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Published at 16th of March 2016 03:00:06 PM


Chapter 44

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Everybody, please check the FAQ first before asking me questions. If it’s not on there, please feel free and ask. I only get annoyed at questions when the same one has been asked 10+ times, and by then I’ll have updated the FAQ. Thank you for your consideration, guys!

A Tenugui (手拭い) is a thin Japanese hand towel made of cotton. It is typically about 35 by 90 centimeters in size, plain woven and is almost always dyed with some pattern. It can be used for anything a towel could be used for – as a washcloth, dishcloth, but often as a headband, souvenir, decoration, or for wrapping items such as bottles. Towels made from terry cloth have largely replaced it in household use. However tenugui are still popular as souvenirs, decorations, and as a head covering in kendo, where it functions as a sweatband, as extra padding beneath the headgear (men), and to identify the participants by team color.

Nerima Daikon is one of Japan’s main daikon radish breeds, named such because it was once cultivated in Nerima, Tokyo. Shougoin Daikon(聖護院大根) is one of the traditional daikon radishes of Kyoto.

Daikon-Ashi(lit. daikon legs) is the Japanese equivalent to ‘thunder thighs’, in reference to the shape of daikon radishes.

Aodakefumi is simply a piece of smooth, hard bamboo that is naturally and ideally cut and shaped to provide the bottom of your feet with an amazing massage, simply by gently stepping on it. Believed by some to encourage weight loss.

The cram school I’d been going to had been focused exclusively for primary school, so now that I’m in middle school I needed to find a new one. For my middle school one as well, I picked one that Oniisama used to attend. I’m not with Akizawa-kun and Fukioka-san anymore, but Aoi-chan was with me instead! Aoi-chan had been attending a primary school that was attached to higher-tiered schools. Because of that, even though it was a primary school attached to a bigger school the same way Suiran’s primary school was, the system it used wasn’t an escalator and unless you passed the entrance exams, they would mercilessly expel you. Thanks to that, Aoi-chan had bags under her eyes since New Year’s. Now that she’s made it into the associated middle school without a problem, she’s been chatting with me about Tarow the Taro just like we used to. Apparently there’s this new tenugui merchandise for him. Why a tenugui instead of a handkerchief or hand towel?

I’m still talking to Fukioka-san by email and phone calls. People with a sharp tongue like her are surprisingly rare, so I want us to stay friends. Last time we talked we mentioned going somewhere together. It’s so friends-like! But wouldn’t it be better if she spent time with Akizawa-kun? Or so I thought, but it seems that Akizawa-kun is busy that day. Thought so~

*imouto*

Now that I’m a middle schooler, I’m allowed to walk outside by myself now. Only during the day though. On weekdays I have classes, so I don’t have much free time. But the fact that I have a few hours to wander about during the weekends now makes me pretty happy. Now that I can just go to the convenience store to buy snacks, I don’t need to use cram school as a cover anymore. If I bring a large bag with me to bring home snacks and sweets, I doubt Okaasama will find out. Okaasama thinks beautiful skin is a girl’s life, so she definitely wouldn’t allow me to eat snacks with cheap oils in them. And what’s more, my next goal is eating fast food. I really want some. It’s the embodiment of junk food. Why do chips taste so good. And I definitely want ketchup with it.

Chips. Also known as french fries in certain other places in the Anglosphere.

Suiran has students coming from all over, so even if I head far away from home to buy snacks, there’s still a chance I’ll get spotted. Because of that, I still can’t let my guard down. Also, I want to eat at the food stands in festivals! Because festivals happen at night, it’ll be hard for me to get permission, so at the moment it’s nothing more than a dream. But festival yakisoba is yummy isn’t it~

Yakisoba. Fried buckwheat, flavoured with a sauce that is more or less a mix of oyster sauce and thickened Worcestershire sauce.

Ah-, and I want to eat takoyaki as well.

Takoyaki. Typically batter filled with octopus, tempura scraps, pickled ginger, and green onion, topped with mayonnaise, thickened Worcestershire sauce, seaweed and bonito flakes.

Ikayaki grilled squid would be great too~

Ikayaki. Grilled squid on a stick, topped with soy sauce.

The number of dreams I have keeps increasing…

*imouto*

Even though I thought I’d be released from it after leaving primary, I ended up being nominated as vice rep again. And my partner, the class rep, is Class Rep. He’s in my class again. For some reason it feels like we’re just the ‘class rep’ pair, but huh~ Unlike Class Rep, I’m not even a stereotype class-rep character. Class Rep feels like he was born to be a class rep. Everybody calls him Class Rep like it’s natural. What was his real name, anyway?

*imouto*

In May, we have the customary excursion. And it’s mountain climbing. Ugh. Mountain climbing. I really don’t wanna go. Apparently the idea behind it is to help the Internals and Externals bond through agonising physical activity, but rather than mountain climbing where everybody is too busy going ‘hahh hahh wheeze wheeze’ to even have a decent conversation, wouldn’t it be better to have an outdoors cooking session or a barbeque at a camp site somewhere? At least I think we’d bond a lot better that way. It’s unfortunate, but I can’t understand the appeal behind mountain climbing at all. Apparently Class Rep actually quite likes mountain climbing. When I asked him what was fun about it, he listed the nature, the clean air, and the feeling of accomplishment for reaching the summit, but sorry. I still don’t get it at all. We’re all a bunch of weak-limbed ojousamas who get chauffeured everywhere, so please don’t make us do something as harsh as mountain climbing. Speaking of which, for a while I used to do squats in primary school, but I ended up stopping at some point, didn’t I. I still do my stretches before bed though. You know, lately, I’m getting the feeling that my legs are getting fatter than they used to be. Well, compared to my last life they’re still totally thin though. In my last life, when I stopped growing taller in middle school, I started growing sideways instead, which was horrifying. The ruder boys called me ‘Nerima’. When I went to Kyoto, they called me ‘Shougoin’. I cursed all of them to stop growing. Even though there were plenty of girls with thicker legs than mine! Even though my weight was average! Even though my legs weren’t fat, they were just a little swollen! Why are middle school boys so insensitive. Cause they’re idiots I suppose. It’s definitely because they’re idiots, yep. I also cursed them to be unpopular. This cursed worked quite well, kekeke! I also tried a diet to make my legs skinnier, but they sure didn’t work at all. Tsk. All these unpleasant memories are surfacing. I think I’ll buy an aodakefumi the next time I have a break.

*imouto*

During the mountain climbing, my group fell behind. Class Rep, I’ll leave the rest to you. I’m struggling just taking care of myself here. My lungs are making a weird noise. I’m suffering. I have to keep watching my feet so that I don’t fall, so I can’t look at the scenery at all. Just what the heck is fun about this. Whenever I look behind me, here and there I spot other kids on the verge of death. …Thank goodness, I’m not the only one. When I finally made it up to the mountain somehow, kids who arrived way earlier were already eating their lunches.

Oi! Weren’t we supposed to be deepening our bonds today.

I was so tired that I couldn’t even find the energy to eat. Us weaker kids are all hunched over, exhausted. While I was sitting there, I could hear the girls around Kaburagi and Enjou happily kicking up a fuss. Even though my group hasn’t even opened our lunch boxes yet, those guys are already done eating. There’s this somewhat gyaru-group that’s been forming since we entered middle school that’s for some reason full of athletic girls. I’m jealous. After resting for a while, just as I regained the energy needed to eat, I saw some of the External boys chatting amicably with some Internal girls. Goodness! While we were here dying, some of the Externals and Internals got closer together! Could it be that the mountain climbing worked!? Nothing so wonderful happened for me. Is it because I look weird sporting drill hair with a tracksuit? Oh? Isn’t that Miharu-chan over there? Miharu-chan is the vice class rep for another class. She also fits the image of a class rep to a tee. Anyway, there she was, chatting with an External boy. Ah! She laughed. I wonder if Class Rep felt jealous seeing that. Even at normal times, he’s already so panicked about Enjou being in her class. Before long, he’s going to come for more advice, I bet.

*imouto*

Aahh… When it’s time to leave the mountain, I wonder if it’s possible to have the Kisshouin family send me a helicopter.

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