VOLUME 5 CHAPTER 11: DON’T TELL ME THIS IS THE BATTLE OF GUANDU (5)
This mountain was particularly tall but staying long inevitably made it feel chilly.
I hugged my body and tried my best to keep the cold winds away but still involuntarily shivered when the cold winds blew.
Just then, the cloud passed and rays of sunshine shone down on the sword which reflected it and blinded those who saw it. One side of the blade reflected my face and the other, Ben Chu.
Ben Chu had dragged her thick and heavy luxurious robes across the floor as she now stood staring at me menacingly.
“It’s a been a while, Ben Chu.” I raised my hand and greeted her with no tension despite her animosity.
“Hmph!” She sighed disdainfully and looked at me, and then at the frantic Xu You before back at me, “You despicable fellow!”
“Ben, Ben Chu, that’s not it…”
“Don’t speak Zi Yuan!” Ben Chu roared angrily at Xu You who was so frightened she took several steps back and did not dare to speak.
“Come on Ben Chu. It’s been so long since we last met. Why are you pointing a sword at me now that we have finally seen each other face to face?”
As I finished, I could feel an icy blade pressed against my throat, “You know why!”
“…” Cowardice had begun to fill my heart but I had no intention of backing off here.
“Meng De, it was supposed to be an upright battle between us but here you are doing sneaky, despicable acts.” Ben Chu said as she trembled from anger, “You’ve incited rebellions in my lands, stolen my supplies and killed my generals. And now you even want to steal my subordinates?”
I couldn’t really deny what she said and only stared back, at which she withdrew somewhat before clenching her teeth and staring back.
“What? Did I say anything wrong?”
At these words, I sighed, and then–
“Ben Chu!”
“!”
At the same time as my sudden yell, I swiftly raised my hand and grabbed hold of Ben Chu’s sword.
Blood sprayed out from the blade in the next instant and splattered onto Ben Chu’s luxurious fur scarf.
“You, you!” Ben Chu seemed to have withdrawn a fair bit at seeing what I did and in her eyes, I could see the exact opposite of the resolve from just now.
“Meng De! What are you doing that for!” Xu You ran up and grabbed my wounded hand and forcibly separated it from the blade. Xu You’s face turned pale as she looked at my hand, “Why! Why did you do this?!”
“… I’m just sad.” I sighed and continued in my normal, calm tone, “We probably won’t be able to see the original Ben Chu anymore.”
Out of the corner of my eye, I seemed to see Ben Chu’s shoulder tremble at my words.
“Ben Chu…” I said as I looked at the somewhat shell-shocked Ben Chu, “From your perspective, are Zi Yuan and the rest just your subordinates?”
“What?”
“Because you have lands, because you have authority, because you have lineage, does that mean you can act like you’re above everyone else?!”
“Kuh! Subordinates are just subordinates. To me, I’ve long since thrown away things like companions since the time I became the Governor of Ji stare.” Ben Chu swung her sword away and sheathed it as she turned away so I couldn’t see her face.
“Is that really all?” I smiled warmly as I looked at Ben Chu’s back, “If that’s the case then why did you chase after Xu You alone? Why not loose a wave of arrows at her?”
“…” Ben Chu didn’t speak but I can guess why. I have that confidence.
“I believe that Ben Chu is here because you don’t want to lose your last companion.”
“What comp…”
“Has you been neglecting Zi Yuan more and more recently?”
Ben Chu was stunned and looked back at me with bewilderment.
Seeing Ben Chu like this, I cam more or less confirm what I was guessing.
Xu You has always been ignored since a long time ago due to her frail sense of existence and only I and Ben Chu can consistently perceive her.
The reason is because we both have a heart that is accepting of all. And in our eyes, the weak but hardworking Xu You has her own characteristic charm.
But Ben Chu now, or perhaps since the time of the expedition against Dong Zhuo, has long since lost that heart.
She had unknowingly become an arrogant and narrow-minded despot.
“… Meng De, what kind of nonsense are you spouting?” Ben Chu finally mustered up what fight in her she had left after a long pause, “Times have changed and now feudal lords are rising up every which way. As the descendent of an illustrious family, all eyes of the people of the Great Han are on me as they look toward me to do something for the world. As a noble, how am I supposed to be intimate with my subordinates?”
As she said so, she pointed at me.
“And what about you? You are just the foster granddaughter of a eunuch. No one has any expectations of you. And so you can do whatever you want and advance with no pressure whatsoever. Even if you fail, you will be just one of the many failures in history. But I, as a noble of the Great Han, will forever be remembered as a sinner of the Han dynasty should I fail.”
You don’t understand.
I’m tired too.
These words floated up on Ben Chu’a face.
Indeed, what she said is correct. Perhaps the main difference between the 2 of us is as she said.
But…
“But what right do you have to let your stress out on your subordinates?” I was pretty riled up by now and took a quick step forward and grabbed her shoulders, “You’re a noble, but so what? Shouldn’t you be prioritising being a good lord over your duty to history? How can you expect your subordinates to die for you when your goals are so abstract and unreachable!!”
“Let go of me, Meng De!”
“Do you how painful it is for Zi Yuan to be by your side but not be seen by you? Is this how you treat your companions?!”
“Kuh…” My last words finally deflated Ben Chu completely. And I only loosened my grip on her when I saw regret on her face.
“Meng De… Ben Chu…” Xu You wavered between the 2 of us. She wanted to do something but she didn’t know what she should do.
“Zi Yuan, go back with Ben Chu.”
“Eh?”
“I’ve helped you solve what you wanted me to, no?”
“Ah… Un.” Xu You finally recoveredband looked at the letter in her hands before she finally understood and nodded shyly.
“What is the meaning of this?” Ben Chu said as she snatched the letter and began reading it.
Actually, I wasn’t looking to get information from Xu You. All I wrote on the letter was: [Do you wish for Ben Chu to return to how she was before?]. Honestly, I was just being a busybody.
What was unexpected was how fast Ben Chu got here. I’d thought it would be a very cumbersome task but it resolved itself so easily.
Was it Ben Chu herself who still paid attention to Xu You? Or was it ‘that person’ who managed to turn Ben Chu around lately?
Probably both.
As I thought so, Ben Chu had finished reading the letter and was deep in thought. She looked at me and turned away.
“Meng De is really too irritating. Just wait, I’ll defeat you soon enough.”
— Meng De! I’ll defeat you one day!
For an instant, the figure of a little girl yelling at me with an unwavering strength appeared in my eyes.
“Kekeke…” Xu You was probably thinking the same thing as I was as she started giggling.
“Hahaha.” I couldn’t hold back and began laughing as well,” Good! I await your performance on the battlefield!”
VOLUME 5 CHAPTER 11: DON’T TELL ME THIS IS THE BATTLE OF GUANDU (5)
This mountain was particularly tall but staying long inevitably made it feel chilly.
I hugged my body and tried my best to keep the cold winds away but still involuntarily shivered when the cold winds blew.
Just then, the cloud passed and rays of sunshine shone down on the sword which reflected it and blinded those who saw it. One side of the blade reflected my face and the other, Ben Chu.
Ben Chu had dragged her thick and heavy luxurious robes across the floor as she now stood staring at me menacingly.
“It’s a been a while, Ben Chu.” I raised my hand and greeted her with no tension despite her animosity.
“Hmph!” She sighed disdainfully and looked at me, and then at the frantic Xu You before back at me, “You despicable fellow!”
“Ben, Ben Chu, that’s not it…”
“Don’t speak Zi Yuan!” Ben Chu roared angrily at Xu You who was so frightened she took several steps back and did not dare to speak.
“Come on Ben Chu. It’s been so long since we last met. Why are you pointing a sword at me now that we have finally seen each other face to face?”
As I finished, I could feel an icy blade pressed against my throat, “You know why!”
“…” Cowardice had begun to fill my heart but I had no intention of backing off here.
“Meng De, it was supposed to be an upright battle between us but here you are doing sneaky, despicable acts.” Ben Chu said as she trembled from anger, “You’ve incited rebellions in my lands, stolen my supplies and killed my generals. And now you even want to steal my subordinates?”
I couldn’t really deny what she said and only stared back, at which she withdrew somewhat before clenching her teeth and staring back.
“What? Did I say anything wrong?”
At these words, I sighed, and then–
“Ben Chu!”
“!”
At the same time as my sudden yell, I swiftly raised my hand and grabbed hold of Ben Chu’s sword.
Blood sprayed out from the blade in the next instant and splattered onto Ben Chu’s luxurious fur scarf.
“You, you!” Ben Chu seemed to have withdrawn a fair bit at seeing what I did and in her eyes, I could see the exact opposite of the resolve from just now.
“Meng De! What are you doing that for!” Xu You ran up and grabbed my wounded hand and forcibly separated it from the blade. Xu You’s face turned pale as she looked at my hand, “Why! Why did you do this?!”
“… I’m just sad.” I sighed and continued in my normal, calm tone, “We probably won’t be able to see the original Ben Chu anymore.”
Out of the corner of my eye, I seemed to see Ben Chu’s shoulder tremble at my words.
“Ben Chu…” I said as I looked at the somewhat shell-shocked Ben Chu, “From your perspective, are Zi Yuan and the rest just your subordinates?”
“What?”
“Because you have lands, because you have authority, because you have lineage, does that mean you can act like you’re above everyone else?!”
“Kuh! Subordinates are just subordinates. To me, I’ve long since thrown away things like companions since the time I became the Governor of Ji stare.” Ben Chu swung her sword away and sheathed it as she turned away so I couldn’t see her face.
“Is that really all?” I smiled warmly as I looked at Ben Chu’s back, “If that’s the case then why did you chase after Xu You alone? Why not loose a wave of arrows at her?”
“…” Ben Chu didn’t speak but I can guess why. I have that confidence.
“I believe that Ben Chu is here because you don’t want to lose your last companion.”
“What comp…”
“Has you been neglecting Zi Yuan more and more recently?”
Ben Chu was stunned and looked back at me with bewilderment.
Seeing Ben Chu like this, I cam more or less confirm what I was guessing.
Xu You has always been ignored since a long time ago due to her frail sense of existence and only I and Ben Chu can consistently perceive her.
The reason is because we both have a heart that is accepting of all. And in our eyes, the weak but hardworking Xu You has her own characteristic charm.
But Ben Chu now, or perhaps since the time of the expedition against Dong Zhuo, has long since lost that heart.
She had unknowingly become an arrogant and narrow-minded despot.
“… Meng De, what kind of nonsense are you spouting?” Ben Chu finally mustered up what fight in her she had left after a long pause, “Times have changed and now feudal lords are rising up every which way. As the descendent of an illustrious family, all eyes of the people of the Great Han are on me as they look toward me to do something for the world. As a noble, how am I supposed to be intimate with my subordinates?”
As she said so, she pointed at me.
“And what about you? You are just the foster granddaughter of a eunuch. No one has any expectations of you. And so you can do whatever you want and advance with no pressure whatsoever. Even if you fail, you will be just one of the many failures in history. But I, as a noble of the Great Han, will forever be remembered as a sinner of the Han dynasty should I fail.”
You don’t understand.
I’m tired too.
These words floated up on Ben Chu’a face.
Indeed, what she said is correct. Perhaps the main difference between the 2 of us is as she said.
But…
“But what right do you have to let your stress out on your subordinates?” I was pretty riled up by now and took a quick step forward and grabbed her shoulders, “You’re a noble, but so what? Shouldn’t you be prioritising being a good lord over your duty to history? How can you expect your subordinates to die for you when your goals are so abstract and unreachable!!”
“Let go of me, Meng De!”
“Do you how painful it is for Zi Yuan to be by your side but not be seen by you? Is this how you treat your companions?!”
“Kuh…” My last words finally deflated Ben Chu completely. And I only loosened my grip on her when I saw regret on her face.
“Meng De… Ben Chu…” Xu You wavered between the 2 of us. She wanted to do something but she didn’t know what she should do.
“Zi Yuan, go back with Ben Chu.”
“Eh?”
“I’ve helped you solve what you wanted me to, no?”
“Ah… Un.” Xu You finally recoveredband looked at the letter in her hands before she finally understood and nodded shyly.
“What is the meaning of this?” Ben Chu said as she snatched the letter and began reading it.
Actually, I wasn’t looking to get information from Xu You. All I wrote on the letter was: [Do you wish for Ben Chu to return to how she was before?]. Honestly, I was just being a busybody.
What was unexpected was how fast Ben Chu got here. I’d thought it would be a very cumbersome task but it resolved itself so easily.
Was it Ben Chu herself who still paid attention to Xu You? Or was it ‘that person’ who managed to turn Ben Chu around lately?
Probably both.
As I thought so, Ben Chu had finished reading the letter and was deep in thought. She looked at me and turned away.
“Meng De is really too irritating. Just wait, I’ll defeat you soon enough.”
— Meng De! I’ll defeat you one day!
For an instant, the figure of a little girl yelling at me with an unwavering strength appeared in my eyes.
“Kekeke…” Xu You was probably thinking the same thing as I was as she started giggling.
“Hahaha.” I couldn’t hold back and began laughing as well,” Good! I await your performance on the battlefield!”
