The Optimistic Heroes
Chapter 2
Swally and the Ants
(1)
With the likes of Big G and Dash, what they could accomplish together was already enough to leave most people speechless... Then there was Swally.
The things Swally did by himself were more amazing than anything three hundred random people combined were capable of doing. So what happened when you added Big G to the mix? And then added Dash?
Fate just had to throw the three of them together. What could be done?
(2)
It wasn't like Big G and Dash were poor every day, all the time. Occasionally, there would be times when they weren't poor. The thing was, no one knew when they were going to be poor, and there certainly wasn't anyone who knew where their money came from.
They themselves were not even sure.
Their money always came unexpectedly, they themselves even thought it was a little absurd at times. This could also be due to the fact that their spending habits were even more absurd.
Fall was approaching. The trees in the back garden of Prosperity Villa were suddenly full of big, juicy pears. If you picked them all it was enough to fill dozens of baskets. If you sold them all, it would be about 20 to 30 silver taels worth.
The pears grew on the trees all by themselves. People would ask about the price, and then pick them all by themselves. During the whole process, they didn't have to lift a finger.
This money more or less just fell from the sky. Of course this was a reason to celebrate. To celebrate, obviously you needed to have some alcohol. If you had some alcohol, well you definitely needed some good meat as well. Dash had principles: out of nice clothes, gambling, whoring, and eating, food was the most practical expense, and also the thing he enjoyed most.
To start, he always ate lying down: sleep eating. When he got excited about eating he would even sit up to eat. If he was tired from eating, he would lie down, to continue his eating lying down.
His bed was greasier than the kitchen table. Wherever you put your hand, you could always find a piece or two of leftover meat, a few bones that could still be nibbled on.
Big G wasn't necessarily a clean person, but he wouldn't dare to sleep on Dash's bed, he preferred the floor.
Dash was happy to have the bed to himself. This bed was not only where he slept, it was also his living room, his garden, and his table.
Even more amazing was when he drank on his bed. Lying down, he would point the bottle at his mouth and glug-glug, with one swig not a drop was spilt anywhere.
Big G was pretty impressed with this skill. He also wanted to try drinking while lying down, but he hesitated, and couldn't help but ask, "Can you really get it all down when you are already lying down?"
Dash: "Of course."
Big G: "Won't it squirt out of your nose?"
Dash: "No way, even if you were hanging upside down, it wouldn't squirt out of your nose."
Big G: "How would you know?"
Dash: "I have tried it."
Big G just laughed, "You are too lazy to even sit up, how would you have been hanging upside down?"
Dash: "If you don't believe me then why don't you try it yourself?"
So Big G hung himself upside down and pointed the bottle towards his mouth. He started to drink slowly, after just two swigs, it started to squirt out of his nose.
At this very moment, he saw Swally—he saw Swally's feet first.
Swally's feet were like most people's feet, but his boots were extraordinary.
His boots were made of calf leather, with exquisite stitching, and a decorative flower pattern. They were in no way inferior to the royal boots worn by the lords beyond the Great Wall.
This wasn't in itself strange.
The strange thing was that these boots had everything, everything except soles.
His clothes had been magnificent, very well fitted; but now, they were worn and tattered, without a single piece of the original garment intact.
Only the cap on his head was definitely a nice hat.
He wasn't very tall, but his arms and legs were quite long.
He had an elegant face, even a little feminine. Big eyes, a small mouth, with two dimples when he smiled. But when he wasn't smiling, his face suddenly become cold as ice; pallid, to the point of scaring people away.
His clothes appeared to have been a light greenish-blue, but now they were a patchy mix of red and yellow.
The yellow was naturally mud, but what about the red?
Could it be blood?
The two of them had been enjoying a nice drink at home, when suddenly a person like this came charging in. That was certainly enough to startle most people.
But Dash was practically sleeping and Big G was hanging upside down. They didn't really notice him at first.
If you had walked into a room and seen a person sleep drinking, and the other person trying to drink hanging upside down. You would probably think that you had walked into a mental institute by mistake. Even if you weren't scared away, you would at least find it a little creepy.
But this person didn't appear shocked at all. This was Swally: as if he felt that hanging upside down and drinking was quite normal, that drinking while sitting was strange.
Big G's feet were hooked around the roof beams.
With a sudden tumble through the air, Swally also hooked his feet onto the roof beams. Facing Big G as if this would be the best way to carry on their conversation.
But he didn't say anything.
Big G found him amusing, he squinted his eyes making a funny face.
Swally made a funny face right back.
Big G: "How's it going."
Swally: "Good."
"Want a drink?" Big G asked as he rolled his eyes.
Swally: "Sure."
Big G passed him the bottle. He was hoping to see what alcohol dripping out of this person's nose would look like.
Who knew that this person could drink! Glug-glug, with one swig half the bottle was gone, without a drop being spilt.
Big G stared blankly, "Have you drank like this before?"
Swally: "A few times."
With sudden laughter, Big G explained: "I wanted to see if I could drink hanging upside down."
If a person had tried something like this before, there probably wasn't much that he hadn't tried.
Big G couldn't help but laugh, "What else have you tried before?"
Swally: "I have pretty much tried anything that you can think of."
"Is there anything in the world that is more uncomfortable than drinking upside down?" Big G replied laughing.
Swally: "A few things."
Big G: "Like what? What is the most painful?"
Swally: "Nailed shut in a coffin and buried in the ground was the worst."
"You tried that too?" Big G was staring at him with his eyes wide open.
Swally: "Well not that many times, just twice."
Big G suddenly somersaulted down through the air, and stared at him.
Swally had a straight face.
After a long while, Big G finally sighed, "If you are not the king of boasting then you are certainly a strange kind of freak."
"He is a freak." Dash said all of a sudden.
Swally just laughed, "The feeling is mutual."
Big G clasped his hands laughing loudly, "Not bad, not bad, we are all freaks, otherwise we all wouldn't be here."
"The first time I came here I wanted to rob the place, what about you?" Big G asked right away.
Swally: "I am not interested in becoming a robber, because, I already am."
Big G looked him up and down real good. He couldn't help but smile and said, "A thief like you, is certain to be a stupid thief."
Swally: "Not stupid, I have just had some bad luck."
Big G: "Bad luck?"
"If it wasn't for rotten luck, how could I have ended up charging in here?" Swally sighed.
Big G: "True, what exactly are you doing here?"
Swally: "I am not doing anything, I just need a place to hide."
Big G: "Why are you hiding?"
Swally: "Because people want to nail me inside a coffin and bury me."
Big G: "Who is it this time?"
Swally: "The Ants."
Big G's mouth dropped open, his jaw almost fell off, "You... ... What did you say?"
Swally: "I said The Ants."
Big G: "Ants?"
He suddenly bent over with laughter, "If you are afraid of ants, you sure are courageous," he managed to say despite having troubles breathing.
Sighing, Swally just shook his head, "Looks like you don't get out much, you don't even know who The Ants are."
Big G: "When I was three I knew what ants were."
Swally: "What?"
Big G: "Ants are very very small little insects that crawl around on the ground. There are a bunch on Dash's bed, I can catch a few and show you what they are."
Swally: "I am not talking about this kind of ants, they are people."
Big G stared blankly, "People, ants are people?"
Swally: "It is four people, the Ant King and his little entourage of ants."
Big G: "Oh?"
Swally: "These four people, one is called the Golden Ant, one is the called the Silver Ant, and there is the Red Ant, and the last one is called the White Ant."
Big G couldn't help but laugh, "Since there is a red and white ant, shouldn't there be a black ant as well?"
Swally: "There was one actually, but he is already dead."
Big G blinked, "Since they are clearly people, why are they called The Ants?"
Swally: "Lots of people have nicknames."
Big G: "If you are going to have a nickname, you should at least pick something awe-inspiring, like 'The Winged Tiger,' or 'Golden Lion,' you can have any nickname you want. Why would you want to be called an ant?"
Swally: "Because they are all really small, they are all midgets."
The more Big G listened the more outrageous it sounded. He couldn't stop laughing, "So what is so scary about midgets?"
Swally: "These midgets are not only scary, they are extremely dangerous. In fact, they are probably some of the most dangerous people in the world."
Big G: "Oh? What makes them so dangerous?"
Swally: "They each possess a very special kind of kung Fu, even the top master from the Emei sect was killed by them."
Big G: "Since they are so terrifying, why did you provoke them?"
Swally was sighing... "Because I ran into some trouble with money, such rotten luck, in two weeks I lost more than fifteen rounds, I even had to sell the soles of my boots to pay back my gambling debts..."
"What?" Big G shouted. "You sold your soles to pay back gambling debt?"
Swally: "Correct."
Big G: "How much did you owe?"
Swally: "About seven to eight thousand."
Big G: "How much did you sell your soles for?"
Swally: "I sold my two soles for a total of thirteen hundred silver taels."
The more he talked the more absurd it sounded. Big G thought he might as well keep on listening to see what other nonsense would come out of his mouth. He was trying very hard not to laugh, "Doesn't that mean you still owed six thousand seven hundred silver taels?"
Swally: "And that's exactly the reason why I needed to think of something else."
Big G: "Since you are a thief why wouldn't you steal it?"
Swally: "You think just because I am a thief I would steal from anybody?"
Big G: "So you are picky?"
Swally: "I am extremely picky, I only steal from corrupt officials, dirty businessmen, bandits, and it has to be the right person and the right place."
Big G: "So you are a thief who steals from thieves?"
Swally: "Correct, I call it black eat black."
Big G: "So your new idea involved robbing The Ants?"
Swally: "Yes! I heard that they just finished a big job, so I asked to borrow ten thousand silver taels. "
Big G: "Did they promise to give it to you?"
Swally: "They did promise to, but there was one condition."
Big G: "What was the condition?"
Swally: "They wanted me to sleep in a coffin, and bury it in the ground for two days, then see if I was dead or not."
Big G: "Hadn't you already done that before?"
Swally: "I have yes, but it wasn't the most comfortable experience."
Big G: "So you didn't agree to the terms."
Swally: "I did agree, because out of all the debts you can have, I can't have gambling debts."
Big G: "You promised them and then didn't keep your promise, so now they are chasing you?"
Swally: "That is correct."
Big G: "What is your name?"
Swally: "Swallow Seven, but my friends call me Swally."
Big G: "Do you have six brothers and sisters?"
Swally: "Nope."
Big G: "If you weren't the seventh child then why is your name Swallow Seven?"
Swally: "Because I have already died seven times."
Big G: "If you die again, then won't they have to call you Swallow Eight?"
Swally: "Swallow Seven is pretty good, I don't want to have to change it," he replied laughing.
Big G suddenly bent over laughing, he was laughing so hard that there was even some tears and snot, pointing at him he said: "You are not a freak, but you are definitely the king of bragging."
Swally: "You don't believe me?"
Big G: "I don't believe a word of it, not even a three year old would believe anything you said."
Swally: "I wasn't planning on telling the truth, because I know that lies are often easier to believe than the truth," he replied with a sigh.
Big G laughed, "If everything you said is true then I will gladly crawl around on the floor...."
"Start crawling then."
The sound was sharp and piercing, it wasn't loud, but it made your ears numb.
Big G raised his head and saw a figure; someone was standing on the windowsill, but he was shorter than the window.
The window was at most three and a half feet tall.
His clothes were glistening gold. If it wasn't for facial hair and wrinkles around the corner of his eyes, anybody would easily have mistaken him for a five or six year old child.
Big G was startled, and finally let out a long sigh, “You must be the Golden Ant?”
Golden Ant: “That’s right, so I can guarantee that everything he said is true, all of it.”
Big G sighed again, “Since the Golden Ant is here, where is the Silver Ant?” he said with a forced smile.
Before he finished his sentence, there was another person standing on the window sill. This person was a little taller than the Golden Ant, but, at most by only two or three inches.
His clothes were glistening silver and he was wearing a silver mask. He looked just like a little monster made out of silver, it was creepy beyond words.
Even Big G felt like his hair was standing on end, “I bet the Red Ant is definitely going to be dressed in red,” he murmured.
“You guessed right,” a charming voice replied laughing.
The laugh was sharp and flirtatious. You didn’t hear such a beautiful laugh very often. I am sure you can image how beautiful a person with a laugh like that would be.
The Red Ant was definitely beautiful.
You would think that most midgets would have a disfigured body, but she was an exception.
She was wearing tight red clothes, and she was thin where she needed to be thin, and definitely plump in all the right places. She had a perfectly oval face, enticing eyebrows, and eyes like fresh spring water. Such a sweet, irresistible smile, if only you could make her twice as big, she would be an exquisite beauty for sure.
If only she could double her size, even a man like Big G would most likely commit crimes for her. Even without doubling her size, Big G couldn’t stop staring. She glanced sideways at big G with her vibrant gaze, “your eyes are misbehaving,” she said, smiling enchantingly.
“I have never been well behaved, from my head to toes, there is not a well behaved part on my body,” Big G sighed.
“So you are a horny fool,” the Red Ant chuckled.
Big G: “Well not entirely, but more or less, it's just too bad that…”
The Red Ant’s smile suddenly vanished, “What's too bad?”
Big G: “It's too bad people can't shrink, otherwise I would want to become the Yellow Ant. ”
Biting her lips, the Red Ant smiled sweetly, “You dare to flirt with me, you are very bold, aren’t you afraid that my husband will be jealous?”
“Who is your husband? The White Ant?… I heard the White Ant can fly,” Big G replied.
“You guessed right again, aren’t you a little genius,” she smiled charmingly.
Amongst laughter like silver bells, something suddenly flew in threw the window.
No matter how you were watching this situation, you would never have guessed that this thing was a person. Buoyant as the distant clouds, white like snowflakes, as if floating through the sky, he suddenly flew over Big G’s head.
All Big G felt was a breeze by his head, and if he hadn’t dodged quickly, his head might not still be attached to his body.
With a swoosh, the thing flew back.
This couldn't be a person, how could someone be so agile.
But as chance would have it, it was a person, a person dressed white as snow. With big, wide sleeves, it seemed like he had wings. But he was small and skinny, not even three and a half feet tall, and not even a foot wide. If he was measured on a scale, he certainly wouldn’t be that much heavier than a rabbit.
If he wasn’t so tiny, how could he have mastered such Qinggong.
Big G sighed again, “So the White Ant can fly,” he muttered.
Swally: “The White Ant’s Qingong is the best in the world, the Red Ant has countless flying weapons, the Gold Ant is a master of striking and the sword, and the Silver Ant is invulnerable. I already told you, they each posses a very special kind of kung fu, do you believe me now?”
“Do you want me to crawl now, or can I crawl around for you later? ” Big G was smiling bitterly.
“Its best to start crawling now, crawl out the door so you won’t need to be carried out,” the White Ant said coldly.
“See, I told you he would be jealous, do you believe me now?” the Red Ant chuckled.
“Our affairs are no concern of yours, it is best you crawl out of here,” the Gold Ant said.
Big G: “I don’t know how to crawl, its best you come and teach me.”
Red Ant: “We only brought one coffin, looks like we should have brought three.”
Big G: “You even brought a coffin? Do you really plan on nailing him inside?”
Gold Ant: “I already told you, every word he said is true.”
Swally suddenly patted Big G on the shoulder, “I started this trouble, there is no need for you to play the hero and get involved in other people’s business.”
Red Ant: “That’s right, you have already died seven times anyway, what does it matter if you die one more time.”
Swally: “This is not my house, if I am going to die, I can’t die here.”
White Ant: “Then go outside.”
Swally patted his clothes, smiling, “Go out, sure… you two, if I don’t die for good this time, I am definitely going to come back and have a drink with you both.”
“Wait.” Dash suddenly said, he had been sleeping on the bed, motionless the whole time.
Gold Ant: “Wait for what?”
Dash: “Do you know where we are?”
“I know it's your pig pen,” the Red Ant chuckled.
Dash: “If this is a pig pen, then I am the King Pig, whoever comes here, has to listen to me.”
“What are you going to do?” the Gold Ant replied angrily.
Dash: “I want Swally to stay and have a drink with me, it is not easy to find someone who can drink upside down, so why would I let him sleep in a coffin?”
“You feel like moving?” Big G asked with a smile.
Dash: “These Ants bite, I am going to have to move.”
Big G: “What's the plan?”
Dash: “I will take the Red Ant, you take the white one.”
× × ×
Dash doesn’t move, but when he moves, it is terrifying.
As soon as he finished speaking, he sprang off the bed, rushing forward in a flash. It wasn't just himself that came rushing forward, his blanket came flying as well. He targeted the Red Ant. The Red Ant didn’t see him coming, all she saw was a filthy, dark blanket whirling around her. With one turn she had already released thirty to forty different concealed throwing weapons of various colors. Some came out with deathly speed, some bounced off each other and changed directions mid air, and some swerved around. Since she was so small, the projectiles were also tiny. The mini throwing weapons whistled through the air, impossible to dodge.
But she forgot one thing.
Cotton blankets can’t die.
Although she was a deadly master of throwing weapons, it was of no use; with a series of muffled puffs, all of the projectiles hit the cotton blanket. The blanket was basically covered in oil, pork, duck, chicken grease and sesame oil. It was so slippery and tough that even a longbow or crossbow might not be able to pierce it, let alone tiny projectiles.
By the time the Red Ant realized her mistake, she was swept back, and the filthy blanket had her wrapped like an ominous tornado.
Dash doesn’t move, nobody thought he could move that fast.
By the time the Red Ant smelt the strange, greasy odor, she was already wrapped inside the blanket.
If she was a little bigger, Dash probably couldn't have wrapped her in a blanket; however, she was just too small, with two swirls of his hand, she was already wrapped like a sticky rice dumpling.
Dash didn't stop moving. He heard a sound behind him, and the White Ant was flying at him. Dash was fast, but not as fast as the flying White Ant.
In the blink of an eye, the White Ant was flying at him.
Dash wanted the White Ant to chase him, because he knew he would never be able to catch him. As soon as the White Ant was close, he suddenly stopped, turned, and threw him the rolled blanket.
His beloved wife was wrapped inside, the White Ant's only option was to catch the blanket roll.
The rolled up cotton blanket was twice his size, and double his weight. As soon as he caught the blanket, he started falling down. Dash circled around his back, and locked his acupuncture points with ease.
The prominent veins on the White Ant's little face were bulging, he was glaring at Dash. Even his eyes seemed like they were about to pop out.
Dash stopped moving, "Are you going to be a sore loser? Because I didn't use real kung fu. Well let me tell you, using real kung fu is too easy. Whenever I fight, I don't use real kung fu."
The White Ant was furious, it looked like he was about to vomit blood.
It did seem that Dash didn't actually know kung fu, that it was just a fluke. But if his kung fu wasn't first-class, how could he have been so lucky? How could he have timed everything so perfectly with such precision?
You would definitely have to know some kung fu, at least have an understanding of authentic martial arts.
Dash doesn't move, but when he does, it is amazing.
On the other side of the room, Big G had the Gold Ant grasping for breath, his array of powerful punches had him cornered.
Swally was circling the Silver Ant.
Even though the Silver Ant was relatively bigger, his kung fu skill of invulnerability made him slow.
The faster Swally circled him, the more he slowed down.
Suddenly, Swally took off his hat, and capped it on his head. Big hat, small head, it covered his whole head, he couldn't see anything.
Swally stuck out his foot and he tripped over it. With a loud thump he hit the ground, he had been wearing silver armor, weighing him down, it wasn't so easy to get up again.
He reached for the hat covering his head, but he was already being held down by something very heavy. It was Swally, sitting on him, "This stool isn't bad, too bad it's a little small," he laughed jokingly.
And the Gold Ant? He was already grasping for air, his breathing became even more agitated, and without Big G landing the final punch, he passed out, foaming at the mouth.
"I think this guy has epilepsy, my bad," Big G sighed again.
Dash: "I said that you get the White Ant, didn't you hear me?"
"Say what you want, I will fight who I want. I couldn't catch the White Ant and he had to chase you, so I picked the Gold Ant. I am definitely bigger than him anyway, obviously I am stronger. Based on strength alone, I knew I had him," Big G replied laughing.
Dash sighed, "Never thought you would be the type to take advantage of people," he muttered.
Big G: "And I never thought your cotton blanket could be so useful. If I ever find someone who wants to master the art of secret throwing weapons, I am definitely going to tell him to eat lots of greasy chicken on his bed."
Dash: "Chicken is not greasy enough, duck is better."
"I never thought I would meet two people such as yourselves, looks like my rotten luck has just about ran its course," Swally said with a long sigh.
Big G smiled: "That's because you really are a freak, not the king of boasting."
Swally: "You two were willing to help me just because I was telling the truth?"
Big G: "Because you can drink upside down."
"Well if I didn't first see you hanging upside down, would I have said all that?" Swally laughed.
With another sigh he added, "Actually there is something else I want to say, but am not sure if I should say it or not."
Dash: "Do you want to thank me?"
"I really don't know how to thank you," Swally exhaled.
Dash: "If you really want to thank me, there is something you can do."
Swally: "What's that?"
Dash: "Carry me back to the bed, I am too lazy to move."
(3)
To most people, "Prosperity Villa" wouldn't be considered an interesting place, there really wasn't anything appealing there.
The strange thing was, Swally was the same as Big G, upon arriving, they never wanted to leave.
It wasn't because they had nowhere else to go, but because...
Because why? They themselves were not exactly sure.
Amongst certain people, there seems to be a kind of attraction that is hard to explain. Just like a magnet and metal, as soon as they meet, they are stuck together.
As long as they were together they felt happy. Even if they had to sleep on the floor, and miss a couple of meals, even if the sky came falling down, they wouldn't care.
There was only a few things in the world they couldn't stand, with one of them being tears.
Even though the Red Ant was small, the amount of tears she shed was anything but small.
Big G suddenly realized that the size of a women wasn't directly connected to the amount of tears she could cry. It seemed that the smaller the women, the more tears there were.
When it comes to women, things are not always as they appear.
The fatter they are, the less they eat; the uglier they are, the more games they play; the older they are, the thicker the makeup; the more clothes they have, the less they wear.
"Ah, women sure are strange creatures," Big G sighed. The Red Ant had been crying nonstop. He had to leave, couldn't handle it anymore.
Swally stopped him from leaving.
Dash was already lying down, sleeping with his head buried. He wouldn't wake up even if someone was dying.
Swally pulled Big G to the side, "If you leave, what am I supposed to do with these four people?"
Big G: "This is your problem, not mine."
Swally: "But if it wasn't for your help, I wouldn't have been able to subdue them. If I wasn't able to overpower them, how would I be in this predicament?"
Big G stared blankly.
Swally was worried he hadn't explained the situation clearly, "If you two didn't help me, they would have caught me, worst case scenario I would have died again, if I was already dead, I wouldn't have anything to worry about. But now, I can't kill them, and I can't let them go. What should I do?"
The more clearly he explained the situation the more confused Big G became.
Dash suddenly poked his head out of his blanket, "I have an idea," he laughed.
"Why didn't you say something sooner," Swally moaned.
Dash: "Since you can't kill them, and you can't let them go, why don't you keep them here, you can take care of them for the rest of their lives."
Big G clapped his hands, laughing, "That is a great idea! They are so small anyway, it's not like they can eat very much."
The Red Ant stopped crying, "Each day, all I need to eat is a small bowl of rice mixed with shredded pearls, with a little bit of sea food, and a few peach slices. If you don't have any peaches, honey-dew is ok."
"Rice and shredded pearls? Sea food? Peaches?... That's easy," Swally muttered with a straight face.
He just turned and walked away.
Big G: "Where are you going?"
Swally: "Going to find that coffin, lie down, and find someone to bury it. Much less work then looking for shredded pearls and peaches."
"Looks like we are going to have to let them go in order to save you. That is easier than trying to find another person who can drink upside down," Big G replied with a sigh.
Before he finished speaking he had walked over and released The Ants acupuncture points.
They came suddenly, but left slowly.
The three of them watched them leave. They turned towards one another, just looking at each other.
Big G: "You had already decided to let them go didn't you?"
Swally: "Oh?"
Big G: "But, you didn't want to bring it up, because we helped subdue them. You were worried we wouldn't want to let them go, but actually..."
Swally: "Actually you wanted to let them go to, no?"
The three of them just sat there looking at each other, followed by a burst of laughter.
Big G: "Looks like letting people go is easier than killing them, feels much better too."
Swally: "So true, if we killed them, we wouldn't be so happy right now."
Dash: "But we let them go, what if they hurt someone else, that would be sad."
Big G shook his head, "No way, they are not that bad. Even if they had done some horrible things in the past, I am sure this will have changed them," he proclaimed loudly.
Winking, he lowered his voice, "Even if they were bad ants, after hearing what I said, they will certainly be too ashamed to not change their ways."
Swally: "Do you think they heard you?"
Dash: "Of course, this guy is so loud even a deaf person 10 miles away would hear him."
"True, I have always had a strong voice. People used to call me a natural singer with a golden voice, wait till I am in a good mood, I will sing you a thing or two," Big G replied laughing.
"If you must sing, please wait until I am sleeping," Dash remarked.
He buried his head under his blanket again, "As long as I am asleep, even if you step on a chicken's throat I am not going to wake up."
That's just the way they were. They had a very special way of doing things.
Sometimes they got things right, sometimes they made mistakes.
But, no matter what they did, they wouldn't get their hands bloody or live with regrets.
Their actions not only made themselves happy, but would also bring joy to others.
Note:
1. Big G: “It's too bad people can't shrink, otherwise I would want to become a yellow ant. ” Yellow has sexual connotations in Chinese.
The Optimistic Heroes
Chapter 2
Swally and the Ants
(1)
With the likes of Big G and Dash, what they could accomplish together was already enough to leave most people speechless... Then there was Swally.
The things Swally did by himself were more amazing than anything three hundred random people combined were capable of doing. So what happened when you added Big G to the mix? And then added Dash?
Fate just had to throw the three of them together. What could be done?
(2)
It wasn't like Big G and Dash were poor every day, all the time. Occasionally, there would be times when they weren't poor. The thing was, no one knew when they were going to be poor, and there certainly wasn't anyone who knew where their money came from.
They themselves were not even sure.
Their money always came unexpectedly, they themselves even thought it was a little absurd at times. This could also be due to the fact that their spending habits were even more absurd.
Fall was approaching. The trees in the back garden of Prosperity Villa were suddenly full of big, juicy pears. If you picked them all it was enough to fill dozens of baskets. If you sold them all, it would be about 20 to 30 silver taels worth.
The pears grew on the trees all by themselves. People would ask about the price, and then pick them all by themselves. During the whole process, they didn't have to lift a finger.
This money more or less just fell from the sky. Of course this was a reason to celebrate. To celebrate, obviously you needed to have some alcohol. If you had some alcohol, well you definitely needed some good meat as well. Dash had principles: out of nice clothes, gambling, whoring, and eating, food was the most practical expense, and also the thing he enjoyed most.
To start, he always ate lying down: sleep eating. When he got excited about eating he would even sit up to eat. If he was tired from eating, he would lie down, to continue his eating lying down.
His bed was greasier than the kitchen table. Wherever you put your hand, you could always find a piece or two of leftover meat, a few bones that could still be nibbled on.
Big G wasn't necessarily a clean person, but he wouldn't dare to sleep on Dash's bed, he preferred the floor.
Dash was happy to have the bed to himself. This bed was not only where he slept, it was also his living room, his garden, and his table.
Even more amazing was when he drank on his bed. Lying down, he would point the bottle at his mouth and glug-glug, with one swig not a drop was spilt anywhere.
Big G was pretty impressed with this skill. He also wanted to try drinking while lying down, but he hesitated, and couldn't help but ask, "Can you really get it all down when you are already lying down?"
Dash: "Of course."
Big G: "Won't it squirt out of your nose?"
Dash: "No way, even if you were hanging upside down, it wouldn't squirt out of your nose."
Big G: "How would you know?"
Dash: "I have tried it."
Big G just laughed, "You are too lazy to even sit up, how would you have been hanging upside down?"
Dash: "If you don't believe me then why don't you try it yourself?"
So Big G hung himself upside down and pointed the bottle towards his mouth. He started to drink slowly, after just two swigs, it started to squirt out of his nose.
At this very moment, he saw Swally—he saw Swally's feet first.
Swally's feet were like most people's feet, but his boots were extraordinary.
His boots were made of calf leather, with exquisite stitching, and a decorative flower pattern. They were in no way inferior to the royal boots worn by the lords beyond the Great Wall.
This wasn't in itself strange.
The strange thing was that these boots had everything, everything except soles.
His clothes had been magnificent, very well fitted; but now, they were worn and tattered, without a single piece of the original garment intact.
Only the cap on his head was definitely a nice hat.
He wasn't very tall, but his arms and legs were quite long.
He had an elegant face, even a little feminine. Big eyes, a small mouth, with two dimples when he smiled. But when he wasn't smiling, his face suddenly become cold as ice; pallid, to the point of scaring people away.
His clothes appeared to have been a light greenish-blue, but now they were a patchy mix of red and yellow.
The yellow was naturally mud, but what about the red?
Could it be blood?
The two of them had been enjoying a nice drink at home, when suddenly a person like this came charging in. That was certainly enough to startle most people.
But Dash was practically sleeping and Big G was hanging upside down. They didn't really notice him at first.
If you had walked into a room and seen a person sleep drinking, and the other person trying to drink hanging upside down. You would probably think that you had walked into a mental institute by mistake. Even if you weren't scared away, you would at least find it a little creepy.
But this person didn't appear shocked at all. This was Swally: as if he felt that hanging upside down and drinking was quite normal, that drinking while sitting was strange.
Big G's feet were hooked around the roof beams.
With a sudden tumble through the air, Swally also hooked his feet onto the roof beams. Facing Big G as if this would be the best way to carry on their conversation.
But he didn't say anything.
Big G found him amusing, he squinted his eyes making a funny face.
Swally made a funny face right back.
Big G: "How's it going."
Swally: "Good."
"Want a drink?" Big G asked as he rolled his eyes.
Swally: "Sure."
Big G passed him the bottle. He was hoping to see what alcohol dripping out of this person's nose would look like.
Who knew that this person could drink! Glug-glug, with one swig half the bottle was gone, without a drop being spilt.
Big G stared blankly, "Have you drank like this before?"
Swally: "A few times."
With sudden laughter, Big G explained: "I wanted to see if I could drink hanging upside down."
If a person had tried something like this before, there probably wasn't much that he hadn't tried.
Big G couldn't help but laugh, "What else have you tried before?"
Swally: "I have pretty much tried anything that you can think of."
"Is there anything in the world that is more uncomfortable than drinking upside down?" Big G replied laughing.
Swally: "A few things."
Big G: "Like what? What is the most painful?"
Swally: "Nailed shut in a coffin and buried in the ground was the worst."
"You tried that too?" Big G was staring at him with his eyes wide open.
Swally: "Well not that many times, just twice."
Big G suddenly somersaulted down through the air, and stared at him.
Swally had a straight face.
After a long while, Big G finally sighed, "If you are not the king of boasting then you are certainly a strange kind of freak."
"He is a freak." Dash said all of a sudden.
Swally just laughed, "The feeling is mutual."
Big G clasped his hands laughing loudly, "Not bad, not bad, we are all freaks, otherwise we all wouldn't be here."
"The first time I came here I wanted to rob the place, what about you?" Big G asked right away.
Swally: "I am not interested in becoming a robber, because, I already am."
Big G looked him up and down real good. He couldn't help but smile and said, "A thief like you, is certain to be a stupid thief."
Swally: "Not stupid, I have just had some bad luck."
Big G: "Bad luck?"
"If it wasn't for rotten luck, how could I have ended up charging in here?" Swally sighed.
Big G: "True, what exactly are you doing here?"
Swally: "I am not doing anything, I just need a place to hide."
Big G: "Why are you hiding?"
Swally: "Because people want to nail me inside a coffin and bury me."
Big G: "Who is it this time?"
Swally: "The Ants."
Big G's mouth dropped open, his jaw almost fell off, "You... ... What did you say?"
Swally: "I said The Ants."
Big G: "Ants?"
He suddenly bent over with laughter, "If you are afraid of ants, you sure are courageous," he managed to say despite having troubles breathing.
Sighing, Swally just shook his head, "Looks like you don't get out much, you don't even know who The Ants are."
Big G: "When I was three I knew what ants were."
Swally: "What?"
Big G: "Ants are very very small little insects that crawl around on the ground. There are a bunch on Dash's bed, I can catch a few and show you what they are."
Swally: "I am not talking about this kind of ants, they are people."
Big G stared blankly, "People, ants are people?"
Swally: "It is four people, the Ant King and his little entourage of ants."
Big G: "Oh?"
Swally: "These four people, one is called the Golden Ant, one is the called the Silver Ant, and there is the Red Ant, and the last one is called the White Ant."
Big G couldn't help but laugh, "Since there is a red and white ant, shouldn't there be a black ant as well?"
Swally: "There was one actually, but he is already dead."
Big G blinked, "Since they are clearly people, why are they called The Ants?"
Swally: "Lots of people have nicknames."
Big G: "If you are going to have a nickname, you should at least pick something awe-inspiring, like 'The Winged Tiger,' or 'Golden Lion,' you can have any nickname you want. Why would you want to be called an ant?"
Swally: "Because they are all really small, they are all midgets."
The more Big G listened the more outrageous it sounded. He couldn't stop laughing, "So what is so scary about midgets?"
Swally: "These midgets are not only scary, they are extremely dangerous. In fact, they are probably some of the most dangerous people in the world."
Big G: "Oh? What makes them so dangerous?"
Swally: "They each possess a very special kind of kung Fu, even the top master from the Emei sect was killed by them."
Big G: "Since they are so terrifying, why did you provoke them?"
Swally was sighing... "Because I ran into some trouble with money, such rotten luck, in two weeks I lost more than fifteen rounds, I even had to sell the soles of my boots to pay back my gambling debts..."
"What?" Big G shouted. "You sold your soles to pay back gambling debt?"
Swally: "Correct."
Big G: "How much did you owe?"
Swally: "About seven to eight thousand."
Big G: "How much did you sell your soles for?"
Swally: "I sold my two soles for a total of thirteen hundred silver taels."
The more he talked the more absurd it sounded. Big G thought he might as well keep on listening to see what other nonsense would come out of his mouth. He was trying very hard not to laugh, "Doesn't that mean you still owed six thousand seven hundred silver taels?"
Swally: "And that's exactly the reason why I needed to think of something else."
Big G: "Since you are a thief why wouldn't you steal it?"
Swally: "You think just because I am a thief I would steal from anybody?"
Big G: "So you are picky?"
Swally: "I am extremely picky, I only steal from corrupt officials, dirty businessmen, bandits, and it has to be the right person and the right place."
Big G: "So you are a thief who steals from thieves?"
Swally: "Correct, I call it black eat black."
Big G: "So your new idea involved robbing The Ants?"
Swally: "Yes! I heard that they just finished a big job, so I asked to borrow ten thousand silver taels. "
Big G: "Did they promise to give it to you?"
Swally: "They did promise to, but there was one condition."
Big G: "What was the condition?"
Swally: "They wanted me to sleep in a coffin, and bury it in the ground for two days, then see if I was dead or not."
Big G: "Hadn't you already done that before?"
Swally: "I have yes, but it wasn't the most comfortable experience."
Big G: "So you didn't agree to the terms."
Swally: "I did agree, because out of all the debts you can have, I can't have gambling debts."
Big G: "You promised them and then didn't keep your promise, so now they are chasing you?"
Swally: "That is correct."
Big G: "What is your name?"
Swally: "Swallow Seven, but my friends call me Swally."
Big G: "Do you have six brothers and sisters?"
Swally: "Nope."
Big G: "If you weren't the seventh child then why is your name Swallow Seven?"
Swally: "Because I have already died seven times."
Big G: "If you die again, then won't they have to call you Swallow Eight?"
Swally: "Swallow Seven is pretty good, I don't want to have to change it," he replied laughing.
Big G suddenly bent over laughing, he was laughing so hard that there was even some tears and snot, pointing at him he said: "You are not a freak, but you are definitely the king of bragging."
Swally: "You don't believe me?"
Big G: "I don't believe a word of it, not even a three year old would believe anything you said."
Swally: "I wasn't planning on telling the truth, because I know that lies are often easier to believe than the truth," he replied with a sigh.
Big G laughed, "If everything you said is true then I will gladly crawl around on the floor...."
"Start crawling then."
The sound was sharp and piercing, it wasn't loud, but it made your ears numb.
Big G raised his head and saw a figure; someone was standing on the windowsill, but he was shorter than the window.
The window was at most three and a half feet tall.
His clothes were glistening gold. If it wasn't for facial hair and wrinkles around the corner of his eyes, anybody would easily have mistaken him for a five or six year old child.
Big G was startled, and finally let out a long sigh, “You must be the Golden Ant?”
Golden Ant: “That’s right, so I can guarantee that everything he said is true, all of it.”
Big G sighed again, “Since the Golden Ant is here, where is the Silver Ant?” he said with a forced smile.
Before he finished his sentence, there was another person standing on the window sill. This person was a little taller than the Golden Ant, but, at most by only two or three inches.
His clothes were glistening silver and he was wearing a silver mask. He looked just like a little monster made out of silver, it was creepy beyond words.
Even Big G felt like his hair was standing on end, “I bet the Red Ant is definitely going to be dressed in red,” he murmured.
“You guessed right,” a charming voice replied laughing.
The laugh was sharp and flirtatious. You didn’t hear such a beautiful laugh very often. I am sure you can image how beautiful a person with a laugh like that would be.
The Red Ant was definitely beautiful.
You would think that most midgets would have a disfigured body, but she was an exception.
She was wearing tight red clothes, and she was thin where she needed to be thin, and definitely plump in all the right places. She had a perfectly oval face, enticing eyebrows, and eyes like fresh spring water. Such a sweet, irresistible smile, if only you could make her twice as big, she would be an exquisite beauty for sure.
If only she could double her size, even a man like Big G would most likely commit crimes for her. Even without doubling her size, Big G couldn’t stop staring. She glanced sideways at big G with her vibrant gaze, “your eyes are misbehaving,” she said, smiling enchantingly.
“I have never been well behaved, from my head to toes, there is not a well behaved part on my body,” Big G sighed.
“So you are a horny fool,” the Red Ant chuckled.
Big G: “Well not entirely, but more or less, it's just too bad that…”
The Red Ant’s smile suddenly vanished, “What's too bad?”
Big G: “It's too bad people can't shrink, otherwise I would want to become the Yellow Ant. ”
Biting her lips, the Red Ant smiled sweetly, “You dare to flirt with me, you are very bold, aren’t you afraid that my husband will be jealous?”
“Who is your husband? The White Ant?… I heard the White Ant can fly,” Big G replied.
“You guessed right again, aren’t you a little genius,” she smiled charmingly.
Amongst laughter like silver bells, something suddenly flew in threw the window.
No matter how you were watching this situation, you would never have guessed that this thing was a person. Buoyant as the distant clouds, white like snowflakes, as if floating through the sky, he suddenly flew over Big G’s head.
All Big G felt was a breeze by his head, and if he hadn’t dodged quickly, his head might not still be attached to his body.
With a swoosh, the thing flew back.
This couldn't be a person, how could someone be so agile.
But as chance would have it, it was a person, a person dressed white as snow. With big, wide sleeves, it seemed like he had wings. But he was small and skinny, not even three and a half feet tall, and not even a foot wide. If he was measured on a scale, he certainly wouldn’t be that much heavier than a rabbit.
If he wasn’t so tiny, how could he have mastered such Qinggong.
Big G sighed again, “So the White Ant can fly,” he muttered.
Swally: “The White Ant’s Qingong is the best in the world, the Red Ant has countless flying weapons, the Gold Ant is a master of striking and the sword, and the Silver Ant is invulnerable. I already told you, they each posses a very special kind of kung fu, do you believe me now?”
“Do you want me to crawl now, or can I crawl around for you later? ” Big G was smiling bitterly.
“Its best to start crawling now, crawl out the door so you won’t need to be carried out,” the White Ant said coldly.
“See, I told you he would be jealous, do you believe me now?” the Red Ant chuckled.
“Our affairs are no concern of yours, it is best you crawl out of here,” the Gold Ant said.
Big G: “I don’t know how to crawl, its best you come and teach me.”
Red Ant: “We only brought one coffin, looks like we should have brought three.”
Big G: “You even brought a coffin? Do you really plan on nailing him inside?”
Gold Ant: “I already told you, every word he said is true.”
Swally suddenly patted Big G on the shoulder, “I started this trouble, there is no need for you to play the hero and get involved in other people’s business.”
Red Ant: “That’s right, you have already died seven times anyway, what does it matter if you die one more time.”
Swally: “This is not my house, if I am going to die, I can’t die here.”
White Ant: “Then go outside.”
Swally patted his clothes, smiling, “Go out, sure… you two, if I don’t die for good this time, I am definitely going to come back and have a drink with you both.”
“Wait.” Dash suddenly said, he had been sleeping on the bed, motionless the whole time.
Gold Ant: “Wait for what?”
Dash: “Do you know where we are?”
“I know it's your pig pen,” the Red Ant chuckled.
Dash: “If this is a pig pen, then I am the King Pig, whoever comes here, has to listen to me.”
“What are you going to do?” the Gold Ant replied angrily.
Dash: “I want Swally to stay and have a drink with me, it is not easy to find someone who can drink upside down, so why would I let him sleep in a coffin?”
“You feel like moving?” Big G asked with a smile.
Dash: “These Ants bite, I am going to have to move.”
Big G: “What's the plan?”
Dash: “I will take the Red Ant, you take the white one.”
× × ×
Dash doesn’t move, but when he moves, it is terrifying.
As soon as he finished speaking, he sprang off the bed, rushing forward in a flash. It wasn't just himself that came rushing forward, his blanket came flying as well. He targeted the Red Ant. The Red Ant didn’t see him coming, all she saw was a filthy, dark blanket whirling around her. With one turn she had already released thirty to forty different concealed throwing weapons of various colors. Some came out with deathly speed, some bounced off each other and changed directions mid air, and some swerved around. Since she was so small, the projectiles were also tiny. The mini throwing weapons whistled through the air, impossible to dodge.
But she forgot one thing.
Cotton blankets can’t die.
Although she was a deadly master of throwing weapons, it was of no use; with a series of muffled puffs, all of the projectiles hit the cotton blanket. The blanket was basically covered in oil, pork, duck, chicken grease and sesame oil. It was so slippery and tough that even a longbow or crossbow might not be able to pierce it, let alone tiny projectiles.
By the time the Red Ant realized her mistake, she was swept back, and the filthy blanket had her wrapped like an ominous tornado.
Dash doesn’t move, nobody thought he could move that fast.
By the time the Red Ant smelt the strange, greasy odor, she was already wrapped inside the blanket.
If she was a little bigger, Dash probably couldn't have wrapped her in a blanket; however, she was just too small, with two swirls of his hand, she was already wrapped like a sticky rice dumpling.
Dash didn't stop moving. He heard a sound behind him, and the White Ant was flying at him. Dash was fast, but not as fast as the flying White Ant.
In the blink of an eye, the White Ant was flying at him.
Dash wanted the White Ant to chase him, because he knew he would never be able to catch him. As soon as the White Ant was close, he suddenly stopped, turned, and threw him the rolled blanket.
His beloved wife was wrapped inside, the White Ant's only option was to catch the blanket roll.
The rolled up cotton blanket was twice his size, and double his weight. As soon as he caught the blanket, he started falling down. Dash circled around his back, and locked his acupuncture points with ease.
The prominent veins on the White Ant's little face were bulging, he was glaring at Dash. Even his eyes seemed like they were about to pop out.
Dash stopped moving, "Are you going to be a sore loser? Because I didn't use real kung fu. Well let me tell you, using real kung fu is too easy. Whenever I fight, I don't use real kung fu."
The White Ant was furious, it looked like he was about to vomit blood.
It did seem that Dash didn't actually know kung fu, that it was just a fluke. But if his kung fu wasn't first-class, how could he have been so lucky? How could he have timed everything so perfectly with such precision?
You would definitely have to know some kung fu, at least have an understanding of authentic martial arts.
Dash doesn't move, but when he does, it is amazing.
On the other side of the room, Big G had the Gold Ant grasping for breath, his array of powerful punches had him cornered.
Swally was circling the Silver Ant.
Even though the Silver Ant was relatively bigger, his kung fu skill of invulnerability made him slow.
The faster Swally circled him, the more he slowed down.
Suddenly, Swally took off his hat, and capped it on his head. Big hat, small head, it covered his whole head, he couldn't see anything.
Swally stuck out his foot and he tripped over it. With a loud thump he hit the ground, he had been wearing silver armor, weighing him down, it wasn't so easy to get up again.
He reached for the hat covering his head, but he was already being held down by something very heavy. It was Swally, sitting on him, "This stool isn't bad, too bad it's a little small," he laughed jokingly.
And the Gold Ant? He was already grasping for air, his breathing became even more agitated, and without Big G landing the final punch, he passed out, foaming at the mouth.
"I think this guy has epilepsy, my bad," Big G sighed again.
Dash: "I said that you get the White Ant, didn't you hear me?"
"Say what you want, I will fight who I want. I couldn't catch the White Ant and he had to chase you, so I picked the Gold Ant. I am definitely bigger than him anyway, obviously I am stronger. Based on strength alone, I knew I had him," Big G replied laughing.
Dash sighed, "Never thought you would be the type to take advantage of people," he muttered.
Big G: "And I never thought your cotton blanket could be so useful. If I ever find someone who wants to master the art of secret throwing weapons, I am definitely going to tell him to eat lots of greasy chicken on his bed."
Dash: "Chicken is not greasy enough, duck is better."
"I never thought I would meet two people such as yourselves, looks like my rotten luck has just about ran its course," Swally said with a long sigh.
Big G smiled: "That's because you really are a freak, not the king of boasting."
Swally: "You two were willing to help me just because I was telling the truth?"
Big G: "Because you can drink upside down."
"Well if I didn't first see you hanging upside down, would I have said all that?" Swally laughed.
With another sigh he added, "Actually there is something else I want to say, but am not sure if I should say it or not."
Dash: "Do you want to thank me?"
"I really don't know how to thank you," Swally exhaled.
Dash: "If you really want to thank me, there is something you can do."
Swally: "What's that?"
Dash: "Carry me back to the bed, I am too lazy to move."
(3)
To most people, "Prosperity Villa" wouldn't be considered an interesting place, there really wasn't anything appealing there.
The strange thing was, Swally was the same as Big G, upon arriving, they never wanted to leave.
It wasn't because they had nowhere else to go, but because...
Because why? They themselves were not exactly sure.
Amongst certain people, there seems to be a kind of attraction that is hard to explain. Just like a magnet and metal, as soon as they meet, they are stuck together.
As long as they were together they felt happy. Even if they had to sleep on the floor, and miss a couple of meals, even if the sky came falling down, they wouldn't care.
There was only a few things in the world they couldn't stand, with one of them being tears.
Even though the Red Ant was small, the amount of tears she shed was anything but small.
Big G suddenly realized that the size of a women wasn't directly connected to the amount of tears she could cry. It seemed that the smaller the women, the more tears there were.
When it comes to women, things are not always as they appear.
The fatter they are, the less they eat; the uglier they are, the more games they play; the older they are, the thicker the makeup; the more clothes they have, the less they wear.
"Ah, women sure are strange creatures," Big G sighed. The Red Ant had been crying nonstop. He had to leave, couldn't handle it anymore.
Swally stopped him from leaving.
Dash was already lying down, sleeping with his head buried. He wouldn't wake up even if someone was dying.
Swally pulled Big G to the side, "If you leave, what am I supposed to do with these four people?"
Big G: "This is your problem, not mine."
Swally: "But if it wasn't for your help, I wouldn't have been able to subdue them. If I wasn't able to overpower them, how would I be in this predicament?"
Big G stared blankly.
Swally was worried he hadn't explained the situation clearly, "If you two didn't help me, they would have caught me, worst case scenario I would have died again, if I was already dead, I wouldn't have anything to worry about. But now, I can't kill them, and I can't let them go. What should I do?"
The more clearly he explained the situation the more confused Big G became.
Dash suddenly poked his head out of his blanket, "I have an idea," he laughed.
"Why didn't you say something sooner," Swally moaned.
Dash: "Since you can't kill them, and you can't let them go, why don't you keep them here, you can take care of them for the rest of their lives."
Big G clapped his hands, laughing, "That is a great idea! They are so small anyway, it's not like they can eat very much."
The Red Ant stopped crying, "Each day, all I need to eat is a small bowl of rice mixed with shredded pearls, with a little bit of sea food, and a few peach slices. If you don't have any peaches, honey-dew is ok."
"Rice and shredded pearls? Sea food? Peaches?... That's easy," Swally muttered with a straight face.
He just turned and walked away.
Big G: "Where are you going?"
Swally: "Going to find that coffin, lie down, and find someone to bury it. Much less work then looking for shredded pearls and peaches."
"Looks like we are going to have to let them go in order to save you. That is easier than trying to find another person who can drink upside down," Big G replied with a sigh.
Before he finished speaking he had walked over and released The Ants acupuncture points.
They came suddenly, but left slowly.
The three of them watched them leave. They turned towards one another, just looking at each other.
Big G: "You had already decided to let them go didn't you?"
Swally: "Oh?"
Big G: "But, you didn't want to bring it up, because we helped subdue them. You were worried we wouldn't want to let them go, but actually..."
Swally: "Actually you wanted to let them go to, no?"
The three of them just sat there looking at each other, followed by a burst of laughter.
Big G: "Looks like letting people go is easier than killing them, feels much better too."
Swally: "So true, if we killed them, we wouldn't be so happy right now."
Dash: "But we let them go, what if they hurt someone else, that would be sad."
Big G shook his head, "No way, they are not that bad. Even if they had done some horrible things in the past, I am sure this will have changed them," he proclaimed loudly.
Winking, he lowered his voice, "Even if they were bad ants, after hearing what I said, they will certainly be too ashamed to not change their ways."
Swally: "Do you think they heard you?"
Dash: "Of course, this guy is so loud even a deaf person 10 miles away would hear him."
"True, I have always had a strong voice. People used to call me a natural singer with a golden voice, wait till I am in a good mood, I will sing you a thing or two," Big G replied laughing.
"If you must sing, please wait until I am sleeping," Dash remarked.
He buried his head under his blanket again, "As long as I am asleep, even if you step on a chicken's throat I am not going to wake up."
That's just the way they were. They had a very special way of doing things.
Sometimes they got things right, sometimes they made mistakes.
But, no matter what they did, they wouldn't get their hands bloody or live with regrets.
Their actions not only made themselves happy, but would also bring joy to others.
Note:
1. Big G: “It's too bad people can't shrink, otherwise I would want to become a yellow ant. ” Yellow has sexual connotations in Chinese.
