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Turning Back Time - Chapter 1

Published at 4th of March 2016 01:00:10 AM


Chapter 1

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Mom shouted loudly through the phone: “What? Separating? Why?”

I frowned. My ears hurt and I took the phone further away from me.

Divorce concerns two parties only. It is a marriage between them and yet, it is not them, but others, who constantly ask for the reason for their divorce.

“Mom, we have signed the papers today. Your objection is overruled.” I said.

Mom prompted further, “Who initiated the divorce?”

I replied, “It’s me. I like someone else.”

Mom did not believe me and said, “You are my daughter. I know what kind of person you are!”

I laughed for I do not even know what kind of person I am. “Mom, you don’t have to worry. There are so many couples divorcing every day. We are just one of them.”

Mom retorted, “But in this world, there are countless of couples who spend the rest of their lives together. Why are you not one of them?”

I replied to Mom out of the corner of my strained smile, “We didn’t manage to master that skill well enough.”

Mom sighed, “Dan Xin, Dan Xin[1]… We didn’t name you well. You always make me worry.”

Tears welled up in my eyes. Only Mom would unconditionally love me this way.

I said, “Mom, I’m fine. I’m still young and still have a chance to find a good man.”

“Both of you have been together well and all… Why separating suddenly… The house and the car…” Mom mumbled and repeated the same sentences again.

When I hung up the phone, she was still shouting for my name at the other end of the line.

There was a moment of complete silence. I felt really tired and exhausted. There was only me and my cat in the empty house. I looked around the luxuriously decorated master bedroom and saw the photo of us still hanging on the wall. It was taken during our trip to Jiuzhaigou. At that time, his charm was accompanied with a touch of immaturity. At that time, I was completely in love with him.

I stood up on the sofa, took the photo off the wall and threw it into a corner of the sofa.

When I mentioned the divorce, he was sitting on this sofa.

I said bluntly, “Cheng Rui, I want to get a divorce.”

It was as if I was telling him nothing special.

“Cheng Rui, I am going to buy food from the street.”

“Cheng Rui, I am going back to visit my parents.”

He was reading the music scores. This year, his career reached a peak along with his record-breaking album sales. His news and posters were all over the place. They called him the Siren – the mythical creature who lures nearby sailors with his enchanting voice.

My ever-dashing husband who has entered into countless number of girls’ wet dream ultimately had to walk out my life – no matter how unwilling he was.

He heard my words and raised his head, looking a little shocked. No matter how much time has passed, his mesmerising eyes never fade away with time. He stared deeply into my eyes and looked at me in silence for a long, long, long time. So long that I had to consider whether I should just repeat the words again until I heard him mumbled, “We have still come to this stage…”

I assumed he agreed. To be able to divorce in this way is the dream of many divorced couples. In the shortest possible time, using the simplest language and the most peaceful way, we agreed on our divorce. People come and go in your life. No one in this world can accompany you forever.

The telephone rang again. This time, I guessed Mom must have asked our relatives to ring and check on me.

But it was Cheng Rui this time. “You haven’t sleep yet?” he asked.

I looked at the clock. It was only 9pm. I laughed and replied, “I am waiting for the clock to strike 12!”

He was silent for a while before he said that he wants to collect some stuff.

No problem, I replied.

This house was bought by him and given to me when we separated. I was the one who initiated the divorce but he was the one who settled everything. He was very responsible and generous, giving the house, car, jewellery and even the flower pot in the study room to me.

That was my wedding anniversary gift to him. I gave him a flower pot and he gave me a diamond ring. A diamond lasts forever and for eternity but a flower only blossoms for one season. I actually gained.

I put down the phone and then pulled out the phone line to prevent any more ‘concerned’ relatives from calling. When we first got married, everybody questioned why would a degree-holder like me marry a busker. Why would I give up on myself like that? Was it because I was pregnant with his child? My father was so furious he gave me a tight slap. My mother did not speak to me for a long time.

But I still went ahead to marry him. I was young at that time and had all the courage and energy in the world. My heart was still untarnished then. Love was bigger than the sky, and I had him.

Cheng Rui told me that he will treat me well. Upon hearing that, I hugged him tightly. Those were the days…

Fortunately, my mother was angry because I did not tell her about the divorce and not because it will be disgraceful for the family. She was afraid I would get hurt, but it was inevitable that I will feel hurt.

There are no adults who have grown up without any emotional scars. It is just that we know how to cover up the scars well.





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