At the thought of how that shithead death-seeking fatty had profited, Shen Qingmei was furious to the point of her teeth itching, her heart and lungs scratching, her stomach and liver burning! One hundred million grass mud horses running across the Mahler Gobi desert were not enough to convey just how devastated she felt!
Just what kind of evil did she wrought on herself, for the Heavens to punish her like so?
Only after she half-heartedly ate her dinner, tastelessly chewing on a few mouthfuls of rice, did she finally get enough energy to rise from bed.
In the entire Inner Palace, there was apparently only one eunuch that served her, the stately crown prince!! There weren’t even palace maids! Just how terrible was the previous owner of this body?!
Still, Shen Qingmei couldn’t help but feel some amazement. Since she was apparently the His Majesty the Crown Prince, no matter what, with this kind of identity, just how had she been bullied to this extent? No matter how weak the previous body was, no matter how cowardly they were, the emperor had still decided to make her the heir presumptive to the throne!
Waving her hands, she summoned the reluctant-looking eunuch. Shen Qingmei rubbed her temples, feigning a headache.
“Um… where is this place? Who am I??
“Eh…..?!”
Having not expected this kind of question, the eunuch could only stare at her blankly. His mouth fell open in shock.
For the sake of the person in front of her, Shen Qingmei gave a faint smile, hinting towards her meaning.
“Cough… um, I seem to be unable to remember anything.”
Contrary to Shen Qingmei’s expectations, the eunuch did not react in the way that most side-characters did in transmigration stories. He didn’t seem to be surprised, or troubled, or nervous, or try to soothe her panic. Instead, he turned around and left, shouting as he ran:
“There’s trouble! It’s terrible! The Crown Prince has lost his memory! The Crown Prince has lost his memory!”
Shen Qingmei: …
What the fuck!
Tears streamed across her face, falling to the ground in puddles.
A homophone pun: 内牛满面 [nèi niú mǎn miàn], or inner cow whole face, is a corruption of 泪流满面 [lèi liú mǎnmiàn], which means to have tears streaking all across your face.
The eunuch continued to shout, and in a gust of wind had run far away. No matter how many times Shen Qingmei tried to call for him to come back, she was ultimately helpless and could only rely on herself to slowly and tortuously put on a pair of shoes.
She was currently wearing a white top and pants. However, she didn’t know if this was a blessing or a curse. After she had fallen into the water, the person who was forced to change her clothes was that one eunuch. The eunuch was apparently the Crown Prince’s confidant and knew about the Prince’s “transvestite” status long before, which is why he could change her clothes without being shocked.
Thinking of this, Shen Qingmei couldn’t help but bear a silent grudge.
But at the very least… she wasn’t completely alone! Ying, ying…
Ying, ying [嘤嘤] is basically Chinese slang for crying. Used in memes (esp with lolis) to make you feel that the subject is pitiable and thus cute.
Although she already knew what her current body looked like, Shen Qingmei couldn’t help but hold onto a single thread of hope. Slowly, she walked in front of the mirror, where she carefully examined at every inch of her face.
After a few seconds.
Crash!
The entire body weight of the ball collapsed onto the ground.
Your mother, what kind of despair was this?!
This was really too horrible to look at!! No wonder everyone seemed to spurn and avoid her! Before she had carefully examined her appearance, Shen Qingmei had cursed those people for judging her by her appearance. However, seeing her current face, Shen Qingmei felt… she completely understood their actions!
For a person to be this fat was already too much. However, if they were this ugly, short of completely melting down and reconstructing their features, even Korea’s best plastic surgeons wouldn’t be able to save this dumpster fire of a face!
Staring at the person in the mirror, Shen Qingmei’s first thought was: Fuck, this person’s actually a fucking ball!
Her second thought was: It’s not your fault that you were born this ugly, but it’s your fault for scaring people with it!!
Her third thought was: The fuck, this Emperor’s sense of aesthetics is really too off! To choose a Crown Prince that looks like this, aren’t you basically throwing him to the wolves?
Shen Qingmei couldn’t hold back anymore. How come all the other transmigrators got to be beauties or handsome bros? Why was she the only one transmigrated into a giant ball?! So what if the Crown Prince was a prestigious position? Weren’t the Crown Princes being talked about all fucking smart and handsome and rich, so that everyone flocked to them??? If the Crown Prince was a round ball, all they would be was despised!
However, the facts were all arranged in front of her eyes. No matter how much Shen Qingmei protested, no matter how much she screamed, no matter how much she raged, nothing could be changed!
The only thing she could do was become a warrior, gather up her boldness, and face that bloody forest of people in front of her head on…
Tears clouding her vision as she stared at the round sphere in the mirror, Shen Qingmei could only try and console herself. At least she still looked fairly normal. Her eyes, nose, and ears were in the right places, and her skin color appeared to be normal, not black or red or green or a multi-colored rainbow. At least she had all four limbs, not a paraplegic or some three-headed six-armed creature…
But… she was still too fucking fat! You couldn’t deny that she was fat to the point of her face swelling up!
For other transmigrators, their first priorities were to either take advantage of their cheating OP abilities or elevate their status, and make a storm in their new world!
However, for her? Her only plans in the foreseeable future were to lose weight, to lose weight, and to lose weight…
She moped, depressed, on the floor.
It wasn’t until after three days that her first visitor arrived.
“Where is the Crown Prince?”
“His Highness is inside!”
Hearing the sound of footsteps, Shen Qingmei retreated her 45° gaze of suffering towards the Heavens and looked at her new visitor.
“45° angle looking at the Heavens” is a short story/poem by young adult writer Guo Jingming, also known as the most hated male celebrity in China for 3 years in a row. Per usual, Chinese netizens made his angsty writing a meme.
This voice appeared to be the same person that she had heard that day by the lake. So, she deduced, this was probably the same fellow that the original owner was head over heals for. Or, the person that the nuisance of a princess called “Eldest Prince”!
At that time she had been extremely furious, and had only wanted to retaliate against that loathsome girl. Therefore, she had not paid careful attention to anyone else, even the Eldest Prince.
Now that she had transmigrated into this body, she needed to be aware of the circumstances around her. Therefore, she could guess that this Eldest Imperial Brother… wanted to compete with her for the throne?
The shadows near the hallway stirred. Soon, someone walked into the room briskly. The person glanced at the bed, and seeing that there was no occupant, turned his gaze around the room until it fell onto her.
Shen Qingmei was sitting on the ground in a half kneel. She carefully watched him with narrowed eyes.
She had thought that any blood relative of this damn fatty wouldn’t amount to much, but to her surprise found that the man in front of her was extremely handsome!
The temperature outside was extremely chilly, but he wore little.
He was wearing a pair of blue robes with embedded with white edges, without any other kind of decorations or ornaments present. Apart from his cold demeanor, he seemed to to emit a strange kind of non-human aura.
His long black hair was tied over his head neatly with a simple silver hairpin. His blue robes were made of high quality silk, the cut exposing a sliver of his chest. Any hair not tied up was arranged in an orderly fashion over his back, emphasizing his narrow waist.
His facial features seemed to be of the highest quality. His eyes had a deep and unfathomable aspect to them, his nose was straight and high, his lips were thin and cold, and his face was sharp and angled. He reminded her almost of a wolf king from the desolate wasteland, aggressive yet aloof.
Following the light emitting from the window, Shen Qingmei slowly lowered her gaze to appreciate his body. His wide shoulders, his narrow hips, that perfect, flexible pair of buttocks…
Tsk, this really was high quality goods! No wonder that fatty had been willing to throw away her life for him!
Subjected to Shen Qingmei’s lecherous stare, Huangfu Wujie couldn’t help but feel increasingly uneasy. He was about to open his mouth to speak when he was interrupted by the round ball in front of him.
She gave a faint smile as she asked:
“…Who are you?”
At the thought of how that shithead death-seeking fatty had profited, Shen Qingmei was furious to the point of her teeth itching, her heart and lungs scratching, her stomach and liver burning! One hundred million grass mud horses running across the Mahler Gobi desert were not enough to convey just how devastated she felt!
Just what kind of evil did she wrought on herself, for the Heavens to punish her like so?
Only after she half-heartedly ate her dinner, tastelessly chewing on a few mouthfuls of rice, did she finally get enough energy to rise from bed.
In the entire Inner Palace, there was apparently only one eunuch that served her, the stately crown prince!! There weren’t even palace maids! Just how terrible was the previous owner of this body?!
Still, Shen Qingmei couldn’t help but feel some amazement. Since she was apparently the His Majesty the Crown Prince, no matter what, with this kind of identity, just how had she been bullied to this extent? No matter how weak the previous body was, no matter how cowardly they were, the emperor had still decided to make her the heir presumptive to the throne!
Waving her hands, she summoned the reluctant-looking eunuch. Shen Qingmei rubbed her temples, feigning a headache.
“Um… where is this place? Who am I??
“Eh…..?!”
Having not expected this kind of question, the eunuch could only stare at her blankly. His mouth fell open in shock.
For the sake of the person in front of her, Shen Qingmei gave a faint smile, hinting towards her meaning.
“Cough… um, I seem to be unable to remember anything.”
Contrary to Shen Qingmei’s expectations, the eunuch did not react in the way that most side-characters did in transmigration stories. He didn’t seem to be surprised, or troubled, or nervous, or try to soothe her panic. Instead, he turned around and left, shouting as he ran:
“There’s trouble! It’s terrible! The Crown Prince has lost his memory! The Crown Prince has lost his memory!”
Shen Qingmei: …
What the fuck!
Tears streamed across her face, falling to the ground in puddles.
A homophone pun: 内牛满面 [nèi niú mǎn miàn], or inner cow whole face, is a corruption of 泪流满面 [lèi liú mǎnmiàn], which means to have tears streaking all across your face.
The eunuch continued to shout, and in a gust of wind had run far away. No matter how many times Shen Qingmei tried to call for him to come back, she was ultimately helpless and could only rely on herself to slowly and tortuously put on a pair of shoes.
She was currently wearing a white top and pants. However, she didn’t know if this was a blessing or a curse. After she had fallen into the water, the person who was forced to change her clothes was that one eunuch. The eunuch was apparently the Crown Prince’s confidant and knew about the Prince’s “transvestite” status long before, which is why he could change her clothes without being shocked.
Thinking of this, Shen Qingmei couldn’t help but bear a silent grudge.
But at the very least… she wasn’t completely alone! Ying, ying…
Ying, ying [嘤嘤] is basically Chinese slang for crying. Used in memes (esp with lolis) to make you feel that the subject is pitiable and thus cute.
Although she already knew what her current body looked like, Shen Qingmei couldn’t help but hold onto a single thread of hope. Slowly, she walked in front of the mirror, where she carefully examined at every inch of her face.
After a few seconds.
Crash!
The entire body weight of the ball collapsed onto the ground.
Your mother, what kind of despair was this?!
This was really too horrible to look at!! No wonder everyone seemed to spurn and avoid her! Before she had carefully examined her appearance, Shen Qingmei had cursed those people for judging her by her appearance. However, seeing her current face, Shen Qingmei felt… she completely understood their actions!
For a person to be this fat was already too much. However, if they were this ugly, short of completely melting down and reconstructing their features, even Korea’s best plastic surgeons wouldn’t be able to save this dumpster fire of a face!
Staring at the person in the mirror, Shen Qingmei’s first thought was: Fuck, this person’s actually a fucking ball!
Her second thought was: It’s not your fault that you were born this ugly, but it’s your fault for scaring people with it!!
Her third thought was: The fuck, this Emperor’s sense of aesthetics is really too off! To choose a Crown Prince that looks like this, aren’t you basically throwing him to the wolves?
Shen Qingmei couldn’t hold back anymore. How come all the other transmigrators got to be beauties or handsome bros? Why was she the only one transmigrated into a giant ball?! So what if the Crown Prince was a prestigious position? Weren’t the Crown Princes being talked about all fucking smart and handsome and rich, so that everyone flocked to them??? If the Crown Prince was a round ball, all they would be was despised!
However, the facts were all arranged in front of her eyes. No matter how much Shen Qingmei protested, no matter how much she screamed, no matter how much she raged, nothing could be changed!
The only thing she could do was become a warrior, gather up her boldness, and face that bloody forest of people in front of her head on…
Tears clouding her vision as she stared at the round sphere in the mirror, Shen Qingmei could only try and console herself. At least she still looked fairly normal. Her eyes, nose, and ears were in the right places, and her skin color appeared to be normal, not black or red or green or a multi-colored rainbow. At least she had all four limbs, not a paraplegic or some three-headed six-armed creature…
But… she was still too fucking fat! You couldn’t deny that she was fat to the point of her face swelling up!
For other transmigrators, their first priorities were to either take advantage of their cheating OP abilities or elevate their status, and make a storm in their new world!
However, for her? Her only plans in the foreseeable future were to lose weight, to lose weight, and to lose weight…
She moped, depressed, on the floor.
It wasn’t until after three days that her first visitor arrived.
“Where is the Crown Prince?”
“His Highness is inside!”
Hearing the sound of footsteps, Shen Qingmei retreated her 45° gaze of suffering towards the Heavens and looked at her new visitor.
“45° angle looking at the Heavens” is a short story/poem by young adult writer Guo Jingming, also known as the most hated male celebrity in China for 3 years in a row. Per usual, Chinese netizens made his angsty writing a meme.
This voice appeared to be the same person that she had heard that day by the lake. So, she deduced, this was probably the same fellow that the original owner was head over heals for. Or, the person that the nuisance of a princess called “Eldest Prince”!
At that time she had been extremely furious, and had only wanted to retaliate against that loathsome girl. Therefore, she had not paid careful attention to anyone else, even the Eldest Prince.
Now that she had transmigrated into this body, she needed to be aware of the circumstances around her. Therefore, she could guess that this Eldest Imperial Brother… wanted to compete with her for the throne?
The shadows near the hallway stirred. Soon, someone walked into the room briskly. The person glanced at the bed, and seeing that there was no occupant, turned his gaze around the room until it fell onto her.
Shen Qingmei was sitting on the ground in a half kneel. She carefully watched him with narrowed eyes.
She had thought that any blood relative of this damn fatty wouldn’t amount to much, but to her surprise found that the man in front of her was extremely handsome!
The temperature outside was extremely chilly, but he wore little.
He was wearing a pair of blue robes with embedded with white edges, without any other kind of decorations or ornaments present. Apart from his cold demeanor, he seemed to to emit a strange kind of non-human aura.
His long black hair was tied over his head neatly with a simple silver hairpin. His blue robes were made of high quality silk, the cut exposing a sliver of his chest. Any hair not tied up was arranged in an orderly fashion over his back, emphasizing his narrow waist.
His facial features seemed to be of the highest quality. His eyes had a deep and unfathomable aspect to them, his nose was straight and high, his lips were thin and cold, and his face was sharp and angled. He reminded her almost of a wolf king from the desolate wasteland, aggressive yet aloof.
Following the light emitting from the window, Shen Qingmei slowly lowered her gaze to appreciate his body. His wide shoulders, his narrow hips, that perfect, flexible pair of buttocks…
Tsk, this really was high quality goods! No wonder that fatty had been willing to throw away her life for him!
Subjected to Shen Qingmei’s lecherous stare, Huangfu Wujie couldn’t help but feel increasingly uneasy. He was about to open his mouth to speak when he was interrupted by the round ball in front of him.
She gave a faint smile as she asked:
“…Who are you?”
