No Battle No Life - Volume 1 - Chapter 13

Published at 27th of May 2016 12:19:10 PM

Chapter 13

Volume 1 Chapter 13: How to act like a smart aleck

Before he could finish, Tu’s words were drowned out by Ney’s yell and the 3 bowed simultaneously before excusing themselves .

“Though I’m quite unhappy at being interrupted… Seeing them fired up is good . Time for me to prepare as well . ”

The plan was about to begin and the ‘chisel’ to smash the ‘rock’ has been prepared…

“Grouchy… Grouchy… Grouchy… Come quickly damn it…” After the meeting ended, Tu had been pacing in his room . Every second seemed to make victory one step further .

— Ah how I wish I could hug the goddess of victory right now .

Such insane thoughts kept floating in his mind .

“Your majesty… The 300 sets you wanted… Austrian military uniforms… Have been prepared… In the main hall!” Grouchy huffed and puffed as he pushed the door open– No, slammed it open .

Tu heaved a sigh of relief . This sort of waiting was terrible to bear, and it felt like the sword of Damocles was floating atop his head . But now that Grouchy was here, the sword would be gone…

“Did you get the trading permits which the central feudal lords signed with the southern feudal lords?” Tu hurriedly asked without giving pause to Grouchy .


“Quick, stop drinking water . ” Tu forcefully pulled down Grouchy’s hand which held the water flask and Grouchy could only show his unhappiness on his face .

“Ah… Your majesty, of course I did . When did I ever fail to complete the missions your majesty assigned me?”

“Good, leave the uniforms here . Now pick 300 men from my personal guard and have them gather at the backdoor of the Palais . When you’re done, hand the permits to Lannes and the rest .

“Pick a number of people and take side routes to get to the destination after Lannes sets off and meet up with him . Remember, don’t bother giving the permits yourself . Time is of the essence . ”

“Pick people… Hand over permits… Gather . Yes, your majesty!”

Tu’s string of orders, and his tremendously serious face made Grouchy nervous but he quickly recovered and left after giving a salute .

“His majesty is really impatient huh…” Grouchy muttered as he left .

“Now is time for the act . ” Tu took down the Joysword from the sword rack and walked out of the room, his next destination was–

— The garden, it’s time for my performance .

Today was strange, the guards assigned to herself had increased and they kept a close watch on her, such that her past freedom was completely curtailed .

— It feels like I’m actually in a prison now, though this prison has the luxurious cover of a palace…

Dawn’s mood was terrible today be cause she stepped out of her room only to find dozens of guards waiting for her . They were fully armed and greatly restricted her movements– It was utterly dreadful .

“Looks like something big is happening… Even a prisoner like myself who has nothing has to be kept under such a close watch . ”

Dawn could only lie on the big silk bed and think of what might have happened but couldn’t think of anything and rolled about, making her long golden hair twirl about on the bed .

Just like that, time passed .


*Da* *Da* *Da*…

Sounds like a door opening and hurried footsteps .


These muffled voices seems like that of the king . The doors weren’t shut tight . How careless was he? Dawn really couldn’t understand how such a person could have won .

“Forget it, no point thinking about this . Guards, I’m going to the garden to see the flowers! This is something your king permitted me!”

Dawn’ agitation grew, and for some reason she seemed to be in high spirits at the thought that the she was now a great distance away from the palace in Vienna, and she wished that these days would continue .

But that wouldn’t be likely . France would definitely trade her away .

“Alright, miss . Please come with us . ”

Probably only the flowers understood her .

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As Dawn was admiring the flowers, a rushing figure caught her attention . It was the king again . Ever since she heard the long speech he delivered, her interest in him grew, and she wanted to know more about him .

(TL: This is the only time when talking about politics nets you a girl…)

Dawn couldn’t help but to stare at Tu . This was something unprecedented . Ever since Dawn entered the palace in Vienna, she had never paid attention to a man…

— Her fixation was almost like that of an artist to the model the artist was painting a portrait of .

He looks pretty good in a military uniform and a sabre by his side…

Eh… He’s wearing… Isn’t that the Austrian uniform for generals?

— How did he get Austrian military uniforms?

— What is he going to do?

Dawn’s gaze went from a relaxed one to one filled with panic– And also fear .

She seemed to, no she definitely knew what was up .

— “I will share your burden…”

— “Karl’s letter arrived…”

“Hu…” Dawn now knew what she had to do .

“Gentlemen, I think I’ve had enough . It’s time for us to return . ”

Looks like she had to help Karl, on account of that face that they were comrades, even though she didn’t actually like him very much, and hated flirtatious playboys like him .

— But I’m still a member of the royal army .

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— Even if I’m now in the “enemy”‘s palace .

Tu now headed for the backdoor of the Palais, and wasn’t too pleased with his performance since he was, after all, not a professional actor, and had to put up a show of being frantic that had to also look natural .

— He would rather face the enemy on the battlefield instead of this, And if he overestimated that woman, then this plan would be over .

— I can only hope that woman is as smart as I think she is, and she is as loyal as she seems .

Forget it, no point thinking . He had instructed the personal guard in the Palais to place people all over to keep watch 24/7, especially at night– When the time comes, he will know…

“Soldiers, raise your flags up high and keep them up whilst we march to the north!”

By the north, Tu meant the Barker mountain range that separated France, Austria and Prussia . The mountain range spanned hundreds of miles and restricted passage between Prussia and France . It was covered with a variety of trees and shrubs, making it the perfect training ground for mountain warfare .

— And it was just one day away from Paris, and one day away from Fort Carré .

“Move out!”

At the same time, Lannes and the rest left according to Tu’s instructions, and were all in civilian clothing, with their cannons separated and packed in boxes used for crops . The 10,000 strong were separated into 10 groups which set off at different times from the 7 gates in Paris .

— Their destination was the same . Everything they did was to fool the enemy .

But there was a part of the plan that fooled even them .

“Where did his majesty go? Wasn’t he supposed to be the main force?” Murat began discussing with his personal guard as he didn’t understand what was going on .

“I heard he was going to Barker in the north . Supposedly there’s a special unit there…”

“Forget it . Leave the king’s plans be . Kid, when we begin fighting, you better be more ferocious!”

“Our unit will definitely be the first in our charge, my respected excellency . ”

“Hahaha… I won’t let that fellow Ney steal my glory!”

Quickly, quickly, quickly!

Soon, I will reach . That is the key to my victory . I really can’t wait, haha…

He was now galloping as he led his troops on a fast march toward the Barker mountains and he felt his excitement grow with every step .

Come on, come on, come on, my goddess of victory .

French Army Camp, deep in the Barker Mountains

Ever since Tu took over Paris, he had transferred a small portion of his troops to be put to harsh mountain warfare training in the Barker mountains despite the lack of numbers .

As there were almost no mountains between Austro-Hungary, and France, who was the number one enemy, mountain warfare training was something unnecessary and every general objected to this . Only under Tu’s lone insistence did the plan pass .

— Now was the time to see if my lone insistence has borne fruit .

“Your majesty, why have you come?”

“Oh, Davout, I’m here to give you combat orders . Your time of glory has come . . ”

Davout was originally the commander in charge of defending Paris, and after he received the orders to train the troops, he brought about a 1,000 of the most elite of troops from Tu’s personal guard to this deserted mountains and begin training .

Thus, it can be said that the most elite of the personal guard was not present during the Battle of Aude .

— To think that the Austrians were thrashed without my best, they really have nothing going for them besides numbers,

“I order you now, to pick 300 of your men here who know how to speak German and change into this clothing here now . Arm yourselves appropriately and then follow your king as we set off for Fort Carré . ”

“Now… But, your majesty… Where is the clothing you speak of?”

“On their backs, these are the new trainees I brought . ” Tu said as he pointed at the 300 behind him .

Now, what kind of play would unfold?