Chapter 98 – Sunshine and confession (Translated and edited by Xing)
“What’s this—paroxetine hydrochloride tablets?” Tang Xue read aloud the prescription name on the box. When she turned it over and read the prescription instructions and what it treated, she was stunned.
“Take it that auntie is begging you. Please go take a look at Yu Yan.” Madam Liang was like grasping at straws. “He likes you so much.”
Tang Xue was unable to believe that Yu Yan had depression. In her mind, he was still that pure and innocent teenager. Though he did not like to speak, he was someone who loved smiling. When he smiled, an adorable dimple would appear on his face. On the ice, he was like a beautiful butterfly with unfurled wings, brimming with life and grace.
How could someone like this have depression?
Tang Xue was temporarily unable to accept this news. At the same time, she was a little doubtful as well. Thus, she said, “I can visit him but I’m not a psychologist.”
——
For the competition on Tuesday, Li Yubing and the team were going up against the Snow Eagles, an experienced ice hockey club in Beijing. It was said that there was someone extremely rich backing this club. Though they might not be one of the top clubs in China, they were definitely the richest.
The Snow Eagles had quite the following on their home ground. The night of the competition, the stadium was packed. Whenever the Snow Eagles were falling behind, the local fans would yell Li Yubing’s name.
Don’t be mistaken, they were not Li Yubing’s fans. They merely wished that the “disgrace of the Dauntless Dragons” could go up more and ruin his team’s tempo, allowing them to take back the field.
This was a humiliation.
Tang Xue was beyond upset herself as she sat in the spectators’ stand. She could not imagine how Li Yubing felt.
The competition lasted over two hours and the Dauntless Dragons’ spirit was under constant attack. However, they managed to withstand the pressure and won in the end.
When Li Yubing came back, it was some time past 10 pm. Their hotels were only one street away from each other and he went to Tang Xue’s hotel to find her.
They strolled hand in hand in the streets for a while. Tang Xue originally wanted to tell him about Yu Yan. However, seeing his exhausted expression, she changed her mind and hugged him instead.
Li Yubing still had the energy to joke around. “Are you planning to reward me?”
Thinking back on the humiliation at the ice stadium earlier that night, Tang Xue felt aggrieved on Li Yubing’s behalf. But this was out of her control and she wanted to help him disregard that nonsense. Thus, she leaned into his embrace and rubbed her head against his chest. She said, “Li Yubing, you can do it.”
Li Yubing thought of something and ruffled her hair. He let out a soundless sigh.
When Tang Xue returned to her hotel room that night, she scrolled through her conversation history to find Yu Yan. When she clicked in, she discovered that they last texted during Chinese New Year. The last messages that they sent each other were New Year greetings.
It had been so long and what she knew of him now was all from the news. She wondered how he was doing.
Tang Xue texted him: Are you there?
The chat showed that he was typing. After a long while, he replied with a simple “Mm.”
Tang Xue: I’m in Beijing. Are you free tomorrow? Want to meet?
Yu Yan: Sure.
……
Originally, Li Yubing and Tang Xue had arranged for her to take the same flight back as him and the ice hockey team. However, in the morning, Tang Xue sent him a voice message.
Tang Xue, “Li Yubing, I had something on and went back last night. I didn’t tell you beforehand as I was afraid that you’ll be worried.”
Li Yubing felt that something was amiss. While having breakfast, he was lost in thoughts. When Brother Pang stealthily swiped away the peeled egg he held and swapped it with a ball of napkin, Li Yubing raised the napkin to his mouth without realizing it. Brother Pang was shocked. He quickly stopped him, took away the napkin and returned the egg.
Li Yubing snapped out of his daze and picked up his phone to re-listen to the message.
He realized what was wrong. Tang Xue was upfront in her actions and always told him immediately whenever something happened. The vague excuse of “I had something on” was out of character for her.
Besides, if she returned to Rain City last night, she should already be back when she sent the message to him this morning. Based on how people usually talked, she should have said “came back” instead of “went back”.
Li Yubing narrowed his eyes and thought for a moment. In the end, he still decided to call her directly. “Hey, where are you?”
Tang Xue paused for a moment. Then, she replied, “Where else can I be? In school, of course.”
When she spoke, there was a howling sound in the background that should be the wind. When Li Yubing heard the wind, he gave a slight frown.
Beijing was experiencing such large gales these few days.
Li Yubing said, “Mm, have a good lesson. I heard Jiang Shijia said that it’s going to rain. Did you bring your umbrella?”
“Yes, yes, I did. Li Yubing, do you think I’m stupid? I’m heading to class now, gonna hang up.”
“Okay.”
After Li Yubing hung up, he checked the weather report in Rain City; it stated clear skies with no wind.
He felt his heart sank slowly. A little unable to accept this fact, he texted Jiang Shijia and asked: Is it going to rain in Rain City today?
Jiang Shijia: Nope, the sun’s out.
Li Yubing: Mm.
——
Tang Xue and Yu Yan arranged to meet at a café near the national team that he was at. His appearance did not seem to have changed much in the past year. Even his hair was the same. His dimple was still there and when he smiled, his eyes remained bright and limpid. The only difference was the steadiness in his gaze that indicated the growth he experienced in the past year.
Tang Xue suddenly felt the melancholy of an aged mother. “Yu Yan has grown up.”
Yu Yan looked down and smiled. He asked, “What are you doing in Beijing?”
“I’m here to watch a competition.”
Yu Yan did not probe whose competition it was. He merely said, “Li Yubing and you, are both of you doing well?”
“Pretty good. Do you have a girlfriend?”
Yu Yan shook his head. He lowered his eyes and did not dare to meet her gaze. He was afraid that she would see how upset he was. The person he liked was asking him nonchalantly if he had a girlfriend.
After a while, Yu Yan exhaled slowly and asked her, “Does Li Yubing know that you came to find me?”
“He’s been feeling down lately. I’ll tell him after I go back.” Tang Xue held her chin and measured Yu Yan. His cheeks were rosy and his complexion was excellent. Overall, he appeared well and looked to be in good spirits. Initially, Tang Xue was already skeptical that Yu Yan was sick. Now that she saw him in person, she was even more unconvinced. She watched him like this for some time before grinning suddenly.
Yu Yan’s face reddened uncontrollably. He mumbled, “What is it?”
“Yu Yan, after a year of not seeing you, you’ve evolved. You’re even able to trick others into thinking that you have depression.”
Yu Yan was surprised. “Did my mother go find you?”
“Mm, you’re her flesh and blood after all. No matter how fierce she normally is, she would still be worried when it comes to you.”
“Say, do you think I’m going overboard by doing this?” Yu Yan started to feel a little guilty.
Tang Xue thought for a while and waved her hand. “If it was someone else, it’s definitely overboard. But based on my interaction with your mother, I can understand your actions. You’re trying to make a breakthrough with unconventional moves and fight fire with fire. Relax, don’t feel pressured by your conscience. If you don’t fix this now, you might really end up having depression.”
Yu Yan shook his head. “I won’t ever have depression.”
“Oh? How are you so sure?”
He watched her eyes and suddenly smiled. The smile was clean and gentle, and momentarily reminded Tang Xue of when she first saw him.
“Because there’s a ray of sunshine in my heart,” he said
……
After that, Tang Xue and Yu Yan started to catch up on their lives and each shared their recent developments. Yu Yan wished that time could pass slower—so much slower to the point that it could ideally pause at this period, an autumn morning spent in a quiet café where through the crystal clear glass was azure-blue skies and golden-bright ginkgo trees.
With her here, even autumn became lovelier.
However, she ultimately still must go.
Yu Yan said, “I’ll send you to the train station”
“It’s okay, you should head back for training.”
Yu Yan insisted on sending her off. Tang Xue was unable to stop him and went along with it. This chapter is a labour of love that should not be found outside of teafragrance[dot]wordpress[dot]com.
They took a taxi back to Tang Xue’s hotel. When they stepped into the lobby, Tang Xue wanted to tell Yu Yan to wait for her in the lobby while she retrieved her luggage. But when she turned her head, she immediately spotted someone sitting on the lobby sofa.
That person wore a baseball cap and a face mask. His head was slightly lowered and she could not see his face.
However, there was no need. Even without seeing his face, she could identify him as long as he was there.
Tang Xue froze where she stood and mumbled, “Li Yubing?”
Yu Yan wondered, “Hasn’t he already left?”
The person on the sofa stood up. He removed his mask slowly and looked at them with an expressionless face.
Tang Xue’s gaze met Li Yubing’s dark and intense pupils. Her heart leapt and she felt that he might have mistaken something. She was about to speak when Li Yubing opened his mouth.
“You can just tell me if you no longer love me.”
When he said this, Li Yubing felt the sensation of a knife slicing through his heart. There was nothing wrong with this description—it really felt like there was a knife slicing away his heart, again and again, focusing on the most tender and delicate areas.
His heart ached too badly. He did not wish to see them and did not know where he should go. He only wanted to leave and be far away from this place.
He thought he was determined to leave but this determination did not last more than three steps. After three steps, when she was no longer in sight, he began to panic.
He might lose her.
This realization made him feel an acute ache. He wanted to turn back but was unable to do so. However, to take another step seemed more painful than death.
Please…
There was a voice in the depth of his heart, crying for help desperately.
Please…
Then, he was suddenly hugged from behind. The teenage girl’s arms embraced him tightly as she pressed her cheek against his back.
“Li Yubing, I love you.”
In one second, just like this, he soared from hell to heaven.
Chapter 98 – Sunshine and confession (Translated and edited by Xing)
“What’s this—paroxetine hydrochloride tablets?” Tang Xue read aloud the prescription name on the box. When she turned it over and read the prescription instructions and what it treated, she was stunned.
“Take it that auntie is begging you. Please go take a look at Yu Yan.” Madam Liang was like grasping at straws. “He likes you so much.”
Tang Xue was unable to believe that Yu Yan had depression. In her mind, he was still that pure and innocent teenager. Though he did not like to speak, he was someone who loved smiling. When he smiled, an adorable dimple would appear on his face. On the ice, he was like a beautiful butterfly with unfurled wings, brimming with life and grace.
How could someone like this have depression?
Tang Xue was temporarily unable to accept this news. At the same time, she was a little doubtful as well. Thus, she said, “I can visit him but I’m not a psychologist.”
——
For the competition on Tuesday, Li Yubing and the team were going up against the Snow Eagles, an experienced ice hockey club in Beijing. It was said that there was someone extremely rich backing this club. Though they might not be one of the top clubs in China, they were definitely the richest.
The Snow Eagles had quite the following on their home ground. The night of the competition, the stadium was packed. Whenever the Snow Eagles were falling behind, the local fans would yell Li Yubing’s name.
Don’t be mistaken, they were not Li Yubing’s fans. They merely wished that the “disgrace of the Dauntless Dragons” could go up more and ruin his team’s tempo, allowing them to take back the field.
This was a humiliation.
Tang Xue was beyond upset herself as she sat in the spectators’ stand. She could not imagine how Li Yubing felt.
The competition lasted over two hours and the Dauntless Dragons’ spirit was under constant attack. However, they managed to withstand the pressure and won in the end.
When Li Yubing came back, it was some time past 10 pm. Their hotels were only one street away from each other and he went to Tang Xue’s hotel to find her.
They strolled hand in hand in the streets for a while. Tang Xue originally wanted to tell him about Yu Yan. However, seeing his exhausted expression, she changed her mind and hugged him instead.
Li Yubing still had the energy to joke around. “Are you planning to reward me?”
Thinking back on the humiliation at the ice stadium earlier that night, Tang Xue felt aggrieved on Li Yubing’s behalf. But this was out of her control and she wanted to help him disregard that nonsense. Thus, she leaned into his embrace and rubbed her head against his chest. She said, “Li Yubing, you can do it.”
Li Yubing thought of something and ruffled her hair. He let out a soundless sigh.
When Tang Xue returned to her hotel room that night, she scrolled through her conversation history to find Yu Yan. When she clicked in, she discovered that they last texted during Chinese New Year. The last messages that they sent each other were New Year greetings.
It had been so long and what she knew of him now was all from the news. She wondered how he was doing.
Tang Xue texted him: Are you there?
The chat showed that he was typing. After a long while, he replied with a simple “Mm.”
Tang Xue: I’m in Beijing. Are you free tomorrow? Want to meet?
Yu Yan: Sure.
……
Originally, Li Yubing and Tang Xue had arranged for her to take the same flight back as him and the ice hockey team. However, in the morning, Tang Xue sent him a voice message.
Tang Xue, “Li Yubing, I had something on and went back last night. I didn’t tell you beforehand as I was afraid that you’ll be worried.”
Li Yubing felt that something was amiss. While having breakfast, he was lost in thoughts. When Brother Pang stealthily swiped away the peeled egg he held and swapped it with a ball of napkin, Li Yubing raised the napkin to his mouth without realizing it. Brother Pang was shocked. He quickly stopped him, took away the napkin and returned the egg.
Li Yubing snapped out of his daze and picked up his phone to re-listen to the message.
He realized what was wrong. Tang Xue was upfront in her actions and always told him immediately whenever something happened. The vague excuse of “I had something on” was out of character for her.
Besides, if she returned to Rain City last night, she should already be back when she sent the message to him this morning. Based on how people usually talked, she should have said “came back” instead of “went back”.
Li Yubing narrowed his eyes and thought for a moment. In the end, he still decided to call her directly. “Hey, where are you?”
Tang Xue paused for a moment. Then, she replied, “Where else can I be? In school, of course.”
When she spoke, there was a howling sound in the background that should be the wind. When Li Yubing heard the wind, he gave a slight frown.
Beijing was experiencing such large gales these few days.
Li Yubing said, “Mm, have a good lesson. I heard Jiang Shijia said that it’s going to rain. Did you bring your umbrella?”
“Yes, yes, I did. Li Yubing, do you think I’m stupid? I’m heading to class now, gonna hang up.”
“Okay.”
After Li Yubing hung up, he checked the weather report in Rain City; it stated clear skies with no wind.
He felt his heart sank slowly. A little unable to accept this fact, he texted Jiang Shijia and asked: Is it going to rain in Rain City today?
Jiang Shijia: Nope, the sun’s out.
Li Yubing: Mm.
——
Tang Xue and Yu Yan arranged to meet at a café near the national team that he was at. His appearance did not seem to have changed much in the past year. Even his hair was the same. His dimple was still there and when he smiled, his eyes remained bright and limpid. The only difference was the steadiness in his gaze that indicated the growth he experienced in the past year.
Tang Xue suddenly felt the melancholy of an aged mother. “Yu Yan has grown up.”
Yu Yan looked down and smiled. He asked, “What are you doing in Beijing?”
“I’m here to watch a competition.”
Yu Yan did not probe whose competition it was. He merely said, “Li Yubing and you, are both of you doing well?”
“Pretty good. Do you have a girlfriend?”
Yu Yan shook his head. He lowered his eyes and did not dare to meet her gaze. He was afraid that she would see how upset he was. The person he liked was asking him nonchalantly if he had a girlfriend.
After a while, Yu Yan exhaled slowly and asked her, “Does Li Yubing know that you came to find me?”
“He’s been feeling down lately. I’ll tell him after I go back.” Tang Xue held her chin and measured Yu Yan. His cheeks were rosy and his complexion was excellent. Overall, he appeared well and looked to be in good spirits. Initially, Tang Xue was already skeptical that Yu Yan was sick. Now that she saw him in person, she was even more unconvinced. She watched him like this for some time before grinning suddenly.
Yu Yan’s face reddened uncontrollably. He mumbled, “What is it?”
“Yu Yan, after a year of not seeing you, you’ve evolved. You’re even able to trick others into thinking that you have depression.”
Yu Yan was surprised. “Did my mother go find you?”
“Mm, you’re her flesh and blood after all. No matter how fierce she normally is, she would still be worried when it comes to you.”
“Say, do you think I’m going overboard by doing this?” Yu Yan started to feel a little guilty.
Tang Xue thought for a while and waved her hand. “If it was someone else, it’s definitely overboard. But based on my interaction with your mother, I can understand your actions. You’re trying to make a breakthrough with unconventional moves and fight fire with fire. Relax, don’t feel pressured by your conscience. If you don’t fix this now, you might really end up having depression.”
Yu Yan shook his head. “I won’t ever have depression.”
“Oh? How are you so sure?”
He watched her eyes and suddenly smiled. The smile was clean and gentle, and momentarily reminded Tang Xue of when she first saw him.
“Because there’s a ray of sunshine in my heart,” he said
……
After that, Tang Xue and Yu Yan started to catch up on their lives and each shared their recent developments. Yu Yan wished that time could pass slower—so much slower to the point that it could ideally pause at this period, an autumn morning spent in a quiet café where through the crystal clear glass was azure-blue skies and golden-bright ginkgo trees.
With her here, even autumn became lovelier.
However, she ultimately still must go.
Yu Yan said, “I’ll send you to the train station”
“It’s okay, you should head back for training.”
Yu Yan insisted on sending her off. Tang Xue was unable to stop him and went along with it. This chapter is a labour of love that should not be found outside of teafragrance[dot]wordpress[dot]com.
They took a taxi back to Tang Xue’s hotel. When they stepped into the lobby, Tang Xue wanted to tell Yu Yan to wait for her in the lobby while she retrieved her luggage. But when she turned her head, she immediately spotted someone sitting on the lobby sofa.
That person wore a baseball cap and a face mask. His head was slightly lowered and she could not see his face.
However, there was no need. Even without seeing his face, she could identify him as long as he was there.
Tang Xue froze where she stood and mumbled, “Li Yubing?”
Yu Yan wondered, “Hasn’t he already left?”
The person on the sofa stood up. He removed his mask slowly and looked at them with an expressionless face.
Tang Xue’s gaze met Li Yubing’s dark and intense pupils. Her heart leapt and she felt that he might have mistaken something. She was about to speak when Li Yubing opened his mouth.
“You can just tell me if you no longer love me.”
When he said this, Li Yubing felt the sensation of a knife slicing through his heart. There was nothing wrong with this description—it really felt like there was a knife slicing away his heart, again and again, focusing on the most tender and delicate areas.
His heart ached too badly. He did not wish to see them and did not know where he should go. He only wanted to leave and be far away from this place.
He thought he was determined to leave but this determination did not last more than three steps. After three steps, when she was no longer in sight, he began to panic.
He might lose her.
This realization made him feel an acute ache. He wanted to turn back but was unable to do so. However, to take another step seemed more painful than death.
Please…
There was a voice in the depth of his heart, crying for help desperately.
Please…
Then, he was suddenly hugged from behind. The teenage girl’s arms embraced him tightly as she pressed her cheek against his back.
“Li Yubing, I love you.”
In one second, just like this, he soared from hell to heaven.
