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Published at 19th of April 2019 12:06:55 PM

Chapter 1

Chapter 1: Loving a Girl like Crazy


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Translator: Flying-Lines

Loving a Girl like Crazy

By Song Xiaojun

 

When having a party with friends, we decided to play a game .

We tried to find a theme and tell one’s own real experience, and see whose experienced was the most bizarre, the most touching, the most unbelievable or made us speechless and wanted to beat him .

Finally we chose a theme—have you ever loved a girl like crazy?

And when this question was cast out, everyone fell into silence, trying to recall those passionate old times when they went after a girl like crazy .

Among the gentlemen present, some had already got married, some had girlfriends, while some were still single as always .

While everyone kept in silence, Sizhang (literally means forty years old in English) lit a cigar and said, “My story is at my mouth . I’ll share mine first . ”

I smiled without saying anything, waiting for his story .

Actually Sizhang hadn’t reached forty yet .

 

When we met in our twenties, we began to call him Sizhang .

At that time we were all in college in Shandong .

Sizhang had a childhood girlfriend called He Yu .

As Sizhang said, he and He Yu grew up together since they wore spit pants, gnawed pig thighbones together, and took a bath together naked . The more magical thing was, their birthdays were two days’ difference, characters complemented and the same blood type, they were totally a perfect match .

Sizhang said, “Before I knew that a boy and a girl could have a baby, I had already wanted to have a baby with He Yu . ”

They played house, and played games of examining each other’s body since they were young . They just called each other’s parents dad and mom .

When Sizhang and He Yu were together, they were still in high school . They went through secondary sex characteristics, growing Adam’s apple, enlargement of breast, wet dream, menophania, and all kinds of agitation of puberty together . While others already had their own puppy love, they were still as naïve as newborn babies .

When in high school, He Yu had an accident and lost too much blood .

Sizhang had a blood transfusion for her without any hesitation .

 

Sizhang said, “Watching my blood flow into He Yu’s body, I felt like we were connected . It felt like I transported my gene into her body . It was kind of like having sex . I felt thrilling and dizzy, and finally had an orgasm . Really, I mean it . ”

Finally, they went to two colleges close to each other in Shandong, about 180 km away .

It was the first time they separated . Sizhang said, “I felt like I had a conjoined twin plastic surgery . He Yu was like my phantom limb . I always thought I could see her whenever I wanted . But when I really turned around, she was already gone . ”

The real accident happened on the eve of Valentine’s Day one year later .

Sizhang received a call from He Yu . On the phone, He Yu said shyly, “Sizhang, Sizhang, a boy confessed his feelings for me . Do you think I should say yes?”

Sizhang was dumbfounded . In his eyes, those words were like, “Honey, honey, a boy wanted to sleep with me . Do you think I should say yes?”

Sizhang lost his mind . He jumped and cried, “Damn it! Fuck! Fuck! Fukc!”


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Sizhang rushed out of his dormitory without putting on a coat . He rode on the bicycle and hit the pedals like crazy .

On the road at night, an idiot only wearing a sweater was riding his bicycle like crazy, rushing to another city 180 km away . But the thing was what he was going to do .

Sizhang said, “I had no idea what I was going to do . Maybe, to kill that son of bitch . ”

Sizhang rode on the bike for a whole night like crazy, with his sweater and underpants all wet . His whole body was steaming, like the steam engine in Watt’s times .

Till the noon of Valentine’s Day, Sizhang finally arrived at He Yu’s dormitory . When he jumped off the bike, he nearly fell onto the ground .

When Sizhang recalled it after so many ears, he said with kind of resent, “I can’t feel my legs . ”

When He Yu came down her dormitory, Sizhang was standing there in a weird toe-out gesture, wearing only a sweater, shivering, like a prisoner who had just had a prison break,

He Yu was so surprised that she nearly lost her breath, “What are you doing here? Where is your coat?”

Before Sizhang said anything, He Yu rushed back to her room . Soon she came down with a woman’s pink knee length down jacket . She helped Sizhang put it on .

Sizhang kept standing there with his toes out, wearing that pink woman’s knee length down jacket . Finally he spitted out some words, “You said yes?”

He Yu was stunned, “What?”

Sizhang said in a sobbing tone, “So you said yes to that man who tried to chase you?”

He Yu felt embarrassed, “I…I haven’t . ”

Sizhang was like crazy, “So you prepare to say yes?”

After a moment’s silence, He Yu felt a little shy, “I don’t know . Hey, let me ask you . When you boys are chasing girls, do you always think of that thing?”

Those words really hurt Sizhang .

After so many years, when Sizhang recollected that moment, he still couldn’t take the pains and bend down, hoping that he could be down enough to lick the road .

At that very night, He Yu took Sizhang to the school cateen to have some dumplings, and then led him to the boys’ dormitory to sleep .

When Sizhang sent He Yu back, that boy who was chasing He Yu was waiting down her dormitory with a bunch of flowers .

When that boy saw Sizhang who was wearing a woman’s pink keen length down jacket beside He Yu, he stepped back with some doubts subconsciously .

Feeling embarrassed, He Yu said to Sizhang, “I’m gonna have some words with him . ”

Sizhang became dumb, watching He Yu run to that boy . He had no idea what they were talking about . How he wished that he could have learnt lip language .

The moment Sizhang couldn’t help rushing to them, He Yu received the flowers from the boy, and even smiled at him shyly .

Sizhang could hear the breaking sound of his heart, not “cracking”, not “clicking”, or “boom”, but He Yu’s laughter .

Sizhang’s dignity as a man finally revived . He turned around and ran away, leaving He Yu shouting behind, “Where are you going?”

On the road at night, a dumbass wearing a woman’s knee length down jacket was like flying on a bike .

Sizhang said, “That kind of pains was like all my internal organs were inside out . Every step I took, it felt like they were rubbing on the rough pitch road . ”

Sizhang couldn’t imagine the girl who he loved and grew up with him would say yes to another man from nowhere in face of him on the night of Valentine’s Day .

Sizhang felt that his whole world collapsed .

We helped Sizhang analyze the reason . Maybe because “there is no scenery in one’s familiar places, and the man a girl is familiar with has no penis . ”

Sizhang cried and said, “Screw you!”


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For the rest time in college, Sizhang hadn’t had a relationship . Instead he became interested in all kinds of club activities . He had participated in all kinds of activities, like college students’ circuit device competition, college students’ ten-day trip in Pinkong Mountain, and college students’ street charity donations, etc . .

After graduation, He Yu received a good offer . She went to Beijing, becoming a Beijing drifter .

Sizhang found a job in a transport company in Shandong . He drove a kind of autotruck . It often took him three to four days for one trip . So he had to eat and sleep on the truck, hang a bed net in the cab in summer and stick warm pastes all over his body in winter, with ten more thermos bottles in the cab . When there was traffic jam, it might last three or four days . Sizhang can only play jokers with other divers .

One day when Sizhang was driving with a whole truck of sex toys, he received a call from He Yu .

He Yu cried on the phone, “Sizhang, Sizhang, I lost my purse, and my ID card . Even the sewer in the apartment I rented got plugged . Now the water is spurting from it . And I can’t reach the landlord . What should I do?”

On hearing that, Sizhang murmured, “Damn i! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!”

He immediately turned his truck around and changed his routine . With a full bladder since in Shandong, he drove to Beijing with a truck load of sex toys crazily, totally leaving behind those shopkeepers of Taobao who were waiting for the consignment .

Sizhang’s truck was not allowed into the neighborhood . So he had to park it on the other side of the road . He jumped off the truck, still with a full bladder, rushed into He Yu’s apartment and knocked the door .

 

When He Yu opened the door and saw travel-strained Sizhang, she was completely dumbfounded .

 

Sizhang sneezed some words from the slit between his teeth, “I wanna pee . ”

Hearing Sizhang’s piss hitting the closestool, He Yu was still badly shaken .

Soon she heard Sizhang panting in the bathroom .

Half an hour later, Sizhang came out, with the bathroom renewed, and the sewer dredged .

Sizhang threw a stack of money and a bank card, then said to He Yu, “You keep it . ”

When He Yun was about to say thank you, Sizhang’s phone rang . The boss of the transport company was shouting on the other side, “where the fuck have you been?”

Now Sizhang became anxious, murmured, “Damn it! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!” Then he rushed out, leaving He Yu behind, saying, “You should eat some food and then go . ”

When Sizhang came out of the neighborhood, he found two policemen were beside his truck, talking about something .

For the tonnage of his truck, the police could not tow it away with their trail car .

Sizhang bit the bullet and ran to the police . He tried to cotton up, saying, “I have my wife and kids to feed . Please show some mercy . ”

Finally Sizhang still had to pay the fine, and then drove on the highway like crazy with a full truck of sex toys .

Bearing all kinds of hard works, and working diligently, finally Sizhang saved enough money and bought a truck of his own . He kept working on long distance delivery, sending all kinds of odd goods .

Sizhang’s favorite movie was The Transporter . He said, “The leading actor is fucking like me . One time when I was driving at midnight, I met a bunch of robbers . They put a tree in the middle of the road . And I knew they were robber . So I hit the accelerator hard and ran over the tree . After I drove for nearly ten kilometers, I found that two tyres had air leakage .

Sizhang got a chance to go to Beijing again . He stayed there for one day .

He Yu invited Sizhang to dinner .

He Yu looked quite weird, hemming and hawing when speaking .

Sizhang was a little impatient, “Just tell me what happened . Are you taking me as an outsider?”

He Yu said, “My boyfriend needs a sum of money for the turnover of his business, otherwise he can’t pull it through this time . ”

Sizhang was stunned, “Since when did you have a boyfriend? Why didn’t I know?”


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He Yu felt a little ashamed, “I didn’t want to tell you because you may feel awful . ”

Sizhang became silenced .

He Yu went on, “He borrowed money from loan shark . ”

Sizhang lit a cigarette, then asked, “How much does he need?”

He Yu plucked up all her courage and said, “A hundred thousand . ”

Sizhang took a few puffs of the cigarette, and then said, “Give me five days . After five days, I will transfer the money to your account . ”

Speaking of which, Sizhang got up and left, leaving He Yu there with her mouth wide open .

After going back to Shandong, Sizhang sold his truck, plus all his saving, he pooled a hundred thousand for He Yu .

We were all very angry, “Are you nuts? Think about it . What if He Yu’s boyfriend is a liar?”

Sizhang laughed indifferently, “I bet that man must be a total liar . However hard it is, a good man shouldn’t ask money from his woman . ”

We were all surprised, “Then why did you lend the money to her?”

Sizhang answered, “Whatever she wanted, I couldn’t say no . Besides, she needed to learn a lesson . She is all good but too naïve . ”

We were surprised again, “She is too naïve? I think you are too stupid . ”

Sizhang responded with a snort, “Still water runs deep . Whether I am smart or stupid differs . ”

After selling his truck, Sizhang went back to the transport company he worked for before .

Still working diligently and bearing all hard tasks .

Two months later, He Yu called Sizhang . She cried and said, “My boyfriend is missing . He didn’t pick up my call . He is a liar . I am sorry . ”

Sizhang said, “It’s only a hundred thousand . No big deal . You learnt a lesson with the money . It’s worth it . ”

He Yu choked with sobs on the phone .

Sizhang’s favorite route was from Shandong to Beijing . He said, “Wherever He Yu is, that place becomes different . Even if she is in Sahara, a fountain would be born there . Even if He Yu is in Somalia, it’d become a heaven on earth . ”

He Yu was missing for some time . She never contacted Sizhang again . Maybe because she thought she was a disaster to Sizhang, so she tried to get away from him .

It was winter again .

Sizhang still preferred long distance as before . This time he drove to Beijing with a whole truck of instant noodles . It was extremely cold . And on the highway was just sprinkled with salt to melt the snow . The snow was almost melted, but the wind was still pretty strong . When Sizhang peed with favorable wind, his urine even reached the billboard a few hundred meters away .

After pass the toll gate, he hit the braking suddenly . He saw a familiar figure standing beside the isolation strip on the endless highway, shivering . It was He Yu!

Sizhang felt like his head was going to explode . With his truck blocking up the entrance of the expressway, he jumped off the truck and ran like mad towards He Yu and held her into his arms .

He Yu was like the ice queen . When Sizhang hugged her, she couldn’t help chilling . Sizheng felt both angry and heartbroken, “What the fuck are you doing here?”

He Yu choked with sobs, “I’ve been waiting for you for three days . I could only sleep in the toll gate . I calculated the wrong time, but I dare not leave . I don’t want to miss you . ”

Sizhang went crazy, “why didn’t you call me?”

He Yu said, “Every time I called, it was all bad things . So this time I want see you in person . ”

Sizhang held He Yu tightly in his arms, until a long line of vehicles was piled along at the entrance of the expressway with thunder-like trumpet .

Sizhang drove the truck along the expressway covered with snow .

Sitting on the frong passenger seat, wrapping in Sizhang’s military coat, He Yu was eating a bowl of hot instant noodles .

After finishing eating the instant noodles, He Yu took out twenty thousand yuan and give it to Sizhang .

Sizhang got very angry, “What are you doing?”

He Yu said, “This is all I have saved for now . I still owe you eighty thousand . I can work for you, do the laundry and cook for you .

Sizhang was stunned, “Are you crazy? This isn’t a women’s job . ”

He Yu was mad at his stupidness, “Why can’t you always get to my point since you were young? The latter half of my words matters . I’ll do the laundry and cook for you!”

Sizhang looked at He Yu, totally dumbfounded .

He Yu’s cheeks became red due to the coldness, with a serious look at Sizhang .

The big truck was still running on the road fast .

This year Sizhang bought a new truck, and named it “He Yu” .

All his peers laughed at him, “You think you are driving a destroyer?”

Sizhang said, “I am driving a destroyer, only belonging to my wife and me, which can repel all bad people and bad things . ”

After Sizhang finished his own story, everyone couldn’t help applauding for him .

Sizhang smirked, “Actually it’s not loving a girl like crazy . It’s a little bit far from crazy . But I think since you love someone, you should at least do something . Anyway, it won’t be bad . ”

Speaking of which, a pregnant girl came before Sizhang .

Sizhang was frightened, “What are you doing here?”

The girl was a little shy, and said in a ridicule tone, “I missed you . ”

We all got stunned .

Sizhang felt a little embarrassed, “Let me introduce you . This is my wife, He Yu . ”

We all stood up, and shouted, “Hello, sister-in-law!”

He Yu got a little surprised, “Hello, hello . Come to my home for some drinks when you have time . ”

Sizhang snickered . He was showing off to all of us .

In life, when you missed something, you might miss it forever .

But sometimes you might meet again because of your courage .

We were all looking forward to a story with a happy ending . But actually only our courage could make the story end up with a happy ending, and make your lover a pillow’s distance away from you, sometimes maybe 20 centimeters negative .

A man should love a girl like crazy .

And a good girl is also worthy to be loved by a man like crazy .

Love is a game for brave ones .

If you are not brave enough, you would be knocked out soon .

If you are brave enough, now turn around and hold your beloved in your arms .



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