Chapter 14
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My chest felt loose the instant the guests left. My anxiety gauge not only was filled to the brim, it even exploded. Just imagine my ballroom dancing. If it was a dance party like in the clubs then I'd be happy bouncing.
During my early 20's, in my old self, I was club hopping with my friends. It was a place where we can relieve the stress of working. As there were a lot of people around, you could get away with just bending your hand up and down, nod your head or bounce while rolling your shoulders. So long as you're enjoying yourself, it's hard to find a flaw.
What happens inside stays inside. You're all strangers.
Even my parents were exhausted. As the hosts, they made sure that the guests were all having fun; they attended and chatted with them.
We said goodnight to each other then went to our rooms. Ginger is still with us, she'll be staying until tomorrow night.
I wanted to go to bed directly. I took off my contact lenses, one without a grade. It was something I conveniently ordered; after all, I need to act as someone with a bad vision. I properly cared for it according to manufacturing instructions.
After changing my clothes and a quick shower, I laid in bed.
Never in my life had I dreamed of celebrating my birthday in that kind of manner. From the clothes to the food up to the tiny decorations we had, it was all expensive. It was too much, to the point it screamed wasteful.
If I had that kind of amount before then I would have no need to take on two jobs to enroll myself for a semester.
I put on music to alter my thoughts. I wanted to enjoy it, to passively help in relieving my mood yet it reminded me of that cursed ballroom dance.
I opened my eyes and stopped the music from playing.
My thoughts went back to my time with the diner guy. He clearly mocked me, reminding me of that choking incident.
I can't believe I was defeated by that. I should've retorted but I can't even think of anything to say. I was just stupefied. I wanted to slap myself.
'Think of good things, cute kinds of stuff, anything.' I chanted.
Good things, cute stuff.....my crush and choco?
Choco is a lovely Labrador pup I fell in loved when I accompanied a friend volunteering for a day at an animal shelter. Its mom had abandoned him after birth and some good-hearted citizens found him. He had a problem with one of his legs, so when he walks, he's limping.
Speaking of my crush, I wonder who he'd hook up this time. Last time it was a teacher from my old high school and before she was the vice principal of the same school.
Liam reminds me of him. They have like sixty percent similarities in outward appearance wise? Especially that smile and jawline of his. It was heart racing.
Then imagination flowed as I drifted to sleep.
Dark circles formed under my eyes when I woke up as a result of not getting enough sleep. I blame myself for the unnecessary thoughts I had this evening.
The maids had done their job accordingly. After the morning talk last time, they are now much more careful when attending to me.
"Good morning mom." I kissed my mother then went to do the same with father. "Good morning, your majesty," I said curtsying after.
They were in the middle of laughter when I met them in the hallway.
"Good morning, Darling." "Good morning, princess." They said simultaneously.
"Good morning, Ginger dear." Mother said looking past me. Father and I turned around to give her a slight nod.
"Good morning Aunt, Uncle," then she looks at my direction "Iris." She greeted in return.
"Dad, will you join us for breakfast today? You seldom eat with us." I complained holding his and mother's hand.
"That's why I'm here. I'm all yours to order for a day." He gave a simple bow with one hand in his abdomen. Mother was giggling by his side.
In the corner of my eye, I saw Ginger's smile stiffen.
"Ah- let's not forget," I said in a little loud voice, "Ginger, can also join us."
Since Ginger's staying home then customarily she'll join us, but with me saying it out loud, she felt awkward.
"Of course, of course." Mother agreed.
"If Aunt says so." She gave mother a grateful look.
Before she could come to mother's side, I held on to her and said: "Let's go then."
We had a Japanese-inspired breakfast which consists of roasted salmon, rice, pickles and miso soup.
The meal also includes a decadent spread of fruits, warm tofu, and individually wrapped pickled plums.
As father goes to work the earliest, we hardly had breakfast with him. So today mother was paying extra attention to him.
"Here, eat this."
"Try this fruit."
I felt warm looking at them. It's so lovely watching couples growing old with each other. I suddenly missed my 'own' parents. The meals and chatter we shared. I desperately wanted to meet them again.
"What's wrong?" Father worriedly asked.
"Darling what's wrong? Are you in pain? I'll call the hospital." Mother said in an anxious voice.
"Uh?" I uttered absentmindedly then felt something wet on my cheeks. It appears that while I was missing my old life, tears flowed down my face.
"Nothing, mom I'm okay." I stopped mother who's already on her phone. I wiped my cheeks and continued, "I'm good, just hug me okay?"
Though she looked doubtful, Mother circled her arms around me whispering, "Are you sure you're okay?"
"I am."
"Iris." called father. He was already standing behind me with one hand on my shoulder.
I broke off from the hug and faced them. "I was just being emotional, sorry?."
I really felt apologetic. Their here expressing concern for me yet I was thinking of my own parents.
Both stayed on their spot quietly looking at me.
I let out a sigh, "It's just that it's been long since the three of us sat together like this. I felt nostalgic."
It's what I really felt. It's directed to my real parents in my old life though.
This time it was father who's regretful, "I'm sorry. I should've made more time."He held me and patted my back.
"It's fine. We have our reasons."I comforted.
"Why don't we stop this and Let's enjoy our day, shall we?."I requested.
At that, we ended the melodrama we created.
Father is a liar. He said that he'll be home for a day but went to work in the afternoon. Ginger went out after breakfast.
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My chest felt loose the instant the guests left. My anxiety gauge not only was filled to the brim, it even exploded. Just imagine my ballroom dancing. If it was a dance party like in the clubs then I'd be happy bouncing.
During my early 20's, in my old self, I was club hopping with my friends. It was a place where we can relieve the stress of working. As there were a lot of people around, you could get away with just bending your hand up and down, nod your head or bounce while rolling your shoulders. So long as you're enjoying yourself, it's hard to find a flaw.
What happens inside stays inside. You're all strangers.
Even my parents were exhausted. As the hosts, they made sure that the guests were all having fun; they attended and chatted with them.
We said goodnight to each other then went to our rooms. Ginger is still with us, she'll be staying until tomorrow night.
I wanted to go to bed directly. I took off my contact lenses, one without a grade. It was something I conveniently ordered; after all, I need to act as someone with a bad vision. I properly cared for it according to manufacturing instructions.
After changing my clothes and a quick shower, I laid in bed.
Never in my life had I dreamed of celebrating my birthday in that kind of manner. From the clothes to the food up to the tiny decorations we had, it was all expensive. It was too much, to the point it screamed wasteful.
If I had that kind of amount before then I would have no need to take on two jobs to enroll myself for a semester.
I put on music to alter my thoughts. I wanted to enjoy it, to passively help in relieving my mood yet it reminded me of that cursed ballroom dance.
I opened my eyes and stopped the music from playing.
My thoughts went back to my time with the diner guy. He clearly mocked me, reminding me of that choking incident.
I can't believe I was defeated by that. I should've retorted but I can't even think of anything to say. I was just stupefied. I wanted to slap myself.
'Think of good things, cute kinds of stuff, anything.' I chanted.
Good things, cute stuff.....my crush and choco?
Choco is a lovely Labrador pup I fell in loved when I accompanied a friend volunteering for a day at an animal shelter. Its mom had abandoned him after birth and some good-hearted citizens found him. He had a problem with one of his legs, so when he walks, he's limping.
Speaking of my crush, I wonder who he'd hook up this time. Last time it was a teacher from my old high school and before she was the vice principal of the same school.
Liam reminds me of him. They have like sixty percent similarities in outward appearance wise? Especially that smile and jawline of his. It was heart racing.
Then imagination flowed as I drifted to sleep.
Dark circles formed under my eyes when I woke up as a result of not getting enough sleep. I blame myself for the unnecessary thoughts I had this evening.
The maids had done their job accordingly. After the morning talk last time, they are now much more careful when attending to me.
"Good morning mom." I kissed my mother then went to do the same with father. "Good morning, your majesty," I said curtsying after.
They were in the middle of laughter when I met them in the hallway.
"Good morning, Darling." "Good morning, princess." They said simultaneously.
"Good morning, Ginger dear." Mother said looking past me. Father and I turned around to give her a slight nod.
"Good morning Aunt, Uncle," then she looks at my direction "Iris." She greeted in return.
"Dad, will you join us for breakfast today? You seldom eat with us." I complained holding his and mother's hand.
"That's why I'm here. I'm all yours to order for a day." He gave a simple bow with one hand in his abdomen. Mother was giggling by his side.
In the corner of my eye, I saw Ginger's smile stiffen.
"Ah- let's not forget," I said in a little loud voice, "Ginger, can also join us."
Since Ginger's staying home then customarily she'll join us, but with me saying it out loud, she felt awkward.
"Of course, of course." Mother agreed.
"If Aunt says so." She gave mother a grateful look.
Before she could come to mother's side, I held on to her and said: "Let's go then."
We had a Japanese-inspired breakfast which consists of roasted salmon, rice, pickles and miso soup.
The meal also includes a decadent spread of fruits, warm tofu, and individually wrapped pickled plums.
As father goes to work the earliest, we hardly had breakfast with him. So today mother was paying extra attention to him.
"Here, eat this."
"Try this fruit."
I felt warm looking at them. It's so lovely watching couples growing old with each other. I suddenly missed my 'own' parents. The meals and chatter we shared. I desperately wanted to meet them again.
"What's wrong?" Father worriedly asked.
"Darling what's wrong? Are you in pain? I'll call the hospital." Mother said in an anxious voice.
"Uh?" I uttered absentmindedly then felt something wet on my cheeks. It appears that while I was missing my old life, tears flowed down my face.
"Nothing, mom I'm okay." I stopped mother who's already on her phone. I wiped my cheeks and continued, "I'm good, just hug me okay?"
Though she looked doubtful, Mother circled her arms around me whispering, "Are you sure you're okay?"
"I am."
"Iris." called father. He was already standing behind me with one hand on my shoulder.
I broke off from the hug and faced them. "I was just being emotional, sorry?."
I really felt apologetic. Their here expressing concern for me yet I was thinking of my own parents.
Both stayed on their spot quietly looking at me.
I let out a sigh, "It's just that it's been long since the three of us sat together like this. I felt nostalgic."
It's what I really felt. It's directed to my real parents in my old life though.
This time it was father who's regretful, "I'm sorry. I should've made more time."He held me and patted my back.
"It's fine. We have our reasons."I comforted.
"Why don't we stop this and Let's enjoy our day, shall we?."I requested.
At that, we ended the melodrama we created.
Father is a liar. He said that he'll be home for a day but went to work in the afternoon. Ginger went out after breakfast.
My chest felt loose the instant the guests left. My anxiety gauge not only was filled to the brim, it even exploded. Just imagine my ballroom dancing. If it was a dance party like in the clubs then I'd be happy bouncing.During my early 20's, in my old self, I was club hopping with my friends. It was a place where we can relieve the stress of working. As there were a lot of people around, you could get away with just bending your hand up and down, nod your head or bounce while rolling your shoulders. So long as you're enjoying yourself, it's hard to find a flaw.What happens inside stays inside. You're all strangers.Even my parents were exhausted. As the hosts, they made sure that the guests were all having fun; they attended and chatted with them.We said goodnight to each other then went to our rooms. Ginger is still with us, she'll be staying until tomorrow night.I wanted to go to bed directly. I took off my contact lenses, one without a grade. It was something I conveniently ordered; after all, I need to act as someone with a bad vision. I properly cared for it according to manufacturing instructions.After changing my clothes and a quick shower, I laid in bed.Never in my life had I dreamed of celebrating my birthday in that kind of manner. From the clothes to the food up to the tiny decorations we had, it was all expensive. It was too much, to the point it screamed wasteful.If I had that kind of amount before then I would have no need to take on two jobs to enroll myself for a semester.I put on music to alter my thoughts. I wanted to enjoy it, to passively help in relieving my mood yet it reminded me of that cursed ballroom dance.I opened my eyes and stopped the music from playing.My thoughts went back to my time with the diner guy. He clearly mocked me, reminding me of that choking incident.I can't believe I was defeated by that. I should've retorted but I can't even think of anything to say. I was just stupefied. I wanted to slap myself.'Think of good things, cute kinds of stuff, anything.' I chanted.Good things, cute stuff.....my crush and choco?Choco is a lovely Labrador pup I fell in loved when I accompanied a friend volunteering for a day at an animal shelter. Its mom had abandoned him after birth and some good-hearted citizens found him. He had a problem with one of his legs, so when he walks, he's limping.Speaking of my crush, I wonder who he'd hook up this time. Last time it was a teacher from my old high school and before she was the vice principal of the same school.Liam reminds me of him. They have like sixty percent similarities in outward appearance wise? Especially that smile and jawline of his. It was heart racing.Then imagination flowed as I drifted to sleep.Dark circles formed under my eyes when I woke up as a result of not getting enough sleep. I blame myself for the unnecessary thoughts I had this evening.The maids had done their job accordingly. After the morning talk last time, they are now much more careful when attending to me."Good morning mom." I kissed my mother then went to do the same with father. "Good morning, your majesty," I said curtsying after.They were in the middle of laughter when I met them in the hallway."Good morning, Darling." "Good morning, princess." They said simultaneously."Good morning, Ginger dear." Mother said looking past me. Father and I turned around to give her a slight nod."Good morning Aunt, Uncle," then she looks at my direction "Iris." She greeted in return."Dad, will you join us for breakfast today? You seldom eat with us." I complained holding his and mother's hand."That's why I'm here. I'm all yours to order for a day." He gave a simple bow with one hand in his abdomen. Mother was giggling by his side.In the corner of my eye, I saw Ginger's smile stiffen."Ah- let's not forget," I said in a little loud voice, "Ginger, can also join us."Since Ginger's staying home then customarily she'll join us, but with me saying it out loud, she felt awkward."Of course, of course." Mother agreed."If Aunt says so." She gave mother a grateful look.Before she could come to mother's side, I held on to her and said: "Let's go then."We had a Japanese-inspired breakfast which consists of roasted salmon, rice, pickles and miso soup.The meal also includes a decadent spread of fruits, warm tofu, and individually wrapped pickled plums.As father goes to work the earliest, we hardly had breakfast with him. So today mother was paying extra attention to him."Here, eat this.""Try this fruit."I felt warm looking at them. It's so lovely watching couples growing old with each other. I suddenly missed my 'own' parents. The meals and chatter we shared. I desperately wanted to meet them again."What's wrong?" Father worriedly asked."Darling what's wrong? Are you in pain? I'll call the hospital." Mother said in an anxious voice."Uh?" I uttered absentmindedly then felt something wet on my cheeks. It appears that while I was missing my old life, tears flowed down my face."Nothing, mom I'm okay." I stopped mother who's already on her phone. I wiped my cheeks and continued, "I'm good, just hug me okay?"Though she looked doubtful, Mother circled her arms around me whispering, "Are you sure you're okay?""I am.""Iris." called father. He was already standing behind me with one hand on my shoulder.I broke off from the hug and faced them. "I was just being emotional, sorry?."I really felt apologetic. Their here expressing concern for me yet I was thinking of my own parents.Both stayed on their spot quietly looking at me.I let out a sigh, "It's just that it's been long since the three of us sat together like this. I felt nostalgic."It's what I really felt. It's directed to my real parents in my old life though.This time it was father who's regretful, "I'm sorry. I should've made more time."He held me and patted my back."It's fine. We have our reasons."I comforted."Why don't we stop this and Let's enjoy our day, shall we?."I requested.At that, we ended the melodrama we created.Father is a liar. He said that he'll be home for a day but went to work in the afternoon. Ginger went out after breakfast.
