VOLUME 1
[1st Discussion ~ The Chatty Student Council]
“There is nothing boring in the world. It is you who have become boring!”
As usual, the president stuck out her small chest and proudly spoke as if she were reciting something she probably read in some book.
However this occasion left me with a deep impression. I see, that’s it.
As I gained more experience, I became a boring person who had trouble finding anything fun.
In this world, nothing is more fun than “firsts.”
First love.
First true friend.
First time getting in trouble.
First success.
First…… eroge?
Well even so, whenever I think about fun things, I return to those thoughts.
“Those were fun times.”
When I entered nursery school, it didn’t matter that I was physically the same as everyone else.
When I was in primary school, I was so happy to carry my little backpack.
When I advanced to middle school, I felt like an adult when I showed my bus pass.
When I was accepted into high school, I remember enjoying myself scoring higher than the others and seizing victory.
Well, that sort of meaning, or so I’d like to say……
“So, are you saying virgins aren’t that bad?”
“Puh-!”
My question caused the president to choke, making her spit out her tea at full force and cough violently. As usual, she was extremely susceptible to my ad-lib. Because it was just us two today, I could tease her a lot.
The president was teary-eyed. She wiped the table in front of her with tissues and glared at me.
“How did you arrive at that conclusion from what I just said?”
“How naïve Prez. My train of thought leads directly to that!”
“What pride! Be more aware of your position as vice president, Sugisaki……”
“I am aware. I am perfectly aware that this student council is my harem –”
“Excuse me. Enough with your awareness of being vice president, but why don’t you start by discarding that other self-awareness.”
The president was sincere in her retorts toward me today, as well. Like I thought, the president is cute.
She was small and short compared to me. In addition, she tried to compensate for her childish appearance by standing on her toes and running around desperately trying to deal with being student council president, both of which made her even more moe.
Yes, moe. The number of girls that can be described with that word are few. That cuteness was already recognized by all the students in the school. She was too cute. Once they saw the president in person, they no longer could feel attracted to moe anime or manga characters.
“Prezzz.”
“What is it?”
The president rolled up the tissues that she used to wipe the tea, and aimed, trying to shoot them into the trash bin in the corner of the student council room. She was too cute, seriously aiming with one eye closed.
I sat my elbow on the desk, and decided to inform this president.
“I like you. Please go out with me.”
“Nyawa!”
The bundle of tissues flew spectacularly in the opposite direction.
The president glared at me once again, teary-eyed.
“Sugisaki, how can you just superficially confess like that?”
“Because I’m serious.”
“That’s a lie!”
“Prez, ‘Hi**rashi’ material is really old” (1)
Even though her teary eyes trembled, she said it without a hint of tragedy.
“Sugisaki, don’t you dare say you’ve forgotten what you said when you first showed up in this student council!”
“What was it? Umm…… ‘Don’t bother, go on without me!’ was it?”
“What kind of situation did the student council start out in?! That wasn’t it!”
“Huh? Then… ‘I have no interest in ordinary humans. Aliens, Time travelers –’” (2)
“That’s dangerous, Sugisaki! In many ways!”
“It’s fine. I prefer the original work.”
“What kind of reassurance is that?! Also, the anime was godly!”
The president seems to have also seen it…… No, isn’t it bad if we delve deeper into this topic? Have I labeled her wrongly? Let’s quickly remember that time.
…… Right, right. I am certain, that at that time, when the members of the student council gathered…… I faced four beautiful girls, and made an announcement.
“I love you all. I love you all very much. All of you, go out with me. Because I will absolutely make you happy.”
“That’s right! From that time, you were well known to this student council for your irresponsibility! Who in the world are you saying would be swayed by a person who says, ‘I don’t care who, just go out with me?!’”
“How rude. I do care who. As they say in S**aker Bunko, ‘I have no interests except for beautiful girls.’” (3)
“So you’re saying anyone is fine as long as they’re cute right?! If you’re going with that, why don’t you at least go compare with something like Fujimi Fantasia Bunko!” (4)
“I am wholehearted! For beautiful girls!”
“Such a broad criteria!”
“Beautiful girls are a rare species.”
“That’s not the issue! It isn’t sincere when you confess to several people at once!”
“Eeh? Isn’t that better than an indecisive protagonist? Starting with a bang from ‘I’ll aim for the harem route!’ would be a manly declaration, right?”
“Unfortunately your specs are different from a popular galge protagonist!”
“Then what kind of protagonist would you say I am?! Even though I like girls this much!”
“Basically, you aren’t a protagonist, you’re a villain! You’re on the side that gets weeded out! Either that or the unimportant best friend of the protagonist! You’re necessary to give a good reaction to gags!”
The president was very well-informed on the subject.
“But my face is nice-”
“That’s just because the artist is good!”
So says the beautiful girl-character president…… was what I thought, but well, whatever.
While I was speaking, I went and picked up the president’s missed tissue, shooting it a short distance into the trash bin.
“…………”
The president gave me a complex look as she sat down. I returned to my own seat and tilted my head.
“What’s wrong, Prez?”
“…… Sugisaki, you sometimes say that your nature is effective, affectionate…… unconsciously.”
“Yeah. That sort of gap lets my affection level increase at a high rate right?”
“That’s your aim!? Damn it! How much has my affection level already increased by?!
“Fufufu…… Well, that was an exaggeration, but more or less it’s definitely what my aim is. But it’s an old habit because I’m popular with women. Now it’s mostly unconscious.”
“Hmm…… This ero power isn’t common.”
“Yes, it isn’t common, this power of mine. When I arrive at the end of the harem route, I’ll need a lot of stamina after all.”
“Ahhh, don’t tell me why you need stamina! “
In accordance with the President’s loli appearance, she couldn’t handle this sort of story. She blocked her ears…… So cute.
However……
“Prez. That reaction is proof that you already know what I was about to say.”
“………………hau.”
She turned red. She fidgeted…… How cute. She really is cute, the president. Ahhh, now I remember that the president was such a huge part of making me want to join…
And as I continued to tease the president for that reason, it really is a shame that as if to interrupt our time, someone opened the student council room door.
“Key-kun. It’s bad to tease Aka-chan too much.”
The one who just spoke was Chizuru-san, the female secretary and a third-year like the president, who just entered the room.
By the way, ‘Key-kun’ refers to me. My name is written with the kanji for ‘key’ and pronounced as ‘Ken,’ therefore, Key-kun.
Also, ‘Aka-chan’ refers to the president. This is also because the president’s name is ‘Kurimu,’ and kurimuzon = crimson, so Aka-chan. (5) Both are very simple nicknames, but ones which pleased Chizuru-san. The president herself would cry out “I’m not a baby!” (6) and get angry, but when she told us with her loli face, Chizuru-san and I couldn’t help but just think “it fits her exactly.”
It’s just, fundamentally, she’s the type of person who refers to classmates by last names and underclassmen by first names. (7) To that end, I am honored for her to call me by a nickname, but according to Chizuru-san, “It’s not like it means I like you more or something.” …… Girls are mysteries.
Now then, Chizuru-san was the opposite type of person from the president. She was tall, with a body that was filled out and slender in the right places. She had natural long black hair that was fluid and silky, with an entrancing adult charm. She also had a cool personality, but was kind at the same time……
In a different sense than the president, it could be said that she is an ideal girl. No, rather than an ideal girl, one might say she’s a beautiful woman.
Watching as she sat down across from me, I rebutted.
“I’m not teasing her or anything. I’m only embarrassing her.”
“In a way, isn’t that also a pretty terrible thing to do?”
“It’s alright. We’ve agreed on it.”
As I explained myself, the president shouted “That’s a lie!” again, which I ignored.
In that pause, the president sulked, so I spoke to Chizuru-san.
“However, it seems like my harem is having trouble gathering today.”
“It’s the student council, not your harem. But isn’t this alright? It’s not like we’re having an event or planning anything. Lately, at these meetings, all we do is eat snacks and chat.
As she said this, Chizuru-san quickly pulled out a bottle of mineral water from her bag and drank from it.
“You just don’t get it, Chizuru-san. If we don’t meet, my affection level won’t increase. Look, in galge, don’t you choose heroines based on different places?”
“That’s still pretty troubling, even if you say that as if it’s the most obvious fact in the world.”
“Basically, if they don’t come to the student council room, I can’t raise their affection, so even if there isn’t an event, they should come here-”
“Rather, that’s why they aren’t coming.”
I was hit with a swift and harsh retort. Chizuru-san…… she wasn’t a straightforward tsun like the president, but occasionally was a bit cruel. The psychological damage she could do was pretty high.
I cleared my throat with a cough and tried to think positively.
“But, Chizuru-san, you came to nurture your love for me, right?!”
“……………… Ah, yeah, sure.”
It was worse than getting rejected. Such incredible inattentiveness. She had pulled out a snack from her bag and started her homework while crunching away.
“Ku…… But when this type of cool character falls in love, they will definitely, without a doubt be passionate about it!”
“Ah, that’s true. I will be passionate. In primary school I sent three hundred letters everyday to my first love saying only ‘I like you.’ In the end, his mind broke, because he was unexpectedly fragile. Since then I’ve lost interest in love…… I wonder if you’re the same.”
She watched me with narrowed eyes, and a thin smile appeared on her lips.
It was significantly more scary than the president’s “Hi**rashi” joke.
It can’t be helped……
“I understand.”
“Eh, after hearing that story, are you prepared? You’ll accept all of me? You’re getting lots of points for that, Key-kun. I’m sure that my flag is somewhat –”
“I’m only looking for a physical relationship with you, Chizuru-san! We don’t need love!”
“……………… So, the next homework problem,”
I was splendidly ignored. Oh well. But…… “Only looking for a physical relationship.” In the worst case scenario, wouldn’t that be even harder than getting a girlfriend? …… Mu.
While thinking that, I suddenly noticed that the president had reached out and took one of Chizuru-san’s snacks. Right before she ate it, I warned her.
“You’ll get fat.”
“Uguu……I- it’s fine. The nutrition will go to my height and chest!”
“Yes, but the risk of it going to your stomach is also pretty high.”
“I-it’s fine! Because it’s hard for me to get fat!”
“It’s also hard for your height and chest to grow.”
“…… Hyah! Chomp!”
Ah, she ate it.
“The next answer to the next question is…… alright ‘metabolic syndrome.’”
“…………”
Chizuru-san said something cruel while looking at her notebook. Did she really have a question like that?
But from eating just one piece, the president’s excitement lessened…… But in the end, despite the worry, she still continued to eat.
I placed my hand on the president’s softly trembling shoulder.
“It’s okay, Prez. If no one will accept you……”
“Eh? You don’t mean…… even if I get fat, you would still like me? Even if I’m not a beautiful girl anymore? Sugisaki…… you……”
Tears welled up in the president’s eyes. I smiled at her.
“If no one will accept you…… please dedicate yourself to your job.”
“Realistic advice?!”
“I’ll support you from the shadows!”
“Why from the shadows?! Basically, you’ll abandon me! I have no value if I’m fat!”
“Well, that’s why I’m encouraging you to work hard not to become fat.”
“Auu.”
The president’s shoulders dropped. In reality if it were her, becoming a little pudgy was cute in its own right…… but even then, as a member of my harem, it would be an issue if she got careless with herself. For example, you can’t survive if you stop paying attention to your feminine side after you become a mother!
“Work hard to stay in my harem!”
“Ah, somehow I suddenly feel like it’s ok to be fat.”
“…………”
Why does it seem like everyone is so tsun? If I couldn’t get even one of them to be dere to me soon, I would die of loneliness. There is nothing as miserable as a galge protagonist who wasn’t popular with girls. Furthermore, a more miserable life would be one where you have a lot of chances, but you end up in the “best friends” ending.
–
Chizuru-san started taking out things to genuinely work on her homework, and the president seriously started eating snacks as if in a trance.
Unbelievably bored, I was thinking of another topic to talk about, when the door rattled open and two girls entered.
“Ahh, sorry for being laaaate~~!”
“E-excuse us.”
Two people with contrasting personalities entered.
The energetic girl walking in front was Shiina Minatsu, a vice president like me, as well as my classmate.
Her long hair was tied in twintails, and because she was in “this student council” it was a given that she was a beautiful girl.
She hadn’t joined any specific clubs, but had good reflexes and was boyish…… actually, her way of speaking was also masculine. Because she was refreshing and cheerful, she was not only popular with guys but also had high popularity with girls. Furthermore, she had a rare yuri feeling about her, so her popularity skyrocketed because of that.
It’s just…… from that, she seemed to hate men like me, helped by the fact that we were both vice president in the same class, and tended to be hostile to me. A textbook tsundere…… but the problem was she wasn’t dere.
And in the background, the girl who’s bowing her head behind us, and who looked away the minute I made eye contact with her was Shiina Mafuyu. She was Minatsu’s younger sister and a first year. She was the treasurer, but well, in this student council there wasn’t much of a distinction between one position and another.
It almost was as if all her energy had been sucked out by her older sister before she had been born. She was also bad with guys, and that did endear her to some of the boys in the school. Well…… the cause of her hate of guys definitely comes from her sister (I believe her sister’s yuri preference convinced her that men were something to be feared).
She had white skin and was easy to recognize from the charming little ribbon she wore in her straight, light-colored hair. She also refers to herself as “Mafuyu” which is also very fitting. Due to that childishness and cuteness, everyone adds “-chan” to her name. For some reason, adding “-san” or not using an honorific didn’t seem right. Only her sister Minatsu called her “Mafuyu,” which strangely fit.
When the Shiina sisters took their places, I spoke to them.
“Oh yeah, Minatsu and Mafuyu-chan, did you have a ‘something that started out very fun’?”
I decided to return to the original topic.
“What is this, out of nowhere?”
Minatsu, who was sitting next to me looked at me with suspicion.
“Well, the president finally said something interesting: the world doesn’t become boring, but you yourself become boring. So something good that happened a long time ago.”
“What do you mean ‘finally’?!”
The president made a fuss again, but she was ignored. The Shiina sisters thought seriously.
Mafuyu-chan, who was sitting diagonally from me, was the first to answer.
“Fo-for Mafuyu, it was……cosmetics?”
“Make-up?”
“Yes. When Mafuyu was little, Mafuyu watched mother use it and couldn’t help but want to do the same. So then in middle school, Mafuyu bought her first cosmetics and was unbearably happy…… But now that Mafuyu thinks about it, Mafuyu doesn’t really like to dress up. Like recently, Mafuyu only wants to do the bare minimum.”
“Ah, I see. That’s so like Mafuyu-chan. It’s alright Mafuyu-chan! You’re already cute enough without make-up! Make-up hides your natural beauty, so it’s better to not use it!”
“Th-thank you……”
“Hey, Ken! Don’t hit on my sister in front of me!”
At my words, Mafuyu-chan’s cheeks flushed and she shyly shrunk back, while Minatsu lashed out. The same as ever. I sighed and put a hand on Minatsu’s shoulder.
“Now now. Don’t be jealous, Minatsu…… You’re pretty charming yourself!”
“No no, I’m not jealous!”
“After all Minatsu, if we were to get married, Mafuyu-chan would become my sister-in-law which is also a charming –”
“That’s not even my own charm!”
Minatsu was really angry…… such a cute girl. She doesn’t need to be so jealous……
“I said I’m not burning with jealousy!”
“Oh! You can even tell what I’m thinking! I can see the finish line!”
“Geez, you’re scaring me! Somehow you’re just scary! Your crazy delusions are too scary!”
“Delusions?… Well, alright, if you want, I’ll pretend they’re delusions. You’re so shy♪♪”
“I-I want to kill him……”
Minatsu shook at my words while Mafuyu-chan desperately tried to calm her down.
Well, it seemed that the student council members have all gathered today.
I saw myself surrounded by four beautiful girls, and I rejoiced to myself.
“Yes, harem banzai. I always love seeing this sight. I’m really glad I worked so hard to get into the student council.”
At my words, Chizuru-san responded with “Now that you mention it,”
“Key-kun, you entered through the ‘Excellence Program.’ …… even though you don’t seem like the type of person who would be able to do that.”
“Yeah, that’s true. No matter how you look at him, he’s just an idiot pervert.”
Minatsu agreed and Mafuyu-chan smiled awkwardly.
As I tried to object, the president slammed her hands down on the desk.
“It’s terrible to say, but the way this school selects student council members is definitely odd! The popularity vote is odd, but the ‘Excellence Program’ is too! Rather than just grades, they should include looking at mental stability!”
I don’t know how many times the president has already complained about this. I gave my usual response.
“But I think this system is the best.”
Student council member selection at this school is very different from the process at other schools.
First off, members are chosen by a pure ‘popularity vote.’ However, people almost always chose by physical appearance, which resulted in cute-looking girls always being elected. Frankly, it’s a beauty contest.
Both guys and girls yearn for the thing known as the beautiful woman. Male beauty occasionally draws objection from other boys. As I thought, cuteness is justice. (8)
Moreover, this system actually made sense. Although they chose based on appearance, because there was no campaigning, students just ended up picking the people they admire from their everyday lives.
Due to that, if the “admired students” stood up there, everyone actually listens to what the student council has to say. Besides…… frankly, you can elect anybody into the student council, and they’ll manage to figure out their job out one way or another. Choosing by appearance isn’t a big problem. As long as they have charisma it’s fine.
As a result, the student council became a gathering place for beautiful girls.
However, there is a compromise. That is the “Excellence Program.” Each year, the highest scoring student…… the highest scoring student of the end of the year exam, if they wanted to, could enter the student council. The official reason is so that from this, excellent and talented people are also brought in. Normally, the smart ones are the ones who spend their time studying, so there aren’t many people who join that way.
However, at the end of the year, there was someone at the top who expressed his wish to enter the student council…… Me, Sugisaki Ken. The reason was simple. That is……
“But I have to admit, what Ken did was impressive. That power isn’t common.”
Minatsu looked astonished at me. The president also muttered “indeed” with a sigh.
“I’ll do anything to enter the ‘All-Beautiful-Girls-Except-for-Me Community.’ Yes. Even though I entered with the lowest grades, it was a piece of cake to get to the top in a year.”
“So- somehow, to Mafuyu, Sugisaki-senpai sometimes seems very impressive……”
“Mafuyu! It’s an illusion! Don’t admire someone like Ken!”
Minatsu said something extremely rude.
“I actually am smart, Minatsu.”
“And your motives are impure! To think you wanted to enter the student council that governs the entire student body with this mindset ……”
“Even politicians tend to have scandals with women trouble right? In fact, it’s easier for the more perverted humans to stand on top. I too, even when I become old, do not want to let go of the hungry spirit that lets me peep up a high school girl’s skirt with a hand mirror.”
“Don’t bring out your bad habits here!”
After hearing Minatsu’s remark, , the president seized her chance to interject with a “Yeah!”
“Like I thought, to let them join with just good grades is weird! Due to that, a problem child such as Sugisaki joined……”
“I do think it’s bad that all the members of the student council have fallen madly in love with me……”
“Not a single one of us has!”
“Eeh?!”
“What’s with that vivid surprise?! Your overconfidence is also terrible!”
“No way…… that’s………… only Prez has fallen for me so far……?”
“I haven’t fallen for you!
“Eeeeh?!”
“How about you stop that Masuo-san-style surprise?” (9)
“No way…… Prez. Then, are you saying that night never happened……?”
“Wha- what are you talking about?”
The president grew quiet and started to search her memory.
While everyone was paying attention, I said it.
“That night, didn’t you passionately ask for me countless times in my dreams, Prez?!”
“We have a criminal waiting to happen here! He has the makings of a stalker!”
“So cruel! You toyed with my pure heart!”
“More like you toyed with mine!”
The president cried out exhaustedly as she breathed heavily as she took her seat. Since she was petite, she had no strength. If you brought her into a little fight, you could beat her down easily.
Unable to watch the situation any longer, Chizuru-san closed her notebook and spoke to me.
“Key-kun. It’s not like I hate you, but don’t you think it’s smarter to act a little more sincere? If you want to make a harem, you shouldn’t declare it openly. Rather, wouldn’t going about it sincerely be the correct path?”
“Hmmmm….. Chizuru-san’s reasoning makes sense…… However, it doesn’t matter how you smooth it over, because this is me! Because this body full of desire is the true me! Because I am awkward! And because I am devoted to my libido!”
“You really are rotten to the core.”
Minatsu gave me a cold look. Ah, so tsun. Everyone is still in their tsun period.
That’s fine. Galge serves as my life’s bible…… no, eroge (please don’t say anything about age limits) does as well. It never starts out as a harem, and the best part is when tsun people eventually turn dere. In that sense, I’m in a really lucky position right now.
“Fufufu…… now one by one, the members of the student council will fall into my clutches.”
“He’s even started to call it his clutches……”
Mafuyu-chan gave a bitter smile.
“Well, if you aren’t dere, I could easily change plans to sexually harass you in school.”
“That’s some damn refreshing heresy, bastard.”
Minatsu’s tsun level went off the charts.
I waved my finger at her with a “tsk tsk tsk.”
“It’s alright, Minatsu. I’ll make sure it won’t come to that. In reality, instead of gradually raising everyone’s affection levels in one story, I’ll follow the ‘one person, one story’ format.”
“What?”
“Not just in galge, but in school dramas too, right? The teacher solves the problems of each student one episode at a time, eventually blending in with the class. (10) Then in the final episode, all the students of the class express their gratitude to the teacher, which in a way, is a harem end.”
“You splendidly ruined the feeling of a school drama final episode.”
“Yeah…… starting with Mafuyu-chan who has the most affection for me now, then Prez, Minatsu, and then Chizuru-san, gradually increasing in difficulty and making an impression by solving their problems, until, oh, how strange, everyone ‘s become my captive……”
“Not that it matters, but saying that I’m easier to capture than Chizuru-san annoys me.”
“Mafuyu…… is the first one to be captured……?”
For some reason, Mafuyu-chan was seriously trembling. With excitement, I hope.
The president, still exhausted, lashed out at me.
“Why am I the next easiest to capture after Mafuyu-chan?! You can’t convince me of that!”
“Eh? Well Prez…… aren’t you already at the point where you start to have me on your mind? For example, when I walk with another beautiful girl, you get annoyed, right?”
“When you walk with another beautiful girl, I immediately contact the police and request for her protection!”
“Prez is really jealous.”
“……Ahhh, I want to send you to the cruelest bad end.”
The president’s eyes were dark. She seemed to be shaking with anger, so I averted my eyes.
It seemed that I had run out of allies, so I decided to change the subject.
“But you know, the thing I fear most, is what Prez said first.”
“…? What? What do you mean?”
“Becoming a boring person…… basically, you mean there are people who are in blessed circumstances and don’t realize it right? Talking about now, I…… I have been a part of the student council for a month, and I can’t help but feel that this harem situation is fun. But one day…… what if one day I start to feel like it’s not unusual at all?”
“Ahh. Well, I guess I understand that.”
Unusually, the president agreed with my opinion. Then I sighed.
“Like you said, something like that isn’t something you can just consciously do something about. Same goes for your rank in life. Even when the income of a person with a once prosperous life drops, he wouldn’t be able to tolerate a lower standard of living.”
“Also, that isn’t really a beautiful-loli-girl-like example.”
“It was like that for me, because my father is a manager. I’m saying that income changes, for better or for worse.”
“I see. So Prez, if you don’t stop that hobby of using money to have pretty boys serve you……”
“Don’t lump me together with you! What hobby? I’m not a wicked woman!”
“And then, the habit of slapping men’s cheeks with wads of money, that needs to change……”
“What kind of rich noblewoman do you think I am?! No matter what, the scale doesn’t go that far!”
“You’re just a penniless woman whose only purpose in life is picking up home-invading ants by their limbs……”
“I’m not a dark-natured woman! This isn’t an issue about money!”
Screaming with all her might, the president had tired herself out again…… It was unusual to find a senpai who was so easy to tease.
However, certainly, if you go up a rank, it seems you can’t go back down. Basically, that is what it means to become a boring human.
You suddenly lose sight of the happiness right in front of you. You go higher and higher, but you want to go higher still. But one day, you will reach your limit…… and when you find yourself standing still, you may very well become a ‘boring person’ who finds everything in the world to be boring.”
But……
“Ma, Mafuyu also does not want to become that…… But Mafuyu doesn’t really understand how to avoid such a thing.”
Mafuyu-chan became discouraged. That was exactly it. Wishing for more is a natural human desire, so it is difficult to keep it in check. Chizuru-san had once put it nicely, saying “In the end, we won’t have any choice but to aim for a final state of enlightenment.”
“Ehh, That’s kinda boring.”
Minatsu was irritated…… It was certainly boring. Anyways…… It’s probably because I’m still young, but I had no intentions of aiming for enlightenment, and just wanted to spend my days to the fullest.
Chizuru-san continued.
“Well, some people…… the people called winners, keep moving up steadily. Most people compromise somewhere, and are fairly happy.
“Fairly happy……”
Will I also, in the end, be buried in the average?
I’ll go to a not-so-major company.
I’ll get paid an upper-middle salary.
I’ll work in an unremarkable job.
Even if I try my hardest to get promoted, I won’t get any further than section chief.
No matter how much I work, I won’t be able change the world at all.
Even if I disappear, there will be plenty of people who can replace me.
But without the courage or willpower to escape from that environment, I resign myself to it, with a “Well, I guess this is nice, isn’t it?”
………………
“Well that’s no good.”
“Eh?”
At my muttering, everyone looked towards me. I took in everyone’s stares…… and stood up with all my strength!
“I will create a harem of beautiful girls!”
I declared that loudly!
Minatsu said with amazement, “Even if he says that as if he were announcing, ‘I’m going to be King of the Pirates’……” (11) The others gave me looks that said “again?”, but nevertheless, I continued.
“Even if I have to compromise, I’ll compromise high! I’ll have beautiful girls serve me, and someday, I’ll reach the point and say, ‘Ah, I’m bored of beautiful girls,’ and then I’ll compromise!”
“…… I see. So, you just want to keep going and see how far you get. Well, that’s not bad at all. I like that idea.”
Chizuru-san smiled for some reason. Oh, did her affection points go up? As usual, I received appreciation where it wasn’t intended.
Minatsu also said with a smile, “Well, aside from the harem, that stance isn’t bad.” Mafuyu-chan, smiling gently said, “That’s true…… Rather than be troubled, it might be better to go on for the time being.”
And then the president spoke……
“Eh, I’m too tired to work…”
A hopeless person.
She hadn’t reached enlightenment and wasn’t aiming to go up further, but seemed to have already compromised.
She seemed satisfied with just being the student council president.
While she stuffed her mouth and crunched on snacks, she had some sort of happy face on.
………… Well, that’s fine.
Yeah, it’s fine as long as she’s happy. It was sweet and simple.
The president finished the snacks (even though they were Chizuru-san’s……), and let out a cute burp, making it known that she was satisfied.
“With that, shall we disband for today?”
“…………”
Everyone thought she was an amazingly hopeless person.
Well, because of that, we all disbanded anyway.
…… I also really had to get to work.
***
TRANSLATOR’S NOTES
(1) Higurashi, as in Higurashi no Naku Koro ni (Higurashi: When They Cry).
(2) Reference to Suzumiya Haruhi no Yuuutsu (The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya).
(3) The Sneaker, the company that serialized the Suzumiya Haruhi novels, among others.
(4) Guess who published Seitokai no Ichizon.
(5) Aka = Red = Crimson.
(6) Aka-chan = Baby.
(7) Just as a general note, older/more experienced people are usually referred to with titles while younger/less experienced people are referred to by name or nickname.
(8) Reference to Ichigo Mashimaro’s tagline, “Kawaii ha, seigi!”
(9) Reference to Sazae-san, essentially the longest running anime series, at almost 7000 episodes
(10) A reference to Great Teacher Onizuka, GTO.
(11) One Piece reference.
VOLUME 1
[1st Discussion ~ The Chatty Student Council]
“There is nothing boring in the world. It is you who have become boring!”
As usual, the president stuck out her small chest and proudly spoke as if she were reciting something she probably read in some book.
However this occasion left me with a deep impression. I see, that’s it.
As I gained more experience, I became a boring person who had trouble finding anything fun.
In this world, nothing is more fun than “firsts.”
First love.
First true friend.
First time getting in trouble.
First success.
First…… eroge?
Well even so, whenever I think about fun things, I return to those thoughts.
“Those were fun times.”
When I entered nursery school, it didn’t matter that I was physically the same as everyone else.
When I was in primary school, I was so happy to carry my little backpack.
When I advanced to middle school, I felt like an adult when I showed my bus pass.
When I was accepted into high school, I remember enjoying myself scoring higher than the others and seizing victory.
Well, that sort of meaning, or so I’d like to say……
“So, are you saying virgins aren’t that bad?”
“Puh-!”
My question caused the president to choke, making her spit out her tea at full force and cough violently. As usual, she was extremely susceptible to my ad-lib. Because it was just us two today, I could tease her a lot.
The president was teary-eyed. She wiped the table in front of her with tissues and glared at me.
“How did you arrive at that conclusion from what I just said?”
“How naïve Prez. My train of thought leads directly to that!”
“What pride! Be more aware of your position as vice president, Sugisaki……”
“I am aware. I am perfectly aware that this student council is my harem –”
“Excuse me. Enough with your awareness of being vice president, but why don’t you start by discarding that other self-awareness.”
The president was sincere in her retorts toward me today, as well. Like I thought, the president is cute.
She was small and short compared to me. In addition, she tried to compensate for her childish appearance by standing on her toes and running around desperately trying to deal with being student council president, both of which made her even more moe.
Yes, moe. The number of girls that can be described with that word are few. That cuteness was already recognized by all the students in the school. She was too cute. Once they saw the president in person, they no longer could feel attracted to moe anime or manga characters.
“Prezzz.”
“What is it?”
The president rolled up the tissues that she used to wipe the tea, and aimed, trying to shoot them into the trash bin in the corner of the student council room. She was too cute, seriously aiming with one eye closed.
I sat my elbow on the desk, and decided to inform this president.
“I like you. Please go out with me.”
“Nyawa!”
The bundle of tissues flew spectacularly in the opposite direction.
The president glared at me once again, teary-eyed.
“Sugisaki, how can you just superficially confess like that?”
“Because I’m serious.”
“That’s a lie!”
“Prez, ‘Hi**rashi’ material is really old” (1)
Even though her teary eyes trembled, she said it without a hint of tragedy.
“Sugisaki, don’t you dare say you’ve forgotten what you said when you first showed up in this student council!”
“What was it? Umm…… ‘Don’t bother, go on without me!’ was it?”
“What kind of situation did the student council start out in?! That wasn’t it!”
“Huh? Then… ‘I have no interest in ordinary humans. Aliens, Time travelers –’” (2)
“That’s dangerous, Sugisaki! In many ways!”
“It’s fine. I prefer the original work.”
“What kind of reassurance is that?! Also, the anime was godly!”
The president seems to have also seen it…… No, isn’t it bad if we delve deeper into this topic? Have I labeled her wrongly? Let’s quickly remember that time.
…… Right, right. I am certain, that at that time, when the members of the student council gathered…… I faced four beautiful girls, and made an announcement.
“I love you all. I love you all very much. All of you, go out with me. Because I will absolutely make you happy.”
“That’s right! From that time, you were well known to this student council for your irresponsibility! Who in the world are you saying would be swayed by a person who says, ‘I don’t care who, just go out with me?!’”
“How rude. I do care who. As they say in S**aker Bunko, ‘I have no interests except for beautiful girls.’” (3)
“So you’re saying anyone is fine as long as they’re cute right?! If you’re going with that, why don’t you at least go compare with something like Fujimi Fantasia Bunko!” (4)
“I am wholehearted! For beautiful girls!”
“Such a broad criteria!”
“Beautiful girls are a rare species.”
“That’s not the issue! It isn’t sincere when you confess to several people at once!”
“Eeh? Isn’t that better than an indecisive protagonist? Starting with a bang from ‘I’ll aim for the harem route!’ would be a manly declaration, right?”
“Unfortunately your specs are different from a popular galge protagonist!”
“Then what kind of protagonist would you say I am?! Even though I like girls this much!”
“Basically, you aren’t a protagonist, you’re a villain! You’re on the side that gets weeded out! Either that or the unimportant best friend of the protagonist! You’re necessary to give a good reaction to gags!”
The president was very well-informed on the subject.
“But my face is nice-”
“That’s just because the artist is good!”
So says the beautiful girl-character president…… was what I thought, but well, whatever.
While I was speaking, I went and picked up the president’s missed tissue, shooting it a short distance into the trash bin.
“…………”
The president gave me a complex look as she sat down. I returned to my own seat and tilted my head.
“What’s wrong, Prez?”
“…… Sugisaki, you sometimes say that your nature is effective, affectionate…… unconsciously.”
“Yeah. That sort of gap lets my affection level increase at a high rate right?”
“That’s your aim!? Damn it! How much has my affection level already increased by?!
“Fufufu…… Well, that was an exaggeration, but more or less it’s definitely what my aim is. But it’s an old habit because I’m popular with women. Now it’s mostly unconscious.”
“Hmm…… This ero power isn’t common.”
“Yes, it isn’t common, this power of mine. When I arrive at the end of the harem route, I’ll need a lot of stamina after all.”
“Ahhh, don’t tell me why you need stamina! “
In accordance with the President’s loli appearance, she couldn’t handle this sort of story. She blocked her ears…… So cute.
However……
“Prez. That reaction is proof that you already know what I was about to say.”
“………………hau.”
She turned red. She fidgeted…… How cute. She really is cute, the president. Ahhh, now I remember that the president was such a huge part of making me want to join…
And as I continued to tease the president for that reason, it really is a shame that as if to interrupt our time, someone opened the student council room door.
“Key-kun. It’s bad to tease Aka-chan too much.”
The one who just spoke was Chizuru-san, the female secretary and a third-year like the president, who just entered the room.
By the way, ‘Key-kun’ refers to me. My name is written with the kanji for ‘key’ and pronounced as ‘Ken,’ therefore, Key-kun.
Also, ‘Aka-chan’ refers to the president. This is also because the president’s name is ‘Kurimu,’ and kurimuzon = crimson, so Aka-chan. (5) Both are very simple nicknames, but ones which pleased Chizuru-san. The president herself would cry out “I’m not a baby!” (6) and get angry, but when she told us with her loli face, Chizuru-san and I couldn’t help but just think “it fits her exactly.”
It’s just, fundamentally, she’s the type of person who refers to classmates by last names and underclassmen by first names. (7) To that end, I am honored for her to call me by a nickname, but according to Chizuru-san, “It’s not like it means I like you more or something.” …… Girls are mysteries.
Now then, Chizuru-san was the opposite type of person from the president. She was tall, with a body that was filled out and slender in the right places. She had natural long black hair that was fluid and silky, with an entrancing adult charm. She also had a cool personality, but was kind at the same time……
In a different sense than the president, it could be said that she is an ideal girl. No, rather than an ideal girl, one might say she’s a beautiful woman.
Watching as she sat down across from me, I rebutted.
“I’m not teasing her or anything. I’m only embarrassing her.”
“In a way, isn’t that also a pretty terrible thing to do?”
“It’s alright. We’ve agreed on it.”
As I explained myself, the president shouted “That’s a lie!” again, which I ignored.
In that pause, the president sulked, so I spoke to Chizuru-san.
“However, it seems like my harem is having trouble gathering today.”
“It’s the student council, not your harem. But isn’t this alright? It’s not like we’re having an event or planning anything. Lately, at these meetings, all we do is eat snacks and chat.
As she said this, Chizuru-san quickly pulled out a bottle of mineral water from her bag and drank from it.
“You just don’t get it, Chizuru-san. If we don’t meet, my affection level won’t increase. Look, in galge, don’t you choose heroines based on different places?”
“That’s still pretty troubling, even if you say that as if it’s the most obvious fact in the world.”
“Basically, if they don’t come to the student council room, I can’t raise their affection, so even if there isn’t an event, they should come here-”
“Rather, that’s why they aren’t coming.”
I was hit with a swift and harsh retort. Chizuru-san…… she wasn’t a straightforward tsun like the president, but occasionally was a bit cruel. The psychological damage she could do was pretty high.
I cleared my throat with a cough and tried to think positively.
“But, Chizuru-san, you came to nurture your love for me, right?!”
“……………… Ah, yeah, sure.”
It was worse than getting rejected. Such incredible inattentiveness. She had pulled out a snack from her bag and started her homework while crunching away.
“Ku…… But when this type of cool character falls in love, they will definitely, without a doubt be passionate about it!”
“Ah, that’s true. I will be passionate. In primary school I sent three hundred letters everyday to my first love saying only ‘I like you.’ In the end, his mind broke, because he was unexpectedly fragile. Since then I’ve lost interest in love…… I wonder if you’re the same.”
She watched me with narrowed eyes, and a thin smile appeared on her lips.
It was significantly more scary than the president’s “Hi**rashi” joke.
It can’t be helped……
“I understand.”
“Eh, after hearing that story, are you prepared? You’ll accept all of me? You’re getting lots of points for that, Key-kun. I’m sure that my flag is somewhat –”
“I’m only looking for a physical relationship with you, Chizuru-san! We don’t need love!”
“……………… So, the next homework problem,”
I was splendidly ignored. Oh well. But…… “Only looking for a physical relationship.” In the worst case scenario, wouldn’t that be even harder than getting a girlfriend? …… Mu.
While thinking that, I suddenly noticed that the president had reached out and took one of Chizuru-san’s snacks. Right before she ate it, I warned her.
“You’ll get fat.”
“Uguu……I- it’s fine. The nutrition will go to my height and chest!”
“Yes, but the risk of it going to your stomach is also pretty high.”
“I-it’s fine! Because it’s hard for me to get fat!”
“It’s also hard for your height and chest to grow.”
“…… Hyah! Chomp!”
Ah, she ate it.
“The next answer to the next question is…… alright ‘metabolic syndrome.’”
“…………”
Chizuru-san said something cruel while looking at her notebook. Did she really have a question like that?
But from eating just one piece, the president’s excitement lessened…… But in the end, despite the worry, she still continued to eat.
I placed my hand on the president’s softly trembling shoulder.
“It’s okay, Prez. If no one will accept you……”
“Eh? You don’t mean…… even if I get fat, you would still like me? Even if I’m not a beautiful girl anymore? Sugisaki…… you……”
Tears welled up in the president’s eyes. I smiled at her.
“If no one will accept you…… please dedicate yourself to your job.”
“Realistic advice?!”
“I’ll support you from the shadows!”
“Why from the shadows?! Basically, you’ll abandon me! I have no value if I’m fat!”
“Well, that’s why I’m encouraging you to work hard not to become fat.”
“Auu.”
The president’s shoulders dropped. In reality if it were her, becoming a little pudgy was cute in its own right…… but even then, as a member of my harem, it would be an issue if she got careless with herself. For example, you can’t survive if you stop paying attention to your feminine side after you become a mother!
“Work hard to stay in my harem!”
“Ah, somehow I suddenly feel like it’s ok to be fat.”
“…………”
Why does it seem like everyone is so tsun? If I couldn’t get even one of them to be dere to me soon, I would die of loneliness. There is nothing as miserable as a galge protagonist who wasn’t popular with girls. Furthermore, a more miserable life would be one where you have a lot of chances, but you end up in the “best friends” ending.
–
Chizuru-san started taking out things to genuinely work on her homework, and the president seriously started eating snacks as if in a trance.
Unbelievably bored, I was thinking of another topic to talk about, when the door rattled open and two girls entered.
“Ahh, sorry for being laaaate~~!”
“E-excuse us.”
Two people with contrasting personalities entered.
The energetic girl walking in front was Shiina Minatsu, a vice president like me, as well as my classmate.
Her long hair was tied in twintails, and because she was in “this student council” it was a given that she was a beautiful girl.
She hadn’t joined any specific clubs, but had good reflexes and was boyish…… actually, her way of speaking was also masculine. Because she was refreshing and cheerful, she was not only popular with guys but also had high popularity with girls. Furthermore, she had a rare yuri feeling about her, so her popularity skyrocketed because of that.
It’s just…… from that, she seemed to hate men like me, helped by the fact that we were both vice president in the same class, and tended to be hostile to me. A textbook tsundere…… but the problem was she wasn’t dere.
And in the background, the girl who’s bowing her head behind us, and who looked away the minute I made eye contact with her was Shiina Mafuyu. She was Minatsu’s younger sister and a first year. She was the treasurer, but well, in this student council there wasn’t much of a distinction between one position and another.
It almost was as if all her energy had been sucked out by her older sister before she had been born. She was also bad with guys, and that did endear her to some of the boys in the school. Well…… the cause of her hate of guys definitely comes from her sister (I believe her sister’s yuri preference convinced her that men were something to be feared).
She had white skin and was easy to recognize from the charming little ribbon she wore in her straight, light-colored hair. She also refers to herself as “Mafuyu” which is also very fitting. Due to that childishness and cuteness, everyone adds “-chan” to her name. For some reason, adding “-san” or not using an honorific didn’t seem right. Only her sister Minatsu called her “Mafuyu,” which strangely fit.
When the Shiina sisters took their places, I spoke to them.
“Oh yeah, Minatsu and Mafuyu-chan, did you have a ‘something that started out very fun’?”
I decided to return to the original topic.
“What is this, out of nowhere?”
Minatsu, who was sitting next to me looked at me with suspicion.
“Well, the president finally said something interesting: the world doesn’t become boring, but you yourself become boring. So something good that happened a long time ago.”
“What do you mean ‘finally’?!”
The president made a fuss again, but she was ignored. The Shiina sisters thought seriously.
Mafuyu-chan, who was sitting diagonally from me, was the first to answer.
“Fo-for Mafuyu, it was……cosmetics?”
“Make-up?”
“Yes. When Mafuyu was little, Mafuyu watched mother use it and couldn’t help but want to do the same. So then in middle school, Mafuyu bought her first cosmetics and was unbearably happy…… But now that Mafuyu thinks about it, Mafuyu doesn’t really like to dress up. Like recently, Mafuyu only wants to do the bare minimum.”
“Ah, I see. That’s so like Mafuyu-chan. It’s alright Mafuyu-chan! You’re already cute enough without make-up! Make-up hides your natural beauty, so it’s better to not use it!”
“Th-thank you……”
“Hey, Ken! Don’t hit on my sister in front of me!”
At my words, Mafuyu-chan’s cheeks flushed and she shyly shrunk back, while Minatsu lashed out. The same as ever. I sighed and put a hand on Minatsu’s shoulder.
“Now now. Don’t be jealous, Minatsu…… You’re pretty charming yourself!”
“No no, I’m not jealous!”
“After all Minatsu, if we were to get married, Mafuyu-chan would become my sister-in-law which is also a charming –”
“That’s not even my own charm!”
Minatsu was really angry…… such a cute girl. She doesn’t need to be so jealous……
“I said I’m not burning with jealousy!”
“Oh! You can even tell what I’m thinking! I can see the finish line!”
“Geez, you’re scaring me! Somehow you’re just scary! Your crazy delusions are too scary!”
“Delusions?… Well, alright, if you want, I’ll pretend they’re delusions. You’re so shy♪♪”
“I-I want to kill him……”
Minatsu shook at my words while Mafuyu-chan desperately tried to calm her down.
Well, it seemed that the student council members have all gathered today.
I saw myself surrounded by four beautiful girls, and I rejoiced to myself.
“Yes, harem banzai. I always love seeing this sight. I’m really glad I worked so hard to get into the student council.”
At my words, Chizuru-san responded with “Now that you mention it,”
“Key-kun, you entered through the ‘Excellence Program.’ …… even though you don’t seem like the type of person who would be able to do that.”
“Yeah, that’s true. No matter how you look at him, he’s just an idiot pervert.”
Minatsu agreed and Mafuyu-chan smiled awkwardly.
As I tried to object, the president slammed her hands down on the desk.
“It’s terrible to say, but the way this school selects student council members is definitely odd! The popularity vote is odd, but the ‘Excellence Program’ is too! Rather than just grades, they should include looking at mental stability!”
I don’t know how many times the president has already complained about this. I gave my usual response.
“But I think this system is the best.”
Student council member selection at this school is very different from the process at other schools.
First off, members are chosen by a pure ‘popularity vote.’ However, people almost always chose by physical appearance, which resulted in cute-looking girls always being elected. Frankly, it’s a beauty contest.
Both guys and girls yearn for the thing known as the beautiful woman. Male beauty occasionally draws objection from other boys. As I thought, cuteness is justice. (8)
Moreover, this system actually made sense. Although they chose based on appearance, because there was no campaigning, students just ended up picking the people they admire from their everyday lives.
Due to that, if the “admired students” stood up there, everyone actually listens to what the student council has to say. Besides…… frankly, you can elect anybody into the student council, and they’ll manage to figure out their job out one way or another. Choosing by appearance isn’t a big problem. As long as they have charisma it’s fine.
As a result, the student council became a gathering place for beautiful girls.
However, there is a compromise. That is the “Excellence Program.” Each year, the highest scoring student…… the highest scoring student of the end of the year exam, if they wanted to, could enter the student council. The official reason is so that from this, excellent and talented people are also brought in. Normally, the smart ones are the ones who spend their time studying, so there aren’t many people who join that way.
However, at the end of the year, there was someone at the top who expressed his wish to enter the student council…… Me, Sugisaki Ken. The reason was simple. That is……
“But I have to admit, what Ken did was impressive. That power isn’t common.”
Minatsu looked astonished at me. The president also muttered “indeed” with a sigh.
“I’ll do anything to enter the ‘All-Beautiful-Girls-Except-for-Me Community.’ Yes. Even though I entered with the lowest grades, it was a piece of cake to get to the top in a year.”
“So- somehow, to Mafuyu, Sugisaki-senpai sometimes seems very impressive……”
“Mafuyu! It’s an illusion! Don’t admire someone like Ken!”
Minatsu said something extremely rude.
“I actually am smart, Minatsu.”
“And your motives are impure! To think you wanted to enter the student council that governs the entire student body with this mindset ……”
“Even politicians tend to have scandals with women trouble right? In fact, it’s easier for the more perverted humans to stand on top. I too, even when I become old, do not want to let go of the hungry spirit that lets me peep up a high school girl’s skirt with a hand mirror.”
“Don’t bring out your bad habits here!”
After hearing Minatsu’s remark, , the president seized her chance to interject with a “Yeah!”
“Like I thought, to let them join with just good grades is weird! Due to that, a problem child such as Sugisaki joined……”
“I do think it’s bad that all the members of the student council have fallen madly in love with me……”
“Not a single one of us has!”
“Eeh?!”
“What’s with that vivid surprise?! Your overconfidence is also terrible!”
“No way…… that’s………… only Prez has fallen for me so far……?”
“I haven’t fallen for you!
“Eeeeh?!”
“How about you stop that Masuo-san-style surprise?” (9)
“No way…… Prez. Then, are you saying that night never happened……?”
“Wha- what are you talking about?”
The president grew quiet and started to search her memory.
While everyone was paying attention, I said it.
“That night, didn’t you passionately ask for me countless times in my dreams, Prez?!”
“We have a criminal waiting to happen here! He has the makings of a stalker!”
“So cruel! You toyed with my pure heart!”
“More like you toyed with mine!”
The president cried out exhaustedly as she breathed heavily as she took her seat. Since she was petite, she had no strength. If you brought her into a little fight, you could beat her down easily.
Unable to watch the situation any longer, Chizuru-san closed her notebook and spoke to me.
“Key-kun. It’s not like I hate you, but don’t you think it’s smarter to act a little more sincere? If you want to make a harem, you shouldn’t declare it openly. Rather, wouldn’t going about it sincerely be the correct path?”
“Hmmmm….. Chizuru-san’s reasoning makes sense…… However, it doesn’t matter how you smooth it over, because this is me! Because this body full of desire is the true me! Because I am awkward! And because I am devoted to my libido!”
“You really are rotten to the core.”
Minatsu gave me a cold look. Ah, so tsun. Everyone is still in their tsun period.
That’s fine. Galge serves as my life’s bible…… no, eroge (please don’t say anything about age limits) does as well. It never starts out as a harem, and the best part is when tsun people eventually turn dere. In that sense, I’m in a really lucky position right now.
“Fufufu…… now one by one, the members of the student council will fall into my clutches.”
“He’s even started to call it his clutches……”
Mafuyu-chan gave a bitter smile.
“Well, if you aren’t dere, I could easily change plans to sexually harass you in school.”
“That’s some damn refreshing heresy, bastard.”
Minatsu’s tsun level went off the charts.
I waved my finger at her with a “tsk tsk tsk.”
“It’s alright, Minatsu. I’ll make sure it won’t come to that. In reality, instead of gradually raising everyone’s affection levels in one story, I’ll follow the ‘one person, one story’ format.”
“What?”
“Not just in galge, but in school dramas too, right? The teacher solves the problems of each student one episode at a time, eventually blending in with the class. (10) Then in the final episode, all the students of the class express their gratitude to the teacher, which in a way, is a harem end.”
“You splendidly ruined the feeling of a school drama final episode.”
“Yeah…… starting with Mafuyu-chan who has the most affection for me now, then Prez, Minatsu, and then Chizuru-san, gradually increasing in difficulty and making an impression by solving their problems, until, oh, how strange, everyone ‘s become my captive……”
“Not that it matters, but saying that I’m easier to capture than Chizuru-san annoys me.”
“Mafuyu…… is the first one to be captured……?”
For some reason, Mafuyu-chan was seriously trembling. With excitement, I hope.
The president, still exhausted, lashed out at me.
“Why am I the next easiest to capture after Mafuyu-chan?! You can’t convince me of that!”
“Eh? Well Prez…… aren’t you already at the point where you start to have me on your mind? For example, when I walk with another beautiful girl, you get annoyed, right?”
“When you walk with another beautiful girl, I immediately contact the police and request for her protection!”
“Prez is really jealous.”
“……Ahhh, I want to send you to the cruelest bad end.”
The president’s eyes were dark. She seemed to be shaking with anger, so I averted my eyes.
It seemed that I had run out of allies, so I decided to change the subject.
“But you know, the thing I fear most, is what Prez said first.”
“…? What? What do you mean?”
“Becoming a boring person…… basically, you mean there are people who are in blessed circumstances and don’t realize it right? Talking about now, I…… I have been a part of the student council for a month, and I can’t help but feel that this harem situation is fun. But one day…… what if one day I start to feel like it’s not unusual at all?”
“Ahh. Well, I guess I understand that.”
Unusually, the president agreed with my opinion. Then I sighed.
“Like you said, something like that isn’t something you can just consciously do something about. Same goes for your rank in life. Even when the income of a person with a once prosperous life drops, he wouldn’t be able to tolerate a lower standard of living.”
“Also, that isn’t really a beautiful-loli-girl-like example.”
“It was like that for me, because my father is a manager. I’m saying that income changes, for better or for worse.”
“I see. So Prez, if you don’t stop that hobby of using money to have pretty boys serve you……”
“Don’t lump me together with you! What hobby? I’m not a wicked woman!”
“And then, the habit of slapping men’s cheeks with wads of money, that needs to change……”
“What kind of rich noblewoman do you think I am?! No matter what, the scale doesn’t go that far!”
“You’re just a penniless woman whose only purpose in life is picking up home-invading ants by their limbs……”
“I’m not a dark-natured woman! This isn’t an issue about money!”
Screaming with all her might, the president had tired herself out again…… It was unusual to find a senpai who was so easy to tease.
However, certainly, if you go up a rank, it seems you can’t go back down. Basically, that is what it means to become a boring human.
You suddenly lose sight of the happiness right in front of you. You go higher and higher, but you want to go higher still. But one day, you will reach your limit…… and when you find yourself standing still, you may very well become a ‘boring person’ who finds everything in the world to be boring.”
But……
“Ma, Mafuyu also does not want to become that…… But Mafuyu doesn’t really understand how to avoid such a thing.”
Mafuyu-chan became discouraged. That was exactly it. Wishing for more is a natural human desire, so it is difficult to keep it in check. Chizuru-san had once put it nicely, saying “In the end, we won’t have any choice but to aim for a final state of enlightenment.”
“Ehh, That’s kinda boring.”
Minatsu was irritated…… It was certainly boring. Anyways…… It’s probably because I’m still young, but I had no intentions of aiming for enlightenment, and just wanted to spend my days to the fullest.
Chizuru-san continued.
“Well, some people…… the people called winners, keep moving up steadily. Most people compromise somewhere, and are fairly happy.
“Fairly happy……”
Will I also, in the end, be buried in the average?
I’ll go to a not-so-major company.
I’ll get paid an upper-middle salary.
I’ll work in an unremarkable job.
Even if I try my hardest to get promoted, I won’t get any further than section chief.
No matter how much I work, I won’t be able change the world at all.
Even if I disappear, there will be plenty of people who can replace me.
But without the courage or willpower to escape from that environment, I resign myself to it, with a “Well, I guess this is nice, isn’t it?”
………………
“Well that’s no good.”
“Eh?”
At my muttering, everyone looked towards me. I took in everyone’s stares…… and stood up with all my strength!
“I will create a harem of beautiful girls!”
I declared that loudly!
Minatsu said with amazement, “Even if he says that as if he were announcing, ‘I’m going to be King of the Pirates’……” (11) The others gave me looks that said “again?”, but nevertheless, I continued.
“Even if I have to compromise, I’ll compromise high! I’ll have beautiful girls serve me, and someday, I’ll reach the point and say, ‘Ah, I’m bored of beautiful girls,’ and then I’ll compromise!”
“…… I see. So, you just want to keep going and see how far you get. Well, that’s not bad at all. I like that idea.”
Chizuru-san smiled for some reason. Oh, did her affection points go up? As usual, I received appreciation where it wasn’t intended.
Minatsu also said with a smile, “Well, aside from the harem, that stance isn’t bad.” Mafuyu-chan, smiling gently said, “That’s true…… Rather than be troubled, it might be better to go on for the time being.”
And then the president spoke……
“Eh, I’m too tired to work…”
A hopeless person.
She hadn’t reached enlightenment and wasn’t aiming to go up further, but seemed to have already compromised.
She seemed satisfied with just being the student council president.
While she stuffed her mouth and crunched on snacks, she had some sort of happy face on.
………… Well, that’s fine.
Yeah, it’s fine as long as she’s happy. It was sweet and simple.
The president finished the snacks (even though they were Chizuru-san’s……), and let out a cute burp, making it known that she was satisfied.
“With that, shall we disband for today?”
“…………”
Everyone thought she was an amazingly hopeless person.
Well, because of that, we all disbanded anyway.
…… I also really had to get to work.
***
TRANSLATOR’S NOTES
(1) Higurashi, as in Higurashi no Naku Koro ni (Higurashi: When They Cry).
(2) Reference to Suzumiya Haruhi no Yuuutsu (The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya).
(3) The Sneaker, the company that serialized the Suzumiya Haruhi novels, among others.
(4) Guess who published Seitokai no Ichizon.
(5) Aka = Red = Crimson.
(6) Aka-chan = Baby.
(7) Just as a general note, older/more experienced people are usually referred to with titles while younger/less experienced people are referred to by name or nickname.
(8) Reference to Ichigo Mashimaro’s tagline, “Kawaii ha, seigi!”
(9) Reference to Sazae-san, essentially the longest running anime series, at almost 7000 episodes
(10) A reference to Great Teacher Onizuka, GTO.
(11) One Piece reference.
