Chapter 03: Immortal Boy and the unknown Killer
It’s been around two weeks since Kirisaki Kyouko and I have become lovers.
Kirisaki had already blended into the class and probably due to her special lady act, she had even become popular with other students. The advantage of putting up a brave front.
As for me, I was the same as ever. The rumour of Kirisaki and me dating already spread throughout the school and a few guys in class teased me about it, but I just glared at them without saying a word and they shut up. The advantaged of not putting up a brave front.
“Now then…”
It was lunch break and I stood up with my lunchbox in hand.
“Node-san!”
Ugg. A soft voice that sounded disgusting and fake to even those who don’t know the truth.
“Let’s eat together.”
As expected, the one who draw closer to me was a demon emitting a sweet fragrance. It was Kirisaki Kyouko.
“Nah, I’m not eating lunch. I’m the type that lives on by eating mist”.
“Again with your jokes, Ufufu.”
“No, for real. I’ll return to mother earth. I belong to the believers of spirits.”
…You hate eating with me that much?”
Kirisaki lowered her look with teary eyes. There it was! The sure-kill crying trap!
“I see. Eating together with someone like me sure is displeasing… Ugh, Ughhh”
Damn schemer. She was just crying meaningless, she was appealing by trying to hold back every single drop of her tears as best as she could. The glances from my classmates hurt.
“…I get it.”
The moment I answered that, suddenly radiated like a blooming flower and with a “Thank you!” she hugged onto me, not caring about those around us. Tumult aroused around us.
“Kirisaki-kun”
“What is it, Node-san?”
“…Stop stabbing me into the back as an extra to the hug.”
“Oh my, what do you mean? I have no clue, fufufufu.”
Like I said, stop twisting it!
“….Your flesh is really fantastic. The perfect sensation of resistance when I stab you is just magnificent…. I got a bit wet.”
I would love to record this obscene words, which were mumbled in a small voice, on tape.
“Hey, Kuon-kun.”
It was then when I heard a sharp voice.
While being hugged (and stabbed) by the rapturous Kirisaki, I looked over there.
Kuon was confronting two female students.
“This isn’t what I ask for.”
One of the girls raised the bread in her hand.
“Mine too. I clearly said orange juice. And this is apple juice.”
The other girl held the juice cartoon in front of Rin, when Rin lowered her head.
“S- Sorry. The orange one was sold out. Same for the bread….”
“Keep it together. At least get a little errand done right.”
“….Yeah, I’m sorry. I know. I’ll be more careful next time.”
“Fine. We’ll count on you then.”
The girl with the juice patted Rin’s head while snickering.
“After all you’re a ‘good girl’, who can’t refuse any favours.”
Rin made a wry smile and nodded slightly.
“Thank you, really. It’s quite convenient.”
While waving around the bread, the other girl laughed.
The two of them left with a “See you~” while laughing shrill.
Rin was waving at them, but when they were out of sight, she became so depressed that you felt sorry for her.
“…Kirisaki, excuse me for a bit.”
“What it is? I want to feel your warmth a bit longer…”
Don’t put your finger into the wound on my back while saying that!
I gave the students, who were looking at us curiously, a glare. Just with that they averted their eyes and scattered into small groups.
The attention on me was gone, so I approached Rin. Kirisaki was following behind me.
“Kuon”
Rin looked my way. Then as always, she smiled like she just had remembered something.
“Ah, Kugi-chan….”
“What’s up?”
“No, nothing. It’s just that I couldn’t buy what Nogi-san and Sakurano-san asked me to buy.”
Nogi and Sakurano were surely the names of the two female students from earlier. I was impressed that she remembered her names, or rather something might be wrong with me, who still hasn’t remember most of my classmate’s names by the end of the second year.
“Did you offer it by yourself to go buy it, Kuon-san?”
When Kirisaki asked that, Rin shook her head.
“They gave me the money and told me to buy it. But I have this small body. I can’t get into the crowed before the store. So I couldn’t fulfil their request. …It’s only obvious that they would get angry.”
“They just pushed that onto you. Are you fine with being used like that?”
Rin made a perplexed look.
“With what?”
“I’m saying that you’re their errand girl. Are you fine with that?”
Tilting her head, Rin said as she didn’t get what I said.
“Why wouldn’t I? Buying it doesn’t take all that much time. Rather, it’s quite distressing not being able to eat what you want. I have to try harder next time.”
“….Now really.”
More than I was angry, I was weary, so I unintentional let out a big sigh.
“You’re just an idiot for being so good-natured.”
“Aw, how mean.”
“But it’s not like they have some special circumstances that don’t allow them to go to the store themselves, right? So I think they should by the things they wants to eat by themselves…”
“Just like she said. I’m not going to say anything about your kindness, but you need to be more careful or you’ll be taken advantage of.”
“Really? I wonder.”
Rin crossed her arms and pondered. But soon enough she said with a smile.
“Well, it’s fine. I helped those two.”
….She’s beyond help. A good girl with muscles for a brain.
I tilted my head with a sigh and told her “Anyway, be more careful. Next time they behave like earlier, call me over” and headed with Kirisaki to the rooftop.
“You’re strangely concerned about that girl.”
Kirisaki said while munching on her crimson sweet bread. The package, which made you wonder if it had wine in it, had written “Entrails Taste” on it with letters in a transpiring horror colour. Just where did she buy that.
“I am?”
I shoved a fried egg of my lunch into my mouth. Today they tasted heavily of salmon flake. Well done if I may say so myself. Delicious.
“Usually you treat others like trash, yet you went to her and gave her some advice. I’m a bit worried.”
“What do you take me….”
“Am I wrong?”
Well, she isn’t exactly wrong.
While putting a pea with peanuts sauce into my mouth, I nodded. It was frustrating how I couldn’t deny that.
“Well, her type is rare these days. She’s a good girl, but too much of that, so she’s being taken advantage of.”
“The age where honest people are seen as idiots, huh. Reminds me, she also changes the water for the flower in the classroom, doesn’t she.”
“Let me add that she also comes early to school to polish everyone’s desk. Most people would think she has some hidden motive. Even I did. But she isn’t that smart to scheme something like that. I came to know that.”
“I see.”
“But no one notices it. They all take it for granted that their desk are clean, the flower gets new water and that there’s no trash laying around. Despite that, they use her as some lackey while knowing that she’s a ‘good girl’. Seeing that just doesn’t suit well with me.”
Kirisaki finished her bread and pulled out a pet bottle filled with some red fluid. I thought it was blood, but it turn out to be simple grape juice. How misleading.
“You like her?”
“Hm?”
“No, I’m sorry. Forget that I asked that.”
Kirisaki took off the cap from the juice. took one gulp and then shook her head.
“You’re free to fall in love or date whoever you want. That was our contract from the beginning.”
Surely she had noticed that she made a displeased face despites her words.
“That’s why I’m not concerned whatever feelings you have for her. Yeah. So you don’t have to concern yourself with it either and just treasure these feelings.”
“Kirisaki”
“Mh? —Hau.”
With my chopsticks I put a meatball into the mouth of Kirisaki, who looked my way. The surprised Kirisaki closed her mouth and chewed for a while, then said a single word.
“…Delicious.”
“Don’t get jealous.”
I smiled faintly and ate my rice with furikake.
“I- I’m not jealous or anything.”
“Rest assured. It’s nothing like love. I’m just kinda envious.”
I looked up to the sky. It had annoying blue colour today again.
“I’m just trash, so she seems just too radiant. Though I don’t believe I can become like her, I believe I should be like her. So I always help her on reflex.”
“…I see.”
“Don’t worry about this trivial stuff. By the way, you haven’t done it lately, have you.”
When I said that, Kirisaki answered “Of course” and ducked her chin.
“After I met you, I made a vow and haven’t it done at all since then.”
“Well, okay then. ….But how many people have you done in so far?”
I asked out of curiosity, when Kirisaki stared into space for a while and then answered “…I don’t remember.”
“There are times when I just can’t hold back myself. My memories is vague for around thirty minutes at these times. I somewhat remember it, but it doesn’t feel real to me. If I had to describe it, it’s like I’m watching myself on a TV. When I came back to my sense, there’s a corpse in front of me.”
So she isn’t doing it with a full consciousness. A creepy story. Kirisaki is killing people unconsciousness and then is confronted with the corpse without any preparation.
“…And I always regret it afterwards. I feel relieved, but a guilty feelings still remains.”
Sounds just like masturbating.
“I hate myself the most at these times. I don’t know how I should handle this feeling. So I force myself to forget about the victim….. I know that’s selfish of me.”
“…Well, I won’t pry too much. But well, I’m surprised you could pull that off all over the country.”
“…About that, there’s something on my mind.”
“Mh?”
“Well, it just might be my imagination. It’s simply a matter of a possibility.”
“Just come out with it.”
When I looked at her questioning, Kirisaki opened her mouth halfway, but closed it immediately again.
“…It’s nothing certain. And it didn’t happen lately, so it’s not really worth talking about.”
“Then don’t bring it up.”
“Right, sorry. …By the way.”
“What?”
“Do you remember my earlier words?”
“Which?”
Kirisaki crumpled up the package of the bread she finished earlier and put it into the pocket of her skirt.
Then she drunk up the grape juice and put it on the ground.
” ‘There are times when I just can’t hold back myself’ ”
Then she pulled up her skirt, allowing me to peek at her well-known bear-patterned panties, and pulled out the knife from her holster. …Hold it. My instincts were telling me with all their might to run away.
“Kugito… Can I?”
Kirisaki’s eyes were directed at me and were clouded by desire. She made an expression like an embarrassed maiden with flushed cheeks.
“Stop. You couldn’t be…”
“I could. That half-assed stab to your back earlier turned on my gears.”
“Hey, wai–”
Kirisaki jumped at me. I was pushed to the ground hopelessly and Kirisaki rode on top of me.
Kirisaki erotically licked her lips and ran her finger along my neck. She whispered to me, who was shivering.
“I’ll have you… take responsibility.”
Then I was attacked. Quite literally.
The horny stabbing demon called Kirisaki Kyouko stabbed me around 16 times and in the end petted my wounds. It was an experience not even a maniac suffered and seeing as I was no M, it was merely a adversity to me. I felt like taking a shower while crying.
Nevertheless, I forgave her and after school I parted with the strangely satisfied Kirisaki and quietly went home by myself. I realized how generous I was.
She took off my uniform beforehand, so I avoided the tragedy of having it riddled, but the countless wounds on my body were covered with scurf and hadn’t healed completely yet, so I would surely have a hard time when I took a bath.
Thinking of how I had to stick with her from now on, made me quite soulful, but I stayed optimistic and thought that I would get used to it in time. Guess it’s the influence from my sister that I can adapt my thoughts so easily. Then I suddenly remember that it was the end of the week and I immediately was filled with excitement about the holiday from tomorrow on. I would prefer that you don’t call me simple, but blessed with the ability to adapt to situations.
Encouraging myself like that, I turned the knob and opened the door…..Oh? It wasn’t locked.
When I looked around the entrance hall, I found laying my sister’s things and shoes scattered around.
I tidied up her stuff, took off my own shoes and entered the house.
I could hear the sound of the TV from the living room.
“Sis, you’re home?”
I opened the curtain while asking, when I saw my sister eating a deluxe Sukiyaki lunch box while watching TV.
“Welham hom.”
“You’re eating that again. You need to eat vegetables too or your bones will turn frail.”
“It’s convenient how meat immediately gives you power. You’re home early.”
“I have nothing to do once class ends after all.”
“How sad. When I was in high school, I was more….”
“More what?”
“…Reminds me, you were doing three part-time jobs for living expenses, right? Such a gloomy youth.”
“Thanks for your concern.”
“You’re welcome. Don’t you have a girlfriend? You’re at that age. Go on a date after school or so. I’ll be sure to trail you.”
“First time I see someone announce the trailing beforehand. And I don’t have a girlfriend.”
It’s better I don’t mention that I’m being chased by some weird girl. For own sake. And for the standpoint of my sister.
“You’re home early too, Sis. What’s up?”
“Ah, I slipped away for a bit. I’ll go back once I finished eating this.”
“I see.”
I took the black tea from my sister and gulped it down.
“Ah, watch was that for!”
“You keep getting fatter since you only drink sweet stuff like this.”
“I- I’m not getting fat!”
“Right, you’re just plump.”
“Yep, yep, I’m popular for my cute round face.”
“That’s just a roundabout way to say you have chubby cheeks.”
A carrot with sauce came flying at me. How clever of her to throw the stuff at me that she hates.
“…Onto the next news.”
Then the announcer spoke with a stiff tone while looking at his script.
“Another of these incidents.”
I simple looked at the screen. And then I was horrified.
“Today in the early morning a man, who had collapsed on the street, was found by a woman on her way to work in **City ** District. The man’s body was cut with something sharp like a knife and the man was already dead. His chest was covered with a big cross-shaped wound, so the police investigates particularly with regards to the serial killer incidents that happened all over the country. …We’ll now connect to your correspondent on the scene. Nonaka-san?”
The image changed and showed an unfamiliar three-way street. In the centre stood a man with a microphone. Behind him stood a couple of patrol cars and a few people were running around.
“Yes, Nonaka here. Right now the police is still investigating the scene. About three weeks had passed since the last incident without anything happening at all, so the incident was thought to stay unsettled, but this recurrence has raised the tension within the police force.”
“This came out of nowhere. Headquarters will be a chaos again. Since they’re all impatient.”
My sister started grumbling with an annoyed tone. But my situation was far from that.
“…Sis, I’m going out for a bit.”
“Where to? You only just came home.”
“I have to go!”
I stood up full of go and started heading for the entrance hall. I knew where I had to go.
“Now she has done…!”
I was a fool for trusting her. Now that I thought about it, there was no proof for what she said. If she lied in order to keep me in check, then I was truly a fool for not doubting her in the least.
When I put on my shoes irritated, I spotted Bearzawa-kun. Since I was somehow pissed, I punched him. Bearzawa-kun flew through the air and fell on the floor while still maintaining his smile. “Yo, good evening. When the moon is out, I feel like dancing!” Then how about I let you dance to your death!
“Damn!”
This wasn’t the time to vent my anger on a stuffed animal. I got ready to leave and was about to spring out.
At that moment.
The chime rang.
“Mh? A visitor?”
My sister came to check. She passed by me and asked through the door.
“Who is there?”
The person on the other said answered in a weak voice.
“U- Umm, I—”
All strength left my body, like when the strings were cut from a marionette. What a good timing. No, actually it was bad timing.
“My name is Kirisaki Kyouko and I’m currently in a relationship with Node-san… Is Node-san at home….?”
My sister looked at me.
Her ‘now you have done it’ face pissed me off quite a bit.
“Oh my, I’m sorry that I don’t have anything prepared. Just take your time! Do you want some juice? Kugito, we still had some snacks, didn’t we? Like some chocolate. Aw geez, I’m a bit careless, so I don’t know where stuff is in the house. I’m sorry.”
My sister said so smiling, when Kirisaki somewhat shyly responded to the hospitality.
“No, not all… I apologize for coming over so suddenly. There was something I wanted to discuss with Node-san….”
Since Kirisaki had said all that with flushed cheeks, my sister was quite excited, put her hands together and shouted.
“So~ cute~!”
She hugged her from behind and rubbed her cheeks against hers. That…. That wasn’t my sister.
“How cold of you, Kugito. Why didn’t you tell me that you had such a cute girl besides you.”
“No, she isn’t really my girlfriend or anything.”
“You don’t need to be embarrassed. Or did you thought I would worry when I knew you had a girlfriend? Oh please, I’m not that overprotective. Rather I’m worried about that drawn back character of yours. Even as a high schooler, you didn’t find a single girl and always made a stupid spaced out face like a dog in the summer heat. But you still had it in you after all.”
I felt like she insulted me continuously without a care, but whatever. That didn’t matter now.
“Like I told you, Sis, she’s…”
“Hey, Kirisaki-san, what do you like about Kugito? While he’s my little brother, he still doesn’t seem to be the type to be popular with the girls.”
“Ah, ehm….His gently side….”
“Kyaa! So love-struck!”
Listen to me, even if it’s just for five minutes!
“Sis… Leave us alone and go back to work. You just slipped away, right?”
“Eh? Ah, right. Damn. It just got so interesting.”
My sister sighed when she looked at the clock. Then she faced Kirisaki and told her “Okay, Kirisaki-san, just feel at home here. I mean it. I’ll be home late. So you can try a couple of stuff, you know. How should I call it, the mistakes of youth? Anyway, everything’s allowed! That guy is a virgin, so he probably sucks at it, so you have to do something about it yourself!” with a hand on her shoulder.
“Just get out of here, you pervert.”
“So mean! … I get it already!”
While puffing up her cheeks, my sister somewhat happy left for the second floor with dance steps. Soon enough she came down wearing a suit and left with a “See you” while waving her hand.
Kirisaki saw her off with a smile and the moment the door closed, she was back to her usual boldness.
“What an interesting sister.”
“…Don’t speak about my sister right now.”
I pressed my hand against my forehead and sighed. “So…” I looked down to Kirisaki, who sat on a chair.
“Let’s start by how you knew where I live.”
“To make it short and precise, I asked Kuon Rin.”
Is that so. Well, I somehow expected that.
“Then, that aside. …There’s another thing I want to ask you.”
“I know.”
Kirisaki said.
“…It’s about what was in the news, right?”
“Yeah. …You lied to me, didn’t you? Have you forgotten already why I put up with your eccentricity? Or did you do it knowingly? Either way, you’re the worst.”
Breathing out. Kirisaki shook her head and looked up to me.
“It wasn’t me.”
“Huh?”
“I came here to tell you that.”
“…What do you mean?”
I sat down on a chair and looked straight at Kirisaki. She likewise looked straight into my eyes.
“Just what I have said.”
She specified.
“The incident reported in the news wasn’t done by me.”
“What?”
“Everything I told you was the truth. As long as I have you, there’s no need for me to become the <Midnight killing Devil>. Therefore I haven’t killed a single person since I met you.”
“….I hope that’s true.”
“If you don’t believe me, we can’t proceed our conversation. If you insist on doubting me, then we’re done here.”
I crossed my arms and looked Kirisaki into the eyes. She lightly nodded. Sadly I wasn’t that experience to tell if was lying just by looking her into the eyes. But at least Kirisaki didn’t avert her gaze even by a millimetre.
“…Okay.”
I decided to trust her for now.
“Thanks.”
Kirisaki gave a small smile.
“So, what’s going on.”
Kirisaki uttered a “Mhm”, then kept quiet for a bit. Then she murmured softly.
“My guess is— Someone is imitating my crime.”
“A copycat criminal?”
“Probably. …Do you have a computer?”
“Nah, we can’t afford to buy something that expensive.”
Kirisaki nodded in comprehension and stood up.
“Then let’s go to my room. ….I have some clues.”
In the room that was as plain as before, Kirisaki served me some tea, opened the lid of her notebook and turned it on.
Meanwhile I idly drank my tea and looked around the room. The last time I was here I hadn’t noticed it, but there was a book shelf packed with manga, novels and pocketbooks.
“You like to read?”
“Yeah, specially manga.”
“What’s your favourite?”
“Doraemon.”
I involuntarily spouted my tea. This answer was so different from her character.
“What’s up?”
“No… I only had expected something more bloody.”
“Can you proudly admit that your favourite book is a porn book? Liking and desire are two different things.”
I see. “But still, Doraamon?”
“It’s a good manga. It shows you that the future is limitless. It makes living enjoyable.”
“Guess you can look at it like that. By the way, which character do you like?”
“Suneo.”
“Yet another weird pick.”
“Nobita is a coward that clads himself with in good-nature. Shizuka is unrealistic. Gian is disappointing and only becomes a good guy in the movie, which is hypocrisy, so I hate him. Suneo appears the most realistic.”
“I like Nobita though. I sympathize with him, since he’s aware of his own stupidity and laziness, yet is ready to risk is life.”
“A typical answer from you.”
Kirisaki said amused and moved the mouse. This might have been the very first time I had such a normal conversation with her.
“Look here.”
She turned the notebook so that I could look at it too. We were both peeking at it. The screen showed a black background with white gothic letters that said <Alice Tea Party>.
“What’s this?”
“A private website on the internet… A so called homepage.”
“Well, I see that much….Alice Tea Party? Is it Alice from Wonderland?”
“Yeah.”
She clicked on the enter button below the site’s name, when the site asked for a password. Quite the security for a personal website. A membership system, huh.
“To tell the truth, this is an underground site. Average people can’t access it.”
“Underground?”
“It means under the surface. Only those who cleared a certain condition, will get a mail from the admin with a password.”
In no time the top page appeared. The background was still black and it the middle was a teapot, which had a malicious skull mark. How vulgar. Below it was written:
<Congratulations to you, who spent a boring life>
There were little contents. Only a BBS, a chat and an admin contact form.
“What’s this site for?”
“It’s mainly a site for people, who have a liking for crimes, to talk about their feelings, which they usually can’t express.”
Geh.
“And there’s something particular about these people. It’s rumoured that 90% of all the grotesque crimes around world are committed by people who access this site.”
“…Isn’t that a problem?”
“That what makes it interesting.”
Kirisaki clicked accustomed on the BBS. A common tree BBS popped up. While we had no computer at home, I knew at least these technical terms from just now, because we have a computer class at school. That’s how it was. I had no idea though who I was explaining myself to.
“On the other hand, they say even the police is on this site, since it’s gives a good opportunity to cope with crimes. Well, it’s all a rumour at best.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, look here.”
Saying that, Kirisaki clicked a random thread title.
There the thread starter, who called herself a housewife in the 30s, was talking about her abnormal liking. Apparently she couldn’t climax during sex when she didn’t see the blood-shot face of her partner, so she ended up strangling her sex partners to death. Then understanding people suggested that she should only strangle them to the utmost limit without killing them. On a different thread a guy, who had the fetish of changing out his own eyeballs with that of someone else, was endlessly going on about who had the best eyeballs so far. When I looked at the replies, there was someone suggesting to try out cutting off the own fingers and sew back on the fingers from a woman. Furthermore, there was a guy, who considered a bag made of human skin cooler and manlier than any brand one, since it was easier to use, speaking with someone, who was doing the same, and considering if they should meet up and exchange their stuff.
“….I feel sick just by reading this.”
I massaged my temples and averted my eyes from the screen. It really wasn’t something to look at steadfast.
“Wouldn’t get such a site get taken down immediately? Announcing crimes on the internet is a hot topic these days, isn’t it?”
“First off, the admin of the site never shows his face. Second, a direct access to the site is nearly impossible. <Alice Tea Party> doesn’t use a provider, but is set up on a private server. It’s hard to determine it’s owner.”
“But what if someone of the participants goes to report it to the police?”
“Happened already a few times. It was even once shut down by the warning of the police. But not long after it was rebooted on a new server. It’s a vicious circle. Besides.”
“Beside?”
“As I told you earlier, there’s a rumour that the police takes no decisive steps, since it’s a good opportunity to cope with the crimes instead.”
“Yeah. …Though to me it only looks like the site is promoting crimes.”
“That’s were you’re wrong. Gakuto, do you know the absolute flaw of the convenient tool called the internet?”
“…That you can’t see the other party’s face?”
“A clichéd answer, but yes. No matter how much one makes himself a good person on the internet, as long as you don’t deal with him personally, it will always stay an illusion created by words. There’s a good chance that the guy, who boast that he got a new girl every day, graduated from Toudai and is a qualified lawyers, is actually a 30 years old fat otaku NEET that didn’t leave his house for 10 years.”
“Right.”
“Why do you think people create fake identities on the internet?”
“Well, because it’s feels better. Rather than admitting to one’s own boring self, it’s more fun to spent time by pretending to be someone really great. After all, you won’t get into a close relationship with those you meet on the internet anyway.”
“Yeah. And the feeling of liberation by putting on a mask lets people be more forthright. On the internet, a docile person nonchalant insults someone else or merciless flames, discounting his own weak self that stands in contrast to the fictional work of movies, manga or novels. That all comes from the release of the drive that was being restrained within us. <I’m not like that>, <I’m better than this>, <That guy gets acknowledged while I’m being excoriated. That’s not right.>. We usually can’t easily voice such thoughts. But on the internet, where we are all isolated and separated from each other, we can voice them out freely. One can show his true nature or act out a personality as much as he wants.”
“So what?”
“These two might appear different, but they share a common basis.”
“Just tell me your conclusion already.”
“Don’t rush me. I meant that either of them relieves you from your daily stress, discontent and grumbling. The joy of having others believe your fake personality and the pleasure of being able to release plenty of one’s self, which can’t be shown to others. Most of the people feel better with that and return to the reality that only restrains themselves. Well, though sometimes there are people who ignore that and just devote themselves to their internet self.
Anyway, try to imagine what would happen to these people if they hadn’t had the internet.”
“…Well, not everyone, but surely some of them would overload on the stress and snap.”
“Exactly.”
Kirisaki looked at me with a face that said ‘Now you understand’. As opposed as I was, I had no choice but to admit to that.
In short it was like this: These abnormal and perverse crimes that were described on the board, weren’t necessarily all conducted in real life. There was a possibility that people, who wanted to do these actions, but couldn’t accomplish them in the end, just acted out their <self who did that> on this site and thus gained a temporary satisfaction. Before they knew it, these people would be in a world where they <accomplished their actions without actually doing them> and their desire to accomplish the crimes in real life would disappear. Certainly, in that way <Alice Tea Party> might cope with crimes.
“There you have it. But it’s just a floating rumour, so nothing certain.”
“…I understand. So, you’re a regular on this site?”
“I wrote a couple of times on the board. I tried to make a list of my crimes.”
“Why would you do that.”
“…..I had hoped the drive inside me would be satisfied with that. But it was no use. It seems my drive can’t be answered by this fake kind of satisfaction.”
Well, if desire could be answered by the mere thought of “I had sex”, then mankind would have gone extinct long ago.
“Still, the contents of this site were quite interesting, so I checked them on a daily basis. That’s when I found a slightly disturbing post.”
Kirisaki typed <March Hare> into the board’s search function and pushed the enter-key.
“By the way, why is the site called <Alice Tea Party>? I only saw the anime of Alive in Wonderland, but it was far from the grotesque stuff here.”
“In Lewis Carroll’s <Alice in Wonderland>, the heroine Alice attends a strange tea party held by strange characters by chance.”
A lot of results appeared on the screen. Kirisaki clicked the scroll bar and scrolled down.
Then she stopped at a certain result and clicked the button to show the entire thread.
“Carroll calls it a <Mad Tea Party>.”
…I see. That certainly fit this site.
“Now there is someone with the nickname <March Hare>, which is a character of that tea party.”
The thread title was <Midnight killing Devil>.
The contents were about the recent serial killer that left behind a cross-shaped wound. The abnormality of repeating the crimes all over the country and the merciless way of killing received high valuation. It worried me how Kirisaki was called a <god> frequently.
A confident post from someone that seemed to have an acquaintance with the police. stated that the crime was committed precisely at midnight.
“Is that true?”
I asked the criminal herself. Kirisaki slightly shook her head.
“It’s not. Certainly, I killed during the night to avoid detection, but it wasn’t precisely at midnight. Besides, it was a complete different time when I killed you too, wasn’t it.”
Now that she mentioned it. Back then, I thought it was strange.
“I guess this thread got leaked somewhere, which resulted in that nickname. I had no intention at all to grace myself with it. There’s obviously no need to commit a murder at midnight when there’s no merit to it.”
“But the thread stated <Our god embeds a high grade of art in the crime. The cross-shaped wound and the midnight time are for that very reason.>”
“Kugito, only characters of a manga or some bad kid with no brains would embed art into a murder. I never believed that my actions were the least bit magnificent. Well, in any case a crime should be nasty. Don’t you agree?”
Of course I had no intention to agree to that. But
“Then why did you inflict a cross-shaped wound?”
“Just a habit.”
….Is that so. She, who gave off an aura of “The cross-shape wound represents Jesus’s crucifixion itself. It’s proof of lamenting over the fact that I myself are an existence that’s capable of probing the filthy humans and that the crimes are god’s iron hammer.”, suddenly looked pitiful to me.
Scrolling further down, there was another reply by <March Hare>. Guess he must have hit the word limit, as it seemed to continue from where the previous post left off.
This time though he was talking about his discontent about the <Midnight killing Demon>. He pointed out the flaws, like the wild way of killing, the naivety in disposing the corpse or the use of a specific weapon. He ended his post with the words “I could do a better job”. Previous to that, not many replies had <Midnight killing Devil> in it, so the sudden rise in Kirisaki’s popularity was eye-catching. Kirisaki must have felt the same as she looked into my eyes and nodded lightly.
“Giving information only you know to show off that you understand the person the best and when everyone’s attention is caught and they start praising, you switch over to the opposition. A typical example of a critic with a strong need for admiration. It’s not just the <March Hare>, there are a lot of people like that on the internet.”
“How selfish. I guess if you take guys like that serious, they’ll only get more arrogant.”
“Well, to begin with it wasn’t done to get people to complain. I ignored him at first too. But.”
She clicked on the next page. Again March Hare’s name was there. He wrote the following:
“Lately, the crimes of our God, the <Midnight killing Devil>, are too artless. The initial beauty and philosophy are gone.”
Thinking that he was about the only one, who wanted to see some art or philosophy in the crimes, I read on how March Hare continued.
“Our God might be dead. As sad as it is, we no longer can do anything about it. But, we cannot let our God’s glorious deeds go to waste. We need someone to succeed our God.”
What…? How inappropriate.
Guess I wasn’t the only one to think that, as there followed replies asking about the meaning of March Hare’s word. That prolonged the thread abnormally, before he answered again.
“Of course people would be curious about my words. It’s only the beginning now. Look forward to it. Over.”
“Not that I really care, but he sounded quite arrogant. I thought one needed to be even more mannered on the internet than in real life.”
“He’s the type that thinks that arrogance proves his own high standing. Don’t take it to mind. When I read this thread, I tried sending him a mail. I was curious to what he was up to.”
“But there was no reply?”
“You’re quick on the uptake.”
“Guess that’s the ‘something on your mind’ that you mentioned on the rooftop. Even I have some brain cells I can use. I figured it out mostly. You didn’t get a reply to your mail. Then there were no more replies to this post. You had no more clues, so you gave up. But then.”
“Yeah.”
Kirisaki nodded on my words.
“After that I saw the news reporting a crime of the <cross-slashing Devil>, which I had no memory of.”
“…How many of these hot-topic crimes were your doing?”
“A third—Or maybe even less. Even I can’t make it as far as Akita or Kyushu.”
“That means, the crimes there were done by March Hare—”
“–in my stead. Yes, that’s a possibility.”
Kirisaki sighed.
“…I have no proof if he has done it, so I didn’t say anything. And it strangely calmed down lately. But now it came back.”
“…I see. So, what are you going to about it?”
“About what?”
Kirisaki made a perplexed expression. I pointed to the screen while saying with a accusing tone.
“Your killing spree is what caused such a nutcase to appear. How are you going to take responsibility for it.”
“Even if you ask that.”
Kirisaki put her elbow on the desk and rested her cheek on it and she waved her other free hand flittering besides her head.
“Assuming that we’re going to punish him somehow, just what do you expect me to do when I don’t know his name, address or even face?”
Well, she had a point..
“So we can’t do anything even though we know what a dangerous nutcase he is, huh.”
“The dilemma of the internet.”
“Is our only choice is to leave him be…?”
“Going by the facts, yes….But, people are murdered by a guy that pretends to be me. Simply sitting idle and watching that isn’t my style.”
“But there’s nothing we can do, is there?”
“Guess so… I would like to compile the information and any witness’s report on this site to get some kind of solution, but I don’t know how effective that will be.”
Kirisaki puckered her lips displeased. Guess she didn’t like how we currently weren’t even on the tail of the criminal that was mimicking her. Despite being a serial killer, Kirisaki was just a simple female high school student. When she didn’t have an investigation power like the police, there was no way she had any original connections.
“…Is there nothing I can do?”
Kirisaki looked my way with her almond eyes.
“That’s a surprising statement from you. Usually you only care for yourself.”
“What do you take me for? Even I have an average sense of justice.”
“…That’s really hard to believe.”
What a coincidence. For me too.
“….Well, jokes asides. Just telling you to give your best and going home wouldn’t suit well with me.”
“I see. Now that half-assed attitude is more like you.”
Was she making fun of me?
Kirisaki said while closing the site.
“Then there’s one thing I would like you to do.”
“What is it?”
“Forget it.”
She turned off the notebook.
“Forget all about it and go back to your normal life. Me aside, this doesn’t concern you at all. I doubt the copy-cat killer will came as far as to this city.”
“…But.”
“What? Do you have some decisive hint for identifying the culprit?”
“No, no such thing.”
“I know it’s a mean to say this, but then there is nothing you can do. At any rate, this is my own problem.”
I kept quiet. While I was opposed to it, Kirisaki was certainly right. There was nothing I could do. I hated my own incapability a bit.
However—-there was something bothering me.
“… May I speak?”
“What is it?”
“Well, who do you think was it that throughout smashed that so called “normal life” with a hammer to oblivion?”
“Fate…Yeah, an existence above the clouds…”
“It was you!”
“How rude. All I did was stabbing you!”
“To hell with you ‘all I did’! In which world would you find a crazy guy that answers ‘Geez, you’re so helpless. It’s no big deal, so I’ll forgive you.’?”
“….”
“Point the finger at yourself before you point it at me.”
“You mean, in the end I’m the only one to forgive myself? I see, I get it. I’ll forgive myself! Okay, Kugito, today it’ll be the innards. Stick out your stomach.”
I slapped her without mercy on the cheek.
“Ow! Domestic Violence!”
From who! Actually, it means something else!
“….Somehow I’m tired. I’m going home.”
I stood up while pressing my temples.
“Yeah, that’s good. That’s better for your psyche rather than to waste time by bemoaning your futility.”
“You…”
Could it be she was considerate towards—
“…can’t be. So stupid. I’m going home.”
“It saddens me that you weren’t struck in surprise there.”
“Maybe not by surprise, but I’m sure you’ll strike me.”
I brought the stupid conversation to and end and went on my way home.
My head was filled with the peaceful thought of how I’m going to explain the situation with Kirisaki to my sister.
Now that I thought about it, Kirisaki’s words made perfect sense.
The copy-cat killer that repeats crimes as a fake <Midnight killing Devil>. He’s not an existence to be ignored, but there’s nothing I can do about it. Sure, I’m immortal and better at fighting than the average guy, but that’s all. Not only didn’t I have the strength to pull of the stunt of catching the criminal that’s roils Japan, I didn’t even have the brains for it. Like always, I noticed how useless I am.
Well, whatever. Like Kirisaki said, that all didn’t concern me. The possibility that the country-wide operating criminal will show up in this small city by chance is zero. I’ll follow her order and forget about it. Japan police, give it your all in catching this nutcase. I’ll hold down the other one.
The sun was already going down. The people and buildings were coloured red. While holding in a yawn, I was walking sloppy towards my house. When.
“Huh, Kugi-chan.”
I heard a familiar voice and turned around. Kuon Rin in her uniform was waving her hand.
“Yo. On your way home? Quite late.”
“Yeah. I was cleaning the square and later was asked by the teacher to do a couple of things, so before I noticed, it got so late.”
Rin draw closer with small steps and slapped my back.
“You’re out quite late too, Kugi-chan.”
“I’m a delinquent, so this is just perfect.”
“Even a delinquent might go straight home after school.”
“What’s the point of being a delinquent then?”
Also, didn’t she just consent to me being a delinquent?
“Then you’re a honour student, Kugi-chan?”
“If I’m a honour student, then what are you? A goddess?”
“Worship me!”
I ruffled her head.
“Gya! My hair! What chat for!”
“Sorry. That’s how our religion worships our gods.”
I lightly laughed when Rin angrily puffed her cheeks.
“Hey, want to walk together?”
“No need to specially ask that. Aren’t we walking together already?”
“Ah, right.”
“But you sure are a rare kind.”
When I scratched my head and said that, Rin looked perplexed.
“Why?”
“Well, I always wanted to tell you. Nothing good will happen to you if you stick together with a guy like me. Quite the contrary, lately a rumour is going around saying you’re my underling. Did you know?”
“No way.”
“Yes way.”
“Your underling, huh…Then I need to add ‘yo man’ at the end of every sentence.”
What age did she live in?
“Well, it’s fine. After all I’m doing as I please.”
“Well, yeah…”
I walked besides Rin on the dusk-coloured road.
I had nothing special to talk about, so I kept quiet, but when Rin asked me something, I answered back accordingly.
I thought about what Kirisaki would say if she saw us like this, then wondered why I would even think of her now. That monologue pained me.
“…What’s wrong?”
“Nah, nothing. I was only pondering who it was that said that a random coincidence was an inevitability.”
And that I would like to smack that person while denying these words. I wouldn’t accept that this outcome was predestined. It was all due to my bad luck.
“? I don’t really get it. You say some difficult stuff, Kugi-chan.”
“Yeah. You on the other hand only say some easy stuff. I want to learn from you.”
“…Was that a bit of sarcasm?”
That she noticed it was impressive alone.
But when I thought about it, Rin really did only talk about average stuff. About what she watched on TV yesterday, about the delicious cake she ate recently, about the interesting new game, about a touching movie, etc, etc.
That’s the common sense I want to teach the witch that endless goes on about the sensation of cutting through flesh and it’s accompanying emotion or the difference in the absolute charm between flowing blood and paint.
“That’s what a young female high school girl is about. But it’s not like you’re doing good deeds all day, right.”
“Well, of course. I’m a girl after all. I’m interested in fashion like any other, I want to keep a cute pet and…”
“And?”
“…even fell in love.”
“Hee. That’s a first. I’m curious what your type of man is.”
“I won’t tell you. I gave up anyway.”
“Why?”
“There was no hope for me.”
“That’s not like you. You’re always so annoying energetic around me.”
“….Idiot.”
She called me an idiot. I wasn’t sure how I should take this out of context insult. I guess I should get angry for now?
“Hmpf, just go ahead.”
What was she getting angry for.
Rin puckered her lips, went ahead and suddenly said “Ah”.
“What’s up.”
Before us was a crosswalk and a child was waiting alone at the traffic light. I wondered where her mother was, when I spotted her on the other side of the street waving her hand. The child must have not been able to keep up with the mother.
“Excuse me for second.”
Rin approached the child with small steps and said something. The child was hesitating a bit, but when Rin smiled and put out her hand, it shyly grabbed it.
In time, the traffic light changed to green and Rin crossed the crosswalk together with the kid. I followed behind them.
Rin matched her steps completely to the child’s one. A feast impossible to me. It was a drowsy slow pace, but for some reason I didn’t find it annoying.
When we arrived on the other said, the mother thanked her, but Rin only answer “No problem”. Then she squatted, patted the child on the head and said “See you”. The child nodded and said “Bye, bye” while waving it’s hand, then left together with it’s mother.
“Okay, let us get going too.”
Rin didn’t boast about her natural conducted good deed, made a face like she only did what she had to do and faced towards me.
I looked down a bit. Then we resumed our walk together.
“Hey.”
I called from behind Rin.
“What?”
“…Why are you like that?”
“Mh?”
Rin turned around without stopping.
“Like what?”
“Well, like…”
I scratched my head.
“How should I say. Doing things that don’t get you anything every day. It’s not like you gain anythign by it. I couldn’t do that.”
“It’s not like I’m doing it because I want something in return.”
That I knew.
“Mhm. ….What can I say.”
Rin faced forwards and looked up to the sky.
“When I leave troubled people alone, my chest gets this funny restless feeling. Like it’s saying that I didn’t do anything, even though there was supposed to be something I could have done. And there is no guarantee that someone is going to do something about that restless feeling of mine later on. So I think it’s better to make a move, so that I don’t get that feeling to begin with.”
….I see.
“….Besides, you can do it too, Kugi-chan.”
“Me? What?”
“You’re pretty considerate to me in various ways. Even today.”
“No, well…”
But that was only because it was you. I wouldn’t care for anyone that I don’t know.
“It doesn’t change the fact that you helped me. Everyone’s like that. They want to help their important person. Want to do something for it. Isn’t that so?”
“Well, yeah….”
“I don’t mean to brag, but I have a lot of that <important person>.”
Rin said with a smile.
“That’s all to it, I think.”
“….You’re amazing.”
There’s too much of a difference between us. Don’t tell me you also seriously wish for world peace?
“I do, something wrong with that?”
“No, nothing wrong with that.”
I shook my head.
“So you don’t think that you’re getting the short end of the stick? There aren’t that many who repay kindness with kindness. Like these girls today.”
“That’s not true. Though things like today do happen sometimes…. When I do the greening campaign on Sunday or when I help out at the nursing home, I’m often told ‘Thank you’. Don’t you think that’s a precious gain? I mean, it doesn’t happen all so often that you get thanked every day.
But whenever you’re kind to someone, the occurrence increases by one. So I don’t think I’m getting the short end of the stick at all.”
What to say, you’re second to none.
“You’re even kind to a worthless guy like me.”
“You’re not worthless!”
She replied with a rather serious tone to my casually said words. I stopped unintentional.
“…I tell you I am.”
There wasn’t anyone as worthless as me.
“That’s not true. Everyone is needed by someone, just by being alive.”
Thanks. But you can only say that since you’re happy.
“Then, why aren’t you allowed to be happy, Kugi-chan?”
Because the condition doesn’t apply to me. Since it’s not certain if I’m <alive>.
“….I don’t get what you’re saying.”
Rin crossed her arms and tilted her head lost in thought.
“But that’s not good at all.”
“What is?”
“To presume by yourself that you’re unwanted. That’s rude to the people who think that you’re needed.”
“There isn’t anyone like that.”
“There is.”
“Is not.”
“IS!”
You’re quite persistent on that.
“You don’t get it, Kugi-chan…. Don’t you remember it?”
“What?”
“You saved me during the freshman year when I was bullied by the boys.”
….Doesn’t ring a bell.
“For you it might have been something trivial, but for me it was something to be really thankful of….Since I was small, I tried to be kind, but was hated instead and bullied a lot. At these times I thought I should just stop being kind. But then you saved me and when I told you the reason for the bullying you simply said:”
Rin looked me into the face and said.
“You’re an idiot.”
I was such an ass.
“…But you also said that I’m great and respect worthy. I was really happy. It was the first time someone acknowledged the things I had done.”
That I didn’t remember that made me even more of an ass. I should at least remember what I said myself!
“As you see, you can’t decided by yourself what others think of you.”
Rin draw closer and grabbed my hand.
“So, never think that you’re worthless.”
I didn’t answer. Rin said.
“I’m sure even Kirisaki would find it sad.”
“…I wonder.”
“Besides, I also think it’s sad.”
Rin turned around and started to walk.
“Makes it look like it even denies my feelings of l….”
I couldn’t hear what you said well. Say it once more.
“….Hmpf. See you!”
Rin walked away without looking back.
“Ugh!
Immediately after she tripped. Ohh, her panties were in plain view. White-blue striped panties. Nice. Wait, it wasn’t the time for that.
“…Are you okay?”
I was going to give her a hand, but Rin stood up by herself while saying “I… I’m okay”.
“Th- Then, see you!”
Then somewhat hurried, she once again walked away.
“…What an oddball.”
I pondered while I watched Rin’s back with a wry smile.
—Then, why aren’t you allowed to be happy, Kugi-chan?
One has to shoulder an equivalent risk when straying from the path.
I recalled Kirisaki’s words.
Happiness.
I’m sure the risk I’m shouldering in order to live is that I don’t have it.
Chapter 03: Immortal Boy and the unknown Killer
It’s been around two weeks since Kirisaki Kyouko and I have become lovers.
Kirisaki had already blended into the class and probably due to her special lady act, she had even become popular with other students. The advantage of putting up a brave front.
As for me, I was the same as ever. The rumour of Kirisaki and me dating already spread throughout the school and a few guys in class teased me about it, but I just glared at them without saying a word and they shut up. The advantaged of not putting up a brave front.
“Now then…”
It was lunch break and I stood up with my lunchbox in hand.
“Node-san!”
Ugg. A soft voice that sounded disgusting and fake to even those who don’t know the truth.
“Let’s eat together.”
As expected, the one who draw closer to me was a demon emitting a sweet fragrance. It was Kirisaki Kyouko.
“Nah, I’m not eating lunch. I’m the type that lives on by eating mist”.
“Again with your jokes, Ufufu.”
“No, for real. I’ll return to mother earth. I belong to the believers of spirits.”
…You hate eating with me that much?”
Kirisaki lowered her look with teary eyes. There it was! The sure-kill crying trap!
“I see. Eating together with someone like me sure is displeasing… Ugh, Ughhh”
Damn schemer. She was just crying meaningless, she was appealing by trying to hold back every single drop of her tears as best as she could. The glances from my classmates hurt.
“…I get it.”
The moment I answered that, suddenly radiated like a blooming flower and with a “Thank you!” she hugged onto me, not caring about those around us. Tumult aroused around us.
“Kirisaki-kun”
“What is it, Node-san?”
“…Stop stabbing me into the back as an extra to the hug.”
“Oh my, what do you mean? I have no clue, fufufufu.”
Like I said, stop twisting it!
“….Your flesh is really fantastic. The perfect sensation of resistance when I stab you is just magnificent…. I got a bit wet.”
I would love to record this obscene words, which were mumbled in a small voice, on tape.
“Hey, Kuon-kun.”
It was then when I heard a sharp voice.
While being hugged (and stabbed) by the rapturous Kirisaki, I looked over there.
Kuon was confronting two female students.
“This isn’t what I ask for.”
One of the girls raised the bread in her hand.
“Mine too. I clearly said orange juice. And this is apple juice.”
The other girl held the juice cartoon in front of Rin, when Rin lowered her head.
“S- Sorry. The orange one was sold out. Same for the bread….”
“Keep it together. At least get a little errand done right.”
“….Yeah, I’m sorry. I know. I’ll be more careful next time.”
“Fine. We’ll count on you then.”
The girl with the juice patted Rin’s head while snickering.
“After all you’re a ‘good girl’, who can’t refuse any favours.”
Rin made a wry smile and nodded slightly.
“Thank you, really. It’s quite convenient.”
While waving around the bread, the other girl laughed.
The two of them left with a “See you~” while laughing shrill.
Rin was waving at them, but when they were out of sight, she became so depressed that you felt sorry for her.
“…Kirisaki, excuse me for a bit.”
“What it is? I want to feel your warmth a bit longer…”
Don’t put your finger into the wound on my back while saying that!
I gave the students, who were looking at us curiously, a glare. Just with that they averted their eyes and scattered into small groups.
The attention on me was gone, so I approached Rin. Kirisaki was following behind me.
“Kuon”
Rin looked my way. Then as always, she smiled like she just had remembered something.
“Ah, Kugi-chan….”
“What’s up?”
“No, nothing. It’s just that I couldn’t buy what Nogi-san and Sakurano-san asked me to buy.”
Nogi and Sakurano were surely the names of the two female students from earlier. I was impressed that she remembered her names, or rather something might be wrong with me, who still hasn’t remember most of my classmate’s names by the end of the second year.
“Did you offer it by yourself to go buy it, Kuon-san?”
When Kirisaki asked that, Rin shook her head.
“They gave me the money and told me to buy it. But I have this small body. I can’t get into the crowed before the store. So I couldn’t fulfil their request. …It’s only obvious that they would get angry.”
“They just pushed that onto you. Are you fine with being used like that?”
Rin made a perplexed look.
“With what?”
“I’m saying that you’re their errand girl. Are you fine with that?”
Tilting her head, Rin said as she didn’t get what I said.
“Why wouldn’t I? Buying it doesn’t take all that much time. Rather, it’s quite distressing not being able to eat what you want. I have to try harder next time.”
“….Now really.”
More than I was angry, I was weary, so I unintentional let out a big sigh.
“You’re just an idiot for being so good-natured.”
“Aw, how mean.”
“But it’s not like they have some special circumstances that don’t allow them to go to the store themselves, right? So I think they should by the things they wants to eat by themselves…”
“Just like she said. I’m not going to say anything about your kindness, but you need to be more careful or you’ll be taken advantage of.”
“Really? I wonder.”
Rin crossed her arms and pondered. But soon enough she said with a smile.
“Well, it’s fine. I helped those two.”
….She’s beyond help. A good girl with muscles for a brain.
I tilted my head with a sigh and told her “Anyway, be more careful. Next time they behave like earlier, call me over” and headed with Kirisaki to the rooftop.
“You’re strangely concerned about that girl.”
Kirisaki said while munching on her crimson sweet bread. The package, which made you wonder if it had wine in it, had written “Entrails Taste” on it with letters in a transpiring horror colour. Just where did she buy that.
“I am?”
I shoved a fried egg of my lunch into my mouth. Today they tasted heavily of salmon flake. Well done if I may say so myself. Delicious.
“Usually you treat others like trash, yet you went to her and gave her some advice. I’m a bit worried.”
“What do you take me….”
“Am I wrong?”
Well, she isn’t exactly wrong.
While putting a pea with peanuts sauce into my mouth, I nodded. It was frustrating how I couldn’t deny that.
“Well, her type is rare these days. She’s a good girl, but too much of that, so she’s being taken advantage of.”
“The age where honest people are seen as idiots, huh. Reminds me, she also changes the water for the flower in the classroom, doesn’t she.”
“Let me add that she also comes early to school to polish everyone’s desk. Most people would think she has some hidden motive. Even I did. But she isn’t that smart to scheme something like that. I came to know that.”
“I see.”
“But no one notices it. They all take it for granted that their desk are clean, the flower gets new water and that there’s no trash laying around. Despite that, they use her as some lackey while knowing that she’s a ‘good girl’. Seeing that just doesn’t suit well with me.”
Kirisaki finished her bread and pulled out a pet bottle filled with some red fluid. I thought it was blood, but it turn out to be simple grape juice. How misleading.
“You like her?”
“Hm?”
“No, I’m sorry. Forget that I asked that.”
Kirisaki took off the cap from the juice. took one gulp and then shook her head.
“You’re free to fall in love or date whoever you want. That was our contract from the beginning.”
Surely she had noticed that she made a displeased face despites her words.
“That’s why I’m not concerned whatever feelings you have for her. Yeah. So you don’t have to concern yourself with it either and just treasure these feelings.”
“Kirisaki”
“Mh? —Hau.”
With my chopsticks I put a meatball into the mouth of Kirisaki, who looked my way. The surprised Kirisaki closed her mouth and chewed for a while, then said a single word.
“…Delicious.”
“Don’t get jealous.”
I smiled faintly and ate my rice with furikake.
“I- I’m not jealous or anything.”
“Rest assured. It’s nothing like love. I’m just kinda envious.”
I looked up to the sky. It had annoying blue colour today again.
“I’m just trash, so she seems just too radiant. Though I don’t believe I can become like her, I believe I should be like her. So I always help her on reflex.”
“…I see.”
“Don’t worry about this trivial stuff. By the way, you haven’t done it lately, have you.”
When I said that, Kirisaki answered “Of course” and ducked her chin.
“After I met you, I made a vow and haven’t it done at all since then.”
“Well, okay then. ….But how many people have you done in so far?”
I asked out of curiosity, when Kirisaki stared into space for a while and then answered “…I don’t remember.”
“There are times when I just can’t hold back myself. My memories is vague for around thirty minutes at these times. I somewhat remember it, but it doesn’t feel real to me. If I had to describe it, it’s like I’m watching myself on a TV. When I came back to my sense, there’s a corpse in front of me.”
So she isn’t doing it with a full consciousness. A creepy story. Kirisaki is killing people unconsciousness and then is confronted with the corpse without any preparation.
“…And I always regret it afterwards. I feel relieved, but a guilty feelings still remains.”
Sounds just like masturbating.
“I hate myself the most at these times. I don’t know how I should handle this feeling. So I force myself to forget about the victim….. I know that’s selfish of me.”
“…Well, I won’t pry too much. But well, I’m surprised you could pull that off all over the country.”
“…About that, there’s something on my mind.”
“Mh?”
“Well, it just might be my imagination. It’s simply a matter of a possibility.”
“Just come out with it.”
When I looked at her questioning, Kirisaki opened her mouth halfway, but closed it immediately again.
“…It’s nothing certain. And it didn’t happen lately, so it’s not really worth talking about.”
“Then don’t bring it up.”
“Right, sorry. …By the way.”
“What?”
“Do you remember my earlier words?”
“Which?”
Kirisaki crumpled up the package of the bread she finished earlier and put it into the pocket of her skirt.
Then she drunk up the grape juice and put it on the ground.
” ‘There are times when I just can’t hold back myself’ ”
Then she pulled up her skirt, allowing me to peek at her well-known bear-patterned panties, and pulled out the knife from her holster. …Hold it. My instincts were telling me with all their might to run away.
“Kugito… Can I?”
Kirisaki’s eyes were directed at me and were clouded by desire. She made an expression like an embarrassed maiden with flushed cheeks.
“Stop. You couldn’t be…”
“I could. That half-assed stab to your back earlier turned on my gears.”
“Hey, wai–”
Kirisaki jumped at me. I was pushed to the ground hopelessly and Kirisaki rode on top of me.
Kirisaki erotically licked her lips and ran her finger along my neck. She whispered to me, who was shivering.
“I’ll have you… take responsibility.”
Then I was attacked. Quite literally.
The horny stabbing demon called Kirisaki Kyouko stabbed me around 16 times and in the end petted my wounds. It was an experience not even a maniac suffered and seeing as I was no M, it was merely a adversity to me. I felt like taking a shower while crying.
Nevertheless, I forgave her and after school I parted with the strangely satisfied Kirisaki and quietly went home by myself. I realized how generous I was.
She took off my uniform beforehand, so I avoided the tragedy of having it riddled, but the countless wounds on my body were covered with scurf and hadn’t healed completely yet, so I would surely have a hard time when I took a bath.
Thinking of how I had to stick with her from now on, made me quite soulful, but I stayed optimistic and thought that I would get used to it in time. Guess it’s the influence from my sister that I can adapt my thoughts so easily. Then I suddenly remember that it was the end of the week and I immediately was filled with excitement about the holiday from tomorrow on. I would prefer that you don’t call me simple, but blessed with the ability to adapt to situations.
Encouraging myself like that, I turned the knob and opened the door…..Oh? It wasn’t locked.
When I looked around the entrance hall, I found laying my sister’s things and shoes scattered around.
I tidied up her stuff, took off my own shoes and entered the house.
I could hear the sound of the TV from the living room.
“Sis, you’re home?”
I opened the curtain while asking, when I saw my sister eating a deluxe Sukiyaki lunch box while watching TV.
“Welham hom.”
“You’re eating that again. You need to eat vegetables too or your bones will turn frail.”
“It’s convenient how meat immediately gives you power. You’re home early.”
“I have nothing to do once class ends after all.”
“How sad. When I was in high school, I was more….”
“More what?”
“…Reminds me, you were doing three part-time jobs for living expenses, right? Such a gloomy youth.”
“Thanks for your concern.”
“You’re welcome. Don’t you have a girlfriend? You’re at that age. Go on a date after school or so. I’ll be sure to trail you.”
“First time I see someone announce the trailing beforehand. And I don’t have a girlfriend.”
It’s better I don’t mention that I’m being chased by some weird girl. For own sake. And for the standpoint of my sister.
“You’re home early too, Sis. What’s up?”
“Ah, I slipped away for a bit. I’ll go back once I finished eating this.”
“I see.”
I took the black tea from my sister and gulped it down.
“Ah, watch was that for!”
“You keep getting fatter since you only drink sweet stuff like this.”
“I- I’m not getting fat!”
“Right, you’re just plump.”
“Yep, yep, I’m popular for my cute round face.”
“That’s just a roundabout way to say you have chubby cheeks.”
A carrot with sauce came flying at me. How clever of her to throw the stuff at me that she hates.
“…Onto the next news.”
Then the announcer spoke with a stiff tone while looking at his script.
“Another of these incidents.”
I simple looked at the screen. And then I was horrified.
“Today in the early morning a man, who had collapsed on the street, was found by a woman on her way to work in **City ** District. The man’s body was cut with something sharp like a knife and the man was already dead. His chest was covered with a big cross-shaped wound, so the police investigates particularly with regards to the serial killer incidents that happened all over the country. …We’ll now connect to your correspondent on the scene. Nonaka-san?”
The image changed and showed an unfamiliar three-way street. In the centre stood a man with a microphone. Behind him stood a couple of patrol cars and a few people were running around.
“Yes, Nonaka here. Right now the police is still investigating the scene. About three weeks had passed since the last incident without anything happening at all, so the incident was thought to stay unsettled, but this recurrence has raised the tension within the police force.”
“This came out of nowhere. Headquarters will be a chaos again. Since they’re all impatient.”
My sister started grumbling with an annoyed tone. But my situation was far from that.
“…Sis, I’m going out for a bit.”
“Where to? You only just came home.”
“I have to go!”
I stood up full of go and started heading for the entrance hall. I knew where I had to go.
“Now she has done…!”
I was a fool for trusting her. Now that I thought about it, there was no proof for what she said. If she lied in order to keep me in check, then I was truly a fool for not doubting her in the least.
When I put on my shoes irritated, I spotted Bearzawa-kun. Since I was somehow pissed, I punched him. Bearzawa-kun flew through the air and fell on the floor while still maintaining his smile. “Yo, good evening. When the moon is out, I feel like dancing!” Then how about I let you dance to your death!
“Damn!”
This wasn’t the time to vent my anger on a stuffed animal. I got ready to leave and was about to spring out.
At that moment.
The chime rang.
“Mh? A visitor?”
My sister came to check. She passed by me and asked through the door.
“Who is there?”
The person on the other said answered in a weak voice.
“U- Umm, I—”
All strength left my body, like when the strings were cut from a marionette. What a good timing. No, actually it was bad timing.
“My name is Kirisaki Kyouko and I’m currently in a relationship with Node-san… Is Node-san at home….?”
My sister looked at me.
Her ‘now you have done it’ face pissed me off quite a bit.
“Oh my, I’m sorry that I don’t have anything prepared. Just take your time! Do you want some juice? Kugito, we still had some snacks, didn’t we? Like some chocolate. Aw geez, I’m a bit careless, so I don’t know where stuff is in the house. I’m sorry.”
My sister said so smiling, when Kirisaki somewhat shyly responded to the hospitality.
“No, not all… I apologize for coming over so suddenly. There was something I wanted to discuss with Node-san….”
Since Kirisaki had said all that with flushed cheeks, my sister was quite excited, put her hands together and shouted.
“So~ cute~!”
She hugged her from behind and rubbed her cheeks against hers. That…. That wasn’t my sister.
“How cold of you, Kugito. Why didn’t you tell me that you had such a cute girl besides you.”
“No, she isn’t really my girlfriend or anything.”
“You don’t need to be embarrassed. Or did you thought I would worry when I knew you had a girlfriend? Oh please, I’m not that overprotective. Rather I’m worried about that drawn back character of yours. Even as a high schooler, you didn’t find a single girl and always made a stupid spaced out face like a dog in the summer heat. But you still had it in you after all.”
I felt like she insulted me continuously without a care, but whatever. That didn’t matter now.
“Like I told you, Sis, she’s…”
“Hey, Kirisaki-san, what do you like about Kugito? While he’s my little brother, he still doesn’t seem to be the type to be popular with the girls.”
“Ah, ehm….His gently side….”
“Kyaa! So love-struck!”
Listen to me, even if it’s just for five minutes!
“Sis… Leave us alone and go back to work. You just slipped away, right?”
“Eh? Ah, right. Damn. It just got so interesting.”
My sister sighed when she looked at the clock. Then she faced Kirisaki and told her “Okay, Kirisaki-san, just feel at home here. I mean it. I’ll be home late. So you can try a couple of stuff, you know. How should I call it, the mistakes of youth? Anyway, everything’s allowed! That guy is a virgin, so he probably sucks at it, so you have to do something about it yourself!” with a hand on her shoulder.
“Just get out of here, you pervert.”
“So mean! … I get it already!”
While puffing up her cheeks, my sister somewhat happy left for the second floor with dance steps. Soon enough she came down wearing a suit and left with a “See you” while waving her hand.
Kirisaki saw her off with a smile and the moment the door closed, she was back to her usual boldness.
“What an interesting sister.”
“…Don’t speak about my sister right now.”
I pressed my hand against my forehead and sighed. “So…” I looked down to Kirisaki, who sat on a chair.
“Let’s start by how you knew where I live.”
“To make it short and precise, I asked Kuon Rin.”
Is that so. Well, I somehow expected that.
“Then, that aside. …There’s another thing I want to ask you.”
“I know.”
Kirisaki said.
“…It’s about what was in the news, right?”
“Yeah. …You lied to me, didn’t you? Have you forgotten already why I put up with your eccentricity? Or did you do it knowingly? Either way, you’re the worst.”
Breathing out. Kirisaki shook her head and looked up to me.
“It wasn’t me.”
“Huh?”
“I came here to tell you that.”
“…What do you mean?”
I sat down on a chair and looked straight at Kirisaki. She likewise looked straight into my eyes.
“Just what I have said.”
She specified.
“The incident reported in the news wasn’t done by me.”
“What?”
“Everything I told you was the truth. As long as I have you, there’s no need for me to become the <Midnight killing Devil>. Therefore I haven’t killed a single person since I met you.”
“….I hope that’s true.”
“If you don’t believe me, we can’t proceed our conversation. If you insist on doubting me, then we’re done here.”
I crossed my arms and looked Kirisaki into the eyes. She lightly nodded. Sadly I wasn’t that experience to tell if was lying just by looking her into the eyes. But at least Kirisaki didn’t avert her gaze even by a millimetre.
“…Okay.”
I decided to trust her for now.
“Thanks.”
Kirisaki gave a small smile.
“So, what’s going on.”
Kirisaki uttered a “Mhm”, then kept quiet for a bit. Then she murmured softly.
“My guess is— Someone is imitating my crime.”
“A copycat criminal?”
“Probably. …Do you have a computer?”
“Nah, we can’t afford to buy something that expensive.”
Kirisaki nodded in comprehension and stood up.
“Then let’s go to my room. ….I have some clues.”
In the room that was as plain as before, Kirisaki served me some tea, opened the lid of her notebook and turned it on.
Meanwhile I idly drank my tea and looked around the room. The last time I was here I hadn’t noticed it, but there was a book shelf packed with manga, novels and pocketbooks.
“You like to read?”
“Yeah, specially manga.”
“What’s your favourite?”
“Doraemon.”
I involuntarily spouted my tea. This answer was so different from her character.
“What’s up?”
“No… I only had expected something more bloody.”
“Can you proudly admit that your favourite book is a porn book? Liking and desire are two different things.”
I see. “But still, Doraamon?”
“It’s a good manga. It shows you that the future is limitless. It makes living enjoyable.”
“Guess you can look at it like that. By the way, which character do you like?”
“Suneo.”
“Yet another weird pick.”
“Nobita is a coward that clads himself with in good-nature. Shizuka is unrealistic. Gian is disappointing and only becomes a good guy in the movie, which is hypocrisy, so I hate him. Suneo appears the most realistic.”
“I like Nobita though. I sympathize with him, since he’s aware of his own stupidity and laziness, yet is ready to risk is life.”
“A typical answer from you.”
Kirisaki said amused and moved the mouse. This might have been the very first time I had such a normal conversation with her.
“Look here.”
She turned the notebook so that I could look at it too. We were both peeking at it. The screen showed a black background with white gothic letters that said <Alice Tea Party>.
“What’s this?”
“A private website on the internet… A so called homepage.”
“Well, I see that much….Alice Tea Party? Is it Alice from Wonderland?”
“Yeah.”
She clicked on the enter button below the site’s name, when the site asked for a password. Quite the security for a personal website. A membership system, huh.
“To tell the truth, this is an underground site. Average people can’t access it.”
“Underground?”
“It means under the surface. Only those who cleared a certain condition, will get a mail from the admin with a password.”
In no time the top page appeared. The background was still black and it the middle was a teapot, which had a malicious skull mark. How vulgar. Below it was written:
<Congratulations to you, who spent a boring life>
There were little contents. Only a BBS, a chat and an admin contact form.
“What’s this site for?”
“It’s mainly a site for people, who have a liking for crimes, to talk about their feelings, which they usually can’t express.”
Geh.
“And there’s something particular about these people. It’s rumoured that 90% of all the grotesque crimes around world are committed by people who access this site.”
“…Isn’t that a problem?”
“That what makes it interesting.”
Kirisaki clicked accustomed on the BBS. A common tree BBS popped up. While we had no computer at home, I knew at least these technical terms from just now, because we have a computer class at school. That’s how it was. I had no idea though who I was explaining myself to.
“On the other hand, they say even the police is on this site, since it’s gives a good opportunity to cope with crimes. Well, it’s all a rumour at best.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, look here.”
Saying that, Kirisaki clicked a random thread title.
There the thread starter, who called herself a housewife in the 30s, was talking about her abnormal liking. Apparently she couldn’t climax during sex when she didn’t see the blood-shot face of her partner, so she ended up strangling her sex partners to death. Then understanding people suggested that she should only strangle them to the utmost limit without killing them. On a different thread a guy, who had the fetish of changing out his own eyeballs with that of someone else, was endlessly going on about who had the best eyeballs so far. When I looked at the replies, there was someone suggesting to try out cutting off the own fingers and sew back on the fingers from a woman. Furthermore, there was a guy, who considered a bag made of human skin cooler and manlier than any brand one, since it was easier to use, speaking with someone, who was doing the same, and considering if they should meet up and exchange their stuff.
“….I feel sick just by reading this.”
I massaged my temples and averted my eyes from the screen. It really wasn’t something to look at steadfast.
“Wouldn’t get such a site get taken down immediately? Announcing crimes on the internet is a hot topic these days, isn’t it?”
“First off, the admin of the site never shows his face. Second, a direct access to the site is nearly impossible. <Alice Tea Party> doesn’t use a provider, but is set up on a private server. It’s hard to determine it’s owner.”
“But what if someone of the participants goes to report it to the police?”
“Happened already a few times. It was even once shut down by the warning of the police. But not long after it was rebooted on a new server. It’s a vicious circle. Besides.”
“Beside?”
“As I told you earlier, there’s a rumour that the police takes no decisive steps, since it’s a good opportunity to cope with the crimes instead.”
“Yeah. …Though to me it only looks like the site is promoting crimes.”
“That’s were you’re wrong. Gakuto, do you know the absolute flaw of the convenient tool called the internet?”
“…That you can’t see the other party’s face?”
“A clichéd answer, but yes. No matter how much one makes himself a good person on the internet, as long as you don’t deal with him personally, it will always stay an illusion created by words. There’s a good chance that the guy, who boast that he got a new girl every day, graduated from Toudai and is a qualified lawyers, is actually a 30 years old fat otaku NEET that didn’t leave his house for 10 years.”
“Right.”
“Why do you think people create fake identities on the internet?”
“Well, because it’s feels better. Rather than admitting to one’s own boring self, it’s more fun to spent time by pretending to be someone really great. After all, you won’t get into a close relationship with those you meet on the internet anyway.”
“Yeah. And the feeling of liberation by putting on a mask lets people be more forthright. On the internet, a docile person nonchalant insults someone else or merciless flames, discounting his own weak self that stands in contrast to the fictional work of movies, manga or novels. That all comes from the release of the drive that was being restrained within us. <I’m not like that>, <I’m better than this>, <That guy gets acknowledged while I’m being excoriated. That’s not right.>. We usually can’t easily voice such thoughts. But on the internet, where we are all isolated and separated from each other, we can voice them out freely. One can show his true nature or act out a personality as much as he wants.”
“So what?”
“These two might appear different, but they share a common basis.”
“Just tell me your conclusion already.”
“Don’t rush me. I meant that either of them relieves you from your daily stress, discontent and grumbling. The joy of having others believe your fake personality and the pleasure of being able to release plenty of one’s self, which can’t be shown to others. Most of the people feel better with that and return to the reality that only restrains themselves. Well, though sometimes there are people who ignore that and just devote themselves to their internet self.
Anyway, try to imagine what would happen to these people if they hadn’t had the internet.”
“…Well, not everyone, but surely some of them would overload on the stress and snap.”
“Exactly.”
Kirisaki looked at me with a face that said ‘Now you understand’. As opposed as I was, I had no choice but to admit to that.
In short it was like this: These abnormal and perverse crimes that were described on the board, weren’t necessarily all conducted in real life. There was a possibility that people, who wanted to do these actions, but couldn’t accomplish them in the end, just acted out their <self who did that> on this site and thus gained a temporary satisfaction. Before they knew it, these people would be in a world where they <accomplished their actions without actually doing them> and their desire to accomplish the crimes in real life would disappear. Certainly, in that way <Alice Tea Party> might cope with crimes.
“There you have it. But it’s just a floating rumour, so nothing certain.”
“…I understand. So, you’re a regular on this site?”
“I wrote a couple of times on the board. I tried to make a list of my crimes.”
“Why would you do that.”
“…..I had hoped the drive inside me would be satisfied with that. But it was no use. It seems my drive can’t be answered by this fake kind of satisfaction.”
Well, if desire could be answered by the mere thought of “I had sex”, then mankind would have gone extinct long ago.
“Still, the contents of this site were quite interesting, so I checked them on a daily basis. That’s when I found a slightly disturbing post.”
Kirisaki typed <March Hare> into the board’s search function and pushed the enter-key.
“By the way, why is the site called <Alice Tea Party>? I only saw the anime of Alive in Wonderland, but it was far from the grotesque stuff here.”
“In Lewis Carroll’s <Alice in Wonderland>, the heroine Alice attends a strange tea party held by strange characters by chance.”
A lot of results appeared on the screen. Kirisaki clicked the scroll bar and scrolled down.
Then she stopped at a certain result and clicked the button to show the entire thread.
“Carroll calls it a <Mad Tea Party>.”
…I see. That certainly fit this site.
“Now there is someone with the nickname <March Hare>, which is a character of that tea party.”
The thread title was <Midnight killing Devil>.
The contents were about the recent serial killer that left behind a cross-shaped wound. The abnormality of repeating the crimes all over the country and the merciless way of killing received high valuation. It worried me how Kirisaki was called a <god> frequently.
A confident post from someone that seemed to have an acquaintance with the police. stated that the crime was committed precisely at midnight.
“Is that true?”
I asked the criminal herself. Kirisaki slightly shook her head.
“It’s not. Certainly, I killed during the night to avoid detection, but it wasn’t precisely at midnight. Besides, it was a complete different time when I killed you too, wasn’t it.”
Now that she mentioned it. Back then, I thought it was strange.
“I guess this thread got leaked somewhere, which resulted in that nickname. I had no intention at all to grace myself with it. There’s obviously no need to commit a murder at midnight when there’s no merit to it.”
“But the thread stated <Our god embeds a high grade of art in the crime. The cross-shaped wound and the midnight time are for that very reason.>”
“Kugito, only characters of a manga or some bad kid with no brains would embed art into a murder. I never believed that my actions were the least bit magnificent. Well, in any case a crime should be nasty. Don’t you agree?”
Of course I had no intention to agree to that. But
“Then why did you inflict a cross-shaped wound?”
“Just a habit.”
….Is that so. She, who gave off an aura of “The cross-shape wound represents Jesus’s crucifixion itself. It’s proof of lamenting over the fact that I myself are an existence that’s capable of probing the filthy humans and that the crimes are god’s iron hammer.”, suddenly looked pitiful to me.
Scrolling further down, there was another reply by <March Hare>. Guess he must have hit the word limit, as it seemed to continue from where the previous post left off.
This time though he was talking about his discontent about the <Midnight killing Demon>. He pointed out the flaws, like the wild way of killing, the naivety in disposing the corpse or the use of a specific weapon. He ended his post with the words “I could do a better job”. Previous to that, not many replies had <Midnight killing Devil> in it, so the sudden rise in Kirisaki’s popularity was eye-catching. Kirisaki must have felt the same as she looked into my eyes and nodded lightly.
“Giving information only you know to show off that you understand the person the best and when everyone’s attention is caught and they start praising, you switch over to the opposition. A typical example of a critic with a strong need for admiration. It’s not just the <March Hare>, there are a lot of people like that on the internet.”
“How selfish. I guess if you take guys like that serious, they’ll only get more arrogant.”
“Well, to begin with it wasn’t done to get people to complain. I ignored him at first too. But.”
She clicked on the next page. Again March Hare’s name was there. He wrote the following:
“Lately, the crimes of our God, the <Midnight killing Devil>, are too artless. The initial beauty and philosophy are gone.”
Thinking that he was about the only one, who wanted to see some art or philosophy in the crimes, I read on how March Hare continued.
“Our God might be dead. As sad as it is, we no longer can do anything about it. But, we cannot let our God’s glorious deeds go to waste. We need someone to succeed our God.”
What…? How inappropriate.
Guess I wasn’t the only one to think that, as there followed replies asking about the meaning of March Hare’s word. That prolonged the thread abnormally, before he answered again.
“Of course people would be curious about my words. It’s only the beginning now. Look forward to it. Over.”
“Not that I really care, but he sounded quite arrogant. I thought one needed to be even more mannered on the internet than in real life.”
“He’s the type that thinks that arrogance proves his own high standing. Don’t take it to mind. When I read this thread, I tried sending him a mail. I was curious to what he was up to.”
“But there was no reply?”
“You’re quick on the uptake.”
“Guess that’s the ‘something on your mind’ that you mentioned on the rooftop. Even I have some brain cells I can use. I figured it out mostly. You didn’t get a reply to your mail. Then there were no more replies to this post. You had no more clues, so you gave up. But then.”
“Yeah.”
Kirisaki nodded on my words.
“After that I saw the news reporting a crime of the <cross-slashing Devil>, which I had no memory of.”
“…How many of these hot-topic crimes were your doing?”
“A third—Or maybe even less. Even I can’t make it as far as Akita or Kyushu.”
“That means, the crimes there were done by March Hare—”
“–in my stead. Yes, that’s a possibility.”
Kirisaki sighed.
“…I have no proof if he has done it, so I didn’t say anything. And it strangely calmed down lately. But now it came back.”
“…I see. So, what are you going to about it?”
“About what?”
Kirisaki made a perplexed expression. I pointed to the screen while saying with a accusing tone.
“Your killing spree is what caused such a nutcase to appear. How are you going to take responsibility for it.”
“Even if you ask that.”
Kirisaki put her elbow on the desk and rested her cheek on it and she waved her other free hand flittering besides her head.
“Assuming that we’re going to punish him somehow, just what do you expect me to do when I don’t know his name, address or even face?”
Well, she had a point..
“So we can’t do anything even though we know what a dangerous nutcase he is, huh.”
“The dilemma of the internet.”
“Is our only choice is to leave him be…?”
“Going by the facts, yes….But, people are murdered by a guy that pretends to be me. Simply sitting idle and watching that isn’t my style.”
“But there’s nothing we can do, is there?”
“Guess so… I would like to compile the information and any witness’s report on this site to get some kind of solution, but I don’t know how effective that will be.”
Kirisaki puckered her lips displeased. Guess she didn’t like how we currently weren’t even on the tail of the criminal that was mimicking her. Despite being a serial killer, Kirisaki was just a simple female high school student. When she didn’t have an investigation power like the police, there was no way she had any original connections.
“…Is there nothing I can do?”
Kirisaki looked my way with her almond eyes.
“That’s a surprising statement from you. Usually you only care for yourself.”
“What do you take me for? Even I have an average sense of justice.”
“…That’s really hard to believe.”
What a coincidence. For me too.
“….Well, jokes asides. Just telling you to give your best and going home wouldn’t suit well with me.”
“I see. Now that half-assed attitude is more like you.”
Was she making fun of me?
Kirisaki said while closing the site.
“Then there’s one thing I would like you to do.”
“What is it?”
“Forget it.”
She turned off the notebook.
“Forget all about it and go back to your normal life. Me aside, this doesn’t concern you at all. I doubt the copy-cat killer will came as far as to this city.”
“…But.”
“What? Do you have some decisive hint for identifying the culprit?”
“No, no such thing.”
“I know it’s a mean to say this, but then there is nothing you can do. At any rate, this is my own problem.”
I kept quiet. While I was opposed to it, Kirisaki was certainly right. There was nothing I could do. I hated my own incapability a bit.
However—-there was something bothering me.
“… May I speak?”
“What is it?”
“Well, who do you think was it that throughout smashed that so called “normal life” with a hammer to oblivion?”
“Fate…Yeah, an existence above the clouds…”
“It was you!”
“How rude. All I did was stabbing you!”
“To hell with you ‘all I did’! In which world would you find a crazy guy that answers ‘Geez, you’re so helpless. It’s no big deal, so I’ll forgive you.’?”
“….”
“Point the finger at yourself before you point it at me.”
“You mean, in the end I’m the only one to forgive myself? I see, I get it. I’ll forgive myself! Okay, Kugito, today it’ll be the innards. Stick out your stomach.”
I slapped her without mercy on the cheek.
“Ow! Domestic Violence!”
From who! Actually, it means something else!
“….Somehow I’m tired. I’m going home.”
I stood up while pressing my temples.
“Yeah, that’s good. That’s better for your psyche rather than to waste time by bemoaning your futility.”
“You…”
Could it be she was considerate towards—
“…can’t be. So stupid. I’m going home.”
“It saddens me that you weren’t struck in surprise there.”
“Maybe not by surprise, but I’m sure you’ll strike me.”
I brought the stupid conversation to and end and went on my way home.
My head was filled with the peaceful thought of how I’m going to explain the situation with Kirisaki to my sister.
Now that I thought about it, Kirisaki’s words made perfect sense.
The copy-cat killer that repeats crimes as a fake <Midnight killing Devil>. He’s not an existence to be ignored, but there’s nothing I can do about it. Sure, I’m immortal and better at fighting than the average guy, but that’s all. Not only didn’t I have the strength to pull of the stunt of catching the criminal that’s roils Japan, I didn’t even have the brains for it. Like always, I noticed how useless I am.
Well, whatever. Like Kirisaki said, that all didn’t concern me. The possibility that the country-wide operating criminal will show up in this small city by chance is zero. I’ll follow her order and forget about it. Japan police, give it your all in catching this nutcase. I’ll hold down the other one.
The sun was already going down. The people and buildings were coloured red. While holding in a yawn, I was walking sloppy towards my house. When.
“Huh, Kugi-chan.”
I heard a familiar voice and turned around. Kuon Rin in her uniform was waving her hand.
“Yo. On your way home? Quite late.”
“Yeah. I was cleaning the square and later was asked by the teacher to do a couple of things, so before I noticed, it got so late.”
Rin draw closer with small steps and slapped my back.
“You’re out quite late too, Kugi-chan.”
“I’m a delinquent, so this is just perfect.”
“Even a delinquent might go straight home after school.”
“What’s the point of being a delinquent then?”
Also, didn’t she just consent to me being a delinquent?
“Then you’re a honour student, Kugi-chan?”
“If I’m a honour student, then what are you? A goddess?”
“Worship me!”
I ruffled her head.
“Gya! My hair! What chat for!”
“Sorry. That’s how our religion worships our gods.”
I lightly laughed when Rin angrily puffed her cheeks.
“Hey, want to walk together?”
“No need to specially ask that. Aren’t we walking together already?”
“Ah, right.”
“But you sure are a rare kind.”
When I scratched my head and said that, Rin looked perplexed.
“Why?”
“Well, I always wanted to tell you. Nothing good will happen to you if you stick together with a guy like me. Quite the contrary, lately a rumour is going around saying you’re my underling. Did you know?”
“No way.”
“Yes way.”
“Your underling, huh…Then I need to add ‘yo man’ at the end of every sentence.”
What age did she live in?
“Well, it’s fine. After all I’m doing as I please.”
“Well, yeah…”
I walked besides Rin on the dusk-coloured road.
I had nothing special to talk about, so I kept quiet, but when Rin asked me something, I answered back accordingly.
I thought about what Kirisaki would say if she saw us like this, then wondered why I would even think of her now. That monologue pained me.
“…What’s wrong?”
“Nah, nothing. I was only pondering who it was that said that a random coincidence was an inevitability.”
And that I would like to smack that person while denying these words. I wouldn’t accept that this outcome was predestined. It was all due to my bad luck.
“? I don’t really get it. You say some difficult stuff, Kugi-chan.”
“Yeah. You on the other hand only say some easy stuff. I want to learn from you.”
“…Was that a bit of sarcasm?”
That she noticed it was impressive alone.
But when I thought about it, Rin really did only talk about average stuff. About what she watched on TV yesterday, about the delicious cake she ate recently, about the interesting new game, about a touching movie, etc, etc.
That’s the common sense I want to teach the witch that endless goes on about the sensation of cutting through flesh and it’s accompanying emotion or the difference in the absolute charm between flowing blood and paint.
“That’s what a young female high school girl is about. But it’s not like you’re doing good deeds all day, right.”
“Well, of course. I’m a girl after all. I’m interested in fashion like any other, I want to keep a cute pet and…”
“And?”
“…even fell in love.”
“Hee. That’s a first. I’m curious what your type of man is.”
“I won’t tell you. I gave up anyway.”
“Why?”
“There was no hope for me.”
“That’s not like you. You’re always so annoying energetic around me.”
“….Idiot.”
She called me an idiot. I wasn’t sure how I should take this out of context insult. I guess I should get angry for now?
“Hmpf, just go ahead.”
What was she getting angry for.
Rin puckered her lips, went ahead and suddenly said “Ah”.
“What’s up.”
Before us was a crosswalk and a child was waiting alone at the traffic light. I wondered where her mother was, when I spotted her on the other side of the street waving her hand. The child must have not been able to keep up with the mother.
“Excuse me for second.”
Rin approached the child with small steps and said something. The child was hesitating a bit, but when Rin smiled and put out her hand, it shyly grabbed it.
In time, the traffic light changed to green and Rin crossed the crosswalk together with the kid. I followed behind them.
Rin matched her steps completely to the child’s one. A feast impossible to me. It was a drowsy slow pace, but for some reason I didn’t find it annoying.
When we arrived on the other said, the mother thanked her, but Rin only answer “No problem”. Then she squatted, patted the child on the head and said “See you”. The child nodded and said “Bye, bye” while waving it’s hand, then left together with it’s mother.
“Okay, let us get going too.”
Rin didn’t boast about her natural conducted good deed, made a face like she only did what she had to do and faced towards me.
I looked down a bit. Then we resumed our walk together.
“Hey.”
I called from behind Rin.
“What?”
“…Why are you like that?”
“Mh?”
Rin turned around without stopping.
“Like what?”
“Well, like…”
I scratched my head.
“How should I say. Doing things that don’t get you anything every day. It’s not like you gain anythign by it. I couldn’t do that.”
“It’s not like I’m doing it because I want something in return.”
That I knew.
“Mhm. ….What can I say.”
Rin faced forwards and looked up to the sky.
“When I leave troubled people alone, my chest gets this funny restless feeling. Like it’s saying that I didn’t do anything, even though there was supposed to be something I could have done. And there is no guarantee that someone is going to do something about that restless feeling of mine later on. So I think it’s better to make a move, so that I don’t get that feeling to begin with.”
….I see.
“….Besides, you can do it too, Kugi-chan.”
“Me? What?”
“You’re pretty considerate to me in various ways. Even today.”
“No, well…”
But that was only because it was you. I wouldn’t care for anyone that I don’t know.
“It doesn’t change the fact that you helped me. Everyone’s like that. They want to help their important person. Want to do something for it. Isn’t that so?”
“Well, yeah….”
“I don’t mean to brag, but I have a lot of that <important person>.”
Rin said with a smile.
“That’s all to it, I think.”
“….You’re amazing.”
There’s too much of a difference between us. Don’t tell me you also seriously wish for world peace?
“I do, something wrong with that?”
“No, nothing wrong with that.”
I shook my head.
“So you don’t think that you’re getting the short end of the stick? There aren’t that many who repay kindness with kindness. Like these girls today.”
“That’s not true. Though things like today do happen sometimes…. When I do the greening campaign on Sunday or when I help out at the nursing home, I’m often told ‘Thank you’. Don’t you think that’s a precious gain? I mean, it doesn’t happen all so often that you get thanked every day.
But whenever you’re kind to someone, the occurrence increases by one. So I don’t think I’m getting the short end of the stick at all.”
What to say, you’re second to none.
“You’re even kind to a worthless guy like me.”
“You’re not worthless!”
She replied with a rather serious tone to my casually said words. I stopped unintentional.
“…I tell you I am.”
There wasn’t anyone as worthless as me.
“That’s not true. Everyone is needed by someone, just by being alive.”
Thanks. But you can only say that since you’re happy.
“Then, why aren’t you allowed to be happy, Kugi-chan?”
Because the condition doesn’t apply to me. Since it’s not certain if I’m <alive>.
“….I don’t get what you’re saying.”
Rin crossed her arms and tilted her head lost in thought.
“But that’s not good at all.”
“What is?”
“To presume by yourself that you’re unwanted. That’s rude to the people who think that you’re needed.”
“There isn’t anyone like that.”
“There is.”
“Is not.”
“IS!”
You’re quite persistent on that.
“You don’t get it, Kugi-chan…. Don’t you remember it?”
“What?”
“You saved me during the freshman year when I was bullied by the boys.”
….Doesn’t ring a bell.
“For you it might have been something trivial, but for me it was something to be really thankful of….Since I was small, I tried to be kind, but was hated instead and bullied a lot. At these times I thought I should just stop being kind. But then you saved me and when I told you the reason for the bullying you simply said:”
Rin looked me into the face and said.
“You’re an idiot.”
I was such an ass.
“…But you also said that I’m great and respect worthy. I was really happy. It was the first time someone acknowledged the things I had done.”
That I didn’t remember that made me even more of an ass. I should at least remember what I said myself!
“As you see, you can’t decided by yourself what others think of you.”
Rin draw closer and grabbed my hand.
“So, never think that you’re worthless.”
I didn’t answer. Rin said.
“I’m sure even Kirisaki would find it sad.”
“…I wonder.”
“Besides, I also think it’s sad.”
Rin turned around and started to walk.
“Makes it look like it even denies my feelings of l….”
I couldn’t hear what you said well. Say it once more.
“….Hmpf. See you!”
Rin walked away without looking back.
“Ugh!
Immediately after she tripped. Ohh, her panties were in plain view. White-blue striped panties. Nice. Wait, it wasn’t the time for that.
“…Are you okay?”
I was going to give her a hand, but Rin stood up by herself while saying “I… I’m okay”.
“Th- Then, see you!”
Then somewhat hurried, she once again walked away.
“…What an oddball.”
I pondered while I watched Rin’s back with a wry smile.
—Then, why aren’t you allowed to be happy, Kugi-chan?
One has to shoulder an equivalent risk when straying from the path.
I recalled Kirisaki’s words.
Happiness.
I’m sure the risk I’m shouldering in order to live is that I don’t have it.
