V2, Chapter 14
The streets, the crowds, and inside the trains were filled up with students wearing their uniforms.
I repeated the days of going to Misaki’s house while acting as if I were going to the library. I’d have preferred to raise her at home instead, but Haruhito is there now. Honestly, concealing her in the house is too much of a pain, and even if I did so, Haruhito had already seen Misaki previously. I have no explanation ready for him in case he found out about the Shishikuibana.
It’s now September.
The seed which I obtained by exchanging Sari’s ovary had grown into a new Misaki above the pot waiting for its second awakening. It was fortunate that the ovary was in perfect condition. Receiving the seed, I told Erisa “You didn’t stop me this time, did you?” but she replied with a shocked expression, “It’s useless to do so anyway”.
I then planted the seed in Misaki’s cut open head and dripped some blood. I also begged Erisa to share with me Sari’s flesh so I would have more time to gaze at Misaki to my heart’s content instead of going out to search for a new corpse.
Aside from picking up her head in the cabin, I didn’t go back there a second time. Though, I was blessed to find the necessary tools to behead her set all in one place. The remainder of the body was left rotting due to microbes and enzyme.
I tried to brainwash Misaki once again.
I made her to forget about Isezaki for real this time.
And to not assault me.
To love me from the bottom of her heart.
As if I was praying, I repeated this imprinting as long as I was awake.
Right after the flower fell, I started releasing Misaki.
As I was cutting the root, her eyebrow started to quiver.
“You were protecting me and loving me? How gross. I can’t believe you’re approaching me like that. And hey, could you stop staring at me? You’re disgusting, give me a break!”
The second Misaki was a person who abused and criticized me for my looks and character. I already knew about her too-frank personality, but this time her filthy speech made her look like a different woman.
She just said every thought she had on her mind. She was just a mass of rudeness.
This was not the Misaki that I wanted to bring back.
An abrupt fire ignited in my head and before I realized it, I found myself thrusting the dagger knife I picked from the cabin into her neck.
The sharp edge pierced her throat making her unpleasant voice come to a halt.
Pulling out the knife, blood spilled onto the floor, and Misaki began to aimlessly walk inside the room until she eventually ran out of battery and collapsed on the floor. Unmoving.
The crafting tools she worked hard to make when she was still human were painted with her splattered blood, turning the interior room into some painting of gore.
When I noticed that Misaki stopped twitching, I was attacked by an intense regret.
I killed Misaki again. Not because I was defending myself, but only due to my uncontrolled emotions.
I’m going to need another seed from Erisa. Still, now that I already submitted Sari’s corpse, I don’t have any more measures left. If I lazed around, Misaki’s head will rot and worms would begin to grown in her head.
As I was troubled by this, but then an idea popped in my mind. It could be even described as a revelation.
I took Misaki to the bathroom and ripped off her abdomen with a carver.
[Admin: Wow, dude. Such love you have for her.]
Using a medical book that I found in her house as a reference, I kept on churning her insides while pushing my way through her pink organs, drenched by blood, and detached them until I attained what I was looking for.
The ovaries.
I heard from Erisa about the Shishikuibana’s constitution being similar to humans, but I was still delighted by figuring out that the same thing applies to the internal organs as well.
Without further delay, I brought the ovary with me to Erisa in the shop. She gave me a grim look when she saw it.
“I don’t mind if it’s just the ovary, but…” Erisa picked the genitalia I carried by her fingers.
“I’d like it if you told me its owner at least.”
When I remained silent to her sharp question, she made a sigh.
“I didn’t want to say this but let me go out of my way now. You know about Iruse Misaki’s body, I actually hired the Mogura to deliver it for me here. After some negotiation, they stepped back on taking the lower half.”
Erisa’s words cleared away the doubt I had from a while ago. She told me that she cut Misaki’s head at the construction site. However, I didn’t hear anything in the news mentioning the discovery of a headless lump of meat. That was of course because Erisa brought it with her.
“Most of her parts were crushed by the mountain of materials, but I was barely able to safely extract the ovary. Which I used to make the seed I offered you for the first time.”
I couldn’t blame her for what she did. Erisa wasn’t planning on murdering Misaki in the first place, it was the complete opposite that took place. Rather, she had the compassion to offer a piece of bread to the person who slapped her in the face… Although I was the one who received that piece of bread.
“As I thought. You were intending on reviving Misaki from the start.”
“Something you can see from my actions.”
“Even though she tried to kill you?.”
“I wanted to hear the reason she did that from her own mouth. What left me hesitating was the caution in me against whether she will perhaps assault me once I revive her, or the lack of will to waste a seed out of curiosity.”
I was about to ask her why she didn’t simply brainwash Misaki, but I decided to keep quiet.
I learned the hard way that brainwashing doesn’t always succeed. For Erisa who was well versed in the Shishikuibana, it’s quite possible that she already thought about such possibility.
“By your unexpected entry, Iruse Misaki took her shape once again. Perhaps if you didn’t show up, I would have handed the seed to somebody else,” saying that, Erisa took out a new seed from the vault.
“My misgiving is about you possibly holding this grand idea of this Iruse Misaki. Just like a painter who is hard to please, trying not to smash every piece that doesn’t suit your taste.”
[Admin: I think he just wants her not to hate him or want to kill him. Don’t think it’s every detail.]
Feeling as if she saw through my soul, I received the seed and excused myself from the shop.
Returning back to my room, I instantly beheaded the abusive Misaki and planted the seed.
Last time, I left Misaki’s corpse in the cabin for a long while. Not to mention her head being damaged, her brain that began rotting was surely the origin of the inferior growth which led to the revival of an ill-natured Misaki. But this time it’s okay, I can give birth to a pure, obedient one.
[Pr: Am I the only who is getting the feeling this is turning into some sort of twisted Hentai, without sex?]
Unfortunately, my wishful thinking was quickly betrayed.
The third Misaki was a child.
Staring at me with her vacant eyes, she repeatedly called “Ku~ya, Ku~ya” like an idiot who doesn’t remember anything aside from that name.
She didn’t change her words no matter how long I talked to her.
I couldn’t even check whether she’s possessing an affection towards me or not.
[Admin: Seriously? That’s what you’re worried about?]
I recalled the moment when she teased me saying, “Your appearance is that of a child while inside you are that of an old man.”
Isn’t it the opposite for you now?.. She didn’t reply to my retort.
Getting controlled by my irritation again, I struck the knife in her bare chest.
I dragged the dying Misaki to the bathroom, ripped open her belly and took out the ovary. Right next to me, the rotting headless corpse of the rude Misaki was releasing a concentrated stench.
After bringing the ovary with me to the shop, Erisa handed me the seed without speaking a word.
She didn’t attempt to convince me anymore.
Regarding the raising of the third body, I remained in Misaki’s house instead of returning home. I lost sight of my phone somewhere along the way, but that served more as a relief since I became out of range from any outside contact. I could finally focus completely on reviving Misaki.
Her parent’s long absence was also a cause for relief. I’m not sure whether they’re ignoring their daughter, or they just blindly believed in her.
I started sleeping during the day and waking up in the dusk to go wander around the town searching for new flesh.
Business district, riverbed, railways and dump sites.
With the eyes of a predator, I visited every possible place where I could find a corpse lying on the ground. In case I didn’t find anything, I would proceed to the gathering spots of vagrants or to the prostitution quarters. I either drew them in using money or approached a mature prostitute while wearing the mask of a customer.
“This is not a dump site! You’re troubling me by bringing this low-quality flesh every single day. Give me a break!”
I listened to Erisa’s complaints, however, to me, the quality of the flesh was not important. What really mattered was collecting a large amount in a short time.
In the process of raising the Shishikuibana, I noticed that its rate of development is related to the amount of meat I feed it. The more flesh I offer it, the quicker the Shishikuibana matures. And so, I continued to collect more flesh whilst hearing out Erisa’s complaints every time.
Misaki’s house became overflowing from the stink of her headless bodies and the rotting flesh which she had yet to eat. Throwing away the unnecessary parts in a garbage site was out of the question. The entire house got polluted by the extreme hellish miasma, though for me who was immersed in raising up Misaki forgetting to eat and sleep, it didn’t really matter. I poured all of my time and labor in bringing her up. Exactly as Erisa mentioned, I kept on doing so for the sake of making my ideal Misaki.
However, seeming to be ridiculing my hard work, the more I redid the resuscitation process, the more Misaki kept swaying away from being human. The outward appearance was indeed consistent, but her inside was empty.
Up from the fourth try, she didn’t emit the smallest voice anymore and remained absent-mindedly gaping at my face with her vacant eyes. It was even suspicious if she recognized me or not.
Cutting the root didn’t result in the least change of emotions on her face.
I killed Misaki out of disappointment and planted the seed in her skull again.
Raising Misaki then killing her to raise her again and kill her.
My life became the embodiment of this repetition.
Who cares about college entry exams anyway.
Continuing to endlessly construct my elaborate doll in the depths of hell, I expected Misaki to smile to me one day. I am a miserable Pygmalion who was rescued by nobody. The goddess didn’t seem to be descending upon me anytime soon.
I eventually lost sight of my purpose. Am I killing Misaki in order to revive her, or am I reviving her in order to kill her? I couldn’t distinguish between them anymore.
“You look too pale, are you eating well?”
When I was receiving the seed for the XX time, Erisa pointed to my health condition, only to get an “I’m fine” as a reply from me. But in the actuality, my body stopped accepting food. I wonder if my mental condition affected my health. No matter what I ate, it just disappears as if I swallowed a dumpling, leaving only an uncomfortable feeling behind.
“You need to eat something of high nutrition, else you will be ruined. If you get too worked about reviving Iruse Misaki, you will end up just like her.”
If it’s about high nutrition food then I literally have a mountain of it in Misaki’s house. However, there’s no way for me to resort to eating human flesh.
[Admin: ….]
I am a human, not a Shishikuibana.
I am a human, no matter how much I starve, I wouldn’t resort to eating human flesh.
I am a human, I wish for my beloved person to come back.
I am a human, if I fail, I’m going to have to kill Misaki again.
I am a human, I make use of this fact to draw near humanity even more.
I am a human, my left arm that got bitten by the vagrant I attacked is throbbing.
I am a human, I murder people in order to acquire flesh.
I am a human, somehow using the knife became difficult.
I am a human, I rip off Misaki’s abdomen in order to acquire the seed.
I am a human, I would never eat that rotten flesh.
I am a human, wait, where did my left arm go again?
[Pr: Wait, what?]
[Admin: reminds me of that dream he had, *hint hint*.]
*****
Erisa has said it once.
The end abruptly knocks on the doors, without any previous notice or restraint.
In my case, rather than knocking, it rang the bell.
The season turned into winter.
That faint resounding sound stirred up my heart and drove me out of the abyss of despair.
It’s been three months since I decided to stay in Misaki’s house and nobody had visited in that period.
Misaki’s parents wouldn’t ring the bell.
Misaki’s friends wouldn’t violently strike the door.
The neighbors wouldn’t tear down the lock.
The bill collector wouldn’t step in the house without permission. Newspaper or religious employees wouldn’t scream, “It stinks! What’s this smell?!” in the corridor of the first floor. A door-to-door salesman wouldn’t go up the stairs.
Countless possibilities emerged and disappeared in my mind. My brain changed into a crucible of madness and I went all rigid in Misaki’s room while waiting for the end to show up.
The intruder who walked up the stairs opened the door with no hesitation.
“I started thinking of an excuse to make if I struck the wrong house, but…”
A familiar voice of a well-known person.
The last person I was expecting to find me in this place.
“It seems there was no need to worry about that.”
Haruhito looked down on me who was lying on the floor.
His face felt somehow grieved.
“Finally, when I thought I found you, things turned out like this. To make the matter even worse, it was you who turned this house into a mess”
“Haruhito, I–”
“You can still talk? That means you’re still in your last moments.”
Haruhito say a word about the Misaki above the pot.
I tried standing up, but all I could do at that time was lifting my head.
It’s only natural. After all, I have already lost my arms and legs.
[Pr: Worry not, you did not miss anything, I’m just as confused as you]
My insides are feeling heavy and muddled similar to melting lead.
“I’ll scold you later. Now we’re going back.”
Haruhito displayed a rare tender expression filled with his warmth toward me.
I just recalled that he made the same face in the morning when I was informed of my mother’s death. He interrupted my question back then saying, “I’ll explain things for you later.”
Leaving that verbal promise unprotected, I still don’t know the reason for my mother’s death even until now.
Haruhito reached his hands to my back and lifted me up.
BON!
I fell to the floor.
But I wonder why.
My eyes still reflect my torso held in his hands.
“Dammit! Am I late!?”
Late from what? I attempted to ask him, but I couldn’t let out my voice.
My field of vision gradually got darker.
What’s this?
What’s going on?
What’s happening to me?
*****
Someone is singing.
Covered by warmth, I perked my ears to the singing voice.
I was dozing off on someone’s chest.
It doesn’t look like I’m in Misaki’s room.
Is it Haruhito who’s embracing me like this?
No. This is another level of softness and warmth. A hug wrapping up my very soul.
Why am I completely oblivious as to why I ended up in this place?
I feel like something grave had occurred, but I don’t remember anything besides that.
I moved my neck and noticed the figure of a girl and boy standing on the opposite path.
They were both dressed in the uniform of a school I was attending this last spring.
The boy had an angry expression while the girl seemed to be in the depth of sadness, and they were both shedding floods of tears.
I wonder who they are.
I can somehow recall their faces, yet I can’t remember their names.
The girl moved her lips. Even though I could tell what she’s saying, her voice didn’t reach my ears as if we were separated by a thick wall of glass.
The singing voice is still on-going.
Swaying like a wave.
Swiftly flowing like a clear stream.
Before I realized it, my surroundings changed into a purplish, red field full of blooming flowers.
Flowers that don’t close up when their petals begin to get blown off and get shaken by the breeze.
The girl and the boy disappeared from my view.
The person hugging me kept singing while walking in the field.
I raised my head trying to confirm that person’s face but, I couldn’t see well due to the lighting.
Making our way out of the field, we arrived at a deserted land.
The idyllic ambiance was nowhere to be found, but the dazzling lights above our heads didn’t show any sign of dimming.
Don’t be scared. It’s not scary. You are fine, you’re okay.
Everything will turn out well once you open your eyes again.
That’s why, take a little break now.
It took me quite a bit of time to recognize that the song’s lyrics were directed to persuade me.
A warm drop fell on my cheek.
This person is crying.
I’m sorry, Kuuya.
I finally realized that the owner of that sorrowful voice was my mother.
Suddenly the sky was got cloudy and the light started weakening allowing me to see my mother’s face.
Aah, that’s right. It was this face. I wonder why I forgot about my her face until now.
Strangely enough, it wasn’t like I didn’t recall it, but I felt that remembering it would only bring me a form of regret.
Sorry.
My mother repeated the same phrase.
Vaguely wondering why my mother was apologizing and why she pushing something cool onto my neck.
A sharp sensation ran through my nape making my consciousness sink into the depth of the darkness.
V2, Chapter 14
The streets, the crowds, and inside the trains were filled up with students wearing their uniforms.
I repeated the days of going to Misaki’s house while acting as if I were going to the library. I’d have preferred to raise her at home instead, but Haruhito is there now. Honestly, concealing her in the house is too much of a pain, and even if I did so, Haruhito had already seen Misaki previously. I have no explanation ready for him in case he found out about the Shishikuibana.
It’s now September.
The seed which I obtained by exchanging Sari’s ovary had grown into a new Misaki above the pot waiting for its second awakening. It was fortunate that the ovary was in perfect condition. Receiving the seed, I told Erisa “You didn’t stop me this time, did you?” but she replied with a shocked expression, “It’s useless to do so anyway”.
I then planted the seed in Misaki’s cut open head and dripped some blood. I also begged Erisa to share with me Sari’s flesh so I would have more time to gaze at Misaki to my heart’s content instead of going out to search for a new corpse.
Aside from picking up her head in the cabin, I didn’t go back there a second time. Though, I was blessed to find the necessary tools to behead her set all in one place. The remainder of the body was left rotting due to microbes and enzyme.
I tried to brainwash Misaki once again.
I made her to forget about Isezaki for real this time.
And to not assault me.
To love me from the bottom of her heart.
As if I was praying, I repeated this imprinting as long as I was awake.
Right after the flower fell, I started releasing Misaki.
As I was cutting the root, her eyebrow started to quiver.
“You were protecting me and loving me? How gross. I can’t believe you’re approaching me like that. And hey, could you stop staring at me? You’re disgusting, give me a break!”
The second Misaki was a person who abused and criticized me for my looks and character. I already knew about her too-frank personality, but this time her filthy speech made her look like a different woman.
She just said every thought she had on her mind. She was just a mass of rudeness.
This was not the Misaki that I wanted to bring back.
An abrupt fire ignited in my head and before I realized it, I found myself thrusting the dagger knife I picked from the cabin into her neck.
The sharp edge pierced her throat making her unpleasant voice come to a halt.
Pulling out the knife, blood spilled onto the floor, and Misaki began to aimlessly walk inside the room until she eventually ran out of battery and collapsed on the floor. Unmoving.
The crafting tools she worked hard to make when she was still human were painted with her splattered blood, turning the interior room into some painting of gore.
When I noticed that Misaki stopped twitching, I was attacked by an intense regret.
I killed Misaki again. Not because I was defending myself, but only due to my uncontrolled emotions.
I’m going to need another seed from Erisa. Still, now that I already submitted Sari’s corpse, I don’t have any more measures left. If I lazed around, Misaki’s head will rot and worms would begin to grown in her head.
As I was troubled by this, but then an idea popped in my mind. It could be even described as a revelation.
I took Misaki to the bathroom and ripped off her abdomen with a carver.
[Admin: Wow, dude. Such love you have for her.]
Using a medical book that I found in her house as a reference, I kept on churning her insides while pushing my way through her pink organs, drenched by blood, and detached them until I attained what I was looking for.
The ovaries.
I heard from Erisa about the Shishikuibana’s constitution being similar to humans, but I was still delighted by figuring out that the same thing applies to the internal organs as well.
Without further delay, I brought the ovary with me to Erisa in the shop. She gave me a grim look when she saw it.
“I don’t mind if it’s just the ovary, but…” Erisa picked the genitalia I carried by her fingers.
“I’d like it if you told me its owner at least.”
When I remained silent to her sharp question, she made a sigh.
“I didn’t want to say this but let me go out of my way now. You know about Iruse Misaki’s body, I actually hired the Mogura to deliver it for me here. After some negotiation, they stepped back on taking the lower half.”
Erisa’s words cleared away the doubt I had from a while ago. She told me that she cut Misaki’s head at the construction site. However, I didn’t hear anything in the news mentioning the discovery of a headless lump of meat. That was of course because Erisa brought it with her.
“Most of her parts were crushed by the mountain of materials, but I was barely able to safely extract the ovary. Which I used to make the seed I offered you for the first time.”
I couldn’t blame her for what she did. Erisa wasn’t planning on murdering Misaki in the first place, it was the complete opposite that took place. Rather, she had the compassion to offer a piece of bread to the person who slapped her in the face… Although I was the one who received that piece of bread.
“As I thought. You were intending on reviving Misaki from the start.”
“Something you can see from my actions.”
“Even though she tried to kill you?.”
“I wanted to hear the reason she did that from her own mouth. What left me hesitating was the caution in me against whether she will perhaps assault me once I revive her, or the lack of will to waste a seed out of curiosity.”
I was about to ask her why she didn’t simply brainwash Misaki, but I decided to keep quiet.
I learned the hard way that brainwashing doesn’t always succeed. For Erisa who was well versed in the Shishikuibana, it’s quite possible that she already thought about such possibility.
“By your unexpected entry, Iruse Misaki took her shape once again. Perhaps if you didn’t show up, I would have handed the seed to somebody else,” saying that, Erisa took out a new seed from the vault.
“My misgiving is about you possibly holding this grand idea of this Iruse Misaki. Just like a painter who is hard to please, trying not to smash every piece that doesn’t suit your taste.”
[Admin: I think he just wants her not to hate him or want to kill him. Don’t think it’s every detail.]
Feeling as if she saw through my soul, I received the seed and excused myself from the shop.
Returning back to my room, I instantly beheaded the abusive Misaki and planted the seed.
Last time, I left Misaki’s corpse in the cabin for a long while. Not to mention her head being damaged, her brain that began rotting was surely the origin of the inferior growth which led to the revival of an ill-natured Misaki. But this time it’s okay, I can give birth to a pure, obedient one.
[Pr: Am I the only who is getting the feeling this is turning into some sort of twisted Hentai, without sex?]
Unfortunately, my wishful thinking was quickly betrayed.
The third Misaki was a child.
Staring at me with her vacant eyes, she repeatedly called “Ku~ya, Ku~ya” like an idiot who doesn’t remember anything aside from that name.
She didn’t change her words no matter how long I talked to her.
I couldn’t even check whether she’s possessing an affection towards me or not.
[Admin: Seriously? That’s what you’re worried about?]
I recalled the moment when she teased me saying, “Your appearance is that of a child while inside you are that of an old man.”
Isn’t it the opposite for you now?.. She didn’t reply to my retort.
Getting controlled by my irritation again, I struck the knife in her bare chest.
I dragged the dying Misaki to the bathroom, ripped open her belly and took out the ovary. Right next to me, the rotting headless corpse of the rude Misaki was releasing a concentrated stench.
After bringing the ovary with me to the shop, Erisa handed me the seed without speaking a word.
She didn’t attempt to convince me anymore.
Regarding the raising of the third body, I remained in Misaki’s house instead of returning home. I lost sight of my phone somewhere along the way, but that served more as a relief since I became out of range from any outside contact. I could finally focus completely on reviving Misaki.
Her parent’s long absence was also a cause for relief. I’m not sure whether they’re ignoring their daughter, or they just blindly believed in her.
I started sleeping during the day and waking up in the dusk to go wander around the town searching for new flesh.
Business district, riverbed, railways and dump sites.
With the eyes of a predator, I visited every possible place where I could find a corpse lying on the ground. In case I didn’t find anything, I would proceed to the gathering spots of vagrants or to the prostitution quarters. I either drew them in using money or approached a mature prostitute while wearing the mask of a customer.
“This is not a dump site! You’re troubling me by bringing this low-quality flesh every single day. Give me a break!”
I listened to Erisa’s complaints, however, to me, the quality of the flesh was not important. What really mattered was collecting a large amount in a short time.
In the process of raising the Shishikuibana, I noticed that its rate of development is related to the amount of meat I feed it. The more flesh I offer it, the quicker the Shishikuibana matures. And so, I continued to collect more flesh whilst hearing out Erisa’s complaints every time.
Misaki’s house became overflowing from the stink of her headless bodies and the rotting flesh which she had yet to eat. Throwing away the unnecessary parts in a garbage site was out of the question. The entire house got polluted by the extreme hellish miasma, though for me who was immersed in raising up Misaki forgetting to eat and sleep, it didn’t really matter. I poured all of my time and labor in bringing her up. Exactly as Erisa mentioned, I kept on doing so for the sake of making my ideal Misaki.
However, seeming to be ridiculing my hard work, the more I redid the resuscitation process, the more Misaki kept swaying away from being human. The outward appearance was indeed consistent, but her inside was empty.
Up from the fourth try, she didn’t emit the smallest voice anymore and remained absent-mindedly gaping at my face with her vacant eyes. It was even suspicious if she recognized me or not.
Cutting the root didn’t result in the least change of emotions on her face.
I killed Misaki out of disappointment and planted the seed in her skull again.
Raising Misaki then killing her to raise her again and kill her.
My life became the embodiment of this repetition.
Who cares about college entry exams anyway.
Continuing to endlessly construct my elaborate doll in the depths of hell, I expected Misaki to smile to me one day. I am a miserable Pygmalion who was rescued by nobody. The goddess didn’t seem to be descending upon me anytime soon.
I eventually lost sight of my purpose. Am I killing Misaki in order to revive her, or am I reviving her in order to kill her? I couldn’t distinguish between them anymore.
“You look too pale, are you eating well?”
When I was receiving the seed for the XX time, Erisa pointed to my health condition, only to get an “I’m fine” as a reply from me. But in the actuality, my body stopped accepting food. I wonder if my mental condition affected my health. No matter what I ate, it just disappears as if I swallowed a dumpling, leaving only an uncomfortable feeling behind.
“You need to eat something of high nutrition, else you will be ruined. If you get too worked about reviving Iruse Misaki, you will end up just like her.”
If it’s about high nutrition food then I literally have a mountain of it in Misaki’s house. However, there’s no way for me to resort to eating human flesh.
[Admin: ….]
I am a human, not a Shishikuibana.
I am a human, no matter how much I starve, I wouldn’t resort to eating human flesh.
I am a human, I wish for my beloved person to come back.
I am a human, if I fail, I’m going to have to kill Misaki again.
I am a human, I make use of this fact to draw near humanity even more.
I am a human, my left arm that got bitten by the vagrant I attacked is throbbing.
I am a human, I murder people in order to acquire flesh.
I am a human, somehow using the knife became difficult.
I am a human, I rip off Misaki’s abdomen in order to acquire the seed.
I am a human, I would never eat that rotten flesh.
I am a human, wait, where did my left arm go again?
[Pr: Wait, what?]
[Admin: reminds me of that dream he had, *hint hint*.]
*****
Erisa has said it once.
The end abruptly knocks on the doors, without any previous notice or restraint.
In my case, rather than knocking, it rang the bell.
The season turned into winter.
That faint resounding sound stirred up my heart and drove me out of the abyss of despair.
It’s been three months since I decided to stay in Misaki’s house and nobody had visited in that period.
Misaki’s parents wouldn’t ring the bell.
Misaki’s friends wouldn’t violently strike the door.
The neighbors wouldn’t tear down the lock.
The bill collector wouldn’t step in the house without permission. Newspaper or religious employees wouldn’t scream, “It stinks! What’s this smell?!” in the corridor of the first floor. A door-to-door salesman wouldn’t go up the stairs.
Countless possibilities emerged and disappeared in my mind. My brain changed into a crucible of madness and I went all rigid in Misaki’s room while waiting for the end to show up.
The intruder who walked up the stairs opened the door with no hesitation.
“I started thinking of an excuse to make if I struck the wrong house, but…”
A familiar voice of a well-known person.
The last person I was expecting to find me in this place.
“It seems there was no need to worry about that.”
Haruhito looked down on me who was lying on the floor.
His face felt somehow grieved.
“Finally, when I thought I found you, things turned out like this. To make the matter even worse, it was you who turned this house into a mess”
“Haruhito, I–”
“You can still talk? That means you’re still in your last moments.”
Haruhito say a word about the Misaki above the pot.
I tried standing up, but all I could do at that time was lifting my head.
It’s only natural. After all, I have already lost my arms and legs.
[Pr: Worry not, you did not miss anything, I’m just as confused as you]
My insides are feeling heavy and muddled similar to melting lead.
“I’ll scold you later. Now we’re going back.”
Haruhito displayed a rare tender expression filled with his warmth toward me.
I just recalled that he made the same face in the morning when I was informed of my mother’s death. He interrupted my question back then saying, “I’ll explain things for you later.”
Leaving that verbal promise unprotected, I still don’t know the reason for my mother’s death even until now.
Haruhito reached his hands to my back and lifted me up.
BON!
I fell to the floor.
But I wonder why.
My eyes still reflect my torso held in his hands.
“Dammit! Am I late!?”
Late from what? I attempted to ask him, but I couldn’t let out my voice.
My field of vision gradually got darker.
What’s this?
What’s going on?
What’s happening to me?
*****
Someone is singing.
Covered by warmth, I perked my ears to the singing voice.
I was dozing off on someone’s chest.
It doesn’t look like I’m in Misaki’s room.
Is it Haruhito who’s embracing me like this?
No. This is another level of softness and warmth. A hug wrapping up my very soul.
Why am I completely oblivious as to why I ended up in this place?
I feel like something grave had occurred, but I don’t remember anything besides that.
I moved my neck and noticed the figure of a girl and boy standing on the opposite path.
They were both dressed in the uniform of a school I was attending this last spring.
The boy had an angry expression while the girl seemed to be in the depth of sadness, and they were both shedding floods of tears.
I wonder who they are.
I can somehow recall their faces, yet I can’t remember their names.
The girl moved her lips. Even though I could tell what she’s saying, her voice didn’t reach my ears as if we were separated by a thick wall of glass.
The singing voice is still on-going.
Swaying like a wave.
Swiftly flowing like a clear stream.
Before I realized it, my surroundings changed into a purplish, red field full of blooming flowers.
Flowers that don’t close up when their petals begin to get blown off and get shaken by the breeze.
The girl and the boy disappeared from my view.
The person hugging me kept singing while walking in the field.
I raised my head trying to confirm that person’s face but, I couldn’t see well due to the lighting.
Making our way out of the field, we arrived at a deserted land.
The idyllic ambiance was nowhere to be found, but the dazzling lights above our heads didn’t show any sign of dimming.
Don’t be scared. It’s not scary. You are fine, you’re okay.
Everything will turn out well once you open your eyes again.
That’s why, take a little break now.
It took me quite a bit of time to recognize that the song’s lyrics were directed to persuade me.
A warm drop fell on my cheek.
This person is crying.
I’m sorry, Kuuya.
I finally realized that the owner of that sorrowful voice was my mother.
Suddenly the sky was got cloudy and the light started weakening allowing me to see my mother’s face.
Aah, that’s right. It was this face. I wonder why I forgot about my her face until now.
Strangely enough, it wasn’t like I didn’t recall it, but I felt that remembering it would only bring me a form of regret.
Sorry.
My mother repeated the same phrase.
Vaguely wondering why my mother was apologizing and why she pushing something cool onto my neck.
A sharp sensation ran through my nape making my consciousness sink into the depth of the darkness.
