawve learned that from my older sisters: Juujuu, Paonyang and Meimei! But Awia is not here and Kinchi is alone! It shouwld’nt be a pwoblem!」
Saying that… Koko raised her eyebrows. But she did not get out of the armoured car.
Her attitude is hostile. Extremely so. It seems that the peace proposal I left with Kou hasn’t reached her yet.
However… They’ve brought in an APC to bring me down. They’ve spent a lot of time and money. What’s going to show up next, a tank?
「…!」
As I assessed the trouble facing me, the white uniformed school girls surrounded me with a human wall and were gradually closing in.
With me at the centre of their ring, their ranks thickened as they converged. Beyond the crowd to my right, the way was blocked by the tram car, and to the left, the APC. To my rear was a multi-level building.
–I’m surrounded. It would be hard to escape from this concentric encirclement.
「Koko! I have to warn you! I don’t know which Koko you are, but if you’re a part of Rampan, you should know! The rules of FEW are that victory and defeat are decided by duels. None of these girls look like they could handle that. Surrounding your enemy with civilians is against the rules!」
「Fu! Fu! What ruwles!」
Mocking me, Koko stuck out her tongue and pulled down one of her adorable almond-shaped eyes.
「Evwy encounter has its own ruwles. Now I’ve just decided on new ruwles!」
She said, completely disregarding the rules. If that’s how it is, then why the hell even bother having rules at all!
I wonder if this is being done with the assent of the whole organisation, or if it was the blood-revenge of the fourth Koko– Jinyang, was it? She might be taking rash action on her own, but I don’t know.
「In war you have to fight awot of pweople! Overwhelming numbwers is the most basic techniwque!」
「But… even so, the people you are using are just girls…!」
Bewildered by the fact that the enemy would completely abandon the rules, the white uniformed girls drew their ring tighter and tighter.
As they got closer… What’s this I notice? They’re all cute!
Because they’re all shorter than the average Japanese person, many of them are quite petite, but they all have nice figures.
「These giwls are students at Ran Girl’s Highschool3. I knew you were bad with giwls, Kinchi. I prepawed a situation I just knew you’d wove. Get him! Hee! Hee!」
Giving that order in a shrill voice, Koko flourished a red folding fan with the『曹』character4 in black.
Taking that signal, the girls all squealed *Kyaaaaa!*
Still shrieking, they surged toward me.
「–Wait…!」
I shrunk back against the sport supply store, and in an instant, I was trapped– And we were instantly jammed together: like a musician mobbed by their fans.
S-so this is the kind of situation you think I enjoy? I’m disappointed.
「By the way, Kinchi, don’t you know? It was witten in the Hiwokane Inwestigation. Iwokane is–」
Koko said. Then with a *Fwoosh!* she covered her lips with the fan. Her narrowed eyes said:『Oh, maybe I shouldn’t say!』
「…?」
As she dropped that hint, my eyebrows furrowed, but… right then, I didn’t process all of what she said.
Still smiling, from every direction, the girls reached out their hands and held down one of my hands, arms or legs.
「H-Hey…! That feels weird! Stop it!」
I tried to resist, but each of my arms and legs had 3 or 4 girls holding them down. I literally could not move hand or foot.
The Koko with glasses continued:
「Of the four Koko shisters, I am the most meticuwous. Kinchi, you are a man whose actions cannot be pwedicted. I have carefuwy stwipped away your defences. Hee hee!」
She said as she remained half hidden inside the APC.
First of all, it’s impossible for me to escape this sea of girls– Even if I could, their commander is protected by more than 10 mm of armour plating on the FV603 Saracen. My gun wouldn’t even make a dent in it.
Continuing to squeal as they held me down– The beautiful girls first took my gun, then my knife. While they were doing that, there were a few hands that tickled the back of my neck. I-It’s truly hopeless.
「Now then, Kinchi, will you suwender? If you do, I’ll give you awl these giwls. It a time-honoured stwatgey to seduce enemy commanders. If they’re not enough, I’ll giwve you a hundwed more. Fwom now on you’re sure to be a piece on the board for the Koko!」
「…Wha… how stupid…!」
In the press of girls, I could do nothing but be struck dumb in amazement.
So this is the kind of enemy you meet when you step outside of Japan, huh?
Rampan must be trying to lure me into their organisation with this show of force. A Japanese person would never anticipate this kind of high-handed action. There’s also their organisational abilities to consider. I hadn’t treated them any different than any other opponent I had faced, and so I was unable to react.
–This is totally foreign.
Japanese common sense never applied here, but I’ve used it from the beginning and thought just like a Japanese person would.
I acted on the assumption that the enemy would respect the rules of war, and having caught an enemy combatant, released her, thinking to open a dialogue for peaceful negotiations.
But– It was all for nothing. Not a single thing I did worked. I was narrow minded in planning my strategy.
Despite all that, I over eagerly rushed into a foreign assault–
They successfully struck at my weakness, and this is the result.
I was too slow in realising it. I’m caught, and these girls are able to keep me here.
「Koko…! Let’s talk…! Kou! Kou and I… We had an agreement…!」
I played my only trump card as I lay pinned down and–
With a *Snap!*, Koko closed the fan.
Then there was a loud clanging, then she gestured toward the hatch.
「Kou is right here!」
Wha… What…! She’s inside…!?
I seized the ray of hope that if she was here, there might be a chance to negotiate, but at that instant– There was a large crash.
A bare foot appeared above the personnel compartment hatch.
Then with a *Spring!*
A girl in the Nagoya High cutoff sailor suit uniform jumped out with a speed and power only possible in cartoons or video games.
「Kou…!」
Landing on the round bar-like antenna, she was…
…d-different.
I could sense it.
It was her body, but it wasn’t her.
It had to be– the other person…!
「Ha ha ha! To be more pwecise–The Kowloon Monk, Son Goku. You’wve met. Members of Rampan saw you. As soon as we heard, we uwsed『Patra’s Key』to change Kou into Son. But you had awready let her go as soon as you cawght her. If you had kept her, Son would hawve mopped you all nicely. What wasted opportuwnity!」
Next to Koko…
「Kuru kukuru karararoru.」
Kou, no… Son mumbled in her strange language.
With monkey-like agility and her long black hair streaming behind her…
*Whoosh!*
Sailor suit flapping so much I thought it might slip off, she dove into the sea of girls. It was like a musician taking a dive into the audience.
「…!」
In sync with her movements, the girls lifted their palms up above their heads, catching Son–
Son curled her body as if she were a huge ball being passed overhead for a Sports Festival event, headed my way.
Then the girls put their palms together, creating a space… and in the middle of the crowd– *Whish!* Son posed barefoot, looking like a classic Chinese Opera performer with red eyeshadow around her eyes.
「Korukararosu, ararasu, kuruararu」
–It wasn’t just the makeup. Her tone of voice and carriage were different than Kou’s. There was this unmatched and indescribable expression of transcendent quality to her.
I saw it for the first time of the roof of the Kagataka Family headquarters… it’s Son.
Kou could be reasoned with, but this person…
With Son…
Impossible. It was impressed upon me the instant we met. We don’t even speak the same language.
Opening their hands with perfect timing, the girls created footholds… She strode forward like a model walking on blossoming lily pads– One step following the other.
Surely this is Son Goku. Globally recognised fairy-tale character.
Human in appearance, but unearthly in attitude. And if it had to be put into words: beautiful. Striking in appearance, and completely captivating.
Trapped under the weight of girls, she drew closer to me and looking down–
*Flop!*
She laid down in the posture of a recumbent Buddha, supported by countless hands.
「Kuruhirirua」
A centimetre away, her childish face harbored a sharp glint in her eye.
The same right eye that shot G-3 is now in front of me…!
「Son–!」
The word reflexively escaped my mouth–
–*Lick!*
She licked me.
Then she pressed our lips together.
「…!」
I was frozen for a brief instant, but…
Thanks to my long association with the paranormal world, somehow I understood what had happened.
Just now she had used some magical technique. Our lips had touched, and the true reason for the action–
「Kou is so terrified, she can’t help it.」
I immediately recognised Son’s inflections when speaking Japanese were my own.
「Don’t look so surprised, Tohyama. Rest assured, I have merely transcribed your knowledge of modern Japanese language. I’ve never done it with a man before, so I wasn’t sure if it would work or not.」
Rolling over and cupping my head in her hands–
「Now then, Tohyama, shall we fight?」
She said, grinning, and I immediately wrenched my head to the side.
「Don’t worry. I like your looks. I won’t kill you right away with the Nyoibou.」
…Things are happening just like Kou said they would.
***********************************************
***********************************************
*Ka-Thump!*
At the feeling of blood flow, I gave a wry laugh at myself.
「–Son. You’ve challenged me to a duel as Rampan’s representative. Do I have that right?」
「Idiot. Take it however you want. This fight with you will be like fighting ants. Whatever you say. On that point, Koko and I agree.」
*Ka-Thump!*
It’s starting. I can feel it inside.
「–I like strong men. I just want to fight them. That fight with G-3 was a real shame. I was only half awake when I killed him.」
–I see! I’ve gained one piece of valuable intel.
Son still thinks that she killed G-3. In other words, Kou and Son can’t share information like Sayonaki and Vlad could..
The reason I could understand that was because it had happened: Hysteria Mode.
My goodness! I’m surprised at myself.
I went into Hysteria Mode over such a young thing– All over Kou who looks like a 5th year primary schooler.
She’s set a record for the youngest girl that has sent me into Hysteria Mode.
Come to think of it, Son has lived for over 1400 years, so wouldn’t that make her the oldest girl, I wonder?
「You want to fight me… huh? I never could refuse a woman. And so I must grant your request.」
With these Hysteria Mode infused words, I turned a smile toward Son.
As I am now– I am a knight solely devoted to womankind.
Alright. I will fight you. You are a proper Rampan soldier. The rules of war must not be be broken.
Furthermore, I don’t know you well.
A fight is a kind of communication. The act brings a deep, mutual understanding of each other.
I am honoured to be allowed to do so by such a world famous lady.
I will ascertain what kind of person you are. Using this fight.
But–
30 minutes.
In my current state, I’m a poison to girls. If I keep it up too long, they get addicted to that version of me, and I get all kinds of dangerous looks from them. Aria is a prime example.
So I set a time limit. Host clubs have no restrictions, but the Kinji Club has a limit.
Within that time-span, however, I am completely yours–
「–Come with me and I will show you your dreams.」
While still her prisoner, I smiled an invitation to her…
Son smiled, as pleased as if she had gotten the name of the number one host in a club.
「Now then, Son. Let us move on to the main course. But I must ask forgiveness for one thing. I would love nothing better than to take your hand to escort you. However–」
As I spoke, I had already put the bottom of one foot down on the ground– I placed the foot on one of the skateboards from the bin in front of the sports equipment shop.
Then sensing the flow of energy in the girls holding my arms…
「My hand will be occupied for the next 10 seconds due to a work responsibility. So I will be unable to do so.」
*Pop!* *Pop!* *Pop!*
Just like I did in the Ikebukuro High elevator with the『Transfer Student Couple’s Support Club』, I peeled them off one by one– Using their own power against them.
Leading them on, I had the girls holding on to each other to form a large ring with me in the centre.
「I’ve already had my things stolen in Hong Kong. Now I must take them back.」
The girls stared blankly at my prefatory remarks because I had spoken in Japanese.
I tucked my legs in with the skateboard on the ground underneath me.
Then kicking off the wall strongly–
I moved through the forest of fluttering skirts and legs, balancing from time to time on two wheels,
In the original technique, you would lay face down, and I adapted it for use on a skateboard… but this is an old Tohyama family secret technique:『Hidden Forest』.
It was originally designed to penetrate the ranks of horsemen and foot soldiers to kill the general that they were protecting by crawling between their legs like a snake.
Following the original technique, I would have cut their Achilles tendons, but… it would be a crime to harm these long, white, graceful legs– Each of them surpassing an exquisite work of art.
Instead of doing that, I used my hands to steal–to recover–what was mine.
My precious Beretta, butterfly knife, and scramsax.
I returned each to its respective holster, pocket, and concealed scabbard on my back as I escaped the world’s most beautiful forest and came to a screeching stop.
「Things should be kept in their proper place, don’t you think?」
Flipping up the skateboard with my toes, I winked as I now stood on the outside of the ring of girls.
All of the girls that had used human wave tactics against me were standing shocked as they held their skirts in place, but thanks to that, my Hysteria Mode only intensified.
「That’s right! Ha ha ha! How funny, Tohyama!」
Eyes wide in amazement, Son still stood supported on the hands of the girls as she turned toward me.
I’ve escaped the first circle and put it behind me.
Now then…
I began thinking how to escape the second ring– The wall created by the double-decker trams and APC.
First of all, on the left, I’m a little leery of having to deal with the APC.
Ahead of me and to my right the tram cars tower over 7 metres forming a high wall. Even in Hysteria Mode that would be hard to scale.
I have to change my thinking. I was thinking of them as walls, but– Fundamentally, they are still vehicles that move.
「If I recall correctly, it should be 2.3 HKD, right?」
Mumbling this to myself, I dashed into one of the unoccupied trams. As my left hand deposited the amount of the fare, my right reached for the operator’s platform.
Recollecting my ride yesterday, it was easy to figure out how to drive it.
With a heavy sounding *Ka-thunk!* the former wall lurched forward.
Alright! Now the tram will move by itself.
Because the tram won’t collide with the other, I set the speed to 10 KPH.
「Tohyamaaaa!!!」
From her cry, I could pinpoint Son’s position as she ran above the girls’ heads
It’s fine, I’m already moving. I know she’ll catch up anyway. I won’t change speed.
Looking back over my shoulder to see how much Son had caught up with me…
I saw all the girls who had surrounded me–without exception–were standing, staring in shock.
Their leader’s plans had never accounted for this, and they haven’t received any instructions.
Among them the most surprised face belonged to…
I thought she’d be here.
The one who had helped me yesterday in North Point, Yuan Meishi-chan.
I knew it the moment I saw that uniform that she attended one of Rampan’s schools. Yesterday she had told me that the school was looking for information on a specific person after all…
It seems that I was that person.
Her eyes seemed to say:「There’s no way such a stupid Japanese person is『The Enabler』!」as she looked at me– but that nickname is too much.
I’ve only done all kinds of things because Aria absurdly decreed:『You’re forbidden to say the word ‘impossible’.』Wouldn’t a more proper nickname be:『The man who is forbidden from impossibility.』, then?5
Ugh… I feel bad for myself.
Following the tracks, the car squealed loudly as it turned to the right…
「–Kinchi! You can’t escape!」
Koko shouted into her megaphone, now slightly angry.
Having seen where the tracks led, I chose this tram over the other one– This one went east and entered a narrow alleyway.
Your own plan backfired on you, Koko. You can’t follow me in that wide-bodied vehicle.
「…Son! Follow Kinchi!!」
Koko shouted, planning to circle around, and pushed the APC onto the main road.
「–Even if you didn’t say that, I was planning to!」
Shouting that…
*Tap!* *Tap!* *Tap!*
She started running, her cut-off sailor suit flapping all the while, and jumped onto the entryway of the slow moving tram car.
「Tohyama! It’s just the two of us! Let’s have some fun!」
「Being alone with a woman doesn’t sound bad to me.」
Saying that, I fell back to the passenger area of the tram.
*Pow!* *P-pow!* *Pow!*
The space inside the tram exploded with sound as Son unleashed a flurry of claw and heel-hand strikes.
One sharp blow rapidly followed another, and I got the feeling that if I suffered a direct hit, it’d be instantly fatal, but–
–I could see them, so it goes without saying that I avoided them.
There are handrails and many hanging straps inside here. Pulling off kicks would be difficult, and handwork would be cramped. But even so, I planned to fight here.
But… Son leapt up with a:「Hii!」grabbing a handrail in her right hand and a hanging strap in her left– Then with her body in a cruciform position,
*Pa!* *P-pa!* * Pa!*
More concussive sounds filled the air from her left and right feet, and even her tail, using them to unleash three more strikes.
On my side, I couldn’t exactly『dodge』because of the cramped space, so–
「–!」
So I crossed my arms and『received』them.
The impact was terrible, and pushed my whole body onto the stairs
S-she’s so small… but so strong.
If I hadn’t used『Kikka』, both my arms would have been torn off at the elbows.
「…Don’t you think you might want to hold back on the kicking in that short skirt of yours?」
I said, half jokingly, but I couldn’t follow that last attack– Using her tail to push off the wall, she obliqued her trajectory mid-air– At the same time she also let fly a spinning kick I received with my arms again.
The blow didn’t kill me, but the stairs were shattered under my feet.
S-She’s strong. The whole tram chassis groaned.
Son’s striking power was about 7 times greater than my『Ouka』or G-3’s『Meteor』.
Even with my repeated use of Kikka, I’m taking damage.
More properly speaking, it’s because I can’t move. In this space, I don’t have the room to evade.
「Tohyama! It’s no fun if you don’t try to hit me.」
Her orange tail coiled around a handrail, she dropped down from the level above, wearing an innocent looking smile– This cramped space doesn’t seem to be giving her any trouble at all, and she’s able to skillfully execute powerful strikes..
Like a monkey in the forest.
No, Son actually does possess monkey-like traits. From past experiences, I know there are a lot of those with animal-like qualities, such as Tamamo the fox and Hilda the bat.
Fighting in close quarters inside the tram, I’m at a disadvantage…!
Retreating to the second floor, I hung out through the window, looking for a temporary hiding place–
「–!」
Just then, another tram coming the opposite way whizzed by, almost hitting me and causing me to stumble back inside.
I-if the sides are not good then–
–I have to go up
I have nowhere else left to run…!
Pulling my body out the second level rear window, I pulled myself up to the roof with two hands–
「…?」
And was greeted by the murmuring of a crowd from all around us.
Looking around… All through the alleyway Hong Kong residents were looking on bemused. From the rows of condominiums more faces peered out, all smiling.
It looks like they think this is an actual film shoot.
「Amazing! You really know Hong Kong well, don’t you, Kinji Tohyama? You even have an audience.」
Son addressed me as she clambered up the roof from the front window.
「…I don’t really understand the reason for their cheering.」
It seems like I’m being given time to catch my breath…
「Moving a fight from inside to outside and having fast-paced hand-to-hand combat are staples of Hong Kong cinema.」
Son said, indicating the happily grinning gallery–
Perhaps slightly annoyed, she crossed her arms in front of her slightly developed chest.
「Ohh!…Now I get it! I love Hong Kong action films!」
Now the surroundings are very different than the cramped interior of the tram.
I have a wider range of freedom for offensive and defensive action.
Or so I thought…but in it’s own way, this place is confining as well.
Things could get difficult if the fight goes on much longer because of something Hong Kong is famous for:
The countless number of signs, neon Kanji lights, and signboards hanging overhead.
Billboards of all colours and sizes hung at irregular heights were quickly approaching. More accurately, it was the tram that was approaching the signs under its own power.
The signs have passed over our heads until now, but they can’t be entirely discounted because there are many signs that will graze the roof of the tram. Things will turn into some kind of acrobatic performance if things go on.
「Hee Hee! Let’s give them a show! Scene 2 Take 5: Kung Fu Action Atop a Moving Tram. You don’t want to let the audience down, do you? I’ll scatter your flesh and blood like a shower of cherry blossoms.」
Cheerfully, Son bent her elbow at 90 degrees and took a stance with her palm toward heaven, legs bent, hips low–
*Whish!* *Whish!* *Whoosh!*
It was a slightly intriguing Kung Fu stance.
Beautiful. Perfect posture. Southern Shaolin Kung Fu.
Of all the numerous Chinese martial arts to choose to use in a close quarters fight atop this shaking vehicle, she has chosen wisely.
…However, this is no time to be praising the beautiful girl that is my opponent.
I still have to come up with some way to deal with those devastating attacks.
「If you think you can scatter the petals of the Tohyama cherry tree– Come and try.」
So… I took up the stance for『Zetsurou』–
As I thought, the locals were under the misunderstanding that this was a film shoot and everyone…
*Raaaaah!*
From every level of every building, cheers rang out.
As Son and I squared off, all around us a mass of brightly coloured signs skimmed past us one after another.
With a rumbling sound echoing through the darkening sky– An Air China flight on a low approach unique to Hong Kong skimmed the rooftops.
From one of the buildings, someone stuck out a wok as a substitute for a gong, striking it with a *Bong!*–
Signalling the start of Son’s and my second round of hand-to-hand action.
[END CHAPTER FOUR]
************************************
Chapter 5
[BEGIN CHAPTER FIVE]
The first sign to skim past was a wide『Tenkorou Ltd.』sign hanging at chest height– Son back-flipped and I ducked to avoid it.
Taking advantage of the instant my field of view was obstructed, Son– *Pa!*
Crossed the 9 metres from the front to the back of the tram in a single leap.
It looked like wire-work, because it covered a distance that common sense dictated was impossible.
The instant she landed, Son struck, *Bam!* and kicked up toward the sky in a Kung Fu movement.
–Zetsurou!
Even with all these people watching me, I turned my body into a revolving door and received her attack with the Tohyama family secret technique.
Using the densest part of my body–absorbing the power of her bare heeled kick– And that instant, I switched from defence to offense.
–*Ba!* Using Son’s kick, I kicked myself back into a somersault– A move that even G-3 at 100 times acceleration is Hysteria Mode couldn’t track, and capturing–
「–Eh!」
Son noticed and responded.
Crossing her arms over her chest and abdomen, she cut the power of my attack in half, dispersing it with her arms. She took damage, but it was minor.
W-what reflexes! I am fighting a non-human after all.
It seems my prison is not so ‘absolute’6. Because of the shaking of the tram, my balance wasn’t centred. But that’s just self-consolation talking because I didn’t want to believe my secret technique had been seen through.
「–!」
Pushed back to the front of the tram by the force of my attack, Son looked slightly surprised.
She must have never expected that a human was capable of such a thing, forcing her to fall back on the defensive for a moment.
–*Lick!*
Licking her lips, her mouth formed into a grinning smile.
「…Not bad, Tohyama. You’re full of surprises.」
With seeming perfect assurance of the knowledge of what was behind her, Son leapt up over the approaching signboard– Twisting her body on the other side she struck, and kicked the sign toward me.
As I turned to dodge the flying Coca-Cola sign, Son jumped off the tram and pushed off the side of the building in a kick– *Bam!*
–!
Barely sidestepping, the flying kick grazed past my hair.
With a *Pa!*, Son caught herself with her toes, balancing on another sign and leapt back toward me. Turning her whole body into a projectile, she tried to collide with me. I tried to catch her and perform a throw– But her body had an unnatural lift that allowed her to escape my grasp. She caught herself on another overhead sign board and hung from a iron bar by her tail.
Then she dropped down, trying to shred my body with another barefoot kick.
What’s with this 3-D battle? It’s like a gymnastics exhibition!
「–Spinning Ax–!」
Landing in a handstand, she supported herself on crossed hands–
Uncrossing her arms, she spun herself around.
In less than one second, she unleashed a three part attack with her right foot, left foot, and tail directed at my abdomen.
It was devastating. If I hadn’t dodged it at the last possible moment, I would have been cut in half.
Backing up to the edge of the roof to create some distance, I:
「…Son. Uh… Do you think you could hold back a bit? You skirt and blouse are very short after all.」
I asked while trying to hide the cold sweat that had broken out–
Rotating in her handstand, she arched herself backward onto her feet like a gymnast and faced me with a grin. Like Tamamo had done, she shaped her tail into a『?』shape.
「Tohyama, you certainly… don’t think of my body as a woman’s? This body stopped developing at the age of 10. Look, it’s a child’s!」
Son turned her buttocks toward me and slapped them to show me. Then turning only her head back, made an akanbe face at me.
Just like a primary schooler teasing a highschooler.
「…What about that, Tohyama?」
「Even though you say that…」
Her behaviour though… Is that of a woman, and it stirs up male feelings.
Is this what you’d call: The body of a child and the mind of an adult?7 It’s applicable to Son.
It must be like a shorter, older woman… Yeah, that fits. I don’t dislike them, after all.
Normally, I wouldn’t like talking about such things, but… right now, I need some reasons to buy time.
The girls of CVR use their gender– And I will do the same thing.
「…Men have an unreasoning reaction to female affection. You may have heard from Koko but my performance in battle depends on it.」
「Well then how is it going? What’s your reaction to me?」
「Not bad. You might be my type.」
The tram has been moving for 2, maybe 3 minutes..
「…Your taste makes me bit nervous, but I’m happy to be treated as a woman. In all 2000 years of life, I’ve never even been slightly wanted.」
As her skirt ruffled in the wind, Son looked pleased.
「…but are you sure you really want someone like me?」
She looked down at her non-existent chest and the line of her legs.
She was a girl that, until now, had never been wanted, yet yearned for love…
But now, meeting a man who told her he liked her as she was, she had an expression of disbelief as she trembled.
「–Women are women from the day they are born. They are the flowers that adorn the world. It is a basic human instinct to cherish them, so my older brother… er… older sister… er, brother taught me. So I love you.」
While I whispered these half understood sweet nothings–
I was secretly operating my mobile in the hand held behind my back.
「…I-I’m warning you! Older women are scary if you play with our feelings. I’ll give you the cruelest torture in all China then finish you off with the Nyoibou.」
Son blushed an appropriate shade of red to match the colour of the terribly bloody statement.
「Now that we’ve reached this point…let me introduce you to my other, lovable flowers– My girlfriends.」
「Cheating already!?」
「It’s part of life.」
As I said that…
Because of my response, Son finally realised I was using my mobile behind my back.
「–Hey, Tohyama– Don’t call your friends. You want more dead bodies?」
But I had already been given enough time to make the call.
「Son, you should have listened when I warned you about fighting in those scandalous clothes… Because of that, my blood flow has increased– I’ve gotten stronger.」
I sense it in my core, alongside a feeling of heat.
At the start, my Hysteria Mode was confused by the moral quandary presented by Son’s childish appearance, but… now that I know she is older, the obstacle has suddenly been removed. I do have a preference for older women, after all.
「Now then, I’ll give you a fun fact about Japanese culture. Japanese love their mobiles. So much that we can do anything while using them.」
「Anything? Alright, then I’ll attack you again. That way you’ll need to use both hands.」
「Come on. Check out my hands-free style.」
I was already connected to Shirayuki, so I tossed my mobile through the gap between billboards–
Son rushed me and using both feet and legs, began a flurry of blows.
*Bam!* *Pow!* Whomp!*
One heavy blow after another. But my Kikka worked admirably. 2 or 3 times, I was also able to use Zetsurou and turn her attack back on her, and she frowned at the inexplicable technique.
While fighting Son Goku and dodging groups of hanging signs–
「Hello? Shirayuki?」
*Bounce!* *Bounce!*
My mobile fell from the sky, and keepie-uppie-ing it, I spoke to Shirayuki.
『Kin-chan?』
「I met an enemy. They’re harassing me right now.」
『Eeeeh!?』
Son aimed a roundhouse at my head, and I ducked–
I rolled my head back around to continue speaking normally.
With my Hysteria Mode reasoning, I then said:
「Turn onto Hennessy Road from Admiralty Road, then follow the tram tracks.」
The ICC looks down on Hong Kong, providing a bird’s eye view. Combine that with her memory of the GPS map I showed her yesterday, Shirayuki should be able to follow the route.
Shirayuki is in the Wan Chai area looking for Rampan, and this tram is headed in that direction. I planned to meet up from the start when I planned my escape. The tram was rumbling right along, all I needed was time, and at the end we’d get there.
「–Haaa!」
Son cried as she unleashed a kick that almost completely exposed her backside–
Sensing the beginning of her movement and seizing the initiative, I executed a one-inch punch taken from Chinese Martial Arts,『Clear Fall Water』.
*Whomp!*
With a loud noise of impact, I cancelled out the force of her kick–
Again, Son’s eyes widened in shock.
In the meantime, my mobile shifted to the crook of my left arm.
「Please call Riko and Reki. My hands are a bit tied up at the moment.」
『Right! Just one minute! We’ll be there soon!』
Shirayuki’s shout… was loud enough I didn’t need my enhanced sense of hearing to understand it, and with my right hand *Clack!*
I closed my mobile on my left elbow and *Slip!* put it in my pocket.
I took the opportunity to wink at Son, and with a happy look on her face, she shuddered in excitement or fear.
If I had to say it looked more like arousal.
She likes strong men– I guess this acrobatic performance counts as a show of strength.
Does this girl have some weird fetish? But it’s not like I have room to talk…
Glancing around… I saw that another double-decker tram was approaching in the opposite lane.
The operator had already noticed the fight, and was staring wide-eyed. I’m sorry.
Drawing my gun–
「By the way, Son, I don’t think you’ve paid for your ticket. You really should step off. However, since it would be hard to do so here, I’ll get off first… you’ll have to excuse me for not allowing the lady to go first.」
Saying that, I paused for a second, no, I concentrated intently on my aim and… *Bang!*
I shot at the bumper of the oncoming tram.
With a *Fwing!* the bullet ricocheted into the first floor of our tram.
With a *Ching!*, I heard the bullet ricochet again inside the car, then…. *Click!* From memory, I recalled the layout of the operations panel and grazed the brake lever, bringing the tram to a halt.
–Blind L L8
With my increased sense of spatial awareness, I could use a shooting technique to hit something with a ricochet without having to see the target. This is the first time I’ve done so.
「Now for scene 3– let’s move to indoor combat. Please follow me, Miss Heroine.」
Decelerating, from the tram car continued to move forward under inertia–
I leapt onto the roof of the passing tramcar.
The from the tram car, I ducked into a department store through a window.
Seeing me use the passing car as a stepping stone…
「Hee hee! I thought you’d never ask!」
Son flashed a smile and *Whoosh!*
Stepping onto the tramcar, she vaulted across the space.
*******************************************************************************
Backing further into the building, I found that I had entered a third floor department store–
Whoops…!
Well, this was unfortunate, now wasn’t it?
The area forbidden to men, the mythical El Dorado– The women’s lingerie department.
Countless articles with designs more risque than Japanese styles stood out. Underwear in all colours stretched in every direction, making me dizzy.
From the luxurious carpet underfoot and the exquisite feminine design, it must have been a higher class shop.
Reacting to the high school boy that had backed into the shop through the window…
The clerks and the Hong Kong beauties that were shopping there stared at me with wide eyes.
「…Hello. Pardon the intrusion.」
Since I couldn’t communicate with words, for the time being, I flashed them a smile.
The thing I most wanted to say, but couldn’t was:『Leave, it’s dangerous here』–
But a shot toward the window that Son was about to enter conveyed the thought eloquently.
At the *Bang!* of my gun, the universal female scream of *Kyaa!* went up and they all hastily cleared the floor. Even those in the changing rooms ran out while still in their underwear. Please forgive me. After all, every film has at least one risque scene, so I hope that one day you can look back and laugh at this.
Having easily dodged my shot at that range, Son said:
「So you really are a pervert, like the rumours say, huh? Entering the most inappropriate shop possible!」
Son blushed angrily as she said this, perhaps having a complex about such lingerie that with her body she could never use.
「…It’s probably not very convincing, but I have to speak the truth. This was absolutely not my choice!」
Remembering I had said the same thing before, I had to smile bitterly–
Barefoot Son rushed forward, and with gun and fist, I took up a position to meet her for an Aru Kata fight.
As she ran, Son knocked over a coat rack, took the tubular pole, and with a *Whump!* turned toward me back first. She sprung up covering a lot of ground, with knees flexed and vaulted forward.
「–!」
With such speed and agility, even with her bold attack, I still lacked the time to pull the trigger. With a *Whoosh!*, she swung the steel rod and I moved out of the way, falling backward over a full table of underwear.
The moment her feet touched the floor, Son struck, kicking the table up into the air– Son jumped up on top of the table, and using the steel rod like a man-catcher, tried to pin me to the floor.
–Clever. Son is skilled with a staff.
Perhaps that is why the Nyoibou laser and the staff were mistaken for each other far back into history?
Still pinned to the floor– I kicked at the table Son stood on, breaking the legs, taking her balance, and free myself.
Falling from the table, Son rolled a carpet on floor.
「–Ha!」
As she began to stand, Son aimed a blow with the pole toward my head–
At the same time, I pulled with all my strength on the carpet underneath her with a wink. With a *Swish!*
「Kyaa!」
With both feet high in the air, Son fell on her butt dramatically.
With a crash, the pole she held fell impacted the ground next me, narrowly missing.
Ha ha! Until now you’ve been fighting like a demon, but you’re still a small girl. You don’t weigh much after all.
A smile rose to my face, then–
「–?」
I noticed that there was still one woman on the floor that had not sought refuge.
On the other side of the lingerie shop, near the sweets at the tills… A young clerk with braided hair was doing something.
The girl who looked like she could be AMBULANCE’s Tsugumi Soumiya’s older sister then:
「…!…」
From underneath the clear acrylic display case she took out a hidden Liuyedao– What in Japanese would be called a Seiryuutou9…!
But from her expression, it doesn’t look like she plans to use it to defend herself. While trembling, she made eye contact with Son.
–Now I understand.
She must be one of the many members or Rampan scattered throughout downtown Hong Kong.
「Kou-sama! Please use this!」
*Swoosh!*
The woman with the Seiryuutou was not far away, so I reached out– But using the pole, Son reached out and snagged the sword by the red tassel that dangled off of it.
Then Son cast aside the pole with a clatter.
「–Hee Hee! Since you’ve come all the way to China, I thought I’d let you try a bit of everything.」
In an expert display of skill she swung the sword around her, even passing it behind her back.
Hearing a noise, I turned back to look at the girl from earlier…
「–Haa, Haa…!」
In her tight skirt and high heels, she hardly seemed fit to fight in a melee, but despite that she brandished Shanjiegan–also known as nunchucks.
But I can tell she is a complete beginner. Her every move is slow.
「Shaa!」
She tried to imitate Bruce Lee’ famous stance, catching the one end of the nunchucks under her arm, but *Bonk!*
Missing, she hit herself on the back.
「Awaa!」
And collapsed. She tried to do something, but this happened.
In every Hong Kong Kung Fu film, there’s always a Sammo Han Kimpo-esque10 role responsible for the comedy.
Son and I watch silently for a while…
The woman had discarded her nunchucks and was making a staggering escape, leaving her back totally exposed.
…Without having done anything, it seems this member of Rampan was defeated.
「Uh…well… Sorry about that. It seems the Shanjiegan have been cancelled.」
「Well, in that case, can I use them instead?」
「Can you!?」
「At school… in ASSAULT I had a 3 hour course in nunchucks and triple staff. The instructor was from Hong Kong.」
Speaking those glib words, I picked up the nunchucks.
Taking the oak ends in each of my hands, I held them across my body–
But it was just for show.
「Well then. To make up for my colleague’s disgraceful display, I’ll give you that favour, Tohyama.」
Amidst the scattered lingerie, strewn like a field of flowers, Son plopped down on her side like she watching television with the Seiryutou still grasped in one hand.
「Now don’t you run away. I’d be disgraced.」
Son said, looking relaxed.
「Don’t worry. In Japan we have a saying:『It’s a man’s shame to not eat the meal set before him.』It wouldn’t be cool to abandon the woman in front of me.」
Given this chance… *Whoosh!*
Closing the distance…
Taking a page out of Son’s book, I leapt up and struck low.
Nunchucks have more power than their appearance would suggest. With the centrifugal force generated, the end of the rod would move and impact faster than a staff.
「–Hee hee!」
But my attack was met by her blade.
Rotating her whole body like a roulette wheel as she laid on the ground, she calmly deflected my attack and counterattacked, swinging her blade in attempt to sever my ankles.
–But I anticipated the movement.
At a glance, she might seem defenceless, but it was part of a Chinese martial art– Diquan11.
This set of martial arts techniques was developed to attack a standing enemy from a position on the ground and requires many long hours of diligent study. Thank goodness I was aware of it. It truly was no loss to have learned this lesson so well from ASSAULT’s ‘Die die’ group.
It seems Son had mastered this unusual fighting style–
I dodged the lightning kick she unleashed from the ground.
「…!」
Then taking advantage of my inexperience with the nunchucks, *Cling!*
She struck out with her sword at the weapon’s weak point–the chain–destroying it.
Now all I held were two wooden sticks–and having anticipated this situation–with a *Clack!* I caught and trapped her sword between them.
Then I slammed the side of the blade against my knees with all my strength.
*Crack!*
–I snapped it.
In contrast to Japanese swords that are painstakingly forged layer by layer, Chinese blades are mass produced by casting. Beautifully engraved and decorated with a tassel, without being forged they are very brittle.
This was my plan when I picked up the nunchucks–
But having seemingly anticipated things even further Son:
「–Die!」
Grabbing the tip of the sword from out of the air, she immediately hurled it at me like a shuriken.
「–Augh!」
Having little experience dodging object thrown from beneath me, my dodging maneuver was quite exaggerated.
Taking advantage of that opening, Son reached up and grabbed the lapels of my blazer with the toes of both feet, using them as nimbly as if they were hands.
Then with superhuman leg strength–
Pulled herself close and wrapped her legs around me.
「–!」
With a *Thud!* I fell with both my arms wrapped around Son’s back… and Son’s legs still wrapped around my waist.
Locked in unarmed combat, she tried to take a guard position, but… since a girl was doing it… it was a maddeningly embarrassing situation I never would have dreamed of otherwise.
Mounted on top, Son looked very pleased as she squeezed her legs tighter in a very unlady-like manuevre, drawing my head in closer.
「Is this what they call the ‘Daishuki Hold’12?」
「How the heck do you know Japanese words that even I don’t know, Son!?」
Lifting my upper torso away from her, I immediately tried to drive down with a shoulder attack.
「Hee hee!」
Pushing up off the floor with her tail, Son flew up past my waist…
Then she clamped down on my right arm and locked out my elbow.
Sliding her body up in a upside-down cross legged position, she used her thighs and crotch to envelop my head.
It was a Triangle Choke, no– It was too shallow.
The original technique was meant to cut off the carotid artery, but she is gripping my head.
Additionally, in this somewhat embarrassing position, my mouth and nose are blocked by Son’s crotch.
「Tohyama. You are a fairly entertaining man, but no more than ‘fairly’. My Dulou Jian Jian Jao13 is the perfect end for you. I hate weak men. Your insufficient intuition and inability to devise countermeasures disappoints me. How about I finish you? Right here? 」
…!?
*Squeeze!*…! *Squeeze!*…!
No, this is different. It isn’t a Triangle Choke or some other textbook technique. It’s probably some kind of secret Chinese Kempo technique.
Swiftly immobilise your opponent’s arm, cut off their breathing with your crotch– Then finally, crush their head…!
「Die in this lingerie shop, like the Womaniser you are, with your brains scattered beneath a skirt, Tohyama.」
Ordinarily, such a hold wouldn’t be a problem. There are any number of ways to escape.
But that assumes that your opponent is human. Son’s leg strength is superhuman.
I-I can’t escape Son’s thighs!
*Squeeze!* *Squeeze!*… I could hear my cranial plates grating against each other…
「Three, twoooo, one!」
Just as she was about to pour all her strength into her legs:
*Clang!*
–Accompanied by the rattle of chains, the lock on my arm was released.
「–!」
Thanks to that, I was able to extract my head from between her legs.
–That was close! If I had stayed there for one more second, my head would have split like a watermelon.
Looking up, I saw chains with a counterweight on the the end wrapped around Son’s neck–
The chains extended from the third floor shop to the stairs near a flower shop across the street.
Holding the end of the chain attached to the sword steel forged sickle:
「Wh-what kind of… enviable, shameless things are you doing with Kin-chan…!」
It was my ally Shirayuki–or at least I hoped she was my ally–the light having drained from her eyes at the sight of Son and me in such an compromising position.
「Sh-Shirayuki! You saved me! We were fighting, but you might not have seen that before we got into that complicated situation…」
As I stuttered an explanation, from on top of me as she unwound the counter-weighted chain from her arm–
–Son also looked toward Shirayuki.
「Is she your mistress? What a real Japanese beauty!」
In one instant, she said the most dangerous word…! No!!!
「M-m-mistress..!? Is that what you think of meeeeeeeee–!!!」
*Thunk!*
Shirayuki sent the sickle thudding into the floor.
*Rustle!*
She drew out a long, looong ammunition belt from her uniform with a *Ka-Ching!* Then, as if she had given birth to it, a piece of iron appeared in the space between her feet– It unfolded and reshaped itself into an M-60 machine gun!
「!」
Son and I, entangled in a forest of lingerie, scattered!
With strangely coordinated timing, we dodged right and left–
I dove into a nearby pharmacy, and Son sought cover behind the till in the women’s clothing section.
「–Wa~sshoi! Wa~sshoi!」
Leaving aside the fact that she was using a traditional festival chant, with each『Wa~sshoi』, Shirayuki hitched up her sleeves with a 100 bullet ammuntion belt–
*Chung!*
She snapped up the M-60 in a spring-loaded action like a Monster Hunter Gunlance.
With a *Ka-Chunk!*, She loaded the first bullet on the chain into machine gun.
「Diviiiiiiiine Puuuuuuunishmeeeeeeeeent!!!」
–*Tatatatatatatatatatatatatata!*
A storm of 7.62×51mm NATO bullets burst into the shop interior as the Hong Kong action film changed into a Hollywood war film.
It seems that seeing Son and me in such a posture was enough for her to switch over to Kuroyuki.
「Ahahahaha!!! Those kinds of enviable, shameless things! It’s fine, isn’t it fine! Even though you didn’t want to do them with me! Isn’t that right! Isn’t that right, Kin-chan!」
Ripping off the melody from『Doreamon’s Song』and『Hey Moomin!』, Shirayuki swung the M60, laughing as Son dodged here and there.
*Ping!* *Ping!* *Ping!* *Ping!* *Ping!* Five mannequins’ heads in a row were hit one after another and shattered on the floor. The barrage reached a liquor shop and its sake bottles and wine sparyed liquid like blood from a wound. Crap… how many HKD in damages is this going to be?
「Ahaha! Ahahahahahahahaha–!」
Scattering brass shell casings around, Shirayuki laughed loudly amidst the blooming mist of shattering debris.
「–Tee Hee! As I thought, your woman is amazing!」
Son shouted as she trampled the broken mannequins.
Leaping toward the chandelier above the women’s department till, Son knocked it down with clawed hands and kicked it toward Shirayuki– And it shattered with a crash…!
「Sh-Shirayuki..!」
Just as I worried about her being buried under an avalance of bouquets from the flower shop shelves–*Pop!*
An M60 barrel stuck out of the small mountain of flowers.
Then *Tatatatatatatata!* Shirayuki unleashed a barrage even as she lay prone.
You’re a stubborn woman, Shirayuki…!
「What a stubborn woman!」
It seems Son had the same thought I did, to which:
「A woman should be persistent!」
Shirayuki screeched from her fortress of flowers…
*Clang!*… *Click!* *Click!* *Click!*
The firestorm stopped.
Standing up from where I had lain facedown in the pharmacy…*Whoosh!*
Shirayuki had also come to her feet– Emerging from the mountain of flowers with a katana in hand.
「Kin-chan–Son is a monkey–not human! What I do form now on is monkey extermination, not murder. Fufufu–Oh Divine Thunderbolt! Cleanse and Purify!14–Die!」
*Whoosh!* *Whoosh!*
Shirayuki raised Irokaneayame into a hassou stance above the pile of flowers.
Sh-she plans to kill her!
In Kuroyuki-mode, she might actually do it.
Her overwhelming desire was filling the air.
But– I had learned something in my battle with Son.
We should not deal with Son by killing her.
「W-wait, Shirayuki…! Son is–」
Even as I felt it was useless, I tried to persuade her.
「Die! Die! Monkey extermination! Monkey extermination! Exterminate, Hotogi miko!」
She showed me it was as useless as I thought.
Son, for her part–will have surely picked up on her murderous intent and will want to fight her.
Turning toward them in order to find some way of mediating between them…
–Son was frozen in shock.
「Ahh…The girl who wields the Irokane blade…If she has harnessed its power… this must be the Himiko! Ayee!」
Beads of sweat broke out on her forehead as she mumbled these strange words and edged back.
Until now she had been belligerant, but now she harboured doubts about her own fighting ability.
By no means had she lost the will to fight, but her face showed that she was now cautious about a battle with Shirayuki.
…?
As I furrowed my eybrows at this new state of affairs–
*Beeeep!* *Beeep!* *Beep!* *Beep!* *Beep!* *Beeep!*–
*Beeep!* *Beep!* *Beep!* *Beep!*
From down in front of the shop came the intermittent sound of a car horn.
That noise that sounded like someone was playing with the horn– was Morse Code.
Translating it inside my head…『Riko Riko-rin-rin』… it said.
A girl who could further complicate the situation had arrived.
But this could be my chance.
Riko is sounding the horn from the driver’s seat, and it could be an excellent means of escape.
The 30 minutes I had promised Son are almost up, so– we should retreat. For now.
But… Shirayuki will not stop.
「Shirayuki, that’s enough! Retreat! Son might use her Nyoibou…!」
As I ran toward her, I tried once more to persuade her.
「Kin-chan step aside, if you don’t I can’t kill her! I have been prepared to die since the beginning!」
She was in the same state as the time she came to my room to kill Aria, I stepped in front of her and–
–*Clap!*
I clapped my hands in front of her face to disorient her.
Then I scooped her up in my arms.
「–Shirayuki. God would never forgive me if allowed you to die before our love had blossomed.」
Still holding her sword, I quickly used『Kotou』15whispering into her ear…
All at once, Shirayuki was enchanted.
Kuroyuki was changing back to Shirayuki as she looked up to me from my arms.
「Come now, smile. It grieves me to see you trembiling in rage. But the one who can always soothe my grief is you– Shirayuki. So won’t you smile for me?」
If this were a film, the audience would have been put off by that cheesy line, but Shirayuki thinks everything about me is amazing. Her devotion to me is as fanatical as that for a film star whose film she would go see no matter how bad it was. Then…
「–Yes!」
Waaah…! It’s scary just how quickly she completely reversed expression. Now she was smiling brightly at me from inside my arms.
I grown rather skilled at controlling her, despite the fact we have reached the point of a paired comedy act16.
I gave a wry smile, still carrying her in my arms–
And I rushed over to the window where I had heard Riko honking the horn.
「Oi– Tohyama!」
Son shouted at my back.
But the 30 minutes had passed. I’ve spent enough time playing with you. An extension would be expensive, don’t you know?
I wanted to make a cool exit without looking back.
Then–
–During our battle, I’ve come to understand you, Son. Understand what kind of person you are. If only in part.
Hysteria Mode’s original purpose was to leave behind offspring.
But for those offspring to appear, a woman must accept a man unconditionally, with all her heart.
So… while in Hysteria Mode, I am sensitive to girls’ true feelings. I am able to see deep, deep into their true feelings– That is their heart.
Son– You are not yourself.
You are not here right now.
Your true self–is far away from Kou’s body that someone far away is controlling like a puppet.
It wasn’t Koko, Shokatsu, or Patra; it’s someone else. The real person behind Son–the one whose heart I should be accepting–is somewhere else.
I understood that…and I saw what I had to do for her.
It was not to fight her.
–But save her.
Expel Son so that only Kou remains.
Obviously, I’m nothing like a psychiatrist, and I don’t know what exactly should be done. But the two of us were destined to become each other’s enemy and fight. The difficult situation seems impossible to solve.
Even so, rest assured.
I am『The Enabler』, and as my nickname says, I’ve made many impossible things possible.
Now I will take up this challenge in order to save you.
Why would I save my opponent–You might ask? There are three reasons:
1. Because you are a girl–
2. I am a man.
And 3. Saving women is a man’s responsibility. Isn’t it?
[END CHAPTER FIVE]
(END TEXT)
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1. A type of military APC: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alvis_Saracen
2. A Hong Kong Horror Comedy film franchise.
3. This is the same ‘Ran’ as in Rampan.
4. The family name of the Cao clan, the Koko sisters’ famous ancestor.
5. As you may recall, the kanji for ‘Enabler’ means ‘the one who makes the impossible possible’ thus the joke.
6. Zetsurou is written in kanji as ‘Absolute prison’.
7. Detective Conan Reference.
8. The name refere=s to the shape of the trajectory of the bullet, zig-zagging in two ‘L-shaped’ segments as it ricochets.
9. A type of Chinese sword with a heavy tip similar to a saber or cutlass.
10. Semi-famous martial arts film instructor, trainer, and stuntman.
11. Chinese for ‘Ground Fist’. A set of techniques meant for use when the practitioner is lying on the ground. ‘Chitouken’ in Japanese.
12. Seems to be a corruption of: ‘Daisuki’, so it should be meaning something like ‘Lover’s Embrace’.
13. Means ‘Skull Leg Shears’ in Chinese.
14. Rough translation of a Bhuddist mantra invoking some kind of war deity or aspect.
15. ‘Charming Call’ in kanji.
16.m’Manzai’ in the original. A traditional style of stand-up comedy in Japanese culture, which usually involves two performers (manzaishi)—a straight man and a funny man— trading jokes at great speed. Most of the jokes revolve around mutual misunderstandings, double-talk, puns and other verbal gags– Wikipedia
